by Lisa Hobman
‘The fact is I don’t need to work, Tim. I choose to work. I don’t want to be a kept woman. I want something for myself and that’s why I run my own business. A successful one too, I might add. And as Sarah said this is none of your damn business. You don’t know Seth personally and you’ve only just met me. So you can keep your opinions to yourself.’ Cassie stood from the table and placed down her half-finished drink. ‘I think I’m going to head to bed, guys. Thanks for a lovely evening.’
The rest of the group bid her a goodnight and once she had walked away she heard them begin to chastise the errant Tim for his arrogance and ignorant, unfounded observations. Cassie smiled to herself as she walked out of the pub. But as she made her way back to the dorm block worry niggled at her. Why were people so judgemental? Just because she was a young woman marrying an older, wealthy man didn’t mean she was some kind of gold digger. She hoped this wasn’t how the world—well Seth’s world anyway—viewed her.
*
The following day was an intense, full Saturday. Tim stayed out of her way and she was relieved for that fact alone. She found the work useful and regardless of the arse she had encountered, she was glad she had attended. During the day she discovered that an amendment had been made to the schedule and that they would be finished by mid-morning on Sunday—more than half a day earlier than originally stated—meaning she would be home to Seth just after lunch. To say this was a relief was an understatement.
That evening, after a long day of studies she made her way to the local supermarket, choosing a take-out bowl of salad and mini bottle of wine over another meal and drinks session with the likes of opinionated Tim and she was curled up in bed by ten thirty.
*
The final morning of the course was light-hearted and fun. And the moments ticked by rapidly until it was time for Cassie to head back to her room to gather her belongings. She shoved her possessions into her case and after applying lip gloss and combing her hair she left. The morning was cooler than the previous day and she considered texting Seth to tell him she was looking forward to letting him warm her up. Although on second thought I’ll leave my early return as a nice surprise. She smiled at the thought.
On the walk to the station she came across a little lingerie boutique and paused to peruse the window display. In a moment of impulsiveness she pushed open the door and walked in. Before her were rails filled with lace garments and tastefully dressed mannequins displaying the sexy yet classy underwear. She selected something she had a feeling Seth would love to see her in—and quickly get her out of—and with a little shyness she took it to the desk and handed over her payment.
Once she had recovered from her embarrassment she set off again towards Waverley Train Station, making sure to call in at the mini supermarket to collect wine and chocolates. She grinned to herself as the plans for her afternoon and evening ahead formed in her mind. Seth would no doubt be out when she arrived home, giving her plenty of time to reapply her makeup and tidy up her hair so that she could be waiting for him in bed when he returned. Maybe I should be impulsive more often, she thought as a shiver of excitement sent goosebumps across her skin.
The train journey, typically, seemed to take forever and to make matters worse Cassie had to stand for the majority of it. At one point she narrowly escaped landing in the lap of a poor elderly chap as the train jerked out of one station. When the train eventually pulled into Glasgow she grabbed her newly acquired goody bags and tugged her case along behind her as she left the hot metal tin that had been her torturous transport for the last hour.
The Glasgow that greeted her was a wet and dreary one and she flagged down a cab as quickly as she could. Once safely ensconced in the warm vehicle she stuck in her earbuds and rifled through her playlists. She was determined to listen to something that she hoped would lighten the mood and get her ready for her evening of passion. A little Kings of Leon would do the trick.
She pulled out her compact from her handbag and assessed her flat hair and pale face. Thanks to the crappy weather she would have to take extra time in the bathroom in preparation for her ‘Seduce Seth Guthrie’ mission. If he was home she would simply demand that he wait, naked in the bedroom. She giggled as she thought back to being called Miss Bossy Bottom. Well, maybe that needed to be the shape of things to come. It was about time her too often subdued assertive side took more of the limelight.
The cab pulled up outside her building and she paid the driver. As she looked through the bars of the underground car park she spotted Seth’s car. Dammit. Determined to continue with her plans she made her way up to their apartment in the lift and as quietly as possible she inserted the key in the lock and turned it. Another shudder of giddy excitement rippled through her and she had to stifle a nervous laugh. Good grief Cassie, get a grip. You’re engaged to the man.
There was no sign of Seth in the living room or kitchen so she figured he must be in the bedroom already. Perfect! She placed the wine and chocolates on the counter top in the kitchen and made her way into the main bathroom. She fluffed up her hair, reapplied her makeup and quickly undressed and slipped her sexy lingerie on before redressing. He’d no doubt want to unwrap her like the gift she was offering herself as. On the way back past the kitchen she uncorked the wine and grabbed a couple of glasses—the chocolates could wait until later.
Softly she tiptoed towards the bedroom and smiled as she heard the sound of Seth’s favourite opera drifting through the air. Taking a deep breath and adjusting her hold on the wine and glasses she opened the bedroom door.
Chapter Nine
As the door swung open Cassie gasped and the items she was holding slipped from her grasp. The glasses and the wine bottle crashed to the floor shattering on impact into tiny fragments on the oak boarding and sending pools of red in splatters up the wall and the door; a blood crimson contrast to the stark white that surrounded her. A horrified cry left her throat and her hands instinctively came to cover her mouth.
‘Cassie! Darling I can explain!’ her wide-eyed, panic-stricken fiancé exclaimed in assurance as he jumped up and grappled for the nearest item of clothing he could find. Then he hopped from foot to foot as he tugged it, absent-mindedly onto his bare legs.
It just so happened that what he had grabbed was a pair of Cassie’s best floral pyjama bottoms in a size twelve. He was a six-foot-two man who played rugby for fun. His thighs were like tree trunks and if she hadn’t just found him in bed with one of her closest friends the whole scene before her would have been hilarious. His long, muscular lower half squeezed into Cassie’s Marks and Spencer PJs was one of the most surreal images she had ever seen and she simply didn’t know how to react.
How could she?
The bizarre urge to laugh began to bubble up from somewhere twisted, deep within her. A place where clearly the news that Seth Guthrie was a cheating bastard hadn’t quite registered yet. As she stood there, gawping at the scene before her featuring her fiancé and Pippa, one of her best friends—two people she thought she knew—she wondered exactly how his supposed explanation would go. Would it be like one of those ridiculous insurance claims you read on Facebook memes where the driver insists that the tree came out of nowhere and hit them, not the other way around?
Thankfully the anger that should have manifested immediately began to make its way to the surface in a kind of delayed reaction; her heart hammered a beat all of its own against her rib cage and her stomach knotted so tightly she feared she may throw up.
She snorted in a very unladylike manner. ‘Oh, you can explain? This should be good.’ Holding her hands up to halt Seth’s imminent interruption she continued, ‘Wait! Let me guess eh? This should be fun. Okay… so…’ She tapped her chin in mock concentration, her hands shaking and the rest of her body juddering in unison.
‘Cassie, I—’
Her voice was loud and wavering. ‘No, no, I said I wanted to guess,’ she barked. ‘Okay, so here’s my theory… you were using our bed as a trampoline… no… no y
ou were conducting research into the strength of the mattress we’ve had for three years, you know to make sure it’s up to scratch. When all of a sudden, you bounced too vigorously, and all your clothes fell off causing you trip over your boxers and… and it was at that precise moment that your penis accidentally slipped into Pippa’s vagina repeatedly until the mattress stopped moving. Am I close?’ Her wide-eyed stare fixed on her fiancé for a moment. But then she shifted her attention to Pippa who had gathered the Egyptian cotton sheets and tugged them to cover her fake breasts.
Cassie’s nostrils flared. ‘And you! You bitch! You were supposed to be my friend. I listened to you talk about your husband being unfaithful and how heartbroken you were. I tried to talk you out of having your own affair. But if I’d even guessed for a second that you were going to choose my fiancé to have that affair with I would have blacked your eyes right then and there. You betraying piece of shit. How could you do this to me? Were you trying to tell me on that day, huh? In some twisted way were you trying to tell me you were intent on shagging my future husband?’ She stepped towards Pippa with her fists balled at her sides.
Pippa sat there, her red lipstick smeared around her face and her watery eyes flitting between Seth and Cassie, it was evident she had no clue how to respond. She backed up closer to the headboard of the ironically virginal white, designer bed and opened and closed her mouth like a dying goldfish before eventually finding words. ‘It… it wasn’t like that. I swear it wasn’t. I had no intention of having sex with Seth. It wasn’t like that,’ she stuttered, her voice wavering with either fear or emotion, it didn’t much matter which.
Cassie sneered like a rabid animal. ‘Yeah, you already said so. Are you going to tell me this is the first time you’ve had your little romp session?’
The two guilty parties shouted out simultaneously, but didn’t agree in their responses.
‘Yes, first time,’ was Seth’s reply.
Whilst Pippa blurted, ‘No it’s not, I wouldn’t lie to you.’
Seth slapped his hand over his eyes. ‘For fuck’s sake, Pippa.’
Pippa snapped at him, ‘Well, Seth, she deserves to know about us.’
Seth lifted his arms and let them flop to his sides in exasperation. ‘Pippa, there is no us. Jesus! We agreed it was just sex.’
Cassie observed this exchange with no small amount of incredulity. ‘Oh, don’t mind me, you two just carry on. Let me know when you’ve got your stories straight, won’t you?’
‘Cassie, poppet—’ Seth stepped towards her with his arms outstretched.
She jabbed her finger in his direction. ‘Don’t you dare come near me you lying bastard. And I’m not your fucking poppet, you patronising shit. I’ve always hated that stupid pet name. I’m a grown woman for fuck’s sake. And you are literally a pair of lying fuckers!’
‘Cassie, please stop swearing, darling. It’s not ladylike,’ Seth pleaded.
Cassie made a derisive scoffing sound. ‘Oh fuck off, you fucking arsehole.’
He sighed and plastered on a condescending smile. ‘Come on. Let’s all calm down. I’ll clean up this mess, Pippa can leave and you and I can talk, hmm? What do you say pop… erm… Cassie?’
Cassie’s blood raged beneath her skin as her heart pushed it around her body a lot faster than usual and she quivered as she gritted her teeth. ‘I’ll tell you what. You get your tart to help you clean it up, hmm? We wouldn’t want the oak to get stained, now would we? I mean, it’s much more important than our relationship.’
Seth gave a weak laugh. ‘Cassie, don’t you think you’re overreacting? Me and you… that’s what’s important. We can fix this. I know we can,’ he told her softly as he stepped towards her as if she was a cornered animal. ‘It was just sex. Just a release. Just once. That’s all. I don’t love Pippa. I love you. I’m marrying you.’ He reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear but she stepped back before he made contact.
Suddenly wondering why the hell she was even still there she scrunched her brow. ‘Seth, you’re not only a cheating bastard, you’re a condescending, self-centred shit-head too. And yes, that’s a fair bit of swearing right there. Now ask me if I care. And in case you weren’t paying attention, your bit on the side has already admitted that this isn’t a one-time thing. So, stop trying to brush it off like it was a spur-of-the-moment occurrence. I think my reaction is perfectly justified. We’re over. I’ll have my things collected.’
She turned and walked away only stopping to grab her coat and unpacked case from the living room and then headed for the door but he followed, still wearing her pyjama bottoms which were now stretched beyond recognition. Well they’re bloody ruined, she thought as she looked him up and down with disdain.
‘Look, we… that is Pippa and I, met to talk about the wedding. We got chatting about her and Jasper. One thing led to another…’ Cassie’s blank expression was no deterrent to his monologue. ‘She was more adventurous, that’s all… in bed I mean.’
Cassie dropped her jacket, drew her hand back and launched it full pelt at his face. There was a loud crack that echoed off the walls and she contorted her face. ‘Oh my God, what the hell makes you think I want to know the sordid details? You sick little man!’
Seth stood open-mouthed holding his bright red cheek for a moment then he reached out to touch her shoulder again and she flinched. ‘Cassie, you can’t leave. Don’t forget you have nowhere to go. Your life is here with me. I’m your life. In fact, without out me you don’t even have a life,’ he stated as if she should already know this; like it was common knowledge.
She inhaled a deep calming breath and lifted her chin defiantly. ‘Really? Well then, I can assure you that I’ll be on a mission from this moment to prove that there is life after Seth.’
And with that she pulled the door open and left.
Chapter Ten
Sitting alone in the first coffee shop she had come across whilst wondering aimlessly along Argyle Street, she stared into her mug playing over the awful scene that had greeted her at home. Seth’s words repeated over and over in her head like a stuck record. ‘Without me you have no life… without me you have no life…’ The terrible thing was she realised there was a very distinct possibility he was right.
When, exactly, had her life begun to revolve around Seth Guthrie?
Her dad had pointed out the same at her engagement party, albeit with a little more subtlety. But she knew deep down that she was to blame. She had facilitated Seth becoming the centre of her universe. She didn’t feel she needed anyone else. When she was growing up it was just her and her dad. And then along came Seth and she felt complete. And her dad had wanted a man like Seth for her, hadn’t he? Hadn’t he always talked about someone to protect her and care for her when he was no longer around? Wasn’t that what he’d meant? Why hadn’t she realised that he would never intend for her to lose her sense of self? She’d been so busy trying not to be the usual clumsy, haphazard Cassie Montgomery that she had in fact changed almost everything about her personality; her dress sense, her musical tastes, her free will as if doing so would make Seth love her more.
She’d been so damned spineless. When she looked back over the decisions that had been made for her she realised that she’d rolled over and shown her belly. She’d submitted to him like a dog to its alpha. Since meeting him she had apparently lost the ability to think for herself and to stand up for herself. But not only that, she’d lost the will to even try. And why was that? She surmised, on further analysis of her mind-set, that deep down she held onto an inherent fear that she would lose him if she asserted herself. Yet she’d lost him anyway. And perhaps ultimately it had been her fault. Perhaps in being so weak willed and insipid, she’d posed no challenge for Seth. Clearly she lacked excitement for him, causing him to stray. But surely that said more about him than it did about her? She’d kept her moral compass intact. The same couldn’t be said for her former fiancé.
As if a bright light switched on in her mind sh
e gasped at her train of thought and slammed her cup down onto the table as the word, ‘No!’ fell loudly from her mouth. She cringed and glanced up to find the other patrons staring in her direction and she raised her hand in apology before turning her attention back to her coffee. Why the hell was she questioning and blaming herself? Seth was the one who’d been unfaithful. If he was unhappy he should have told her and left her before putting his penis in another woman for goodness’ sake. Yes, he was the bastard here. He was the one who couldn’t keep it in his pants for a weekend whilst she was away studying. He must have a serious sex addiction if he couldn’t even wait two bloody days. And what exactly did he mean about Pippa being more adventurous? It’s not as if she’d walked in to find him hanging from the ceiling being bloody whipped. They were just having sex to bloody opera music. What was adventurous about that? It was pathetic really. Yet it held something of interest for him to make him unfaithful.
Her stomach roiled as that word rattle around her brain. Unfaithful. He had cheated. He had taken something precious and sullied it. Like Cassie meant nothing to him. But to make matters even worse, he had done so with someone Cassie had considered a close friend.
The waitress appeared and placed another latte and a chocolate chip cookie on the table before her. She hadn’t ordered either and looked up to explain that to her but the woman slipped into the booth opposite her and held up her hand. ‘Before you say anything, they’re on me. You’ve been sitting here nursing that one for ages now so it must be cold. And to be honest you look like you need cheering up.’
Cassie’s eyed welled up at the considerate gesture. ‘Thank you so much.’ What is it about the kindness of complete strangers that touches us so deeply? Something as simple as coffee and a biscuit almost restored her faith in humanity. Almost.
Tilting her head to one side the waitress whose name badge read Jean said, ‘Now judging by the look on your face I’m guessing you’ve either been dumped or cheated on. Sadly, I know the look all too well. But let me tell you this, love, whatever he or she has done to you, you didn’t deserve the heartache. So, whatever you do, don’t blame yourself. Now you give me a shout if you need anything else, okay?’ She stood to leave but waited for a response.