‘You may use our upstairs guest room,’ the doctor went on. ‘Rest and refresh yourself and I’ll discuss the situation with Galena when she returns.’
‘Is Galena your wife?’ I asked.
‘I never married and I have no children,’ he answered. ‘Galena runs my house and everyone must obey her rules. Apart from Stefan,’ he added, ‘who is completely spoiled – for when he was a small boy she punished his disobedience by only pretending to strike him … with a feather duster.’
‘So Stefan is not your son?’
‘No – not of the blood anyway. I met him years ago under … difficult … circumstances. He lives on the attic floor and I am sponsoring his studies in medicine. You will meet him again tonight at dinner.’
Chapter 7
I had wrapped my Siberian shawl around my body and was resting on top of the bedcovers when Galena came to the guest room to speak to me.
She was a sturdy woman with a direct manner. ‘I would have expected a pretty girl of your age to be betrothed.’
‘No one I met appealed to me.’
She raised her eyebrows. ‘These matters are usually decided by the girl’s father.’
‘My father said I should marry whom I please.’
‘That is … unusual.’
‘In any case,’ I added, ‘no young man ever showed much interest in me.’
Galena laughed out loud. ‘You have an honest way with words. But I imagine that in the countryside the young men have gone to war?’
‘There is also the fact that I have no dowry. Who would want a pauper wife?’
‘Dr K mentioned an older man, a lawyer, who has proposed to you?’
I shuddered.
‘Ah …’ she said. ‘Is that the way of it?’
I was conscious that she was assessing me as we chatted and I sensed that she respected openness and plain speaking. ‘I cannot bear him near me,’ I replied. ‘He is greedy and domineering and would destroy my spirit.’
Galena nodded slowly. ‘We cannot allow that to happen to the child of an old friend. I will remind Dr K that, as your godfather, he has a duty of care. Nina, you may live in this room in this house for as long as you want. One morning a week, in the shed at the foot of the garden, Dr K and Stefan, our medical student, treat patients who can’t afford to pay to see a doctor. Tomorrow is clinic day so you’ll see for yourself how busy we are.’ She paused. ‘Be aware too that the city is becoming more unruly. You must be mindful not to get caught up in any disturbance on the streets.’
‘I will be careful,’ I promised her.
Galena gave a rueful sigh. ‘You will be as careful as any of us were at your age – which is not at all.’
Relief washed through me and I might have hugged her, but she was already on her way out of the door. I was left to hug myself. And so I rearranged my shawl to tie the ends like a belt around my waist – and immediately felt more secure than I had for many days. The room was smaller than my own at home and the window view was to the rear of the house, but I would have happily slept in a cupboard to avoid marrying that lawyer. I put my travel bag on the bed and unpacked my belongings. At the bottom, nestled among Papa’s story pamphlets, was the carved wooden casket.
I don’t know what made me take the chain from around my neck and insert the key into the lock again. I only know that, when I laid my eyes upon it, the dagger drew me like a magnet. The ruby absorbed light into its heart and seemed to grow larger. Fighting my fear, I reached out to it. No visions came to disrupt my mind. All was as it should be. And yet … not quite – the jewel was warm under my touch. Obeying an inner urge, I lifted the dagger and tucked it in amongst the folds of the shawl gathered at my waist. I swung round to see myself in the dressing-table mirror.
‘Oh!’
The Nina who looked back at me was taller, straighter, different … A ray of light from the ruby reflected in her eyes and a strength grew within me. I thought that, were Viktor Ilyich to stand in front of me now, tarnishing my honour and defiling my father’s name, I would grasp this dagger and plunge it deep into his wicked heart.
The dagger was in my hand!
With a cry I flung it from me onto the bedcovers and stood, panting.
The dinner gong sounded through the house. I fumbled the dagger into the casket, locked it and put it away in my travel bag. With it gone, the mood left me as quickly as it came. But it was some minutes before I was composed enough to go downstairs.
To my surprise, at dinner Galena seated herself at the opposite end of the table to the doctor. Dmitri, our steward in Siberia, was a single man who, from boyhood, had dedicated his life to me and Papa, but he would never have eaten with us.
I sat opposite the medical student, Stefan. He was several years older than me and would have been attractive in a darkly handsome way were it not that his features seemed drawn in a perpetual scowl.
‘I don’t want to be a burden to the household,’ I said as we sat down to eat. ‘Please let me be useful in any way I can.’
‘Have you ever worked before?’ Stefan asked abruptly.
‘I have not.’ I bit back a sharper reply, for the tone of his voice verged on a sneer. ‘But I can, and will, learn to do so.’
Stefan turned his eyes towards heaven.
Dr Konstantin flicked a glance at him but spoke to me. ‘I’ve missed so much of your personal history, Nina. Tell us what’s been happening in your life since we last met?’
‘You know that my mother died as I was born.’ I made the sign of the cross. ‘By the grace of God she and my father are now reunited for eternity.’
Stefan cleared his throat but Dr Konstantin silenced him with a look.
‘My father indulged me. I was constantly in his company. From an early age I sat with him at table and he taught me to ride my horse and lots of other things.’
‘And as you grew older? How did you spend your time?’
‘Mainly helping Papa. I minded the lawyer’s children while he conducted the estate business with my father. But Papa left as much of that work as he could to this lawyer, for he was more interested in researching native cultures.’
‘It was his focus,’ the doctor agreed. ‘He studied language and literature at university and at one time was destined to gain a professorship in that subject.’
‘I travelled with Papa through the countryside as he collected songs and tales from the villagers. When we got home I’d transcribe his notes and we’d write up the stories.’
‘You can read and write?’
‘Of course I can read and write!’
‘Tush! I did not mean to offend you. It is a scandal that so many women cannot. If you mix in the elite society of Petrograd, you will find elegant women who are able to sing or dance to perfection yet cannot read or write.’
‘They at least have the opportunity to learn,’ muttered Stefan. ‘The peasants are not given even a basic education.’
‘Some peasants are.’ I was thinking of how my father had taught lessons to the children of our workers. ‘But, apart from learning skills to fulfil their function in life, it is not necessary for them to have an education – neither men nor women.’
‘Such snobbery!’ Stefan spluttered on a mouthful of cabbage.
‘What?’ I looked from one to the other. ‘Is there something wrong with what I said?’
Dr Konstantin pressed his lips together as if he was trying not to laugh. ‘Why do you think that peasants shouldn’t be educated?’
‘Yes, Lady Nina.’ Stefan’s eyes glittered with fury. ‘Please share your insights into the life of a peasant or a worker. Do tell us why you think they should not learn to read or write.’
‘I didn’t say that they should not,’ I replied. ‘I said that it was not necessary for them to be educated in order to do their daily tasks. I have no moral objection to everyone being educated.’
‘Oh well, that’s all right then,’ Stefan said sarcastically. ‘Perhaps you might like to share your thoughts
on that matter with our government ministers?’
I stared at this angry young man. Why was he so hostile?
Dr Konstantin pointed his fork at me. ‘Your turn, I think.’
‘Given the opportunity,’ I said, ‘I would share my opinion with the Tsar himself.’
‘Unfortunately that won’t be possible,’ said Dr Konstantin. ‘His Imperial Majesty has chosen to stay away from the city to be nearer the Front and show leadership to the troops.’
‘He might return later in the summer,’ said Galena, ‘for there will be festivities to mark the day his son becomes a man. In August the Tsarevich Alexei will be twelve years old.’
‘It will be a crime if the Romanovs spend money on fripperies with the country in the state it is.’ Stefan seemed to throw this out as a challenge to test my opinion.
‘Can a father not have a party for his son’s birthday?’ I countered his remark with a question. This forward young man had beaten me into submission at the front door, but I would let him see that I was as capable as he was to take part in a debate.
‘Well said, Nina!’ Galena exclaimed. ‘Stefan can acknowledge no good in the Romanov family. But my grandfather was a serf; he owed his freedom to Tsar Nicholas’s grandfather, who liberated the peasants and gave them citizenship. Without such leadership my family would still be slaves of the landowners. Russia needs the Romanovs to curb the power of those who would exploit us.’
‘But those initial changes weren’t followed through,’ said Stefan. ‘Russians are citizens with no voice. Tsar Nicholas – or, rather, his wife now – chooses our government ministers.’
‘There is a reason for that,’ said Galena.
‘As a young man Tsar Nicholas saw his grandfather die a horrible death when, in the name of civil rights, an assassin blew his legs off with a bomb,’ Dr K explained.
‘It’s understandable then,’ I said, ‘why he is afraid of more reform.’
‘It makes him an incompetent leader,’ said Stefan.
‘But not an incompetent father,’ said Galena. ‘It is fitting that the Tsar should join his family to celebrate his son’s twelfth birthday …’
Chapter 8
While Dr K and Galena and the girl, Nina, continued to talk, I dropped out of the conversation. My mind tracked back to my own twelfth birthday.
I recalled the joy in my heart as my mother and I linked arms with the workers of St Petersburg to bring our petition to the Tsar. I recalled the singing, and the chanting, and the waving flags, and the snow.
The snow …
My mother’s face is inches from my own. She lies with her eyes open. It begins to snow. Flakes settle on her nose and eyelashes. I expect her to wipe them away with her hand. She doesn’t move, so I take off my mitts and do it for her.
‘Mama,’ I whisper.
I wait. Any moment now she’ll blink and start to scold me for running off.
‘Boy! Are you hurt?’
The tall man who’d been beside us in the crowd earlier was standing over me.
I stared up at him.
‘No?’ he said. ‘Good. Stand up and follow me.’
I shook my head.
‘Come away, child.’ He spoke urgently. ‘Quickly now!’
‘I need to help my mama,’ I told him.
The tall man knelt down beside my mother and put his finger to her neck. ‘She has no pulse.’ Gently he closed down her eyelids. ‘I am a doctor and I am sorry to have to tell you this. Your mother is dead.’
For a single second the world stopped. Somewhere inside me I knew that I was denying the evidence of my own eyes. Like a child playing make-believe, I’d been pretending that my mother was still alive.
‘The Cossacks are marshalling their horses for a charge.’ The doctor-man was talking again. ‘They will scythe down what is left of us. A bullet might miss its target. A Cossack wielding a sabre will not.’
‘I won’t let the horsemen ride over my mama.’ I set my chin in determination. ‘She requires a proper burial. With prayers, and, and …’
‘Your mama gave her life that you might own yours. Is this what a son does to his mother? Throws her most precious gift back in her face?’
‘I … I—’
‘What is your name?’ he interrupted me.
‘Stefan,’ I replied. ‘My name is Stefan Petrovich Kolodin.’
‘Take my hand, Stefan Petrovich Kolodin. It is what your mother would have wanted you to do.’
As I stood up I heard the clatter of horses’ hooves. The Cossacks were lining up at the corner of the square. ‘May God save us!’ My voice shook in fright.
‘I doubt if the Almighty will intervene directly, but let’s hope He gave you a good pair of legs for running. You are going to need them when they begin their gallop.’ And saying that, the doctor yanked on my arm so hard as to almost wrench it from its socket and we raced down the Prospekt. ‘Follow the tram lines!’ he yelled at me.
‘The staircase!’ I cried out. ‘To the narrow embankment!’
‘Good thinking!’
All around us people were fleeing. As we reached the steps to the river we saw, running towards us, a group who’d been marching to the Winter Palace from a different part of the city.
‘Soldiers!’ they shouted. ‘Behind us!’
We went towards the cathedral.
‘They have cannon on the steps!’ Another warning cry.
The tall man swore. ‘They are trying to corral us like cattle!’ He dived down a nearby lane. At the end was a stone wall.
We were trapped.
He pulled me into the folds of his coat as uniformed horsemen trotted past the end of the street. ‘Stay quiet.’ Only when the man put his hand over my mouth did I realize that I was sobbing aloud. The Cossacks had almost gone past when one of them swivelled his head and spotted us. With a loud ‘Halloo!’ he alerted his companions and tugged at his horse’s rein. Two or three more turned to join him.
The doctor bent and, lifting me in his arms, he heaved me upwards at the wall. Desperately I flailed out, found a crevice and clambered to the top. A pile of manure was stacked against the other side. A soft landing for me. By releasing my grip I’d tumble to safety.
‘Go on!’ the doctor urged.
‘No!’ I swung my legs to sit astride the wall and reached down to hold out my hand.
‘Stupid boy!’ He glanced behind him. The Cossacks were cramped in the passage. It wasn’t wide enough to allow a full charge but they came steadily onwards.
They had drawn their sabres.
The doctor shed his coat upon the ground, took a few paces back, and raced forward to leap upwards. I grabbed his collar as he scrabbled madly with his hands and feet to the top of the wall and hauled himself over. Together we toppled into the dung heap.
‘How appropriate,’ the doctor commented as he removed a lump of foul-smelling manure from his hair. ‘It is how they treat us – as excrement to be swept from the streets.’
Chapter 9
Leaving the midden heap, we ran through wynds and alleys until we came to a wider street of individual houses. By a side lane we entered the back garden of one of these.
‘Don’t chide me, Galena!’ The doctor addressed the severe-looking housekeeper who opened the door. ‘At least I had the decency to avoid the front entrance.’
‘Because you knew I would not let you in that way to make a mess of the hallway.’ She sniffed. ‘Both of you wait here in the scullery’ – she inspected me with disapproval – ‘while I sort out some clean clothes.’
I wondered at her attitude. Some of Mama’s friends were servants in large houses and they’d never dare speak to their employers in such a manner.
‘I’ll change later.’ The doctor was already scrubbing his hands at the sink. ‘Fetch my medical bag – as fast as you can. The army broke up the procession with rifle fire. I cannot help the dead and the dying, but many more are wounded.’
She put her hand to her mouth. ‘The Tsar
would never give that order. To murder his own people.’
‘Nevertheless, it is happening as we speak. The Cossacks are riding roughshod over them, trampling women and children under their horses’ hooves. I must go out again.’
‘If you are killed the people will have lost a leader.’
‘There is something else I have to do.’ He glanced at me. ‘I want to find this boy’s mother and bring her body home.’ The woman hurried off while the doctor took another coat from the hooks at the scullery door. ‘Look after this young man, Galena,’ he said when the woman returned. ‘Give him hot tea and add two tablespoons of brandy with plenty of brown sugar.’
‘I’ve been your housekeeper long enough to know how to deal with shock,’ the woman said in indignation. ‘Here is your bag. And wear these too.’ She ran an armband up his sleeve. It had a red cross on it, as did the cap she placed on his head. ‘They may give you some protection against murdering Bolsheviks.’
‘Galena, it wasn’t political agitators who did this,’ said the doctor. ‘It was uniformed soldiers.’
‘Get along with you, then.’ She gave him a tiny push. ‘There will be stew and dumplings on the stove when you return.’
It was years since I’d allowed even my mother to see me naked, but I was so distressed that I didn’t protest when Galena stripped and sponged me and helped me into an over-long flannel nightshirt.
She heaved me over her shoulder like a sack of coal and carried me upstairs and put me to bed. Despite the brandy and the sugar and the hot tea, a numbness descended upon me and I lay with eyes wide open, neither speaking nor sleeping. The doctor came in later to listen to my chest with his stethoscope and give me medicine – for the chill had seeped from my heart and head into my lungs. But my jaw locked and I stared out fixedly on a different world. In the darkness beyond the lamplight monsters lurked – misshapen beasts with fangs that dripped blood. They prowled and growled, and I knew that if I closed my eyes they would pounce and tear me to pieces.
The Rasputin Dagger Page 4