by Lisa Harris
“Don’t be sorry.” He patted her arm gently. “I’m not. I’ve been blessed with a long marriage, two beautiful girls, and three grandchildren, though I have been hoping for more. And as for you, just don’t close yourself off to possibilities.”
Someday. First she needed to find closure with Luke. Needed to get past the wall that was blocking the memories that refused to surface. And after that? After that, she still wasn’t sure.
“People always do tend to stay where they feel safe. Just don’t get too comfortable. Take a risk or two. That’s all I’m saying.”
She took her father’s hand and shook her head. “If you knew everything I had to do over the past twenty-four hours, I don’t think you’d be asking me to take any risks.”
“Just think about it.” He squeezed her hand, then stood up. “I think I’ll make myself some tea, then go watch some TV.”
Madison glanced at the near-full mug of tea still sitting on the table. How long would it be before he couldn’t remember how to make his own tea? How long before he couldn’t remember her name?
She pushed away the thoughts, then carried the cup to the counter, where her father was standing in front of the cupboard. “Do you still want your tea, Daddy?”
He shook his head, then kissed her on the forehead. “I think I’ll just go back to bed.”
She watched him start down the hallway to his room and pushed back the emotions that threatened to erupt. She finished the last of her coffee, then forced her mind to shift back to their fugitives. Her best plan at the moment was to continue going through the list Piper had sent her so they could start tracking them down.
Her phone rang and she grabbed it out of her pocket.
Jonas.
Madison stepped out onto the back patio where she could see the first hints of light from the sunrise. She took a deep breath and answered the call. “Hey. Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’m fine. I’m sorry to be calling you so early. Were you up?”
“It’s fine. I’m up.” She tried to interpret the tone of his voice but couldn’t. “I tried to call you last night. I’ve been worried.”
“I know, and I’m sorry I didn’t pick up.” He sighed. “I needed some time to clear my head.”
“I understand.”
There was a short pause on the line. “How long until you can get down to the office?” he asked.
“I don’t know.” She ran her fingers through her hair. What had he been doing all night? “Thirty . . . forty minutes, depending on traffic, I guess. What’s going on?”
“I’ve got the ID of one of our suspects.”
SIXTEEN
Jonas was sitting at his computer inside the US Marshals headquarters when Madison walked into the dimly lit space. He shifted his attention from the security footage he’d been going through on his computer and looked up at her. He could see the marked fatigue in her eyes and wondered if she’d gotten any more sleep than he had last night. Which only made him feel more guilty.
He should have called her back. Should have answered her texts. Instead he’d found himself battling to make sense of the nightmare he’d just been thrown into. But none of it was her fault, and he didn’t want her to think that he blamed her for what had happened.
“Hey.” She set a takeaway bag along with a drink carrier on the desk in front of him. “I wasn’t sure when you ate last, so I figured it was only fair that I return the favor. At this time of the morning, though, you’ll have to settle for fast food and coffee.”
He forced a smile, not wanting to tell her that he’d ended up skipping dinner last night and still didn’t have an appetite this morning. “I appreciate it. And thanks for coming in so early. I’m sorry if I woke you up.”
“You didn’t, and it’s not a problem.” She slid into the chair across from him. “Did you get any sleep last night? I know I didn’t get much.”
“Not a whole lot, though the food and coffee will help.” He leaned across the desk and picked up one of the cups. “Did you get anything out of your interview with Brandon?”
“No, but I don’t think he knows anything else.”
She glanced across the room that held a smattering of empty desks that would be filled in a couple hours. “Honestly, I’m surprised Michaels is still allowing you to work the case. Did you update him?”
“I’ve spoken with him.” Jonas dumped two packages of sugar into his coffee, then reached for a stirrer. “There will be more to process later, but I’ve given my statement and filled out a bunch of paperwork. He understands that there’s no way I can sit at home. I’ve been digging through security footage from the Pike Place Market.”
“You said you have a name?”
“A name and a face.” He took a sip of the coffee, then slid the photo he’d pulled from the DMV across his desk. “I spoke with someone who identified the man in the security photo. His name is Jesse Archer.”
Madison met his gaze. “A legitimate source?”
“Check it out for yourself.” He motioned toward the picture. “It’s definitely him.”
She reached for the photo they’d pulled from the security video and laid it beside the one from the DMV. “It definitely looks like a match. Similar build, hair style—”
“And my source said Archer has a tattoo on his arm.” Jonas tapped on the photo. “That matches the ID we got from the witness at the bank.”
Madison leaned back, a contemplative look crossing her face. “What do you know about this guy?”
“He has a record, though just a handful of misdemeanors. He never ended up serving any time. And from the information I have, he’s currently unemployed.”
“Interesting.” She pulled a breakfast burrito from the takeaway bag, then peeled off the wrapper and took a bite. “Do we have an address for him?”
“That’s our first problem. The address on his driver’s license is outdated.”
“You’re sure?” she asked after swallowing another bite.
“I went there myself early this morning. It was the address for his grandmother, who passed away recently. According to a neighbor who was coming back from a run, he used to live there, but it’s been at least a year. I’ve got someone trying to track him down, and in the meantime, I’ve been going through traffic cams, trying to see if I can establish how they left. By car, public transportation . . .”
“And?” she asked.
“So far I haven’t found anything. They seem to have simply vanished.”
“We know that didn’t happen.” Madison picked up her coffee, then took a big sip. “What about the storage unit receipt we found at Kira’s place?”
“We haven’t been able to reach the unit owners to verify the unit number.”
She rocked forward in her chair. “So we have no way of knowing how the storage unit and key are connected, or even if they are?”
“No, but we do have a patrol car surveying the location just in case they decide to show up.”
She shook her head. “I think they’re long gone. They’re not going to wait around here where every law enforcement officer is looking for them.”
“Maybe, but my gut tells me they’re lying low. They know that both Ben and Kira are in custody. Maybe they assume that their friends threw the pact out the window and turned in their names, and that the police are looking for them. How hard would it be to disappear in a city of millions until they can get what they need together—like passports and money?”
Madison shook her head again, clearly not convinced. “They’ve had a plan every step of the way. Why wouldn’t they have one now? A few fake passports and IDs, and they could be across the border before anyone even knows who they are.”
“I might agree, except these guys were cocky. I don’t think they planned where they were going, because I don’t think they believed they needed an exit strategy.”
“And yet, Kira said they made a pact if one of them was caught. They’d at least thought that far ahead.”
He nodded, but he could still sense the doubt in her expression. Tracking down people was what they did. They would keep searching until they found them.
“We both know that speculating isn’t going to get us anywhere.” She took a sip of her coffee, then set it back down on the table and started gathering the trash from their breakfast into a pile without mentioning that he’d barely touched his. “What about fugitive number four?” she asked. “Could your source recognize her?”
“Unfortunately, no. But if they are still in the city, they’re going to need help. A place to crash for a few days until they can gather what they need.”
“I agree with you on one thing. Unless we can get Kira or Ben to talk, we’re going to have to figure this out on our own.”
“I did call in for an update on Ben.”
“And?”
“He’s still in the ICU on a ventilator.”
“So he’s not going to be of any help.”
Jonas’s phone buzzed and he glanced at it. “Just a sec. It’s Hazel.”
He unlocked the phone, then quickly read through her text. He assumed she hadn’t slept all night and was still in shock over what had happened. And yet she was checking in on him.
“Is everything all right?” Madison asked.
“She just wanted to know how I was doing. Figured I wouldn’t be sleeping. Wanted me to promise to call her if I need anything.” He slid his phone into his pocket. “I had to tell her Felicia was gone.”
“How is she handling things?”
“She has a lot of support, but she’s devastated. Felicia was everything to her. Hazel practically raised Felicia after her parents died. I’m not sure I helped at all, but at least I was there.”
“Sometimes that’s all that really matters.”
He shrugged. “It doesn’t seem like enough. I felt like there was really nothing I could even begin to say to help.”
“That’s because there isn’t anything you could have said. You can’t fix this, Jonas, just like you couldn’t fix things when she lost her leg.” Madison got up, took their trash to the waste basket, then sat back down next to him. “But that’s not your job. You were there, and sometimes that’s enough.”
“She just didn’t deserve to lose her granddaughter.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry. I’m trying not to make this personal, but I think what upsets me more than anything else is the simple fact that this shouldn’t have happened.”
“You have no reason to be sorry, because you’re right. This shouldn’t have happened.” She reached out and squeezed his hand. “I know this isn’t easy for you, but you don’t have to pretend you’re okay. Not with me.”
Another stab of guilt sliced through him, even though he knew she understood. “I’m sorry I never called you back. I should have—”
“Stop apologizing.”
“I’m just trying to figure out how to deal with all of this. Not seeing her for so long with so many unresolved issues between us has been tough. And I’ll be honest. This has hit me harder than I thought it would.”
“Michaels told me you were there when she died. Did you get to talk to her at all?”
“We spoke briefly after she got out of surgery. Talked about some things we should have said to each other a long time ago.”
He squeezed his eyes shut briefly, knowing he’d never be able to erase that moment from his memories. He could still hear the machines beeping and people shouting as the code team tried to save her. “I felt like there was some resolution between us, but I also can’t stop thinking of all the things I wish I would have had time to say. Things she deserved to hear from me.”
“It’s going to take time for you to process everything,” Madison said. “Time to grieve. And you have to give yourself that time.”
“I know. It’s just hitting all at once.”
“I’m sorry, Jonas. I really am.”
He sat back in his chair, the urgency of finding their fugitives forgotten for the moment. “I still cared about her. Not in the way I once did. I accepted that door was closed a long time ago, but I still wanted what was best for her. And just when I felt there was a chance for closure between us, suddenly she’s gone.”
His emotions had been pulled tight the past twelve hours. So tight, he felt as if they were about to snap.
“She asked me if I’d ever come up with an answer to why I never asked her to marry me,” he said, not sure why he felt the need to pour salt in an open wound.
“Did you have an answer?”
“Just that I’d been waiting for the time when our careers and our lives would slow down.” He took a deep breath, blowing the air out slowly. “She told me she didn’t think we’d ever have made it, and I think she might have been right.” He glanced up and caught Madison’s gaze. “I guess no matter how hard you try, some relationships were just never meant to be.”
And others are worth pursuing.
The thought struck him hard. Madison sat across from him, intently listening. She understood love and loss, and yet while his heart was screaming at him to let her in, his head wanted nothing to do with another risk.
“Jonas?”
He waved his hand in front of his face, wishing there was a way to lighten the situation. “You know what loss is. Loss much deeper than an ex-girlfriend.”
“You can’t quantify loss, though. You have to take the time you need to grieve and let go. It’s part of life. Part of loss. I’m just . . . I’m sorry you have to go through this. I truly am.”
He grabbed an egg burrito out of the bag, then pulled back the wrapper. “She implied there was something between you and me.”
Madison’s brow furrowed. “Why would she say that?”
“I don’t know. Maybe it was her way of assuring me she’d let me go.”
“Maybe that was something you needed to hear from her.”
“I know I have held on to the guilt from that day for so long. I just could never get past wondering what would have happened if I would have made a different call during that raid. That guilt has always hung over me.”
“But those questions don’t lead to any resolution, because you can’t change the past, or know how different choices would have turned out. It just adds to your guilt and frustration.”
“I know.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “She did tell me something that made me happy. She’s seeing someone.” The bite he’d just taken turned rubbery in his mouth. “Was seeing someone.”
Since their relationship ended, he’d determined not to be bitter, but instead had only wanted the best for her. Now she was dead.
“Does her boyfriend know?”
“He took the red-eye into Seattle last night and a friend of Hazel’s picked him up, so yes, he knows.”
A tense silence settled between them, then Madison cleared her throat. “There’s something else we need to talk about.” She shifted in her chair. “Felicia saved my life. That bullet was meant for me—”
He held up his hand, wishing he could erase everything he knew she was feeling. “I already told you not to go there. Don’t take hold of the guilt like I’ve been carrying for far too long.” He paused. “Someone once told me that you can’t change the past.”
“Touché.” She shook her head, but he didn’t miss the half smile that formed for a brief moment on her lips before disappearing. “I admit I deserved that, but I’m afraid that every time you look at me, you’ll remember what happened to the woman you loved. I don’t want that to become a wedge between us. I don’t think I could live with it.”
Her confession took him by surprise. “Is that what you actually think?”
She shrugged. “You were planning to marry her.”
“Yes, but a long time ago. I didn’t go into that hospital room hoping to get back together with her. I just wanted to find some closure from how we left things between us. Yes, I still cared for her. She was important to me. And I wanted to be there to support her and Hazel.” He locked e
yes with her. “But I don’t blame you for what happened in there, Madison.”
“Because you blame yourself?”
Her question hit him like an arrow straight through his heart. How did she always see right through him to the most vulnerable places? “You know I felt responsible for when Felicia was shot the first time.”
“Maybe, but I know you well enough to be certain that you did everything you could to protect your team. That is who you are. Sometimes things go horribly wrong no matter how well laid the plans are.”
“That’s what Felicia told me.”
“Let the guilt go and start living again.”
He leaned back in his chair again, his mind racing. Was he using the past as an excuse to stop anything from happening between him and Madison? Fear of what might happen. Fear of what could happen. No. He’d been right with his decision not to date someone he worked with. The job they did was dangerous and unpredictable. And he’d gone through more than enough personal loss.
“We can talk about this later,” Madison said, seeming to sense his need to move on. “Just know that I’m here. Whatever you need.”
“I know that. And I appreciate it.”
She nodded. “So your contact. He couldn’t identify who Archer was with?”
“No.” Jonas followed her lead and shifted his mind back to the case. “Though he did tell me that he met Jesse’s girlfriend not too long ago. Her name was Nadia. But he wasn’t sure if she was the one in the photo.”
“Nadia. Wait a minute. I’ve got a Nadia on my list.” Madison grabbed the bag she’d brought with her and pulled out a file folder.
“What list?”
She dropped a few papers onto the desk. “I took the list Piper made off of social media and started to narrow it down to people who both live in the area and went to school with Ben and Kira. Nadia’s not a common name, so if we can connect the two—”
“We might be able to ID our fourth fugitive.”
“Exactly.” She ran her finger down the notepad she’d been working on, then stopped. “Look up Nadia Bower on Facebook and see what we can find out.”
He typed the name into the search engine, then waited for a match to pop up.