He pushed the door open and heard the gentle beep of medical equipment that monitored Briar's vital signs. The big man lay on his stomach, his back covered in thick white bandages, the sheets draped over his bare backside. A nurse checked his IV and Nicky slept on a chaise in the corner. He stirred when Remy entered, springing to his feet at once.
"Hey," he said in low tones, rushing over to assist Remy who waved him off.
"How long have you been here?" Remy asked, his eyes in Briar's still body. He was breathing, he could see that but he was so still, so quiet that it was unnerving to him.
"Since they brought him in. His wounds had gotten infected. He's on IV antibiotics and medication for the pain, but he's doing okay. He has been asleep for a while. How are you?" He searched Remy's face, his eyes red-rimmed and blood shot.
"I am fine. You look like shit. Why don't you go over to Celeste's room and get some sleep." He touched Nicky's cheek, cupping it in his hand. "You need rest just like the rest of us," he said.
"Have you heard anything?" Nicky pressed. Remy shook his head. They had no idea where Celeste had gone. Lilith was no help, refusing to speak to anyone until she was before the Council. Karim, who'd moved into an apartment in the Collective, was working with the other members and Nyx to locate Celeste. He wasn't doing well either, as far as Remy knew, his guilt was eating away at him. Remy understood that better than the others, which was why Karim had confided in him.
Briar stirred and Remy's eyes moved back to his prone form on his bed. Nicky gave his shoulder a squeeze on his way out, signaling the nurse to follow him.
Remy eased closer, so he could get a better look at his lover. Briar's face was still battered, the bruises fading from deep purple to a sickly green and yellow. He had his hand under one bruised cheek, his lips slightly parted, a gentle snore escaping with each exhale. Remy couldn't help but smile, before easing next to him in bed. He lay on his side, looking at him when one bright emerald green eye drifted open. He smiled, his hand stroking the ratty beard Remy sported.
"There's my beautiful boy," Briar said in a whisper, his voice hoarse and slurred from lack of use and the high doses of pain medication needed for a Lycan. Especially a Lycan of Briar's size.
"Hey baby. I didn't mean to wake you." Remy moved closer but careful not to disturb him too much.
"I'm glad you did. I'm so happy to see you, baby." He ran his fingers through Remy's thick dark curls and smiled sleepily. "If your hair were longer, you'd look just like you did the first time I ever laid eyes on you. I fell in love with you that day, I think,” Briar said and tears filled Remy's eyes. He leaned closer, capturing Briar's lips with his own. Savoring the feel of his mouth, the taste of him and he reveled in it. How he had missed him. He pulled away and rested his forehead against Briar's, sniffing back tears.
"I missed you so much. I thought about you every single day," Remy said.
Briar cupped his cheek in his hand, his thumb wiping away Remy's tears. He kissed his cheek and winced as pain moved through him.
"Are you okay? Do you need anything? “Remy sat up, ready to spring into action. Briar smiled, shaking his head and placing a hand on Remy's thigh, stopping him. He shook his head, coaxing Remy back into bed, pulling him closer so he could kiss him again, his hand resting on Remy's t-shirt clad chest.
"All I need is you, baby," he said. Remy moved closer, sharing his pillow, breathing his air.
"I'm sorry," Remy started and Briar closed his eyes shaking his head.
"No, I already told you, álainn, this was not your fault. This was all Lilith. I would never blame you for what happened."
Remy closed his eyes and smiled, the sting of his words cutting through him. Of course it was his fault, because if he hadn't gotten involved with Remy, Lilith would have had no reason to torture him. She would have never noticed Briar and he would have been safe, his body still intact. Instead, Remy had pushed her over the edge and she had taken it out on Briar. His beautiful, gentle Briar.
"You deserve so much better than me," Remy whispered.
Briar laughed softly and kissed Remy's nose. "There is no one better than you, Remy. Not for me, you're it. All I ever wanted." He yawned, his eyes drifting shut. Remy began to ease off of the bed, but Briar caught his arm, his eyes opened.
"Where are you going?” he asked.
"I'm going to let you get your rest."
Briar shook his head, linking his fingers withe Remy's. "No, stay." Briar yawned again.
"Okay. Whatever you want," Remy sighed, smiling and snuggling close to the immobile giant.
"I want ..." Briar let his hand drift down to the drawstring of Remy's pajama bottoms, waggling his eyebrows. "What I want I can't have right now, so just stay. I want to keep you close, feel you beside me. I miss this." He draped an arm around Remy's waist, pulling him as close as possible without injuring either of them. Briar smiled, drifting back into a drug induced sleep, gently snoring against Remy's hair. Remy watched him, staring into Briar's face, running his hand over his bare, muscled arms and sighed. He didn't know what he'd done to deserve such unconditional, unwavering love from this man, but he knew that he wasn't worthy of it. Not just yet, maybe not ever.
"You do deserve better," he whispered, before his own eyes drifted shut.
***
Nicky couldn't sleep, not in this room that smelled so much like lavender and vanilla, so much like Celeste. He hadn't even taken off his jeans and t-shirt and lay atop the covers. Even though there were industrial sized generators purring somewhere beneath the house pushing cool air and light throughout the house, he couldn't get comfortable. He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling and prayed that she was okay, that she was safe. Whenever he closed his eyes, he saw her sprawled on a bathroom floor somewhere, bleeding out and welcoming death the same way he'd found Remy. The thought of that made his stomach hurt. Remy was the strongest person he'd ever known and for him to break like that was frightening. What chance did someone as fragile as Celeste stand? She was physically strong, but so vulnerable and sensitive, so human. And maybe that was his fault, because he kept her tethered to the human world much more than her own world, a place where she was spoken of with reverence and awe.
He hadn't noticed the door open until Karim was standing over him, his intense green eyes staring down at him. Nicky started and clutched his chest, cursing under his breath before bursting into laughter. He sat up, throwing his legs over the edge of the bed and stretching.
"You scared the shit out of me." Nicky groaned. Karim smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.
"Sorry about that," he muttered going to sit on the sofa. "For a second I thought …" He pointed to Nicky who nodded his understanding.
"That she was back." He completed Karim's thought. "I know. It's like being here, it just reeks of her. Not just the smell of lavender, but the pictures and the clothes. I walked into her closet and saw all the things she won't wear, I couldn't tell you how many times Jonas had some big to-do for his business associates and Celeste would want to wear sneakers and jeans. She would give Arbor fits." He closed his eyes and bit back tears. "She didn't even get to say goodbye. It's going to tear her up."
"She is a fighter, she's strong." Karim was saying but Nicky shook his head.
"She's breakable. Karim, I know you love her, but you haven't seen her when she's hurting. I've seen glimpses, little peeks of it and that is so hard to deal with. You want to help her, but she... Remy, he's seen her at her lowest, when she was nearly feral, not speaking or eating, when she wouldn't let anyone touch her. She's come back from so much, but there is still that softness, that delicate part of her that remains cracked. She has a real hard time believing that she’s worthy of love, real love. She has all of that power but she’s so fragile."
Karim nodded, listening to Nicky talk about a side of Celeste that he had never seen. He'd seen the anger and frustration, he'd seen sadness but he'd never seen the devastation, the depression, the part that made those a
round her move in closer to protect her.
"That's why you love her?" Karim asked. Nicky shrugged, dropping into a chair. His exhaustion was getting the better of him, but he felt better talking to Karim. At least he had someone to commiserate with over it, another outsider brought into the fold simply because they had fallen in love with the same woman.
"I love Celeste for lots of reasons. She's beautiful and smart, strong and sexy. She's also stubborn and argumentative, absent minded and dresses like a twelve year old boy. But when she looks at you, really looks at you, it's like she can see your soul. She accepted me, this orphaned foster kid who followed her around like a puppy, made me a part of this family. She gave me roots and hope and unconditional love. She protects me even when I don't need it and forces me to do better. She says I'm her humanity. She's my compassion."
Karim smiled at that, liking Nicky more for his honesty. Even though he knew Celeste in a way he never would, he understood and appreciated the other man's feelings. Celeste was unique in her ability to make those around her feel both protective and protected.
"When did you know you loved her?" he asked and Nicky smiled.
"The first time I made her laugh. That laugh." Nicky covered his heart with his hands and fell back into the chair.
"That laugh," Karim agreed, shaking his head. "Is like music, isn't it? It kind of takes you by surprise at first."
"Because it's so freakin loud," Nicky said and Karim laughed.
"Like a bullhorn. But it's so light, and contagious. When she really gets going it is the best sound in the world," Karim said, looking down at his hands, the smile still in place.
"When did you know?" Nicky asked. "When did you know you’d fallen in love with her?"
Karim thought about that for a moment, scrubbing a hand over three days of stubble.
"It was long, long ago, before ...everything. It was a night in the desert, we were packing our horses and she was rambling on about something, she was always asking questions and telling stories. She asked me a question and I turned to look at her and it hit me. The moon was full, huge, hanging low in the sky; she was facing the horse, her hair catching the breeze, blowing behind her like a silken sail. She turned to look at me with those eyes and I couldn't breathe. She looked like an angel, that caramel skin was glowing, she was smiling, and that was it. I knew I was gone."
Nicky nodded, watching Karim with interest. When he didn't speak, Karim looked at him and found him staring with interest.
"I can't even sleep without her now. I've gotten use to her stealing the covers and throwing her legs across me in her sleep that I feel naked without her.” he sighed, “I'm starved. I think I'll call down to the kitchen for something to eat. You want anything?" This seemed to pique Nicky's interest. He sat up, new questions popping into his ever churning mind.
"You're a vampire," he said. Karim had the phone to his ear asking for club sandwiches, chips and sodas. He nodded at Nicky, his brows raised. When he hung up the phone and reclaimed his seat, Nicky leaned forward in his seat. "You ordered two club sandwiches and soda?"
"That I did," Karim agreed.
"But you're a vampire," Nicky repeated.
"A fact that has been well established," Karim chuckled.
"But you eat food." It was a question, but Nicky had said it as a statement.
"And drink beer and breathe," Karim nodded.
"But you're a vampire. Aren't you like dead?"
Karim laughed and shook his head. "I'm not that type of vampire."
There was a soft knock on the door before Frederick entered with a tray laden with food. He looked at the two men seated in Celeste's room and silently placed the tray on a low table between them. When he turned to leave, Karim stopped him, grasping his wrist.
"Thank you, Fredrick,” he said pointedly. Frederick gave him a small, sad smile and nodded. Once he was gone Karim turned to find Nicky staring at him, his brow furrowed in utter confusion. Karim reached for a sandwich and took a bite while Nicky worked out whatever was clicking in his brain. He didn't have to wait long.
"What type of vampire are you? I didn't know there were types?" Nicky reached for a sandwich and waited.
"I am one of the seven original vampire princes created by Nyx. We are the head of Vampiric Royal Court, I am Prince of House Tyre, second created, second oldest. I was born human but changed by Nyx when I pledged fealty to her a long, long time ago. I eat regular food and drink, but I need blood to survive. I can go days without feeding, but the longer I wait the worse my hunger becomes. If I wait too long, I become almost feral, dangerous. I can eat garlic, crosses do nothing to me and I have no problem procreating. The vampires that you're familiar with do exist, but as one of the Seven I don't have those weaknesses. Those vamps are created by the descendants of the Seven, sort of like being infected. They must die and be reborn, they must drink of the blood of their creator therefore they are tied to that vampire forever." He took a bite of his sandwich and waited.
"You can have kids?" Nicky asked and Karim nodded. "And you can change people to vampires? Have you ever done it?"
"No," Karim said. "I've never wanted to change anyone. You either have to be power hungry or have great love for someone you change. And there is always the risk that they don't make it through. I wouldn't want to risk it."
"And you can't go out in sunlight?" He took a bite of his own sandwich, intrigued by this information.
"No, I don't burst into flames immediately but exposure will kill me within a few minutes."
"Silver bullet?" Nicky smiled.
"They sting like a mother, but those kill Lycans - werewolves." Karim chuckled.
"Stake to the heart?" Nicky laughed.
"Will kill anything with a heart. Are you planning on killing me?" he asked. "I mean I know I snaked your girl and all -” Nicky threw a handful of chips at Karim and laughed.
"I just want to make sure I have all of the facts. Just in case I have to shank your ass,” Nicky said with a cheeky wink.
Karim nodded and became suddenly serious, his smile becoming a grimace.
"I'm glad she has you, you're a good guy, Nicky," Karim said. "She's going to need you. She's going to leave me, you know. I know it. I've known for a while and when she finds out what I did -”
"She already know and she understands." Karim was shaking his head, a sad smile on his lips. He stared at the sandwich in his hand and lost his appetite. He tossed it back on the tray and picked up a can of soda.
"It's not just that. I'm just a place holder. I can never truly make her mine. I've tried. That's why I can't feel her anymore. If our blood bond had been a true binding, I would feel her no matter where she was as long as she's alive. But I can't. It's like she just popped out of existence and I don't even know what to do to find her. I feel useless, unworthy." He shook his head and took a drink.
"If it helps, I know she loves you," Nicky offered.
"I know she does, and I love her to my marrow. But sometimes love just isn't enough. The longer I’m with her, the harder it will be in the end. Its better that it end sooner rather than later, because if I wait too long, if we have a child, I would never be able to walk away. I would never get over her when he … I just want to enjoy every second I have with her. When it ends, and it has to and it’s going to fucking kill me." He finished his drink and lay across the sofa, his arm thrown across his eyes. Nicky watched the vamp, slowing eating his sandwich and empathizing with him. Yet another soldier in the legion of men who, by no fault of her own, had lost his heart to Celeste.
***
She wasn't floating this time, not in the dark abyss or in the cloudless sky. Instead she was still in this room, this torture chamber and her body ached. She felt gentle fingers moving along her bruised cheek and opened her one good eye, but only a little, only slightly. Hands, warm, strong and comforting, rested on her shoulders, making her relax for a moment. She looked up and saw the deep blue eyes glowing in the darkness and sighed, resting he
r cheek on the back of one of his smooth obsidian hands.
"You are injured," he said in that deep, vibrato that shook her to her core. "I can help. All you must do is call for me." He came around the chair, kneeling between her thighs. He ran a hand along her bruised legs, up her arms, his eyes resting on her broken and swollen fingers.
"He is a good man, and he will love you for as long as he can, but you are mine and only I have the power to protect you, love. You must allow me to do so." She was looking into his beautiful face, smooth onyx skin and cerulean eyes glowing in the gloom of her cell. Tears came to her eyes and she sobbed, releasing the hurt and pain, the constant ache in her that had burrowed so deep that she'd forgotten it was even there. It lived in her, like the mark on her neck, reminding her of things that she'd tried to forget.
"Speak my name, and my power will live in you, my legion will be your protection, your shield from those that would harm you and those you love. Speak my name and I will take the pain away. Trust in me, you are mine and mine alone and I will watch over you, from this day forward."
"But Karim … " he laughed, a sound she hadn't heard before, but it calmed her. It was a rumble, deep and throaty, and settled over her. She smiled, feeling safe and loved, oh so loved.
"Karim is your consort ...for now. You are mine for eternity." He kissed her hands, one then the other. "He has taken the sting out of things you hadn't even realized were hurting you." He ran a finger across her wrist and she nodded. She no longer had the aversion to people touching her wrists, she no longer felt sick to her stomach when a kiss was placed on her neck or when she was grasped in a bear hug by surprise. Karim had done that for her, he had allowed her to trust again. She hadn't even realized it.
"He is who you need now, I am who you will need forever. Speak my name, and I will protect you." She heard movement in the room, nothing sinister, but a warmth that surrounded her. From the shadows, a grey figure standing at least nine feet tall stepped forward. His face was still, his eyes colorless and serene watched with curiosity.
Mark of the Fallen: A Fallen Novel Page 29