“I thought you said that I was getting a crib and that I could get all of the other things from a baby shower?” Shannon took a bite from her steak salad.
“I guess I did go a little crazy, but it’s not every day you become a grand…I mean a…”
“Mom.”
“No, not a mom. I’ve done that. You know what I mean.”
“No, Mom, Mom, my water just broke.”
Danielle set down her fork and froze for a second. Then her thoughts caught up with her voice. “Oh, my God. Oh. Oh, okay. Let’s go. Let’s go!”
The waitress came by as Danielle helped Shannon out of her seat. “Is everything okay?” she asked.
Danielle pulled a hundred dollar bill from her wallet and handed it to the waitress. “Gotta go.”
“But don’t you want the check? I’m sure I owe you change. Was the food bad? Is there a problem?”
“There will be if you don’t move!” Danielle yelled. “My daughter is having a baby.”
The waitress moved quickly out of the way.
Danielle drove like a bat out of hell to the hospital. Shannon called her doctor and was told he would meet her there. “I’m scared,” Shannon said.
“It won’t hurt. That’s why they have drugs.”
“No, Mom. I’m scared I don’t know what the hell I’m doing and that I won’t be a good mother.”
“You’re going to be a great mother. The best mother. I can already tell how much you love this baby. Look how hard you’ve fought for him. Look at what you’ve given up just to get him here? And let me tell you something about being a mother, there are two things you will do over and over again as his parent—you will love him no matter what, through the good and the bad, and you will sacrifice time and again to do what you think is right for him. And, Shannon, you’ve done that already. You will be fantastic at this. I know it.”
“Oh God.”
“Honey. Stop worrying.”
“No. The pain. Oh God. It feels like someone just reached inside me and took my ovaries in a vise. Oh God.” She shut her eyes tightly.
“Okay, okay, we’re almost to the hospital. Breathe.” Danielle tried to remember something useful from her Lamaze class from when Cassie was born, but all she could remember was telling Al to go to hell every time he barked at her to “Breathe!”
“We’re here, babe.”
Danielle pulled up in front of the hospital and helped Shannon get out. She handed the keys to a security guard, and gave him ten bucks.
“What’s this for?”
“To park the car.”
“I can’t park your car. I’m security.”
“Then leave it there.”
“You can’t leave it here.”
She handed him another ten. “Park the damn car! My daughter is having a baby.”
“Mom, you are acting crazy.”
She smiled at the security guard. “Please park the car?”
He shook his head. “Sure. I’ll leave the keys at the front desk.”
“Thank you.”
The nurse in triage took down some notes and then said to Shannon, “You’re sure your water broke?”
Danielle turned Shannon around so the nurse could see her backside. “I don’t know, unless the poor girl peed in her pants, what do you think?”
The nurse looked from Shannon’s rear to Danielle like she was fairly insane, then picked up the phone. “I need a bed.”
Ten hours later, mother and daughter had walked the miracle mile around the hospital a thousand times because Shannon’s contractions had come to a halt and the doctor hoped the activity would get things moving. It was now past ten at night. Danielle’s friends had all called, Shannon’s father had called, and Mark stopped in several times already.
Danielle was now back in bed, tired and more than a little cranky. Cassie popped her head in. “Hey, sis, how’s it going?”
Shannon rolled her eyes and groaned.
Cassie shrugged. “What’s on TV?” She started to grab the remote off of the stand next to Shannon’s bed.
“Don’t you even think about it,” Shannon growled. “That’s my fucking remote control.”
“Sure,” Cassie replied sheepishly and handed it to her sister. She whispered in her mom’s ear. “She turn into the Antichrist, or what?”
“Cassie,” Danielle warned.
Mark came in and motioned for Danielle to come out into the hall with him. “What is it?” she asked.
“I’ve been conferring with Shannon’s doctor and since she’s not dilating, we have to start talking about a c-section. Because her water broke already, we only have a limited amount of time to get the baby out. Do you want one of us to explain this to her or do you want to do it?”
“Maybe the both of us should talk to her. I know she feels comfortable with you. She likes her doctor fine, but I think she really trusts you.”
“Let’s go talk with her.” He put an arm around her.
Danielle nodded.
Shannon wasn’t thrilled with the option but understood why they needed to start considering and preparing for a c-section delivery. Mark told her they could give it a couple of more hours. They could try giving her Pitocin to bring on stronger contractions. Shannon agreed to give that a try. Two hours later, when Shannon was in more pain than Danielle could bear, the doctors stopped the Pitocin. There had been no change.
They made the decision right after midnight to go ahead with the c-section. Danielle called Al to let him know. She was pleased that Cassie had stayed. “It’s been a long night already, kid, you want to go home and get some sleep?” Danielle asked her.
“No way. I’m here for the long haul, Mom.”
“We’ve got a few minutes. Let’s go grab a soda or coffee or something, then.”
Cassie nodded, and Danielle took Shannon’s hand. “Hey, baby, we’re going down to get a bite and a soda out of the vending machine. You okay?”
Shannon nodded, but didn’t look okay. Her eyes reflected the same fear she’d shown when she’d gotten lost in the grocery store when she was five. “Hurry up though,” she said.
“We will, sweetie.”
They walked down to the vending machine where they bought Cokes and a couple of bags of chips. “It ain’t exactly nutritious, but it’ll do.”
“I lied,” Cassie blurted out.
“What do you mean, you lied?” Danielle asked.
“About sex.” She opened the soda and took a sip. “I told you that I had sex with a lot of guys just because I knew it would drive you crazy.”
“Oh, Cass.”
“I’m sorry. I thought you were snooping in my room and so I got mad and I told you that. I haven’t had sex with a bunch of guys. Only one guy. Jordan.”
“Oh.” Jordan had been Cassie’s first real boyfriend two years earlier. They’d dated half of her sophomore year, but he broke her heart when he decided to go to the prom with one of the cheerleaders. Then he’d gone off to college in the fall and Danielle was pretty sure that Cassie hadn’t heard from him again.
“I don’t even take the pill anymore. If you looked at the dates on them, you’d have seen that.” She teared up. “I thought he broke up with me because I was bad at it. It’s not like we did it very many times.”
Danielle pulled her into her arms and hugged her tight. “Guys are jerks.”
Cassie grunted a little laugh. “Mark seems nice.”
“He is nice. He’s really nice.”
Cassie pulled away and wiped her face. “You’re blushing, Mom. You really like him.”
“I do.”
“Cool.”
They started walking back. The fluorescent lighting in the corridor bounced off the stark floors. “Cass, you didn’t do anything wrong with Jordan. He’s just a dumb guy. The best advice I can give you about guys and sex is that it’s really complicated, and no matter how much you think you like or even love a guy, when you throw sex into the mix, it gets even more complicated. On top of that, it’s usually
the girl who winds up the most hurt by it. Women don’t just have sex to feel good physically, and I’m not saying that all guys do, but at your age, that’s more the norm than not. But for girls, we tie in a lot of emotion, and we think that having sex with a guy means love. To a lot of women, especially young women, it means a man will love you back, if you sleep with him. That’s why it’s good to wait. It’s good to wait until you’re old enough and mature enough to understand the consequences on every level.”
Cassie nodded. “I know.”
“Good. I hope so. You’re too damn young, Cass. It’s too much for someone your age. It really is.”
She nodded. “Mom, I’m miserable at Dad’s. Can I please come home?”
Danielle stopped and looked at her. “Do you think you can respect me and my rules? Because, honey, I can’t have you home if you plan to continue talking to me the way you do and walking all over me. I love you, but I can’t have it.”
“I understand. Can you give me another chance? I promise not to blow it.”
“The babies getting to you, huh?”
“You have no idea. But it’s not so much them, even. It’s Stacey. For a long time I thought she was so cool and hip, but she’s a nag. She nags Dad every second he’s around and then she nags me. I don’t have a clue what Dad was thinking.”
Danielle simply agreed. “We better get back to your sister.”
Shannon was prepped, and then Danielle prepped. Cassie waited in the waiting room, and a few minutes later, the anesthesiologist, Shannon’s doctor, and Mark came in. Mark explained the procedure to them both again.
“Mom?”
“Yes, babe?”
Shannon stretched out her free arm and wiggled her hand. Danielle took it and stroked her hair. “I’m proud of you. I am so, so proud of you,” she said, and she meant it. Maybe having this baby would not have been her choice for Shannon, but her daughter had convictions and she’d stuck by them, allowing her faith to lead the way.
She smiled at her.
“Incision has been made,” Mark reported.
Danielle didn’t want to see the cut on her child. Standing at her head and holding her hand was the best place for her. A few minutes later, Shannon’s doctor lifted out a seven-pound baby boy. He held him up. “Here he is.”
Mark looked at Danielle. “Do you want to cut the cord?”
“Yes.” Danielle did so, and then the baby was quickly examined and wrapped up. Vitals were being taken on Shannon as the baby was handed to Danielle.
He was truly beautiful. Not all red and purple like so many newborns. His little eyes were closed tight, and Danielle smiled when a little squawk came from him. She ran her finger over his perfect tiny feet and hands and she instantly fell head over heels, totally in love.
“Can I see him?” Shannon asked.
“In a minute,” a nurse replied.
“Doc. I got a drop on the pressure here,” another nurse said.
Mark took a look.
“I feel dizzy,” Shannon muttered.
Beeps and whistles started going off, and orders were shouted at the staff quickly.
“What’s going on? What’s going on?” Danielle asked.
A nurse took the baby and put him into the incubator. “Let’s get him to the nursery.”
“What is happening?” Danielle demanded again, not able to keep the panic out of her voice.
Mark looked up from where he stood over Shannon, working frantically on her. “Danielle, go with the baby.”
“She’s coding!” the anesthesiologist said.
“Code blue, code blue, 121, code blue 121,” went out over the hospital speakers.
Danielle was pushed out of the way as more hospital staff rifled into the room, each of them doing something to help save her daughter’s life.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
Alyssa
Alyssa stood over Ian’s hospital bed. It would be four weeks before the actual transplant could take place. She’d be traveling back and forth between L.A. and Napa during that time. She knew she was eating up a large chunk from her grandmother’s inheritance, but she couldn’t think of a better way to use it. She was staying at a residential hotel within walking distance of Cedar’s Sinai and, for now, everything in her life besides seeing her son through this was on hold.
His first chemo treatment had been administered that morning and despite it, he seemed in good spirits.
“Thank you for being here with me,” he said.
“I wouldn’t be anywhere else,” she replied.
“My mom was like that, too. I mean my other mom.”
“I know what you mean.” It was the first time that Ian had made an acknowledgment that she was also his mother. “I bet you really miss her. Everyone must miss her.” Alyssa thought about the copy of the photo of Louise and Ian that she kept in her purse. She’d taken to looking at it daily and saying a silent prayer of gratitude to the woman who’d raised Ian, and also asking her to help heal him. She felt a kinship with this woman she’d never known.
“We do. My dad especially. He’s married to his work now, and us kids.”
“Do you have a favorite commercial he’s made over the years?” Alyssa had learned from Charlie that he wrote commercial jingles and Darren produced commercials. They owned their own lucrative business and were not only brothers, but partners, too.
Ian smiled. “Yeah. I like the one where the kid is in the bathtub singing ‘Rubber Ducky.’ You know, the bubble bath commercial, but the kid can’t say rubber ducky. Instead he says wubber yucky.”
“I love that one, too.” They both started laughing and before long it turned into belly laughter. When they’d stopped and Alyssa wiped the tears away, she said, “I would think it’ll really help you out that your dad and uncle are already in the business. With connections and everything.”
“Definitely. I’m super excited about school and writing. I can’t wait to get back. I have to get rid of the crap in my body, but then I’m full speed ahead.”
Alyssa inwardly hoped that would happen for him. He was bright, talented, and so deserving. Why was it that someone like Ian had to be so sick? In the past few weeks, she’d learned a lot about leukemia and bone marrow transplant. The good news was that Ian seemed to be an excellent candidate because his overall health was good and he was a strong young man, but there were also some possible negatives that worried Alyssa, including the cancer coming back or the donation not working.
“I’m writing a script now, you know.”
“You are?”
“It’s a comedy. A caper type. Kind of like The Pink Panther. Love those movies.”
“With Peter Sellers. Yeah, me too. How funny. Those are great. I would have thought you too young for those.”
“No way. My mom loved them, which meant we all had to love them.” He laughed. “You and me have a lot in common. It’s that biology thing, I guess. I wonder if I would have a lot in common with my biological dad.”
Alyssa didn’t say anything.
“I’m sorry. I know you don’t know where he is and what his life is all about. It’s too bad you only knew his first name.”
Alyssa nodded. How could she tell him the truth? How could she not? He had a right to know. Maybe he didn’t have to know the details around how he was conceived? But James had no right to be in Ian’s life. None. Or was she being selfish by not telling Ian? She’d already learned that secrets and skeletons come back to haunt in due time. But shouldn’t Ian know that his sister was the donor? And that in addition to her, he had five other biological siblings? She needed to take a walk, clear her mind, but she didn’t want to alert him that something was wrong.
“Do you like to paint?” she asked.
“No. I’m not much of an artist. Oh wait, I did do some impressive finger-painting back in Kindergarten.” He laughed. “Why?”
“You know I’m into art and I have some paintings that I want you to see when you get out of here.”
�
��What are they of?”
“You’ll have to wait and see.”
“Oh, you gonna be like that. Okay, then, you gonna have to wait to read my script.”
“Deal.”
“What’s a deal?” Darren walked into the room. “Your dad will be by in a bit. He says give him a call if you need anything. So, what’s a deal?” He looked from Alyssa to Ian.
“Alyssa has some special paintings she’s going to show me when I get out of here, but she won’t tell me what they’re of, so I told her she’ll have to wait until then to read my script.”
“Sounds like a good deal to me.” Darren smiled at her. “How are you, kid?”
“Kind of tired now. They give you some of those feel-good drugs along with the chemo, so you don’t start puking right away.”
“Kid has a way with words. What you trying to tell us then, you too tired for a visit?” Darren laughed.
“No way.”
Darren handed him a Target bag. “What’s this?” Darren shrugged.
“Oh, man, thanks.” Ian took out the set of Bourne Identity DVDs. “I love these.”
“I know,” Darren replied. “That’s why I got ’em.”
“You the man.”
“I know. Want to watch one?”
Ian nodded and Darren walked over and put one of the DVDs into the player. A few minutes later Matt Damon’s face flashed across the screen. They all watched the opening scene. Alyssa glanced over from her chair and noticed Ian closing his eyes. She walked over to Ian and placed a hand on his shoulder. His eyes fluttered. “You want to rest?” she asked.
“Maybe.”
Darren stood. “We can come back later and finish watching this with you. You should probably rest up for your dad’s visit. And I’m sure your brothers and sisters will be by throughout the day.”
“Okay. I am kind of tired.”
Darren gave him a hug and Alyssa kissed him on the cheek. They left his hospital room both with a sigh and unspoken emotion between them. “You hanging around or would you like to go grab a bite to eat with me? I finished a big account’s project this morning, so I’m thinking I can take the day off,” he said. “Let him get some rest and we can drive up the coast for some lunch.”
She checked her watch and realized that she hadn’t eaten much that day and it was already after one o’clock.
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