Not an unknown sugar daddy. Gifts from her lover.
Eddie. But how?
How had he paid for all those gifts?
Since I updated the budget every few days, how on earth…?
What about that credit card statement Eddie said was a mistake? Perhaps it hadn‘t been a mistake?
Who else but Eddie would have given her all those “love tokens”? But where was his secret money source?
Shrouded in the blanket, I turned on the central heating and crept to our computer in the study. Eddie put everything on the computer. Would he be over confident and think I wouldn’t know how to find his secrets?
He might. Before tonight, he’d have been right.
I began a methodical search. Most files were irrelevant. After thirty minutes I found a file lurking in deep cover. Inside a document labelled “Motorbike Photos”, he had another file labelled “Bike Savings”. Inside that file was a subfile labelled “Gym Workouts”. Clever enough to seem innocuous. Not now, though.
Dozens of files were tucked in there. Password protected. Hmm. What might he use? Not his birth date. Too dumb. He worked with figures and facts all day. Something clever. I racked my brains. I tried his ATM pin. No. I tried his name, his car number plate, his initials, his mobile number. Nothing worked. Frustrated, I sat for a few minutes.
What would he use? Something obvious to him, but not to me. Something he wouldn’t expect me to know. He sometimes kept his year of birth as part of a password. Not the safest idea. What else would he use? Not my name, of course, but what about Bianca?
Two hits and I was in.
I whooped. ‘Yes!’ He hadn’t anticipated a need to change his security measures.
His payslip file was first.
I’d never needed to see his payslips. I managed our joint accounts. Our salaries arrived every fortnight. Eddie’s pay hadn’t changed in the last eighteen months.
I frowned. His income increased each year, but not last year. Why? His records were meticulous, everything he’d earned was recorded over the previous five years, since he began working at his current job. I scrolled through, puzzled. There was nothing out of the ordinary, until I opened a subfile labelled “Promotion”.
My stomach turned to ice. His pay had increased more than thirteen thousand pounds per annum.
Eight months ago.
And he’d said nothing to me.
A big promotion. A huge sum of money.
A promotion he hadn’t celebrated with me. Or our friends. Anyone who knew would have mentioned his good fortune. Except Tony. He had to know. I pushed that thought aside for now.
Why would he keep it a secret?
Well, duh, because he didn’t want to share his new earnings with me. A blade went through my heart. Half anger, half anguish. Breathless, I silenced threatened sobs. An inkling of where this was going scythed through me.
Even after tax that would be a sizeable sum. What had he done with it? My brain went into overdrive as I visualized Bianca’s expensive gifts.
Bloody hell.
Now I was in his files, I looked for other evidence. Proof that Eddie was lying to me on a scale I could never have imagined in my wildest dreams.
Make that my wildest nightmare.
The date of his pay increase was a fortnight after our honeymoon. Before he started his sneaky affair. Or had it already begun?
Around the time he joined the gym. That had to mean something. I pushed the thought to one side for the moment, too intent on finding more evidence.
Now I was in his personal stuff, I found an electronic trail of his deceit.
Credit card statements, emailed to him and saved in documents under “Fitness Goals”. Another innocuous subfile. I dug deeper.
Stunned, I found he was servicing two credit cards. Cards I knew nothing about. From banks where I thought we had no accounts. I gasped, breathless, lightheaded. One had maxed out at four and a half thousand pounds, the other was close to its limit of eight thousand pounds.
With fumbling fingers, I scrolled through the debits on the statements, scrambling to understand.
Taking deep breaths, I returned to the top of the page.
It wasn’t hard to see Eddie had needed help hiding this money. Regular debt repayments had been made, but not from any bank account I knew about.
Clicking back, I brought up more statements. Barclay’s personal account statements, not HSBC. We’d been with HSBC since he moved into my house. Monthly income and expenditure statements from Barclays had arrived for the last eight months. Every fortnight on his payday a sum of three hundred and thirty-six pounds went into this account.
Oh. My. God.
Cold, unsettling fear lodged in my gut. Who would help him with this kind of deceit? Tony?
Of course, Tony. Everything clicked into place. Tony worked in payroll at Eddie’s accountancy firm. Of course he’d helped. He’d known about Bianca. From the start.
Shit.
Oh shit. Did Lisa know?
Of course, she did. I didn’t even need to think about it. The Christmas shopping debacle proved it. Gloating at my expense.
Four people had kept this hideous secret. I’d trusted three of them.
Never Bianca.
Surrounded by betrayal and treachery I started shaking.
Such devious cruelty. Such malice. Bianca had always been malicious. Not Lisa. Until now. And now Eddie. And Tony – his betrayal hurt. I’d never had anything but respect for him.
Icy prickles covered my scalp. Bianca had flaunted her prowess in bed with a married man. My husband.
If there’d been anything left to upchuck, I’d be throwing up in the bathroom. Waves of hot humiliation shot through me – Eddie thought I was useless in bed. Bianca wanted me to know that.
Lisa, basking in her secret knowledge, wanting me to know it, too. When had she become such a vicious bitch?
Bianca had converted two weak people into sly, deceitful, back-stabbing vipers.
Congratulations, bitch. There’s a special place reserved for you in hell.
Agonized, I sobbed. I wanted to tear off my own skin. My fingers dug into my arms, scratching, leaving red welts. I stared at them, numbed. I hadn’t drawn blood. I didn’t really care. I scratched my arms again, then slapped my face a few times, sobbing, pulling my hair until it hurt too much. I sagged against the desk, head drooping.
What had I done to deserve this?
I crawled out of the seat and huddled in a corner with the blanket over my head, feeling utterly worthless. Squashed in a fetal position, my brain shut down. Jumbles of images flickered. I barely registered them, my mind forming a protective wall against each image.
Dawn was still far away when I crawled out of my cave, feeling old and aching. I sat in front of the computer, shivering, not really seeing the screen.
I knew I wasn’t a bad person. But my own husband, a man who’d promised to love and honor me, to cleave only to me, had turned every precious moment into a hideous joke.
Had Bianca always succeeded in turning decent people into malignant bastards?
Tony had helped Eddie’s deception. Deep down, though, I thought perhaps he hadn’t been happy about it.
Deception. How far back did it go? So soon after our wedding seemed out of character, at least, for the man I thought I was marrying. Not once before our wedding had I doubted him.
But what if deceit was his true nature and I’d never seen it? Had marriage been the means to some end I couldn’t see? A niggling suspicion surfaced. Had he married me for this house? The house I’d bought five years ago?
He’d been paying a share of the mortgage, not renting from me, but we hadn’t formalized the situation. His name wasn’t on the deeds.
With a family of highly skilled lawyers, I knew the law. And Eddie was going to have a surprise. One he wouldn’t like. He wanted this house. Well, we’ll see.
Something else niggled at the back of my mind. On our honeymoon. Women flirting with
him and Cal. They’d made me laugh. But what if flattery had turned his head? Unbidden, I remembered Mona warning me to look after Eddie. And Cal’s scorn towards Eddie on our last night at the resort.
I sat back with a jolt. Had Eddie been unfaithful? Even on our honeymoon? Is that what Cal had seen, or guessed? Or somehow known?
Before the wedding? Maybe I should ask Shona and Brigid. They weren’t fans of my husband. I’d never asked why. I hadn’t wanted to know. More fool me.
As I sat thinking, the screen in front of me gradually came into focus. A credit card statement. For long moments I didn’t register anything. Then, like a slow rumble of thunder, I realized what I was seeing.
More proof.
‘Oh, my God,’ I whispered into the empty room. ‘I never knew you at all.’
On the screen a sum of five thousand, one hundred and ninety-nine pounds stood out. Spent on a single item.
A car.
For a split second I wanted to deny the truth before my eyes. But I couldn’t. Bianca’s second-hand car, bought last year – I looked at the date – in time for Christmas. The car she’d proudly displayed to all of us.
Bought for her by my husband.
Heart pounding in my ears, I took short, shallow breaths. How dare he? All the while I’d been scrimping and saving for a holiday now only three and a half months away – oh God – I didn’t even want to think about that right now. I’d skipped buying lunches, lattes, books, in fact, virtually anything, so we could have an overseas holiday. And what had Mr-I’m-saving-too been doing? Buying gifts for another woman.
My inaction of the last few hours was replaced by swift action.
I’d locked the bastard out of our house, but what about money still in the bank?
My hands stilled for a moment. I drew deep, calming breaths.
Think.
What could I do?
The answer came quickly.
He hadn’t yet thought to clear our accounts. Thank God for internet banking.
I logged on and transferred every penny from our joint account into my own account, where holiday money was acquiring modest interest. Without hesitation, I changed my password, one he’d never guess, locking my husband out. He could use his secret account to pay for his new life.
Good.
He’d be enraged. A bitter laugh escaped, startling me. Silence had been my companion overnight, not any more.
With money salted away from Eddie and Bianca’s greedy hands and his clothes in tatters, I felt a modicum of control.
The feeling was transitory.
Tucked away, another subfile labelled “Personal” caught my attention. Personal – now what?
I opened it. A shockwave ripped through me, hands trembling, I froze.
Photos. Pornographic photos. Of him. Of Bianca. Close to the camera lens his erection looked enormous, photos of her, legs splayed, leaving nothing to the imagination. At least a dozen photos, the sort you send on a mobile phone. And delete. Or save elsewhere and delete from a phone. They’d been having phone sex when they weren’t together. Sexting.
Maybe even while I was at home. I shuddered, as if ants were crawling all over me.
Sickened, I started to closed the file, wanting to block the images. And then stopped, eyes glimpsing something else, mouth dropping open.
Another woman. Similarly displaying herself for the camera.
She looked familiar. From her face – I didn’t recognize the rest of her. Wearing a sly smile, and nothing else. Like a lightning bolt I knew it was Mona, one of the flirts in Hawaii.
My body went numb. Even my cheeks. And my mouth.
Not a single moment of our marriage had been real. Revulsion replaced every memory. Nothing about us had meant anything to him. Nothing.
I tried out my first words in hours. ‘My marriage was a sham. Before it even happened.’
What marriage? From Hawaii and right up to now, Eddie had piece by piece whittled away at my self-esteem.
Like slow-rolling thunder it dawned on me that Bianca hadn’t been chasing Eddie. It was the other way around. I’d never known him.
How many others before Mona? And after? And now?
Fingers clicking on older files within the subfile, I found more photos. Each photo had a name and a date. Four other women. The pornographic content disgusted me, but these women predated our relationship, apart from one. Her photos were dated within the first month of meeting Eddie.
I needed to tell someone. Irresolute, I stood and nearly keeled over, my vision darkened and the room spun. I held onto the desk until it settled. I’d had nothing to eat or drink since an apple at lunch yesterday.
I gagged, the idea of food made me nauseous.
In the kitchen I made tea and toast, forcing each bite and sip, breathing deeply before each mouthful. Gradually, my stomach accepted sustenance.
Six-o-clock. Julie needed to know I’d be a no-show for work. She was on her way when I called. I heard her pull the car over to listen.
I told her no more than the basics. Everything else would be for Dominic. My divorce lawyer brother.
‘My dear, I’m so sorry. Thank you for letting me know.’
‘I’m sorry to do this at the last minute. It’s been the shittiest night of my life.’
‘Of course. Now don’t you worry. Your distress yesterday was obvious. I guessed you’d need time off today. I called Andrea after you’d gone. She’s available for a week. After what’s happened for you, I’ll take her up on that. You need to sort out what’s best for you.’
‘Thank you.’
A burden of responsibility lifted.
My parents next
‘Sorry to wake you, Mum, but I need you.’ Tears dripped off my chin, soaking a fresh t-shirt.
‘What is it, darling?’
‘Eddie’s left me.’
A sharp intake of breath. ‘Oh, darling.’ A world of heartfelt love was in those two words, and instantly I was sobbing.
Sobbing with humiliation. Broken-hearted didn’t feature.
‘Stay where you are, sweetheart. We’re on our way over.’
Thank God for my parents.
Feeling old and slow, I showered and dressed and was ready when mum and dad arrived. Mum swept me into her arms, holding my shaking body. Dad, just behind her, wrapped his arms around both of us.
‘C’mon,’ he said after a few minutes. ‘I think strong coffee is essential right now.’
With my parents’ arrival I felt safe again. And loved.
I poured out the story. Dad barked a harsh laugh when I told him the contents of the sodden cardboard boxes on the lawn.
‘Serve the little bastard right. He’ll get a welcome he doesn’t expect when he turns up here.’
‘He won’t dare show his face. Not with our car parked on the drive,’ Mum said. ‘More’s the pity. I’d like to wipe that self-satisfied look off his smug little face.’
‘You never really liked him, did you?’ I don’t think I was surprised. I’d always known.
‘Not even a little bit. And certainly not now. Two-faced toad.’ Mum’s lips were pinched with anger. ‘As for Bianca, well, if I’d guessed how much she’d betray you, I’d have had her arrested for theft when you were still at school.’
‘You knew?’
‘Of course we did. We didn’t interfere because we knew your heart was in the right place. Even when she was at her worst, you still gave her more support than anyone else would have given her.’ Mum nodded at Dad. ‘Ben was all for seeing her go through the court system to learn a few lessons. We knew you wouldn’t want that. She might have ended up like her brother, in and out of prison.’
‘And now look what she’s done. I wish I’d seen it your way, Dad.’
They exchanged significant looks.
‘No, darling. Your heart remains pure, you’ve always been our true daughter.’
Surprised, I blinked. That didn’t sound like me at all.
‘What Mum means is you g
ave unselfishly. You learned harsh lessons, but you should never regret giving love to someone.’
‘But I do. I regret meeting Eddie. You haven’t heard everything yet.’
I told them about my overnight revelations.
‘The dirty little bastard.’ Dad shot to his feet. ‘I’d like to punch his pretty face to pulp.’
I managed a watery smile at that.
‘I did punch his nose. I hope I broke it. I certainly made it bleed. Oh, and I’ve protected myself. Financially, I mean. I removed all the money from our joint accounts. He can’t access my accounts anymore.’
‘Good girl.’ Dad sat down with a thump, thinking. After a moment, he said, ‘Show me everything he thinks he’s hidden. We’ll print off all his credit card statements, all the money he’s spent on gifts and we’ll get Dominic to go after him.’
This time I managed a tight smile.
‘Good thinking.’
‘You’ll want Dom for the divorce.’ Mum stated this as self-evident.
‘Of course. He’s the best divorce lawyer around. I bet Eddie hasn’t thought of what Dominic will do to him.’
Dom would really hurt Eddie’s back pocket. Hah!
We printed off three copies of Eddie’s little secrets and saved everything on a USB. Grim-faced, I was proud to be one step ahead of Eddie. I held the print-offs aloft.
‘He hasn’t thought of it yet. But Eddie’s going to find it’s too late to change his passwords.’ This time I managed a genuine smile.
‘Evidence.’ Dad took the paperwork from me, clipping it together. ‘Now let’s see the prick wriggle.’
‘You’re a high court judge, Dad. You can’t be seen involving yourself in this questionable behavior. I’ll keep a copy and give the rest to Dominic. You have to be squeaky clean.’
Mum nodded agreement.
He handed over the paperwork with a wry twist to his lips.
‘Of course. But I can advise you, unofficially, of course. My advice is to get this to Dominic today.’
‘I’m on it. I’ll call him soon.’ I glanced at the clock. ‘Thank you both for being here, I’d still be having a pity party without you here.’
Dad called Dominic, giving him the basics. He was on board straight away, his razor-sharp mind asking all the right questions.
Promises Made- Promises Kept Page 19