by Red Phoenix
Anderson shakes his head. “You are seriously fucking with my mind. I need time to figure this out.” I watch him grab a duffle bag and throw some clothes into it.
“Anderson, I have a restraining order against her, and I can prove it.” I start rummaging through my desk.
“Don’t bother, Davis. I wouldn’t believe it, even if you showed me.…I’m out of here.” Before he leaves, he stops to look back at me. “Either you deserve my deepest sympathy or you’re a crazy fuck and deserve another punch in the face.”
I find myself alone again. Wiping the dried blood from my lip, I sit down at my desk and pull out a textbook from the stack. I was a fool to think I could make a life outside of my mother’s influence—I shouldn’t have tried.
A thought suddenly comes to me, causing goosebumps to rise on my skin.
What if I end up like my father?
Reclaiming What’s Mine
Too exhausted to keep my eyes open any longer, I finally head to bed.
The room has a completely different feel to it now that Anderson isn’t here, and I find I can’t sleep.
I lay on my back with my headphones on, listening to the lonely sound of my father’s violin. It feels as if I am hearing his voice as the violin sings its forlorn melody. I haven’t listened to his music since the suicide, knowing how much it would hurt me to hear it.
But, tonight, I take solace in the emotional connection as my tears fall unheeded.
“Papà…I hear you.”
I hover between the states of reality and sleep, and in that dreamlike place, my father’s music takes on a more familiar tone, blending and transforming into his voice…
“You’ve almost got it, Thane. Trim that sail.”
My memories drift back to when I was eight. I’m out on the ocean with my father, sailing near the Italian island of Isola d’Elba, where his family lives in the town of Portoferraio. He loves to sail and always finds time to take me out on his boat whenever we visit his parents.
I love the freedom I feel when I’m on the ocean, but it’s these uninterrupted times alone with my father that I cherish most. All the pressures he carries as a world-famous musician melt away when we’re sailing and it’s just my father and me.
“Do you see that small, deserted island over there?” he asks, pointing to a small speck on the horizon.
I raise my hand to shield my eyes from the sun and look in the direction he’s pointing.
“I do, Papà!”
“What say you and I go claim it?”
The thrill of playing explorers has my young heart racing. “What should we call it?”
He smiles at me as he adjusts the sails. “I think you should have the honors.”
I stare at the tiny island as we draw closer, already thinking of it as mine. “I’m calling it Isola d’ Thane.”
My father laughs. “Isola d’Thane it is, then.”
He lowers the anchor once we’re close enough to shore. Stripping off his shirt, he kicks off his shoes and dives into the water. I follow suit, swimming quickly to catch up with him.
Feeling like a true explorer, I climb a small cliff of rocks and look out with pride onto a grassy expanse surrounded by trees and vegetation.
My father puts his hand on my shoulder. “This is a fine island, son.”
“Sí, Papà,” I agree proudly.
Pretending it’s mine, I explore every inch of it, hoping to find buried treasure, and my father joins me. We search every outcropping of rock, and the base of the trees, as well as the sandy alcoves.
I’m so entranced by my island that I don’t even care when we don’t find any. “I could live here,” I declare.
My father laughs. The sound of his laughter is low and warm like the sun on my soul.
I’ve forgotten that…
“Sorry, my boy, but that would not be very fair to your mother. You know how much she loves you.”
I frown and cross my arms in protest. I don’t want to leave.
“Let’s return next year to see if any pirates have left treasure behind. You and I will make it our yearly quest.”
My eyes light up. “Next time, I’ll bring a flag to claim my island.”
Papa ruffles my hair. “And I’ll stand by your side to watch you plant it.”
“Promise, Papà?”
“Promise.”
I look over Isola d’Thane with a sense of great pride, having no idea how important this small island will become to him—and me.
I drift to sleep afterward and wake in the morning with that memory and the sound of his voice still lingering in my mind.
I have hundreds of cherished memories of my father, memories I’ve held back because of the pain they cause. I’m realizing now that in refusing to embrace them, I have kept him at a distance and, if I continue long enough, I will lose him completely.
My father’s zest for life and his contagious spirit of adventure was something I’ve always admired, and both live on in me. It gives me a sense of power.
I will not concede defeat to the Beast—I need to fight for what’s mine.
I go to our Advanced Economics class, hoping to speak with Samantha. When she shows up, she sees me and chooses to sit as far away as physically possible. She won’t even look in my direction.
Inspired by the unexplainable sense of hope I felt earlier, I suddenly have a stroke of inspiration. Tearing out a piece of paper from my notebook, I write in large letters: As my friend, I made a vow to never hurt you. That remains true. ~Thane
I fold it into an airplane and write Open me on the left wing.
With five minutes left before class begins, and feeling slightly foolish, I turn around to face her, taking aim. With a quick flick of the wrist, I send it sailing straight toward her.
Turning around quickly, I pull out my textbook and open it up to today’s topic of discussion. I spend the entire class wondering if Samantha picked it up, if she read it and, if she did, what she’s thinking.
When class ends, I look back at Samantha and find her staring at me but, as soon as our eyes meet, she immediately glances away.
I know I can’t force her trust, and I have no idea what lies my mother has told her, so I get up and leave—giving her the space she needs.
As I head outside and start toward the grassy commons in the middle of campus, I hear her come up behind me.
“Davis!”
Despite her cold tone, I turn around, grateful she is speaking to me.
Her jaw drops. “What the hell happened to your face?”
I rub the bruise on my right cheek. “I needed to vent last night.”
For a second, I see a look of concern in her eyes, but she quickly shakes if off, holding up the note. “What’s the meaning of this?”
“I need you to know I keep my promises.”
“So, you thought throwing a paper airplane at me in class was a good idea?”
I shrug, “I wanted to get your attention without being overly aggressive.”
She shakes her head, frowning. “You scare me…”
“Why?” I’m concerned she feels that way.
“You’re either a genuinely nice guy or evil to the core.”
“I’m not a nice guy, but I’m also not a monster, Samantha. What exactly did my mother say to make you feel that way?”
Samantha looks at me with a mixture of fear and distrust, but answers. “She warned me that she suspects you’ve been using my brother’s likeness to gain my trust, and that you have plans to blackmail my family.”
“Why would I do that?” I ask incredulously.
“She told me you’re broke and that you’ll do anything for money.”
I snort in disgust. “It’s true that I have no money, but she’s the reason why.”
Samantha starts shifting uncomfortably. “Thane, after the things we did at the hotel last night, I can’t help but wonder if your sudden offer to train me was really just a set up for blackmail.”
Leave it to my
mother to trash my reputation and steal something positive in my life. Fuck the Beast, I’m not letting her take this from me, too.
Looking Samantha in the eyes, I tell her in no uncertain terms, “I would never do such a thing.”
I know the accusation my mother leveled against me is seriously messing with her head, so I ask the only question that can cut through all the lies. “What does your gut tell you, Samantha?”
She takes a deep breath before meeting my gaze again. “I trust you….” I can see that she sincerely wants to trust me, but my similarity to her brother is making her doubt her feelings now, after hearing my mother’s accusation.
The Beast’s deception is brilliant and cruel.
The guilt I feel for not being able to protect Samantha from that woman’s influence eats at me. “I’m sorry you’ve become involved.”
“Thane, can you tell me why a mother would say such horrible things about her own son?”
“My mother has an agenda. I don’t know what it is this time,” I growl under my breath, “but she always has an agenda and is thorough in her execution. I suspect that once she identified who you were, she investigated you so she not only knew about your brother’s death, but my likeness to him. She then weaved a story around it that would leave you open to that vicious lie.”
“Oh, my God, do you think there’s any possibility she knows what we were doing at the hotel last night?” she whispers, a look of horror on her face.
“No, she was interrogating my friend Anderson at the time.”
I’m grateful that I had decided to take a cab and hadn’t registered under our real names at the hotel. It seems my general distrust of people is an asset in this particular instance.
Samantha closes her eyes, breathing a sigh of relief.
I pull out the restraining order I’ve been carrying since discovering the Beast was back. “I mistakenly believed this would be enough to stop her, but it’s useless if she goes after the people around me.”
Samantha takes the paper from me and unfolds it. “You actually have a restraining order against your mother?” As she reads it, I see a distinct change come over her. Samantha looks up at me afterward, her eyes flashing with anger.
“Your mother is a total psycho.”
“Yes.”
“So, let me get this straight. She fucked with me last night, just to fuck with you? That bitch needs be stopped.”
“I couldn’t agree more.”
Grateful my friendship with Samantha remains strong, I wait for Anderson to return, but I know that with each day that passes there’s a chance my mother is poisoning him with more lies.
A few days later, I’m relieved to hear from the guys at the dorm that Anderson has been looking for me. When I finally spot him outside the library, I call out his name. He turns and comes barreling toward me with a menacing look on his face. I prepare myself to be socked in the face but, when he reaches me, instead of a punch, he crushes me in a bear hug.
Squeezing the air out of me like a boa constrictor, he whispers gruffly, “I saw her again.”
I tense, wondering what the next few seconds hold for me.
When he lets go, Anderson looks at me with pity. “You’re so fucked.”
“What do you mean?”
“That woman is certifiable.”
I let out an inward sigh of relief, knowing he’s on my side. “Yes, she absolutely is.”
He growls ominously, “She had the nerve to approach me again. She said she felt compelled to share the secret she’s been keeping to protect you.”
“What secret?”
He glances around before saying under his breath, “Your dear old mom claims you shot your father but she made it look like a suicide to protect you.”
The blood drains from my face. Her lie is beyond anything I could ever imagine.
Anderson continues, “She must have sensed I was teetering on the fence about you, and thought she needed to implicate you further.”
Knowing how he and I left it the last time we talked, I ask, “Why didn’t you believe her this time?”
He runs his hand through his hair. “It makes no sense. Why would a kid kill his dad for fucking another woman? Scream at him, and punch the crap out of him, I get. But there’s no reason a kid would go so far as to kill the guy. Maybe the mom, but the kid? No way.”
He looks at me with concern. “When I called her on it, she started crying.” He shakes his head. “Damn, that woman can cry.” Spitting on the ground in disgust, he tells me, “She then decides to tell me the real truth. Between her exaggerated sobs, she shared how your father abused you both for years.”
I grab onto the bike rail beside me, needing its support. Her lies about him stab me in the heart.
After my father’s suicide, she completely trashed his reputation by leaking to the media that he’d been having multiple affairs. In a matter of weeks, the world went from mourning the death of the great violinist, Alonzo Davis, to hating him for being a manwhore because of my mother’s vicious lies.
I will never forgive her for that.
“I’m worried about you, man. What if she tells that crap to the police?”
I pull the restraining order out of my pocket and show it to him. “Pretty sure the cops won’t listen to her.”
He shakes his head in disbelief. “So, you really do have one…” Anderson looks it over, frowning. “Why didn’t you tell me the truth about your mother before all this happened?”
I let out a long sigh. “I suffered through a living hell after my father’s death. People are so quick to believe the lies reported in the news…” I turn away from him, trying to regain control of my raging emotions. “I wasn’t willing to deal with it again.”
He slugs me in the arm. “Well, I forgive you for keeping me in the dark about her, and I hope you can forgive me for the shit that went down between us.”
I turn around to face him. “There’s nothing to forgive.” I slug him back, grateful we have restored our trust in one another. I vow never to compromise it again.
“Hey, Davis.”
“Yeah?”
“Let’s bring the Beast down.”
Because Rytsar easily saw through her ruse, and Anderson let her know he’s no longer buying her crap, I ask Samantha if she will act as my decoy.
“Sure, I’d love to get even with her. What do you need me to do?”
“It’s a given my mother will be seeking you out now that she’s made contact. She’s been strategic about stalking me without breaking the restraining order. However, I have a plan to work around that…”
What the Beast fails to realize is that I am her son, and I can be equally ruthless when threatened.
Going Down
It upsets Samantha to no end that my mother used her. “What’s wrong with me?”
“Don’t beat yourself up over it, Samantha. The Beast had the element of surprise and utilized it to her full advantage after pumping information out of Anderson.”
“But Thane, I’m not a gullible person. I don’t trust people, in general. And yet, that woman was able to make me question everything about you, and I’d never even met her before. Hell, she could have been anybody.” Samantha looks at me sadly, as she takes a sip of her coffee. “You didn’t deserve that.”
“Fortunately, I understand how she operates, so I’m not offended. I just wish I’d been able to protect you from her. The Beast is extremely skillful at tapping into a person’s insecurities. I’m relieved that, due to my own distrust of people, she had no chance of trailing us to the hotel that night. If she had, there’s no telling what she would have done after seeing you and glee enter the hotel room with me. The woman is unscrupulous, and she doesn’t care who she hurts in the process.”
The possibility of glee getting caught up in all of this, even after everything she’s done for me, is infuriating. I can’t let another soul suffer because of my mother.
I can’t.
“What do you think
she wants from you?” Samantha asks.
“Other than to torture me?” I laugh miserably. “I’m not sure. But she was strategic, attacking those closest to me, so it’s obvious she wants to strip away my defenses before she strikes her final blow.”
Samantha shudders. “It’s hard to believe you’re related to her. The two of you are complete opposites.”
I say nothing because she’s wrong. I’m quite capable of following in my mother’s footsteps. I read people well, but rather than tear them down, I’m determined to help them grow.
It’s part of the reason I’m so determined to train Samantha.
“Since my mother must be caught within a hundred yards of me for the police to enforce the restraining order, I’ll need you to act as the bait to draw her in.”
“Not a problem. I’ll do anything to help.”
I warn her, “This could be dangerous, Samantha. There’s no telling what my mother might do.”
“Are you afraid she’ll become violent?”
“I plan to provoke her, so I’m prepared for it. And that’s why you must promise not to step in, no matter what happens.”
Samantha huffs. “Thane, I’m more than capable of defending myself.”
“I agree but, for this plan to work, you can’t get involved. You’re only there to reel her in.”
I don’t say it out loud, but I am willing to die to protect her if things go south.
Several days later, the Beast contacts her and Samantha dutifully plays the tearful, helpless woman to get her to agree to meet off campus. With the place and time set, Anderson and Durov join me to scope out the area and finalize our plans.
I’ve purposely kept Samantha in the dark so she won’t be implicated, should my mission fail. The less she knows, the better—she’s taking a big enough risk for me.
“Durov, Samantha’s safety is our first priority. No matter how this goes down, I want you to stay focused on protecting her.”