My Way Back to You: New York Times Bestselling Author

by Claire Contreras

  “Tessa?” I could hear the confusion in her voice. “Is everything all right? How are your parents? Freddie? I heard he was in an accident.”

  “They’re fine. Everyone’s fine. I’m calling about Rowan.”

  “Oh. What about him?” Her sudden icy tone gave me pause.

  “You aren’t aware of this because he hasn’t spoken to you,” I started, “but he has a son. With me. And I know you’re Camryn’s number one supporter, but I figured I’d call you and let you know that she isn’t allowed anywhere near my son, and neither is anyone who wishes me, him, or Rowan any harm.”

  “I . . . a son?” she whispered. “How . . . when . . . how old is he?”

  “He’ll be four soon.”

  “A four-year-old son, and I’m only just now hearing about this?” she asked, her voice growing louder.

  “Like I said, I don’t want him near anyone who wishes any of us harm.”

  “I’ve never wished you harm.”

  “No, you just wished I’d go away so that your son could be with the evil bitch he married.”

  “It was the right thing for him to do,” she said. “Camryn understood what was expected of her.”

  “Camryn is a disgusting human being who’s put Rowan through the wringer with this divorce. She also showed up at my son’s daycare and scared the daylights out of him. This is a courtesy call. If you can’t meet me halfway, I’m going to assume you want nothing to do with your grandson. For the record, I don’t care one way or another. As far as I’m concerned, he has more than enough love in his life.”

  “Does Alistair know?”

  I rolled my eyes just as Chloe walked into my office with a folder in her hand and a huge smile on her face.

  Medellin Fabrics signed, she mouthed with a thumbs-up. My smile was wide as I returned her thumbs-up enthusiastically.

  “Alistair knows.”

  “He told his father?” Mildred whispered.

  “From what I understand, you had a choice—your son or Camryn, and you chose wrong. It was nice catching up. I have to go. I have a lot of work to get done today.”

  I hung up before she could get another word in.

  Later that night, when Rowan came over, I told him what I did. He stared at me blankly from across the kitchen island.

  “How did you get her phone number?”

  “Sam.”

  He shook his head, still gaping. “Of course. Well, what did she say?”

  “I hung up on her.”

  “You hung up on my mother?”

  I shrugged. “It was an impulsive move, I know.”

  “That’s one way of putting it.” He chuckled. “That would explain the five phone calls I received and ignored from her today. I haven’t listened to the voice messages she left, but I can only assume they’re going to be very interesting.” He reached over and put his hand over mine. “Camryn called today.”

  I took my hand from under his on instinct. “And?”

  “And she apologized. She also said she hoped I was happy with my ‘crazy ass girlfriend,’” he air quoted. The way he said it made me laugh.

  “That doesn’t sound like much of an insult coming from her.”

  He scoffed. “There’s crazy and then there’s Camryn.”

  “Right.” We stayed quiet for a moment before I asked, “Do you think she’ll leave us alone?”

  “Yes. I really do. She also told me to apologize to you on her behalf.”

  “That I don’t believe.”

  “Why would I lie?” He walked around the island, stood behind me, and wrapped his arms around me, tucking his face into the crook of my neck.

  “I filed a petition for a name change,” I said, “for Miles.”

  Rowan pulled back, turned my chair to face him, and searched my eyes. “Really?”

  “Really.” I smiled, bringing my hand up to tickle his beard. “He should have his dad’s name, don’t you think? Keep the Hawthorne family name going and all that.”

  His eyes blurred with unshed tears as he nodded. “Thank you.” He wrapped his arms around me again, crushing me to him. “Thank you for this.”

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Tessa

  “Let’s go on the canoe,” Rowan said into my ear after lunch.

  I looked over at Miles, who was lying on the couch with Freddie. He was tracing the scar on my brother’s face, looking at him in awe for having survived that attack. He still hadn’t given us the details. Not that I’d expected him to. I was just happy he was with us.

  We’d all gone to my grandmother’s cottage for the weekend and Rowan was the only one who’d been on a canoe. He had been rowing back home on his machine, but it wasn’t the same. He explained exactly how countless times while I sat on my yoga mat staring at him as he rowed. It made me hot every time. Even the way his sweat trickled down his face was hot. The way his lips formed an O during his pull was hot. The way his back, legs, and stomach tightened with each motion.

  “I’ll go if you take off your shirt,” I said.

  He grinned. “I’ll take off more than just my shirt.”

  “TMI,” Freddie said from the couch. “We can hear you.”

  Miles sat up and glanced over. “Why would you take off all your clothes?”

  “Because Daddy’s weird,” I said.

  Rowan chuckled, slapping my ass.

  “What does motherfucker mean?” Miles asked, and my wide eyes shot in my son’s direction.

  Freddie cough-laughed. “Where’d you hear that?”

  “Daddy.”

  “Rowan,” I shot him a stern look, slapping his stomach.

  “You act like I called him that word.” Rowan rolled his eyes. He looked at Miles. “That’s a bad word, buddy. We don’t say that.”

  “You say it.”

  “Yeah, but I’m an adult.”

  “So?”

  “Adults are dumb sometimes. You can’t repeat everything we say.”

  Miles shrugged, a little nonchalant lift a shoulder, and looked at Freddie again. “Can we watch Minions?”

  “Again?”

  “Yes.”

  “Hey,” Rowan said. “What happens at the end of Frozen?”

  Freddie frowned deeply as he sat up. “How the eff am I supposed to know? You watch Frozen?”

  “I have a four-year-old. I’ve watched it. I keep falling asleep before it ends. Do Anna and Hans get married?”

  “Not every Disney movie ends in marriage,” I said.

  “Princess ones do,” Rowan argued.

  “Not all of them. Hello, Moana?”

  He shrugged, pulling my hand. “Let’s go.”

  I let him lead me outside and I waved at my parents and grandmother who were gardening. It was Mom and Grandma Joan’s favorite past time, and somehow Dad got dragged into it every time. Rowan went up to them, plucked a rose, and jogged back over to me.

  “Seriously, Rowan?” Mom called out. “I was about to plant it.”

  “I’ll get you another one tomorrow,” he called back. “I need to impress my girlfriend.”

  They laughed in unison. I shook my head, smiling as he handed me the rose. When we got to the canoe, I noted the little cushions with the tablecloth spread between them.

  “We just ate,” I said.

  “Can you just sit and enjoy this?”

  “Okay,” I said. “Do I get the paddles?”

  He shot me a glare. I put my hands up and let him row us away from the shore. He stopped in the middle, one of our usual spots, and exhaled.

  “It’s a nice day.”

  “It is,” I agreed, looking around. I stopped when I saw a new cottage. “That’s new.”

  “It’s cute,” he commented.

  “You should sell your apartment and get one so you can be closer to the water,” I suggested. “You’d be less grumpy.”

  “I’m not grumpy.”

  “Sometimes.” I fought a smile. He reached under the white tablecloth and pulled out a bottle of wi
ne and two glasses. I raised an eyebrow. “Color me impressed.”

  He chuckled. “Good.” He set them aside. I waited, but he didn’t move to serve it, so I closed my eyes and tilted my face toward the sun, breathing it all in. Long seconds passed before he said, “You are so beautiful.”

  I slowly opened my eyes at his tone, which was rough and gravely and full of heat. Rowan leaned forward, placing both hands on my knees, spreading them apart so he could settle between them, and then he put his forehead against mine and breathed out. I did the same, holding his hands on my lap.

  “Have I told you that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me?” he whispered.

  I nodded against him. “All the time.”

  “Have I told you that I think about you obsessively?”

  I laughed lightly. “No, that’s creepy.”

  “I’m a creep then, because you’re all I think about. Aside from Miles, but that goes without saying.”

  “I think about you creepily, obsessively too,” I admitted.

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I think I was thirteen when you bewitched me.” He pulled back slightly, his eyes searching mine. “You looked at me one of those Saturdays when I was visiting Monte and I thought you had to be the prettiest girl in the world.” He paused, his thumbs brushing against the backs of my hands. “I’ve traveled a lot since then and I have to say, I was definitely right about that.”

  I felt tears brim in my eyes. I tried to blink them back, but they trickled down my cheeks lightly. Ro brought a hand up and brushed them away.

  “I never believed in marriage,” he said. “Ultimately, it’s just a stupid piece of paper, but I really, really want to sign that stupid piece of paper with your name beside mine. When our kids grow up, I want to be able to look at them and say, ‘You see that woman over there? She has some serious magic and somehow, I was the one who caught it all.’” His Adam’s apple bobbed. “What I’m trying to say is that I love you, Tessa Monte. I bleed for you. You’re the only woman in the world who can make me believe that love exists. The only woman in the world I’d ever want tied to me for an eternity. The only woman I could ever envision raising my children. Please marry me.”

  “I bleed for you too,” I whispered, emotion clogging my throat. “Yes. I’ll marry you.”

  He reached under the tablecloth and brought out a small box before opening it to show me the most beautiful diamond I’d ever seen. His eyes held mine as he took it out and slipped it onto my finger. “I promise I’ll be the best husband I can. I promise to listen to you and help carry your burdens. I can’t promise that I’ll cook for you every night or rub your feet after a long day every night, but I promise that I’ll try. Above anything, I promise that I’ll always talk to you, always respect you, and always put you above everything, even my work, even myself.”

  I couldn’t even speak. I looked down at my shaky hand and the ring on it, and threw my arms around him, rocking the canoe back and forth. The wine rolled. When I finally sat in my side of the canoe, he grinned and nodded toward the shore, to the house I had pointed out earlier. “You see that little cottage they’re building?” He pointed at a house not much bigger than my grandmother’s. It was white with a lot of windows.

  “Yeah.”

  “It’s ours. They should be finished building next month.”

  I pulled back. “Are you serious?”

  “Dead serious,” he said. “I tried to buy your old house, but Sam talked me out of it. He said we needed new memories and I agree. This cottage will be a blank slate. New cottage, new family, new beginnings.” He kissed the tip of my nose and pulled away. “But the sculls stay. I can’t get rid of those.”

  I laughed. “I wouldn’t dream of asking you to. I can’t believe you built us a house here.”

  “Miles needs a place to see the stars,” he said, bringing his thumb up to my lower lip. “And we need a place to escape from the world.”

  I kissed him then, not because of the cottage and not because of the ring, but because of everything he was and everything he’d be.

  “You really do love me,” I said, smiling.

  “I don’t just love you, Sprite. I bleed for you. Only for you.”

  Epilogue

  Rowan

  “Dad, just let them play,” I said for the fourth time in a row.

  Dad, Mariah, and Harrison had come to the cottage for the day, and my dad just couldn’t let the kid run around like a normal twelve-year-old. He kept worrying he’d get hurt.

  “He will get hurt,” I said. “You know that, right?”

  Dad sighed heavily. “I’m too old for this.”

  I laughed. “As someone who grew up with you as my father, I’m going to have to disagree. You seem to be the perfect age for this.”

  He really was. He was attentive with both Mariah and Harrison. Samson and I still thought it was a little weird that we had a twelve-year-old brother, but we loved him and treated him like he was one of us, because he was. Mom was still living in London, but she visited once in a while. She said she didn’t want her grandkids not to know her. The environment seemed to quiet down when she was around, though, despite the fact that she’d remarried and seemed extremely happy with Harold.

  I watched Mom as she talked to Tessa, who was holding our one-year-old daughter, Luna, in her arms. The moment Mom glanced away, Tessa’s eyes found mine and widened.

  Get me out of here, she mouthed.

  I chuckled. It wasn’t that Tessa and my mom didn’t get along, it was that they didn’t agree on anything, but Mom loved Tessa. She’d said as much at our wedding. She also said she didn’t remember saying such horrible things to her in the past. She said it was too long ago and her memory was awful, but she admitted that she’d been wrong. We didn’t care. Camryn’s name was never brought up—ever. I didn’t know how she was doing and didn’t care. The only people who mattered to me were Miles, Luna, and Tessa. They were my world. Everything else could wait. My brother jogged over with a beer in each hand and handed one to me.

  “Freddie’s here,” he said. “Which means these will be gone in ten minutes.”

  I chuckled, taking a sip. “He said he stopped drinking because it was giving him a beer gut and he needed to have abs by June.”

  “Well, it’s July,” Sam said, raising an eyebrow. “And here we are.”

  “Fuck you.” I scowled. “My abs are fine.”

  Sam laughed, taking a sip of his beer. “So, what’s going on? Is Tessa going to leave Prim and come work with us full time?”

  “I think so.” I exhaled.

  I fucking hoped so. After our socks launched three years ago, we’d expanded RHS Designs and added winter hats and then gloves. I wanted to add a children’s clothing line to bring Tessa’s Mommy and Me and Daddy and Me idea to fruition. Problem was that she liked Prim. The sky-rise and the pay and the demand. We worked together pretty often anyway, this would just mean we’d work together ninety percent of the time instead of just fifty.

  “I’ll have to keep trying to convince her,” I said. “We’re finally done remodeling the house. That was step one. If she does come on board for this, I would want to open a boutique to sell everything in. Nothing big.”

  “That can work.” Sam nodded. “She’d like that.”

  “I think so.”

  “Chloe would probably want to leave with her,” he added. “Tessa was trying to get her promoted, but she seems to like working side by side with her.”

  I smiled. “Well, in that case, we’d have to make room for her.”

  “What in the world are you looking at?” he asked, looking at my phone. I pushed the side button quickly.

  “Nothing.”

  Samson chuckled loudly. “Tessa!”

  She glanced up, shot daggers at me, and then smiled at my brother for rescuing her from the conversation with my mom. She shifted Luna into my mom’s arms and headed our way.

  “Thanks for nothing,
” she said to me and then looked at Sam. “What’s up?”

  “I think Rowan has a problem.”

  “What?”

  “He’s obsessed with mommy boards.”

  Tessa’s eyes glimmered in amusement. She already knew this. We talked about it all the time because one freaking time we got into an argument, and I’d used the mommy board as my source of relief for teething.

  “Don’t start,” I said before she could say anything and of course, that only made her laugh and look at my brother, who was also laughing.

  “I keep telling him Luna’s fine. He’s worried that she isn’t speaking enough,” she said. “Guess why? Because the moms—”

  “What moms?” Freddie asked, joining us. “By the way, Celia’s on her way with Ben.”

  “You’re kidding.” Tessa’s eyes widened. “She has so much explaining to do.”

  Freddie nodded and then looked at me. “What are you talking about?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Oh, you know, Ro and his obsession with mommy boards,” Sam said.

  Tessa held her stomach as she laughed. If it weren’t for the fact that the sound was one of my favorite things in the world and seeing her eyes light up made me feel warm all over, I would have been upset. Since it was and they did, I spent the rest of the afternoon fending off their stupid jokes. When everyone was gone and the kids were both sleeping peacefully in their rooms, I found her standing by the window that overlooked the lake. I walked up, wrapped my arms around her, and took a deep breath. Every morning, I asked myself how I had gotten as lucky as I had, and every morning I was left without an answer. Every night, I thanked the stars for bringing her into my life on more than one occasion.

  “I love you, Sprite.”

  She glanced up at me. “I love you. Always.”

  Afterword

  Thank you SO much for reading!

  Click here for a bonus scene from Rowan and Tessa: Extra scene from MWBTY