by Renee Ryan
Hailey O’Brien was turning out to be one formidable woman.
And Wolf was turning out to be a man who couldn’t say no to her.
Chapter Twelve
The sound of the airplane engine reminded Hailey far too much of Stella’s obnoxious growl. Perhaps that explained why she couldn’t stop shaking. Or maybe she wasn’t really shaking at all. It was hard to tell with the two-seater airplane vibrating like an overexcited Chihuahua.
Wolf’s muscle car had nothing on this contraption.
When they’d arrived at the airfield with the jumpmaster, the exterior of the tiny airplane had looked passable enough. But then all three of them had taken their places inside and Hailey had discovered the interior, save the pilot’s seat, had been gutted so that it could hold extra skydivers.
Now that they’d taken off, she glanced over the jumpmaster’s head at the gaping hole on their right, the spot where a door was supposed to be.
Gulping for air, she quickly turned her head the other way. But her gaze landed on the grinning man beside her and her stomach dipped to her toes.
Wolf’s expression held far too much glee. And maybe even a little bit of crazy.
Why wasn’t he more concerned they were about to jump out of an airplane at thirteen thousand feet? That was over two miles above the ground.
And they were in a flying tin can, with only a few scraps of material, strapped to their backs, preventing them from falling, literally, straight to their deaths.
Hailey wasn’t just scared. She was petrified.
Wolf must have read her mind, because he reached out and squeezed her hand. “Don’t worry,” he yelled over the airplane’s roar. “I packed our chutes myself.”
That gave her a measure of relief. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough.
She slammed her eyes shut, telling herself this was a large, courageous step in the right direction to becoming a woman of adventure. If she lived through this, Wolf had to go to the country club with her tonight. The two didn’t seem equally scary in her mind, but apparently they were in Wolf’s. It was all about perception, she supposed.
Keeping her eyes firmly shut, she ran through the instructions the jumpmaster, Ken, had drilled into her head all morning. As soon as the pilot cut the engine—and wasn’t that a frightening prospect?—the three of them were supposed to climb on the wing of the airplane and fall backward so they could clear the airplane.
She was then supposed to assume a position similar to a belly flop and simply enjoy the ride for seven thousand feet. Wolf and Ken would be on either side, guiding her. When the time came, they would release her and she would pull the rip cord on her own.
This, of course, was all assuming she was still conscious. A high possibility since the temperature was at least thirty degrees colder at this altitude.
She felt a tap on her shoulder. Unhappy with the interruption, she cracked open one eye.
“Tell me that isn’t a spectacular view,” Wolf shouted, pointing to the ground below.
Taking a deep breath, Hailey stabbed a glance out the window. They were flying directly above the ocean, but the shoreline was in clear sight.
Okay, yes, the view was beautiful. Unfortunately, Hailey couldn’t tell Wolf she agreed with him. She was too busy remembering the jumpmaster’s warning about landing in the ocean. If that little disaster occurred and she didn’t get out of the parachute quickly enough, the water could drag her under. To death by drowning.
And Wolf considered this fun?
The man had a death wish. Pure and simple.
Jamaica, Haiti, the Middle East, whether she spent a week or a lifetime in any of those locales, she didn’t think she’d feel as concerned about her life as she did now.
The pilot cut the engine.
The sudden silence took Hailey by surprise and she nearly choked on her own gasp.
“It’s go time,” Wolf said cheerfully.
Lord, please, please, get me through this alive. I don’t want to go splat on the ground. “I’m ready.”
She quit thinking so hard and let her training kick in. Just as Ken had instructed, she followed him onto the wing of the airplane, one terrifying step at a time.
Clinging to the metal structure, she scooted over far enough for Wolf to join them.
She didn’t dare look down.
Wolf’s hand closed over hers. “I’m right here with you. Every step of the way.”
She gave him a shaky smile.
“We do this together,” Ken reminded her.
“Right. Together.” She turned her palm and pressed it flat against Wolf’s. Her fear cut in half.
“On three.” He squeezed her hand then let go. “One. Two.”
“Three,” she shouted and then leaned backward.
Her feet tumbled over her head.
She only had time for impressions after that. Wolf and Ken were still on either side of her, holding her steady. The wind slapped her in the face so hard she could barely breathe, the noise of it screaming through her ears at a deafening level.
She checked the altimeter on her wrist, shocked to see she’d already fallen three thousand feet.
Wolf tugged on her jumpsuit. She glanced in his direction. He gave her a thumbs-up.
A few more seconds passed before Wolf and Ken let her go. That was her signal to take control. She threw the rip cord and felt rather than heard the Velcro release her parachute.
She braced for a hard jerk as the parachute began filling with air, but her feet floated gently below her.
Amazed at how easy the transition had been from free fall to floating, Hailey reached for the toggles. She practiced steering by pulling on one and then the other. At last, she allowed herself to look down.
The view was amazing. Blue sky, green water, sandy beach. How could anybody witness all this beauty and not believe in God?
With her senses poised on high alert, Hailey drank in the experience. Every sight, sound and smell consumed her.
Both Wolf and Ken landed several minutes ahead of her. Wolf gathered his parachute with quick, jerky tugs, all the while searching the sky for her.
She waved at him.
He waved back and then dropped the chute so that he could make a cradle with his arms, as if he were waiting to catch her if she fell.
It was a joke, but a really sweet one with all kinds of symbolism she didn’t have time to unravel.
Landing on the beach turned out to be somewhat anticlimcatic. She pulled hard on the toggles and hit the ground, feetfirst, with a soft thud.
Joy burst through her.
“I did it. I did it. I did it.” Hopping from one foot to the other, she pumped her fists in the air in her own version of a happy-dance.
Wolf scooped her up into a hug that lifted her several feet in the air.
Overwhelmed with emotion, she clung to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. “That was amazing.”
He set her on the ground and kissed her smack on the lips. “You’re amazing.”
They stared at each other. Both breathing hard. She wanted this man in her life. Always. But did he want to be in hers? Or was his promise to Clay the only thing keeping him here?
She hated that she didn’t know the answer to that, that he might not know for sure, either.
Wolf broke eye contact first and went about systematically removing the rest of his parachute, mainly the now-empty container still strapped to his back.
Ken joined them and gave Hailey a high five. “Well done, beautiful. One of the best first jumps I’ve ever witnessed.”
“It was fantastic.”
He helped her out of her parachute then turned to Wolf. “I need to get back to post. I have a buddy picking me up at the lighthouse. You two need a ride into town?”
Wolf shook his head. “We dropped off my car earlier this morning.”
“Good enough.” He smiled at Hailey and then handed her a small business card. “Let me know if you ever want to do this again. I’m only a phone
call away.”
She thought she heard Wolf growl. Surely she was mistaken? “Thanks, Ken,” she said. “But once was enough for me.”
“If you change your mind…”
She smiled. “I’ll call.”
“Sounds good.” He walked over to Wolf, said something in a low tone. Wolf nodded. They both laughed, then Ken slapped him on the back.
“All right. See you two later.” Ken headed out, waving a hand over his head in farewell.
Watching him leave with his parachute bunched in his arms, Hailey realized she was still jumping from foot to foot. “I can’t seem to stand still.”
“It’s the adrenaline.” Wolf slanted an unreadable glance in her direction. “It’ll wear off soon.”
She wanted it to wear off now. She hated this nagging, uncomfortable feeling, as if she were ready to jump out of her own skin. Too many emotions collided into one another. Excitement, fear, relief, joy and something else, something darker, something she couldn’t quite name.
“So.” She bounced toward Wolf. “What happens when the adrenaline finally wears off?”
He didn’t like the question. She could see it in the way his hands paused over folding his parachute.
“You’re gonna feel exhausted in a few minutes. Maybe even a little depressed. But it’ll go away soon enough and then you’ll be ready for your next jolt. Jump. I meant, jump.”
No, he’d meant jolt. “That sounds almost like…like…an addiction.”
He didn’t respond. But the uneasy look in his eyes told her she was right.
Was Wolf hooked on adrenaline? Was that why he drove a ridiculously fast car, owned a motorcycle, jumped out of airplanes?
“Wolf? Is that why you do this?” She waved her hand in a wide arc. “For the rush?”
“No.” He answered quickly, seeming very sure of himself.
“Then why?”
“It’s complicated.”
She waited for him to say more. But he just stared at the water. And stared. And stared.
Why wouldn’t he explain himself?
Still looking out over the ocean, he discarded his parachute and then sat down, right there where he’d been standing. He drew his legs up and caged his knees inside his clasped hands.
Hailey joined him on the sand, hugging her own legs to her chest.
“I don’t know why I jump out of airplanes, Hailey. I don’t analyze it. I just do it.”
There was more to it than that, but for now she accepted his explanation, determined not to push him. She sensed his reasons were tied to what happened to him in Iraq, but she wasn’t sure. The not-knowing was the hard part.
For several minutes they sat in silence. Hailey watched the waves crash onto the shore, one on top of another, never ending, never ceasing. Like God’s grace, freely offered to all who wanted it.
“If I was going to analyze my motives,” Wolf said at last, “I’d probably say it’s a test.”
“A test?” she repeated. “For who? You?”
“No.” He drew a circle in the sand with the toe of his boot. “I guess I’m testing God. I need to know if I was really meant to survive that attack, or if the Lord made a mistake. I need to know if I was a mistake.”
Tears filled her eyes. How could such a courageous, competent man think he was a mistake, when he had so much to offer the world? “Oh, Wolf. God doesn’t sit on some royal throne up in heaven, picking and choosing who lives and who dies.”
He lowered his chin to his chest. “What if He does?”
She gathered her words carefully. “I don’t know why the others died. Some things we’ll never completely understand until we get to heaven. It was just their time. You were left behind for a reason. The Heavenly Father has a plan for your life.”
“He can’t use me.” A devastated look flashed in his eyes. “I can’t be trusted. Look what happened on that roadside.”
Lord, he’s not hearing me. “You can’t keep blaming yourself, Wolf. It’s unproductive.”
He buried his face in his hands. His words were muffled, but she thought she heard him say he should have seen the bomb.
“Okay, Wolf, let’s go with that. Let’s say that, yes, you should have seen the bomb. Now what?”
He dropped his hands and leveled a shocked gaze on her. “What do you mean?”
“Supposing the accident was your fault. What then? Do you spend the rest of your life making amends? Or maybe you chase the next adrenaline high, until you ultimately kill yourself?”
He flattened his lips into a grim line. “I’m careful.”
“Nobody’s that careful.”
He grew silent.
Oh, no. He didn’t get to shut down on her now. They’d started down this road. They were going all the way. “If you’re right, Wolf, and you are to blame for your men’s deaths, then, I repeat, what comes next?”
“I…” He blinked, then shook his head slowly, miserably. “I don’t know.”
“Well, I do.” In fact, she knew exactly what came next. “You forgive yourself. That’s what. God has already forgiven you.” She leaned forward and touched her lips gently to his cheek. “I’ve forgiven you. Now it’s your turn, Wolf.”
His eyes hardened. “What? You think everything’s going to fall into place after I forgive myself? Is that what you’re saying?” His voice held a large amount of bitterness, but Hailey also heard an unmistakable twinge of hope underneath. Just enough to make her feel they’d made progress here today.
“Not all at once. But, yes, Wolf. Everything starts to get better after you forgive yourself.”
Chapter Thirteen
Wolf stood inside the country club, trying not to feel stiff and uncomfortable among the pretty people of Savannah. While he waited for the coat-check girl to return with his and Hailey’s claim checks, he pretended not to notice the wary stares thrown his way, or the wide berth most people gave him.
Obviously, this particular country club didn’t have a lot of military personnel among its membership. Like that was a big shocker.
He hid a yawn behind a slow, deep breath. His leg had started to ache hours ago, the lingering pain a constant reminder of what had happened that day in Iraq. Twice now Hailey had sent him reeling with her words of encouragement and forgiveness. She really didn’t blame Wolf for her brother’s death. He accepted that now, felt blessed by it.
If he was honest with himself, he’d rather be somewhere alone with Hailey, where they could talk, just the two of them. She’d be leaving for Haiti soon and he didn’t want her boarding the airplane until matters were a little less volatile between them. Nevertheless, she’d been incredibly brave this morning. It was only fair he held up his end of the bargain tonight.
Compelled, he glanced over at his lovely date. She was still speaking to the elderly couple she’d introduced him to when they’d first arrived. The Pattersons seemed nice enough. He shot a smile in their direction and tried to keep his thoughts clear, but they kept circling back to the conversation he’d had with Hailey on the beach.
Now that she’d forgiven him, she wanted him to forgive himself, as if it were just a matter of changing his mind-set.
Well, forgiveness wasn’t something Wolf had much experience with, not with the sort of childhood he’d endured. Survival, now that he understood. Wolf had lived the first fifteen years of his life in a vicious cycle of abuse and poverty. But he’d gotten out. Was it now his turn to give back?
A warm sense of destiny settled over him.
In the next moment the coat-check girl returned. He took the two slips she offered him with a smile and then turned back to his date.
His breath hitched in his chest. Hailey stood alone now, under a beacon of golden light, her smile solely for him.
He took a moment to simply enjoy the view.
The woman was all female curves in a fitted green dress. The color matched her glorious eyes. She’d piled her hair on top of her head in a messy array of curls that managed to look very elega
nt. At first glance her hair looked dark, almost black, but under the light Wolf could see the deep red undertones. The color reminded him of cherry cola. His new favorite drink.
“What?” Hailey cocked her head at him, her brow furrowed into a cute little frown.
He closed the distance a bit more, inhaling her perfume. He loved that spicy, floral scent that was solely hers. “I didn’t say anything.”
Her frown deepened. “You didn’t have to. You have a strange look on your face.”
He twirled one of her dark curls between his thumb and forefinger. “I was just admiring the view.” He dropped his hand. “If I haven’t told you already, you look beautiful tonight, Hailey. Really stunning.”
And Wolf was feeling incredibly tender toward her. The sensation made his heart pound so hard his chest hurt. Which wasn’t altogether a terrible sensation, just…unsettling.
“Well, I—” She visibly swallowed. “Thank you, Wolf. You look beautiful, too. I mean—” she gave a little self-conscious laugh “—you look handsome. The uniform is working for you.”
He leaned in closer, catching another whiff of her precious scent. “But is it working for you?”
“Oh, yeah.” Her eyes looked a little dazed. “It’s really working for me.”
“Then I’m glad I wore it.”
They smiled at one another.
“So where do we go next?” he asked, prepared to brave the rest of the evening for Hailey’s sake.
“The first room on our left.” She hooked her arm through his and tugged him down yet another over-decorated hallway.
“What’s in there?”
“The silent auction. Since we have over an hour before the dinner is served I figure we can see if there’s anything worth bidding on tonight.”
“Sure, why not?”
For the next ten minutes, they meandered through the room reserved for the silent auction. There were at least a hundred items up for sale.
There were fancy hotel stays with opening bids more than Wolf made in a month. There were weekend getaways, spa treatments, the latest electronic gadgets, lunches with dignitaries. But the one item that really grabbed Wolf’s attention was the ridiculous opportunity to spend the afternoon with Uga, the famous bulldog mascot for the University of Georgia.