by Renee Rose
Out-of-body Caitlin watches them stumble out. I’m so fucking numb. So removed. Vaguely, it occurs to me that I need to get back. And Paolo’s here.
He knows how to do it.
He turns to me, his face etched with concern. I pick up his meaty hand and put it on my throat, pressing in to squeeze.
Choke me. My silent plea.
He understands. He cups the back of my head and leans his lips down to my temple. “I would, doll, but I think your brother will shoot me.”
Observer Caitlin notes Trevor still gripping Paolo’s pistol. “Put the gun down,” I hear myself say.
I don’t feel the relief I know I should when he starts and sets it down on the coffee table like it’s a snake.
There’s something else. Something I need. Oh yeah.
“I’m hungry,” I force the words across my lips.
Paolo sweeps the kitchen with his gaze, then shakes his head. “Let’s get you out of here.” He scoops me into his arms. “We passed a lodge not too far from here. We can get a meal and stay there until the storm passes.”
I see Trevor’s pale face as Paolo turns with me. How did he get here? Oh yeah, he showed up with Paolo.
How did Paolo get here?
“Do I need to shut the water off, Caitie?” Trevor asks.
The water… I can’t figure out what that means.
“I’ll get it. Be out in a minute,” he tells Paolo.
Paolo carries me to a shiny Range Rover and carefully sits me in the passenger seat. He pulls the seatbelt across my waist and buckles it.
I need to tell him things. Lots of things.
I make my tongue work. “They showed me pictures. The FBI. Pictures of you and him. They told me you killed him.”
Pain flickers on Paolo’s face.
“I didn’t believe them.” There. That’s what I wanted to tell him.
He catches my gaze and holds it. “I will never lie to you, Cait.”
And the strangest thing happens.
I drop back into my body for a moment. Warmth spreads across my chest. I find my way back to the present through love, not pain.
As I start to recede again, I reach for more. “I love you,” I blurt.
It’s not my declaration, but what I see on Paolo’s face that brings me back this time. Tears pop into his eyes—I swear to God. He blinks rapidly and lunges in for me. Captures my head in both his hands and holds me captive for a searing kiss.
A claiming kiss. His lips move brutally across mine, his tongue lashes my mouth. He pours all his powerful presence, his life force, his protection into me.
The warmth spreads more. Into my belly. Down my arms. Pooling in my pelvis.
When he pulls away, I’m back. I’m sitting on the car seat, freezing my ass off while my huge, handsome lover stands over me.
“They want me to turn informant.” I have to get the worst of it out. Make sure he knows and understands I would never betray him. “They say I have forty-eight hours to decide or they’ll bring charges against me.”
He shakes his head. “They’re bluffing, doll. But if they do, we’ll handle it. We have Lucy in our court and she’s the very best defense attorney there is. I’m not going to let you go to jail again. Not ever. Lo prometo.”
I don’t understand Italian, but he’d translated the phrase for me before. It was his promise, his solemn vow.
He strokes his thumb down my cheek. “Is that why you ran?” His expression is so tender—no anger or hardness at all.
I’m surprised by a tear falling. No pain. No punishment. I’m feeling feelings just like that.
“Or was it because of this?” He holds up the pregnancy test.
“Yeah. Both,” I croak.
“Talk to me, bella. Why did you run? You scared of me?”
“I just—” I shiver and he reaches across me to put the key in the ignition and start the vehicle.
“Yes, I got scared. Confused. I didn’t know what I wanted. And I didn’t think you’d want the baby—you told me you never wanted kids. And I didn’t know what I would do if you didn’t. I don’t know you well enough, Paolo. Would you force me into something? To abort it? Or if I kept it, would you call all the shots?”
I usually can’t read him at all, but I’m sure it’s grief that makes Paolo close his eyes and his shoulders sag.
“Fuck!” He balls his fists and shouts up to the sky. He thumps his forehead on the frame of the Range Rover.
Trevor appears behind him, but Paolo stays him with an outstretched finger. He doesn’t look from my face, though.
“I will never force you. And I know I have. I got you put in jail and I’m sorry for that—it was a mistake. I’ll make it up to you.
“Caitlin, I’m sorry you don’t know me well enough to feel safe. I’m shit at showing my feelings or even sharing my thoughts. But this is all you need to know: I’m your man. I may talk tough. I know I am tough. I like to be in charge and tell you how things are going to go. But bottom line, I’m your man. That means I have your back. I’m gonna protect you and make sure you’re happy, no matter what. So ultimately, doll? You call the shots. I’m gonna show up for you however you want. If you want to keep this baby, I will be the best fucking dad you could dream of. If you decide you can’t deal, I’ll be by your side through that, too. It’s your body, your life. You get to decide.”
Fresh tears drip down my cheeks. I’m utterly demolished by his words. No one’s ever showed up for me like this before. I’ve never had anyone I could count on except myself.
“I love you,” I whisper. The words are new to say. Each time lights a flame behind Paolo’s eyes.
I get a repeat of the kiss he gave me before, but shorter this time because I shiver.
“Let’s get out of here before we get snowed in.” He waves to Trevor and they both pile in the car.
When we reach the state highway, we pass my dad’s truck, stuck in the snow. Paolo drives by without comment. Neither Trevor nor I say a word.
He left us to fend for ourselves when we had no way to protect ourselves. He can find his own way out of his messes.
Paolo
A hot meal and the warm lodge does everybody good. Caitlin’s color returns and she gets a little life back in her. No one says much of anything until our plates are empty. Then Trevor puts down his fork and looks at Caitlin. “What the fuck.”
“I know, right?”
“Did you know he was alive?”
“Of course not,” Caitlin sputters.
“Was he at the cabin when you got there?” Trevor asks.
Caitlin shakes her head. “He showed up today, just a few minutes before you guys did. He had the nerve to ask me what I was doing there.”
“You’ve gotta be kidding me. And then he held a gun to your head.”
They both stare at each other for a moment as if shocked anew by what went down. “And my first thought was to protect Dad. I thought maybe this was all just his elaborate scheme to draw Dad out and kill him.” He tips his head in my direction. “Sorry, man.”
“No hard feelings. How’s the wrist?”
He pulls back his sleeve and reveals a bruise blooming on his pale skin.
Caitlin gasps. “What did you do?”
“I went for his gun.” Trevor rubs his wrist. “It’s fine. Thanks for not killing me.”
I sit back in my chair. “You have immunity.”
Caitlin’s eyes go soft and warm on me and it does something crazy to my chest. It tightens and expands it at the same time.
This woman… the things she does to me. Over the course of the last twenty-four hours I’ve been to hell and back thinking I might be losing her. I still don’t know if I’ve won her over yet.
“Did you know, Paolo? What was the thing you said about the Russians?” Caitlin asks.
“Yeah, I suspected. I’ve been asking around. Before your dad supposedly was killed by my family, he screwed over the Russians. Stole a semi-truck full of electronics he was supposed to fence for th
em. They stopped looking for him when they heard we killed him. And since I knew we didn’t do it, I figured it was a well-laid plan to disappear with a couple hundred grand. I just don’t understand how a man could leave his two kids behind with no one to take care of them.”
“And I stole from you thinking I was balancing the scales.” Caitlin winces. “Sorry, big man.”
I shake my head. “I’m not sorry,” I tell her. “Shaking you down is the highlight in my long and illustrious career as the family enforcer.”
Trevor cringes. “I’m sure I don’t want to know how that went down.”
“Nope, you don’t.” I toss some cash on the table and stand. “Now I’m gonna steal your sister for a while.” I take Caitlin’s hand and help her to stand. She weaves her fingers through mine. “We’ll meet you back here for a late dinner.”
“Yep. See you later. Have fun.”
Caitlin
“I need a shower,” I declare the minute we’re in the suite. If Paolo’s going to exercise his rights to my body, I need to get clean.
The suite’s gorgeous—rustic in design but with all the amenities, including a gas fireplace, which Paolo promptly fires up.
I head into the bathroom and strip off my clothes.
Paolo’s right behind me. When he climbs into the shower I feel suddenly shy. Exposed. Vulnerable. Like this is the first time we’ve been naked together instead of the twenty-seventh.
Maybe it’s because so much has changed between us. I’m not looking at Paolo as a play partner or a sex partner. I’m not viewing this as a sugar daddy situation or something more coercive than that.
We’re talking about love now.
About two people who made a baby together. Who are angling for spending their lives together.
My breath quickens as he steps into me, crowding me back against the cool tile. He picks up the soap and rolls it in his palm, his eyes never leaving my face.
“Are we good?”
His gaze is magnetic. I nod, drawn into the intensity of his regard. He strokes across my collarbone, spreading the soap he gathered in his palm. He traces down my arm. Underneath it. Across my breast, stopping to strum my nipple with his thumb. Every touch is reverential. Honoring. Like I’m a goddess and he’s worshipping at my altar.
The trembling starts in my knees, but it spreads through my core, my belly, down my arms. I keep expecting him to turn savage, to throw me up against the tile and fuck me hard, but he never does. He soaps my entire body, every inch, every crevice, until I’m clean. Then he turns off the spray and steps out.
He wraps a towel around me and uses the two ends to pull me up against his burly body for a kiss. I kiss him back like it’s our first kiss. Like it’s our first date and I’m just learning to taste him.
We built our romance backward—starting with his belt across my ass and zip tie bondage. Ending—no, not ending, but arriving here. Me trembling before him. Finally ready to give myself.
Not my body, but my whole self. My heart. My trust. My life to him.
He dries me off, stopping to kiss me again and again. Then walks me backward until I hit the bed. Even there, he remains gentle, lifting me to place me on my back before climbing over me.
He dips his head to suckle one nipple as he toys with the other. They’re both sensitive from the hormones, and I feel the answering tug in my core almost immediately.
I arch on the bed. “Paolo.”
He rubs the head of his cock between my legs, and I spread them and lift my hips to take him in. He plunges deep.
“Look at me.” His command penetrates straight into my bones.
I lift my eyes to meet his. I hadn’t realized I wasn’t looking, but now that our gazes lock, I squirm at the vulnerability. Of being so very bared to him as he rocks slowly into me.
“I know you don’t like it basic, but this is what you’re getting.”
There’s my tough guy.
Swoon.
“Who’s gonna make you come like a porn princess?”
I smile. “You are.”
“That’s right.” He plunges even deeper, but his strokes remain smooth. No slamming home or pounding. “Who’s going to take care of you for the rest of your life?”
I nearly crack open at that. I can’t bear how raw those words make me feel, so I sit up to wrap my arms around his neck. To bury my face there.
He puts his hand around my throat and pushes me back down to the bed. “Look at me.” Now his true nature starts showing itself. He rocks in harder, more insistently. “Who, doll?”
“You are?” I whisper, lips trembling.
“That’s right. Even from the fucking grave. I’m your man, bella. I’m gonna take care of you.”
His words imprint onto my soul, and I’m utterly humbled by them. I feel undeserving of such devotion. “Why me?”
He just smiles. “You’re my wildfire. You’re you. That’s all it is. You’re the woman for me. I knew you were special from the first time I saw your photo. Before I even showed up at your place. But I was unprepared for how much of an effect you’d have on me. How much you’d change me. I’m yours, doll. This is it for me. And I’m gonna keep working until you believe in me. Until you trust what we have.”
Tears spill from my eyes. “I believe. I totally believe. I just don’t know how I got so lucky,” I choke.
Paolo strokes his thumb across my lower lip. “I’m the lucky one.” He pulls one of my knees up to my chest to change the angle of entry and picks up his pace.
I drag my lip between my teeth, savoring the sensations, reveling in the confident way he handles me and my body. Even if he’s not rough, he’s always dominant.
“Look at me.”
I find his eyes again. “No more running.”
“I won’t. I promise.”
He pushes me to my belly and enters from behind. Now he finally gives it to me the way I like it, pinning my arms behind my back and holding my elbows as he rides me. “Come, little hacker,” he commands when he gets close.
“You first,” I say.
He fucks me hard, slapping his loins against my ass until I can’t help but come, and as soon as I do, he finishes, shoving deep and staying there while I tighten around him.
He eases his hold on my arms and lowers himself over my body. His lips find my neck. His teeth nip me.
Aftershocks ripple through me, and I squeeze his cock until I force it out.
“I love you.” I like saying it. I like what those words to do my chest. How they reverberate in my body. The effect they have on him.
He bites me hard. He doesn’t like to say it back. He hasn’t. But I don’t care. He shows me. Like his sister said—his actions speak for him.
He drops to his side. “Look at me.”
I turn my head to face him.
He looks me right in the eyes. “I love you.”
There’s a promise there. An oath. A swearing. I feel the words right down to my toes. In my core. In my cells.
He strokes his hand over my ass and the backs of my legs, a gentle exploring. “I’m gonna punish you for running,” he rumbles.
My grin is ear-wide. “Promise?”
He squeezes my ass roughly.
“Thank God. I was afraid you were going to treat me like a delicate flower now that I’m pregnant.”
He strokes my temple. “I might. I might do whatever the fuck I like with you.”
My smile widens. “There he is.”
He gives me one of those rare smiles.
“Paolo?”
His brow quirks.
“Do you want to be a dad?” I ask.
He opens his mouth, then shuts it. Then opens it again. “I want whatever you do. I mean it.”
“No, really. I want to know.” I realize he’s not going to tell me one way or the other. If he’s decided being my man means supporting me with whatever I choose, he won’t want to sway me. “Just tell me the truth. What was your first thought when you saw the pee stick?�
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“Well, I was scared as shit because you were missing, doll. And I was just focused on what the news meant to you. But now that you’re here… I’m really fucking excited about the idea. I never thought I wanted kids, but that’s because I was never in love before. I mean the idea of multiplying you? Have more little Caitlins running around?” He hits his fist to his chest like he can’t even speak he’s so overcome.
My vision blurs. “Yeah?” I give a watery laugh. “What if they’re little Paolos?”
“Well, the poor bastards would be as lucky as I am to get to live with you.”
“Are we living together now?”
“Fuck, yes, we’re living together. Are we having this baby?”
“Yes.” Tears drip down my face. “Yes, I want to. But I don’t want to quit school or dance cardio or anything. I don’t know, I guess I want it all.”
“Then you’ll have it all.” Paolo pushes me to my side and snugs me up against him, face to face. “I’ll handle it.”
The tears fall harder. Explosions of celebrations go off in my chest. “Yeah? We’re going to do this? We’re having this baby?”
Paolo kisses me. “I’m having you,” he says firmly. “And yeah, we’re having a baby.” After a moment, he says, “Don’t freak out when I move you again.”
“Isn’t it too soon? What if I lose the baby? Twenty percent of pregnancies end in miscarriage.”
Paolo goes still, like he’s never contemplated that possibility. Then he answers with total Paolo confidence, “If that happens, I’ll knock you up again, doll. I’m having this family.”
He tips my chin up. “You worried I’m too old? I meant it when I said I’ll take care of you from the grave. No one will ever touch you. You’ll be provided for. You become a Tacone, you’ll have my family behind you for life.”
“Are you proposing?”
He goes still again. “You’re mine. But, yes, I am going to put a ring on that finger. Are you ready to say yes?”
I laugh and roll to my back. It seems huge, but also, it’s nothing. I’ve already accepted I’m his. And I knew that meant every part of me, because this man doesn’t half-ass anything.
“Maybe,” I murmur.