I spend almost two and a half hours out on course, thinking it through and studying it. I come to the last jump and see that the vet box is being set up. This is the real deal. When the horses come off course, the riders will head to the vet box where buckets of water and ice will be used to start cooling off the horses. Their temperatures, pulse, and respiration will be taken. We have ten minutes to get them back to normal. Temps can run up as high as 107, and the average temperature on a horse is between 99 and 101, so it’s super important for obvious reasons to get them back to normal as quickly as possible. All the horses here are prime athletes and in prime condition. They should be, anyway.
I hear my name and turn around to see Joel. I wave and walk over to him. “You walk the course?” I ask.
“Just started. You?”
“I did.”
“Doing this right means a lot more today than it did last night,” he says. “It has always been a big deal to me, but Melody and I have to come out on top.”
“What do you mean?”
“My dad. I talked to him and get this: the jerk tells me that I can only bring Melody back with me to school if I win this weekend.”
“What?”
“Yeah.” He shakes his head. “Come on, you know how these events go. There is never a guarantee even if you are the best. And, I am not the best.”
“Don’t shortchange yourself. You are good and Melody is good. I just think that is horrible of your father.”
“That’s my dad for you. See, he knows this will be pretty close to impossible for me.”
“Have you spoken with your mom?”
“Yeah. She’s trying to do everything she can to make sure that he can’t take Melody from me, but it looks like he has the upper hand since he bought the horse when they were separating. I don’t know what to do. I can’t lose her.”
“You won’t. Focus on the win. That’s what you have to do right now.”
“Yeah. Right,” he replies.
“Rock star attitude.” I try to make light of it, get him to smile, but it’s not working. I know the magnitude of what his father is suggesting. Just putting that kind of pressure on someone could make them blow the whole thing. “Maybe you should talk to Kayla and Holden.”
“What could they do?”
“I don’t know.” I do have something brewing in my head. It’s sort of on the wrong side of things, but if Joel does not win the event, this idea might be a last-ditch effort to help him keep his horse. “You know the saying that every horse is for sale, for a price?”
“Sure. I’ve heard that.”
“What if someone came in and made an offer that your dad couldn’t refuse?”
“Well, how would that do me any good? Then, I would lose her for sure.”
“Maybe not. Not if the person who bought her was someone you were close to.”
“Do you have money stored away somewhere that you haven’t told me about, Vivvie?”
“No. But the Fairmonts have money.”
“I can’t ask them. I can’t,” he replies.
“I understand.”
“I guess I’d better focus on the win,” he says.
My heart goes out to him. His face looks so determined and, at the same time, the worry in his eyes isn’t lost on me. I am seriously afraid for him.
“Want to walk the course again?” Joel asks.
“No. I’ll do it tomorrow after my dressage test. I have a lesson with Kayla in about an hour. We are going to run through the test again.”
“Ah. I had mine a bit ago with Holden. I heard about Riley and Santos. Can you tell him that I’m sorry since he isn’t exactly speaking to me?”
“You got it.”
I walk back to the barns thinking that I have to find a way to help Joel keep Melody.
CHAPTER forty-nine
Let’s do that half pass at the canter one more time, Vivienne.”
Harmony and I come around and make the turn at letter A. As we head down the center line, I maintain forward impulsion as I begin the half pass with her, which is a movement in which the horse moves forward and sideways at the same time. Harmony’s doing it exactly right as her head leads slightly in the direction of the movement. I’m asking her to maintain the bend to the right by keeping my inside rein quiet. I support her neck by using my outside rein to prevent her head from being over turned to the inside. I place my inside seat bone more heavily on the saddle, to help maintain balance. My outside leg goes behind the girth and the half halt actions of the outside rein, and helps Harmony move in the half pass.
We do this move with fluidity and precision, and when I come back around, Kayla tells me to halt her down the center line. Harmony comes to a perfect halt. Kayla claps. “You do everything like you did today, you will have a great test tomorrow.”
“Thank you.” I let Harmony walk on a long rein.
Kayla comes into the arena and walks alongside of us. “You feeling good?”
“Yes. Kind of nervous,” I reply.
“If you weren’t nervous, you wouldn’t care, and you wouldn’t be good at what you do.”
“I have to talk to you,” I say. I can’t believe that I am doing this, but I have to.
“Sure. You can always talk to me.”
“It’s about Joel.” I tell her what is going on with him as far as Melody is concerned and what his dad has told him.
“That’s awful. Really terrible.”
“We have to do something,” I say. “I mean, no one is ever guaranteed a win at an event. You know that.”
“You’re right. I don’t know what I can do, though, Vivienne. I can try and talk to Mr. Parker, but that is really a family matter.”
“You have to offer to buy Melody. And, then give her to Joel.”
She laughs at this. “I can appreciate you being such a good friend, but that isn’t the right answer. I can’t just go and buy the horse and give it to Joel.”
“Why can’t you? You can afford to.”
“That’s quite an assumption.” She is staring up at me. Harmony has stopped walking. Kayla is shading her eyes with her hand.
“But you can and you have to.”
“Vivienne, you’re being a little bit irrational.”
“I know about you and Christian,” I spit out.
“What?” She drops her hand.
“I know that you’re having an affair. I’ve seen you two together and someone else saw you kissing. Someone who I have begged not to tell anyone about it.”
She sighs and doesn’t say anything for a minute. “You’re a good kid. You’re a fantastic rider and student, so I am having a hard time right now because it sounds like you’re trying to blackmail me. Are you honestly suggesting that I make an offer to buy Joel’s horse to prevent you from telling people what you think you know about Christian and me?”
I don’t respond.
“I’m disappointed in you, but I’m going to tell you the truth. Maybe once you hear me out, you’ll put all your ridiculous thoughts of blackmail aside. The facts are that Christian and I are together and we are in love. Holden and I have never been in love. We are friends and business partners. I met him after he came here from Canada and needed a green card to stay in the US. I liked him enough to help him gain citizenship by marrying him. He helped me with my riding career, and also in starting the academy. We became very comfortable in our life together. But after Serena was killed last year, I got to know Christian as I helped him through his grief, and although we didn’t mean to, we fell in love with each other. It just happened. Holden understands this, which is why he’s fine with us getting a divorce but continuing on as partners and friends. The school will remain as it is. It’s just other things that will change.”
I am speechless.
“I can really appreciate you wanting
to help Joel out,” she says. “You are a good friend, but don’t screw up your future,” she says. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
I want to ask her if she plans to kick me out of school. I want to know why she and Holden lived the way they have for so long. But I can’t do any of that. In fact, I’m getting the feeling I should never open my mouth again. All I can do is hope that I haven’t completely messed up my future at Fairmont.
CHAPTER fifty
What is it?” Tristan asks. “You’re so quiet tonight. Is it more than just your nerves?”
I gaze out at the peaceful koi pond. Tristan and I decided to bring sandwiches here and eat a dinner along its banks since there isn’t a party tonight. Of course there isn’t, because tomorrow is when the competition all begins.
“Kind of. Not really.” Before I can start crying, I tell him everything—about Joel, Christian, and Kayla . . . and what she said to me.
“Hey, it’s going to be okay. You were trying to do something good and Kayla knows that.”
“It’s not like me, though. I was willing to blackmail Kayla Fairmont!”
“For a good reason.”
“That doesn’t make it right.”
He puts an arm around me and pulls me in close. “What you did makes me love you even more. You are human.” He smiles at me.
“What did you say?”
“That you’re human, and sometimes we do what we have to do to protect people who we love.”
“No. That’s not quite what you said,” I say. “You said that what I said to Kayla made you love me even more.”
“Oh, that. Okay. Yes, Vivienne . . . guess what? I love you.”
Heat rises to my cheeks. “Oh.”
“And?”
“I think I love you, too,” I say.
“Think?”
“I mean, I do. I love you.”
He tickles me around my waist. “Good. Now that we have that out of the way, let’s eat our dinner. Tomorrow is big.”
“Yes it is.” I grow quiet again though because I really need him to be honest with me. “We just said we loved each other and that means the world to me, but . . .”
“Uh-oh. But what?”
“I need to know what you’re keeping from me. About your family.”
He sighs heavily. “I can’t.”
“I’m worried about you. I can help you, and I’m worried that Lydia is holding this over your head, and that it can really be bad for you. I have this feeling . . .” I can’t tell him that his horse has also given me information. I am also curious as to what Lydia implied about him just keeping his secret because he can.
He shakes his head. “I’ll tell you what. . . . I’ll make you a deal. Let’s get through this week and think about doing the best that we can out here so we can both wind up together at Liberty Farms this summer, and when we get back to Fairmont next week, I promise that I will tell you everything. Okay?”
“I think it’ll have to be okay.”
We finish dinner and walk back to the house. Once again he leaves me at my door with me wanting him to come inside the room, but God knows if we got caught it would surely seal my fate at Fairmont, which I think is in limbo as it is anyway. If I were Kayla, I wouldn’t be thinking too highly of me right now. On top of feeling my nerves race in regards to the competition, I’m having anxiety about whether or not I’ll even have a school to go back to. I’m also coming to grips with the idea that Tristan isn’t going to tell me what’s going on in his life until we are back at school. As I think about all of this, a terrible thought occurs to me: if I am asked to leave Fairmont, I will lose Harmony because she belongs to the school. As this thought sinks in, I run to the bathroom and throw up my dinner.
I’m sitting on the toilet leaning my head back against the wall when I hear angry voices coming from next door. Joel is in the room next to mine. I can’t make out who he is talking to. It’s a girl. Is it Lydia?
I crack open my door and wait to see who comes out of his room. I am pretty shocked when after a few minutes I see Emily storm out.
I don’t even try to follow the none of my business rule—it just doesn’t come to me naturally. I leave my room and go after Emily. I know that her room is in another wing of the house. I spot her up ahead and call out her name. “Emily, wait up.”
She turns around and it looks like she’s been crying. “What?” she says, sounding irritated.
“Is everything okay? I didn’t mean to, but I heard you and Joel, and it didn’t sound all happy.”
She opens her bedroom door and doesn’t respond. Finally, she looks at me and says, “Come in.”
I walk into her room, which is as beautiful as mine but with just a slightly different décor. The room is light and airy, painted white with a dark wood canopy bed and a red lounge chair by the window. And, as to be expected, there are framed photos of famous event horses on the walls. I notice a bottle of over-the-counter sleeping pills on her nightstand and there are a couple of prescription vials as well. “Are you okay?” I ask and point to the vials.
She laughs in a sarcastic way. “No. I am not okay. I’m on antidepressants and antianxiety drugs.”
My eyes widen.
“That’s right. I have severe anxiety issues, believe it or not, and I have to take meds for it.”
“Oh.” That is all I can come up with because this is a bit of a shock. Sure, I know that Emily has issues. That much has been obvious to me, but I didn’t know the extent of her problems. I have to wonder if the Fairmonts are aware of this, because I don’t know what the rules are on riding horses at this level while taking the types of medications that she’s clearly on.
“Right. Oh. Hey, so, did you know that Joel is gay?”
Once again—caught off guard. “Did he tell you that?”
“No. He didn’t. I received a text message from an unknown number that said he is. I didn’t believe it at first. I thought it was a joke because, first off, it came from someone who was claiming to be a friend. But then I started thinking about it. I see how all over each other you and Tristan are, and it sure isn’t that way for me and Joel. He doesn’t even seem to want to kiss me. He barely wants to hold my hand. It kind of made sense to me then that it might be true. I went and asked him, and he didn’t exactly come out and say that he is gay, but he didn’t deny it, either. He just looked at me and didn’t say anything.”
“I’m sorry, Emily.”
She wipes tears from her face. “Did you know, Vivienne?”
“I don’t want to get involved in this,” I say.
“Great. Who else knows?”
I shake my head. “I wish I could help you. I should probably be getting back, and you should try and let this stuff go because tomorrow is a big day.”
“Oh yeah, just let it go that Joel has been leading me on all this time and no one was willing to tell me the truth. Screw you, Vivienne.”
“I’m sorry.” I leave Emily’s room upset with Joel—and angry with myself for knowing the part I played in causing her pain. Especially since, from the looks of it, she seems to have enough pain inside of her already.
CHAPTER fifty-one
Breathe out there, kid. Just ride it like we talked about on the walk,” Christian says. “You being the path finder is a big responsibility out there. You and Harmony are our strongest rider-and-horse combination, so remember that the job for you is to go clear, even if you get some time penalties. You come back and report how the course rides to me, and I’ll share the information with everyone out after you. Remember everything we talked about when we walked the course together.”
I try and take his advice and breathe. Today is a major day. Yesterday was dressage, but today is the best, the optimum, the most exciting day of all. It is cross-country day, and we are all at the barn before seven. The lines to get into t
he horse park were really long, and I have gone over the course yet again. I feel as ready as Harmony and I can possibly be. I am the eighth rider out, and my time to go is 8:58. Horses are being sent out on the course in four-minute intervals. The weather is a little sticky, and there is a drizzle every so often. It did rain last night, so I know there may be some slick spots to watch for out there.
I woke up with the fierce determination that my focus would remain solely on Harmony for the rest of our time here. The drama and antics of everyone around me is eating me alive, but I shouldn’t be letting it distract me. I signed up to ride and win, and that is my plan.
And so far, my plan has paid off! Our dressage score was a 31.2, which is really fantastic. I am in second place at the moment, and Joel is in first. I guess he is finding his focus as well. I haven’t spoken to him about Emily, and I haven’t spoken to Emily any further, either.
“Okay.” All I want right now is a moment by myself with Harmony. I am extra nervous to be chosen as the team’s path finder.
“Why don’t we go over and warm up?” Christian says.
I agree, and Kayla adds, “You’ve got this. I’ll be in the vet box.”
“Thank you.” I appreciate that she’s not being weird with me after the way I practically tried to blackmail her.
We head over to the warm-up area with Christian. I do a short hack on Harmony, and then Christian has me start sending her over the jumps. The clock ticks down, and it isn’t long before Christian is letting me know it’s time for us to go to the start box. I lean over Harmony’s neck and whisper, “You ready? This is our moment, sweet girl. This is it.”
The starter gives us a two-minute warning. I work to clear my thoughts so the only thing left in my mind is me and Harmony. I imagine for a moment what I want her gallop to feel like, how my body will react to set her up for the jumps, and quickly tick off the jumps in my mind.
Dark Harmony: A Vivienne Taylor Horse Lover's Mystery (Fairmont Riding Academy Book 2) Page 22