Before she could consider the ones that were left, Max walked through the back hallway. Joy filled her as she hurried forward to wrap her arms around his waist. She settled her face against his chest and gave a deep sigh.
“There you are,” she murmured.
“You shouldn’t be so quick to hug me,” he said, stepping back just a little.
“Why? Did you bring Andrew the skunk back with you?” she teased. Then she got a good look at his face. He looked…stressed. “What’s up? Where did you go?”
“I…had some things to deal with.”
Sophia waited.
Max grimaced. “I just came back to apologize. I can’t believe I didn’t realize it was my mother. I tracked down the motorcycle. It belongs to one of the gardeners.”
He paused. As if he were waiting for her to blow up at him or something. Sophia frowned and shrugged. “Apparently he moonlights.”
“Be serious, Sophia. It was right there under my nose the whole time, and I didn’t catch on. I almost let your big night be ruined.”
“No way—” she started to say. But Max, apparently juiced up on guilt, interrupted her.
“I’m responsible,” he said, his chin jutting out.
She was still puzzled, but now Sophia was getting pissed, too. Why was he ruining their cuddlefest?
“You’ve got to be kidding,” she said incredulously. “How do you figure this is all about you?”
“I’m the one who pushed you to do the show with von Schilling,” he said coldly. His tone was worthy of that big high society house he’d grown up in. Rigid, uptight and distant. “I’m the one who was supposed to provide security for the show and make sure nothing happened. And it was my mother who not only almost ruined your show, but who has spent the past month vandalizing your gallery, tried to evict you and destroy your business.”
Sophia sucked in a deep breath.
“So let me get this straight,” she said. “You’re taking credit for the state of my career?”
The icy mask cracked. Brows furrowed, he gave a little shake of his head. “No. I’m taking the blame for its destruction.”
“But I’m the one who made the choices I did. Your mother made her choices. Why can’t we have the blame?”
“Because I should have stopped it, of course.”
“Oh, fine. You win. You’re so freaking bright, the universe should revolve around you instead of the sun. There’s just no reasoning with you.” Sophia threw her hands in the air. “It’s all your responsibility. Obviously you don’t believe I’m capable of running my own life when you can do it so much better for me. Which of my many problems will you solve next?”
He just stared at her. His soldier face. Blank, stoic, detached.
“There’s only one that I see. And I’ve already solved it,” he said. His words were even, his tone soft and quiet.
“You solved it, did you?” she asked, just as quietly. Hers wasn’t a soothing tone, though. Nope, she just sounded bitchy. Sophia wanted to cry. She didn’t want to sound bitchy. She wanted to sound romantic, sweet. To curl up in his lap and tell him how glad she was the problems were over, to give him big sloppy kisses, then start planning the rest of their lives—or at least their next few months—together.
“I did solve it, yes.” The corner of his mouth twitched with the hint of a humorless smile and he shrugged.
“Care to fill me in?”
“I talked to my uncle. I told him how I felt. I made it clear that if he didn’t step out of my career, I’d be leaving the service.”
“You confronted him?” She should be glad, shouldn’t she? He’d stood up for his career. For something he loved. And he was thanking her for pushing him to do it.
But she didn’t feel glad. She felt scared.
“I met with him. We settled things. He’ll stay out of my career from now on.”
“What are you saying?” she asked. She knew. She’d known from the beginning but she’d let herself hope. She’d let her heart dream out loud that secret little hope she hadn’t even admitted to herself when she’d pretended to be happy he’d be leaving at the end of the month.
Then, when he’d told her he was staying, she’d actually believed it could work. She’d have made him happy enough if he’d stayed. But how selfish was it to expect someone you loved to settle for enough?
“My original orders were reissued. I’m going back to Afghanistan. I leave Wednesday.”
Sophia licked her lips, trying to find the words. Any words. Her mine was blank, engulfed in pain.
“I’ll come see you before I leave,” he murmured, reaching out to slide his hand through the heavy fall of her hair.
“No,” she whispered, blinking fast. She wasn’t going to fall into a puddle of mush and make him feel guilty. She wasn’t going to mess with his head or try to make him second-guess his decision. “I’m going to be busy this next week. Despite the problems, the show was a huge success. We’ve got a series of smaller events all week. I’ll be tied up here and need to focus. On business. On negotiating with your mother.”
On learning to survive without him.
“This doesn’t have to be goodbye,” he said, even though his tone said he knew it was. “If you’d like, we can—”
“No,” she exclaimed before he could finish the suggestion.
She took a deep breath, then shook her head.
“No,” she repeated, more calmly. “You know the rules. No baggage when you return to duty. Rico told me about that.” He winced, but she shook her head. She didn’t want him to feel bad. That was its own form of baggage and she’d be damned if she’d send him back to war lugging it with him.
“Max, it’s fine. You’re doing what you’re meant to. And we knew we only had a short time. We made the most of it. It was a wonderful month, but now it’s over.”
Just like she’d intended. Wow, look at that. She’d made a plan, seen it through and got exactly what she’d said she wanted. And now he needed to leave before she started crying.
“Be safe,” she said quietly.
She stood on tiptoe, brushing a soft kiss over his lips. His hands clenched her shoulders. Max gave her a long look. She could see the arguments in his eyes. Which meant he could probably see the pain in hers.
Then, finally, he nodded.
And he turned to leave.
She waited until the door closed behind him.
Just in case, she waited a few seconds more.
See. She was in complete control.
And then, unable to stand any longer, she threw herself on the couch and gave in to the tears.
14
THE NEXT MORNING, SOPHIA had cleaned the gallery and was now tallying sales. She had to keep re-adding, though, because the number on the calculator seemed too big to be real.
“I’m surprised you didn’t use these photographs in the negotiations,” Tabby said. She stood next to Sophia in the storeroom, wrapping the half-dozen framed photos of her wild cage times in innocuous brown paper. “If you pushed hard enough, I’d have probably bought you the building to keep these out of sight.”
“Isn’t it bad for negotiations to give that kind of information away?” Sophia asked, shoving aside the adding machine—was that number really right?—to help wrap one of the framed photos.
“Oh, no. We already made the deal and you won’t go back on your agreement.”
Sophia considered that and sighed. Yeah, Tabby was right.
“It worked out okay,” she said with a shrug. “I got what I wanted.”
Sort of. Now that the looming threat of being evicted was off her shoulders, Sophia didn’t really know what she wanted.
Success, of course. But in what way? In the normal way—return the gallery to the old format and keep the boobs out of it? Or in the holy crap way—she’d made a lot of money last night and those photos really weren’t porn?
“Why’d you do these photos?” Sophia asked, the words out of her mouth before she could stop them.
Then, because she’d already put her foot in it, she continued, “I mean, I understand why you wanted to get them back. But why’d you pose in the first place?”
Tabby paused. She looked across the table with dark, intense eyes she’d passed on to her son and considered. She was back to society matron today. Her hair perfectly coiffed, her clothes dry and sedate. But there was a wicked light in her eyes that Sophia kind of liked. It made her more real.
“I guess I thought it was a good idea at the time,” Tabby finally said. “I’d had a pretty sheltered upbringing and was free for the first time. Out on my own, independent, determined to make my mark.”
They both glanced at the triple-matted photo framed in dark walnut. Her hair had been a waterfall, hanging straight and heavy to her hips. Thigh-high white patent leather boots, a barely-cover-the-essentials skirt whose fringe screamed shimmy. Peeking through all that hair was a perky rack like only a twenty-year-old could claim.
“And this was your mark?”
“It was one of them.” Tabby gave a little smile and folded the paper, hiding her mark. “But then I met Marshall and realized that he wouldn’t be comfortable with that. I had a choice. Continue with my little rebellion, or return to the life I’d grown up in, create a future and make my mark in other ways.”
“So you gave up your dreams to get your man?” Sophia surmised.
“Goodness, you’re making this into a much bigger deal than it actually was.”
This from a woman who’d smuggled a skunk in her purse.
“I’ve made a point not to interfere in my son’s life. He’s got enough of that from his father’s side of the family, after all. But I’m going to make a tiny exception right now and suggest that you and Maximilian sit down and talk to each other. I’m sure whatever the problem is, you can solve it if you want to.”
“I doubt it,” Sophia muttered. She’d let Max go for his own good. So she wouldn’t—couldn’t—do anything to solve the misery engulfing her.
“I know why he’s so stubborn,” Tabby said, folding the brown construction paper neatly over another framed photo. “But why are you?”
Emotionally numb, Sophia just stared.
“Maximilian was raised with expectations. He was told from the time he started walking what his life was going to be. My husband had huge plans for his son.” Tabby paused her wrapping, lost in memories for a moment. Then she shrugged. “Some people would have rebelled and walked away from having their entire life outlined for them before they were out of diapers. Luckily, Max loved the Army. He’d never wanted to be anything but a soldier.”
“So he fell right in line with what his daddy wanted.”
“Oh, no,” Tabby protested, holding out a length of twine and eyeing it before wrapping it around the wrapped frame. “Max was a smart one. He got what he wanted on his terms, not his father’s. He’s always been determined to go his own way. I expect that’s one of the things he found so attractive about you. That independence.”
Not attractive enough to want to continue a relationship with her, though. Sophia tried to stop her lower lip from trembling. She’d promised herself she was through crying, dammit.
“I didn’t mean to upset you,” Tabby said, sounding sincere despite the stiffness of her words. “To be honest, while at first I thought the relationship might be serious, now I realize it’s anything but.”
Sophia heard the condemnation in those snooty words.
“How can we have a relationship thousands of miles apart?” Sophia asked, wiping at the tears streaming down her cheeks.
“It’s doable, as I well know.” Tabby arched a brow and gave Sophia a piercing look. “Of course, it doesn’t matter since you’re perfectly willing to let him go? You had all the means right there at your fingertips to make him stay but you refused to use them.”
“You mean emotionally blackmail him into giving up his career?” Sophia glared. Did the woman never learn? Hadn’t last night showed her that manipulation and sneaking around never paid?
“Don’t be silly. You wouldn’t ask him to give up his career any more than he’d ask you. That’s not love, after all.” Tabby added her last package to the stack on the hand truck and then gave Sophia a stern, penetrating look at odds with her fluffy society looks. “Or, well, I guess it’s not love, anyway, is it? At least not on your part.”
Shock was the only thing that kept Sophia from pro testing.
Tabby shifted the hand truck into travel mode. “To quote my daddy, ‘Until you step up to the plate and swing, you’re just pretending to play the game.’ In other words, you obviously didn’t care as much as you claim, now, did you?”
Stunned, Sophia let her go.
Apparently it was time to put away the martyr wear and go get her man.
Before she could, the phone rang. She glanced at the caller ID. “Hi, Olivia. What’s the news?”
“THIS IS NICE.”
Sophia turned from her contemplation of the ocean and gave a shaky smile. She loved the estate, especially the gardens and this view. She was so glad to be able to share them with Max.
“I didn’t think you’d come.”
“You asked me to, so here I am,” he said as he stepped farther into the garden. Her breath caught at the sight of him.
He was in uniform. God, he was gorgeous. He was always sexy, no matter what he was or wasn’t wearing. But seeing him in uniform almost gave her a heart attack. Desire curled deep in her belly. Her nipples tightened and heat pooled between her legs. She wanted to check her chin for drool.
“I love this spot,” she said, stalling. She had so much to say, so much on the line. And she was terrified. “It always makes me think of romance.”
“Is that why you called me? You wanted a romantic goodbye?” He sounded both shocked and a little angry. She couldn’t blame him, considering how she’d blown off his suggestion that they try to keep their relationship alive long distance.
“No. I didn’t want to leave things ugly between us. What we have is too special for me to let you leave without telling you…” She couldn’t do it. The words choked in her throat. Black spots danced in front of her eyes. She gulped and sidestepped. “Without telling you what I’ve done.”
“What did you do?” he asked, a little half smile playing on his lips.
“I made a deal with your mother, the photographs of her in return for the Historical Guild not selling the building. And she’s going to help me with some promotion for the gallery. The exhibit was such a success, I realize it’d be stupid not to show nudes. Tasteful ones, at least. And apparently, the nude photos only pose a problem for your mother if she’s in them,” she told him. His wince made her smile.
When he didn’t say anything, though, she kept babbling. “I heard from my attorney yesterday, too. Lynn’s agreed to settle. The battle over Joseph’s will is over.”
She tried to remember that incredible feeling of triumph when Olivia had called to tell her they’d waved the white flag. But she couldn’t get past the frayed knots of nerves in her belly.
Then Max’s grin flashed, instantly relaxing her. Sophia automatically smiled back.
“Did you get everything?” he asked.
Sophia wrinkled her nose. “I got everything I really wanted. This estate, my jewelry, the cash holdings. She gets the business and stocks.”
“That’s great.” He reached out and wrapped one arm around her shoulder, pulling Sophia close and giving her a quick kiss.
“Congratulations. Your life is exactly what you wanted now,” he told her. “You’ve settled the will. Your gallery is both successful and safe. And you’ve reclaimed your life.”
He reached out and slid one hand over the heavy fall of her hair and arched a brow. “What’s next?”
She’d rehearsed what she wanted to say. She’d written it down, polished it and memorized it as if it were a part in a play. She’d figured it’d give her control over the discussion.
But her mind was blank.
“I love you,” she said.
“I love you, too.”
Their kiss was gentle and sweet, making Sophia’s heart sing and her toes tingle. Slowly, Max pulled back to look into her eyes.
“I didn’t want to love you,” he confessed. “I wanted to be able to walk away. Hopefully set the memory of you aside so you weren’t in my way.”
Her brows shot up. He grimaced.
“Not like that.” He paused, trying to find the words. “All my life, I’ve felt penned in by rules. My family’s rules. Uncle Sam’s rules. Hell, even my own rules. I accept them all, and understand their value. But sometimes I just have to break one. Like seeing you. I knew you could make me break my number one rule, but being with you was worth the risk. But a part of me was afraid you’d put strings on me and do what my uncle failed to—make me take the easy career path and end my respect for what I was doing.”
He stopped, watching her face. Sophia couldn’t believe his fears were the exact same ones she had herself. Different, but the same.
“I’d never want to hold you back,” she said softly.
“I know. I finally realized that. You pushed me to confront my uncle, to fight for my station. You cared enough about what mattered to me to let me pursue it.”
“Like I said,” she told him, “I love you.”
His smile flashed just before he took her mouth. His lips seduced, sweet and sexy as they moved softly over hers. He pulled her closer, so her breasts pressed against the stiff fabric of his jacket. His medals poked her shoulder, adding an oddly erotic element to the kiss. Sophia melted into him. Their tongues slid together in a familiar dance of passion.
“I want to marry you,” he said quietly, drawing back just enough to look into her eyes.
Sophia’s heart raced. Oh, yes, she wanted to yell. She wanted to dance around the garden and clap and laugh with joy. But she couldn’t.
“I can’t marry you,” she said quietly, holding tight to his hands so he wouldn’t step away.
He frowned and shifted. Not away, but enough so that they were no longer plastered together.
Uniformly Hot! Volume 1 from Harlequin: Letters from HomeBreaking the RulesComing Up for Air Page 33