Eluding Fate

by Delilah Mohan

  “What about makeup? I could come over and do your make up,” Raylee insisted.

  “I’ve got it Ry. I’m going with the minimal approach. If you did my makeup, it would probably lean more toward the night time corner of 9th and Main Street type variety,” I said as a clinched bobby pins in my teeth.

  “What does that mean?” came from in front of me.

  “Yeah, what does that mean, Mari?” came Spencer’s voice from a few feet away.

  I shot him a glare over my shoulder. “It means Raylee likes a bolder look, honey.”

  “Oh.” She was silent a moment before continuing. “There is this girl in my class that gets to wear makeup. She uses a lot of bold colors, too. When Spencer finally lets me wear makeup, I think I want to do it like her.”

  “Like hell, you will,” Spencer shot toward us.

  Raylee and I laughed hysterically until finally Raylee stopped and exclaimed, “Hey speaking of makeup, I was reading this article the other day that states a girl’s ideal lipstick color should be the exact same color as her nipples. It’s the color meant to look best on her. You should make sure you match it before applying yours tonight.”

  I heard Spencer make a choking sound seconds before water sprayed across the room. There was rustling before Spencer’s chest was flush against my back as he reached over me toward my phone. “Alright Raylee, I think I can get our girls off just fine. She’ll call you tomorrow.” Then he hung up on her before she could respond. Pulling his hand away from the phone, he used it to turn my head, so we were making eye contact. “Do not . . . I repeat . . . do not match your lip color to your nipples.”

  A sly grin came over Victoria’s face as she stood up and walked toward the mirror I had hanging by the entryway. She tilted her head at various angles, inspecting my work before announcing her approval. “Thanks for doing my hair. We can go home now Spencer. You didn’t have to follow me here.”

  “I think we should stay. Go get your dress. I bet Mari wants to see what you look like with your dress and accessories on, too.” Spencer sighed as he plopped down on the couch.

  “She already saw it, she helped buy it,” she protested.

  I saw him give her a glare, really using that eye contact he had been working on before she rolled her eyes and stomped out of my apartment. It was less than two minutes before she was back with her garment bag in hand and the tote containing shoes and accessories. She gave Spencer another unpleased look before throwing herself into a chair.

  “You can get ready in my room, with me, if you want. Or you can use the guest bathroom,” I suggested, trying to break some tension. She picked up her bags and stormed past, rushing down the hall to my bedroom. I turned to follow, giving Spencer one last glance before leaving the room.

  Victoria already had her dress half on by the time I got to my bedroom, I, on the other hand, hadn’t even started my preparations. She sat on the edge of the vanity in my bathroom while I applied curlers to my hair, put on my makeup, and picked out a deep cherry lipstick to match my dress.

  “You two have been getting along a little better lately, right?” I nudged her a bit with my shoulder as a leaned over to apply my lipstick.

  “He’s alright.” She sounded annoyed, but I contributed it to her not getting her way.

  “He cares,” I offered right before I bit down on a piece of toilet paper, then smacked my lips.

  A huffing sound came from her direction, “I know.”

  “I’m going to get dressed and pull these out of my hair. Shoo.” I motioned her toward the bathroom door. “I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

  I closed the door behind her before delicately removing the rollers from my hair, careful not to tangle them. Giving them a nice coat of hairspray, I then carefully pinned the side up with a crystal encrusted pin before slipping on my dress. I exited the bathroom while still struggling to put my silver strappy heels on, determined not to fall in the process.

  When I finally looked up, Victoria was staring at me with her mouth open. “What?”

  “You look amazing. Spencer is going to flip out.” She circled me, her eyes wide.

  “I really doubt Spencer will care either way, but you, you are rocking it, kid. When was the last time he saw you in a dress?” I picked a piece of lint off her shoulder as I smoothed it down a bit.

  “It’s probably been a few years. I prefer jeans.”

  I let out a long breath that caused my hair to flutter, “Don’t we all.”

  “Are you nervous?” she asked, inquiring about my date, not date, I had with her teacher. I didn’t want to outright lie to her because I was nervous. I had put off dating for years, and I knew at some point I needed to jump back into the dating pool, I just wasn’t sure if I was ready for that some point to be today.

  “I’m a little nervous, but I know all will be fine. Devon is a nice guy,” I confessed.

  “He likes you. He asks about you every day, even on the days when he knows you aren’t picking me up. He also checks out the window for your car so he can say hi when class ends.” If he wasn’t adorable in a puppy dog sort of way, I might get a little bugged out about his stalker vibes.

  “Are you ready to go show your uncle?” I was attempting to distract her.

  Her lips snarled in displeasure. “I guess.”

  “How about I just get my jewelry on and I’ll meet you out there?”

  I was pretty sure she rolled her eyes the moment I turned my back, but she still grumbled a fine as she stomped out of the room awkwardly on her preteen-friendly wedges. I put on my earrings and necklace before following Victoria out. When I entered the living room, their chatter stopped immediately, all eyes focused in my direction. I pulled at my dresses hem, knowing it wasn’t too short but suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious.

  I wasn’t going to let my feelings of inadequacy steal the confidence that I had slowly gained since my divorce. It was a struggle, every day was a battle to be stronger than the last, and with their eyes on me, I had to prove to myself that none of it mattered. All that mattered was how I felt and what I thought, and up until a few moments ago . . . I felt amazing.

  Straightening my back, I met their gazes head on, “So, do you like it?” I asked as I did a complete turn while I stood only a few feet in front of them.

  Spencer’s mouth opened and closed a few times like he was a fish out of water. Finally, Victoria elbowed him in the ribs, jolting him out of his stupor. “Your dress is amazing,” he stumbled the words out.

  “But . . .” I prompted, preparing myself for the negative.

  “But, nothing. You look beautiful.” Victoria nodded her head beside him. She’d just stopped nodding when a knock sounded at my door.

  “Well, I guess it’s too late to change if I didn’t, right?” I reached for my little black clutch sitting on the end table and started walking toward the front door.

  Spencer’s arm shot out, stopping my stride. “You look amazing, beyond anything I could have imagined, Mari. But, don’t you think you should put on a shawl to cover up a little?”

  His eyes fell to my breasts and locked on, my eyes following his gaze. “My cleavage is a hundred percent covered, Spencer. Why do I need a shawl?”

  “Because . . .” his voice paused like he had lost his train of thought. He cleared his throat, “Because, the dress is tight around your . . .” He looked up toward Victoria, who was smirking a few feet away. Using his hand, he gestured to my boobs, “All those preteens will be looking at your breasts.” It came out as a harsh whisper, but I was sure the twelve-year-old heard him just fine.

  “Which are fully covered,” I clarified.

  “But, the outline is still just as enticing,” he confessed.

  Another knock sounded from the other side of the door and ignoring Spencer’s comment, I reached out and pulled the door open. Devon stood just on the other side of my doorway, holding a bouquet of flowers and wearing a big cheesy grin.

  “I thought a beautiful girl li
ke you needed some beautiful flowers,” he stated as he leaned toward me and kissed my cheek. Victoria gagged in the background. Taking his eyes off me, he gazed toward my living room. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you had people over. Hi Victoria, I hope you have your math packet done by Monday.”

  She let out a sound of utter disgust and fell back down on the couch. “Believe me, it will be done,” Spencer cut in.

  The two men stared at each other for what seemed like a long drawn out eternity before Devon offered his hand to shake Spencer’s. Devon let out what had to be the most awkward laugh I’d ever heard before asking Spencer, “So, do I have her home by midnight? I’m not exactly sure how this meeting the neighbor thing goes. I’ve only ever had to deal with parents.”

  Without missing a beat Spencer shot back, “I prefer nine, ten if you really want to push it.”

  Devon graced us with another one of his awkward laughs again. “Right. It’s a joke,” he stated as his eyes followed up the length of the much taller Spencer. Spencer didn’t reply, instead, he let the uncomfortable tension stifle the room.

  Rescuing Devon from his obvious discomfort, I laid my flowers on the end table and grabbed his hand. “He’s joking. I don’t have a curfew. Spencer, when you guys are done here, please make sure to lock the door. Victoria, I’ll see you in a few hours when the dance starts.” I pushed Devon toward the door and grabbed the knob to close it, “Both of you, please behave in the meantime.”

  I closed the door, not waiting for a reply. But, despite my haste to exit the unfavorable tension, I still couldn’t help but hear a very male, very Spencer, humph at the exact moment the door closed, sounding very much like his niece.

  Chapter Sixteen

  SPENCER

  Logically, I knew I was acting ridiculous. Devon was a teacher; screened from being a creep, but as the hours grew closer to her date, I grew more uncomfortable with the situation, and I just knew it was my duty to protect her.

  The longer I sat there waiting for Victoria to get ready for her dance, the more it seemed important that I stay. So, I stayed. And I waited. And when Mari finally came out of the room on those silver heels sans glasses, wearing a red dress that had to be made specifically for her, I felt my stomach knot. Her hair fell down her back in perfect auburn waves, so completely unlike the messy buns and ponytails she usually wore, that I wished I could see more of it this way. Maybe feel it, test out for myself if the strands were as silky as they looked from a distance.

  When she neared, I nearly choked, trying to push Raylee’s conversation out of my head, but I couldn’t. I needed to know, but I wouldn’t be able to handle the actual answer. Did her lipstick, that luscious shade of an almost electric red, match her nipples? The thought was driving me crazy like it was almost our own private secret.

  That was, until the knock at the door. Right on time, might I add, which was both respectable and so unbelievably annoying. Suddenly, it didn’t matter if her lipstick matched her nipples, all that mattered was someone else might know. That thought didn’t settle well with me. She didn’t belong to me, but I still felt like she was mine in some way, and I didn’t think anyone else had earned private information and glimpses into her life. No one else had earned her time like I had.

  Her dress was perfect, sticking to her like a second skin, and she was covered in all the right places, but I still didn’t want her date getting the wrong idea. This was a middle school dance after all. When she opened the door, he was consumed by her beauty, and damn if I wasn’t irritated that he completely disregarded all that surrounded him. Thankfully, Victoria broke the silence before I had a chance, bringing his focus elsewhere.

  There was something so undeniably challenging about letting her go, letting her walk out that door, smiling and happy with a date. To say I wasn’t thrilled with that idea was probably an understatement, but I didn’t really have a say in the matter either. So, instead, when she took his hand and lead him outside and closed the door, shutting me out, I breathed out my frustration having no right to let the feelings that were bouncing around inside of me take hold.

  Victoria’s presence behind me shook me from my trance-like state. Placing her hand on my shoulder, she shook her head at the door, while stating dreamily, “Did you see how gorgeous she looked tonight? She’s totally going to get kissed.”

  I spent the rest of the evening contemplating why that statement bothered me so much. At seven forty exactly, as I urged Victoria down the stairs of the complex to the car, I walked around with my brows completely furrowed. At seven fifty-one, when I was two minutes behind my estimated driving schedule because I got stuck at the light by the train tracks, I couldn’t even concentrate on my annoyance for running late because Mari kept popping up in my mind, her red locks cascading down her back and over her shoulders in a vision of absolute perfection. And when we pulled up, nearly ten minutes late, and I parked the car in one of the farthest rows in the lot, my mind kept replaying Victoria’s declaration of Devon, kissing her. When I finally exited the car and slammed the door, I was sure steam was rising from my skin.

  “What has you in such a bad mood?” Victoria asked as she leaned against the car, adjusting the straps on her wedges.

  “I’m not in a bad mood,” I snapped back.

  “Is it because Mari had a date?” She hit the nail on the head, but I couldn’t give her the power of knowing that.

  “No. I hate social functions,” I grumbled.

  “You don’t have to stay. In fact, I prefer you didn’t.”

  “You not wanting me to stay only makes my desire to linger stronger, you know.”

  She blew some hair out of her eyes, “I figured.”

  We started walking toward the school’s gymnasium, “I only want to check it out for a few minutes, then I’ll leave you alone, okay? The parent in me wants to make sure you are safe,” I lied, I wanted to make sure Mr. Math Geek wasn’t getting handsy with my girl.

  My Girl.

  I paused midstride. Wasn’t that what she was? At the end of the day, when all things were stripped away, and it was just us, lounging in our pajamas, eating ice cream from the carton, weren’t we a pair? A pair of something? Maybe something unspoken, but it was there. It had to be there because suddenly I felt it, I felt the jealousy and anger watching another man touch her, and I knew, deep down, she belonged to me.

  “Are you coming?” Victoria called from ten feet in front of me, “The sooner you lurk on my dance, the sooner you’ll leave.”

  I jogged the distance between us, slowing my pace once I reached her side. We walked the rest of the way through the parking lot in silence, her . . . probably nervous about her date with Liam Myers, a little prick of a kid that I absolutely knew would break her heart, but heaven forbid she let me shield her. Me, I was lost in my new-found thoughts of what it would be like for Mari to be mine, more than she already was.

  We entered the double doors and traveled down the short hall to where the dance was being held, following the music that grew progressively louder the closer we got. Passing under the balloon arch, we entered a room filled with overly loud music, flashing lights, and a thousand different perfumes mixed with tween sweat and desperation. I shouldn’t miss this time of my life, no one really misses middle school, but memories of Simon flashed through my mind, a hundred tiny imagines, and I wished more than anything I could go back. To float back to a time like this when life was so much simpler, and worries were trivial.

  “She’s over there.” Victoria took my arm and pulled me to the side, then used her finger to point in the direction of the back-left corner of the gym.

  “Who?” I was confused, not quite shaken from my memory.

  “Mari. You did come here to spy on her, right?” She was smart and observant, probably more than I wanted her to be.

  “No. I did not come to spy on her. That’s ridiculous.”

  “Uh-hum, well you sure look interested in gazing in that direction,” she pointed out.

&n
bsp; “Look, don’t you have a squeaky-voiced dweeb to find and dance with?” I tried to give her my stern eyes, but her knowing smile said that my glare had no effect on her.

  “Fine, fine. I’ll go. I’ll leave you to your creepy, stalking, lurks . . . but remember, there’s a whole wall of moms over there eyeing you like they haven’t had a steak in ages . . . and the famous Spencer Sully is Kobe beef.” She patted my back slowly, and I didn’t bother denying it any longer.

  “Five minutes, ten tops, then I’m leaving. I just want to make sure he is treating her right. You know, because we are friends and all.”

  She began to walk away toward the crowd of people, turning and walking backward she said, “Sure. I believe you, really I do.”

  Then Victoria was gone, disappearing into the mass of bodies, taking her perceptive grin with her. I traveled along the wall opposite the waiting moms, heading in the direction Victoria had pointed out, and hoping to get just a tiny glimpse of Mari without her seeing me. It took me a few minutes to spot her. She was on the dance floor, dancing with the teacher with a space that most definitely didn’t follow the regulated foot rule that teachers enforced when I was in middle school.

  Okay, there were like two inches between them, but the thought of their closeness made my throat tight. I watched as he whispered something in her ear, brushed a stray piece of her glowing hair off her shoulder as he did so, and I knew I shouldn’t feel so angry, but I did. I was infuriated that he was trying to take her away from me, consuming the time on her Saturday that was usually dedicated to me.

  I watched as he continued his dance, whispering to her, making her laugh in a way I wasn’t sure I’d ever done. But I wanted to. No, not just wanted, I truly needed to make her laugh because even from a distance, that sound was damn close to musical. How did I not notice this before? How did I miss this? Did I just become too comfortable with what we were that I feared the change of more?

  The truth, whether I was ready to admit it to myself or not, was simple. From the moment I first met her, there had been something about her that drew me in. She and the Jot Wall were the only two things that made me truly happy and to have both things in one place, I would have been insane not to hold on to her. But my error was in how I did it.