Trickster Noir (Pixie for Hire Book 2)

by Cedar Sanderson

  Lom was crabbing backward as fast as he could move, out of reach of the hands, which seemed to be limited to the loosened earth. Bella stood poised on the brink, her MGL in hand, waiting for a clear shot. David, still in bird form, was rolling over and over with the witch, jabbing his beak at her eyes while she had both hands around his neck.

  They were standing in a globe of light, Dorothy standing helplessly beside her, Chong helping Lom to his feet, David utterly silent, writhing away from the witch, now, as she screamed wildly. Bella couldn’t make out words, but the anger was clear. A shifting shadow caught her eye in the darkness outside the light.

  “Lom! ‘Ware wolves!” She shouted, feeling the rawness of her throat with some surprise. Had she been yelling that much? She hadn’t been aware of it.

  She fired the grenade right over the crater and the prone witch. David the firebird had finally gotten one eye, with a crescendo of noise from her, as her face was bloodied and torn. The soft t’chonk of the grenade clearing the muzzle of the weapon was barely audible over that.

  The explosion of the grenade, on the other hand, was satisfyingly loud and bright. The wolf never even had a chance to yelp. She swung the muzzle, tracking for another shadow. Nearby, a wolf dragged useless hind legs as he tried to escape, badly damaged by the grenade blast. Bella could hear the keening of another one, injured in the darkness and invisible. She didn’t see any more movement.

  Dorothy sent an elf-globe of light flying, aiming for the sound. They saw the other beasts that were still capable of movement melt backward into the night, retreating.

  Movement in the crater caught her eye. Lom had gone to one knee and was pressing a hand to the earth, a look of fierce concentration on his face. Outward from him, the ground was smoothing and hardening. The hands caught in his spell froze, their motion arrested in bizarre contortions. She wasn’t sure what he was doing, but it seemed to be working. The witch had one hand on David’s throat, and the other pulled back, with fingers dancing. Bella could see the crackle of building energy on her taloned fingertips.

  David went limp, with a wail, and Bella started forward, her heart in her throat. Surely not...

  There was an explosion. White light, golden feathers, and fire that licked by her body so fast she barely felt the heat before the wave of air hit, and knocked her tip over tail backwards.

  Dizzy and bruised, she lay on her back looking up at the stars, which were moving randomly. Not stars... she had been banged up enough to see the other kind of stars. Dorothy... Lom... Bella tried to sit up, and when that didn’t work, rolled to her side to lever herself up.

  Dorothy was lying on her side, head pillowed on one arm, eyes blinking slowly. Bella checked her. Breathing, no major bleeding, just cuts and bruises.

  “Lie still.” Bella told the girl, uncertain if she was heard.

  Her own ears were ringing, so if Dorothy said something, she couldn’t hear it. Bella staggered onward, to Chong, who was sitting up and holding his head. She patted the top of his head, and when he looked upward, pointed tiredly at Dorothy. The boy probably couldn’t hear any better than she could at the moment.

  He nodded and got slowly to his feet. She left him and went onward to Lom, who was holding his wrist and lying on his back. She’d seen him move, at least. Now, she bent over him, seeing what injuries he had. His head was bleeding, from something, and he was trying to talk to her.

  Bella shook her head and pointed to her ears. She couldn’t quite make out what he was saying. Lom let go of his wrist and grabbed her hand. Then he pointed at the crater, and shouted a single word.

  She figured it out. Leaving him to get to his feet, she turned reluctantly toward the epicenter of the blast. She hadn’t known David for long enough to really form an attachment, but it had been easy to see his affection for her husband, and his childish enthusiasm had been winning, during their afternoon in the garden. Bella took a dragging step toward the heap of blackened debris that was visible, then another.

  The difference between the Firebird and the Raven, she thought as she stumbled on the lip of the now much deeper crater, was responsibility. David had chosen to cloister himself, shut out everyone, even Lom whom he obviously cared for, and retreated from mortality and pain. Raven had embraced life’s cares with enthusiasm, his humor earthy, but his children the center of his world. Even those who bore no real relation to him. Just because they dwelled within his wingspan, he bore the responsibility. Baba Yaga could not have collected power, minions, and whatever else she had, under Raven’s eyes.

  Bella reached the heap of ashes. The returning breezes stirred them a little, the gray and white flakes falling apart. She looked down at it, surprised to feel the hot tears sliding down her cheeks. There wasn’t much here, to be all that remained of two bodies. Fat drops fell from her chin, into the soft ashes, scattering them more.

  After the Fight

  I felt like hell. A murthering great fight, my wrist already splinted from the night before, a blast that had kocked me off my feet... it hurt. My ears were ringing incessantly, and I was having trouble standing up, let alone walking. I was too damn tired to even think about using my wings to keep balance. Bella was standing slumped in the bottom of the crater, her wings drooping.

  “David.” I knew what she had found. I made myself turn to look for the kids, who were leaning on one another, filthy, but on their feet. I took a step toward them, then felt the ground shake under my feet. Huh. I must be hurt more than I feel. I took another step.

  The look on their faces registered on me, then. They were terrified, looking over my shoulder. Chong had his sword, whatever that thing was, up and at ready, but he looked doubtful, like it wasn’t enough. The ground shook again. I turned around, slowly, trying not to fall down.

  When I saw what was coming out of the darkness, I let my hand drop back to my side. The other one was dangling uselessly until Bella could splint it again. I didn’t need a spell. I wasn’t sure where the shotgun had gotten to, in the fray, so a spell would have had to do... but I wasn’t going to fight Beaker.

  “Hey, big boy...” I croaked. He nuzzled me, then snorted at the young people, who must have figured out he wasn’t enemy now, and come closer.

  Leaning on the side of his muzzle seemed like a good idea. He got a little wall-eyed, trying to see me, then held still, as though he’d figure out I needed the support. Chong and Dorothy walked up, still with eyes like saucers.

  “Meet Beaker.” I introduced them. “He’s decided to adopt Bella and me.”

  Dorothy just nodded silently. Poor kid, this had to have been an awful lot for her. Chong looked over at the crater. Bella was climbing carefully out of it, now.

  Her face was dirty, except where twin tear-tracks traced a clean line down her cheeks. Her clothes were torn, and she was clutching her shirt closed across her breasts with one hand, and what had happened to her hair?

  I made my mind stop avoiding the question I needed to ask. “David?” My voice rasped badly, and my throat hurt. Even the single word made me cough.

  She staggered closer, and I reached for her with my good hand, my back leaned against Beaker. Bella fell into my arms, sagging slightly, and caught herself with the hand that had been holding her shirt. Something moved...

  Fascinated, I stared as my wife’s breasts seemed to erupt. From within the torn shirt, a tiny, red, wrinkled bird head emerged. Covered in damp, straggly feathers like a bald man’s bad combover, it looked dreadful. It was one of the most disturbingly good things I had ever seen.

  “Pweep?”

  “David...” I sighed, and hugged Bella close to me.

  “He was still in the egg when I got down there.” Her voice, too, was hoarse. “And I don’t think we killed Baba Yaga. Not enough... ah, remains down there.”

  “Pwoop.” David wasn’t up to speech yet, but the shake of his head was emphatic.

  “Hopefully depleted her. I don’t think I am up to anything more... the wolves?”

 
She shrugged. It did interesting things to her half-uncovered bosom and the tiny rider.

  “Gone, I think. I only fired one grenade.”

  I felt a giggle well up, and tamped it down. Hysteria was no way for a man to react.

  “Honey, you rained a fifteen meter circle of death and destruction on them from afar. No way they’d signed up for that kind of thing.” I looked David in the bright blue eyes. “It is a good thing I know you well enough, with where you are sitting at the moment.”

  I swear the little bastard snuggled down further against those two lovely orbs. He burbled a little. I couldn’t help the laugh, this time, but it was just a laugh.

  Dragon Riders

  Beaker gave us all a ride back to David’s orchard. Riding on his swaying back, clinging to the improvised rope harness made me appreciate the flying carpet as a sane and safe mode of travel. I didn’t want to stay anywhere near the battle field for any longer than we had to, and even though both Bella and I were weaving on our feet with fatigue, I’d pushed Chong and Dorothy into wrapping the ropes around a patient Beaker, who arched his body up and followed their movements with comical, inquiring noises.

  David stayed in his warm perch. I helped Bella scramble up Beaker’s front leg and settle onto his back.

  “Oh, the fin is flexible.” She pushed it down flat and straddled carefully. The barrel of his body was broad enough to make her look like a child up there. She clutched the rope with one hand and her shirt with the other, to keep David from falling out. I got Dorothy up next.

  In retrospect, seating myself last, and just above his ventral legs, was not such a good idea. I was very grateful for an empty stomach, even though I was shaking, by the time we landed, with the need for food after the heavy magic usage. There was no way we were going home by bubble tonight. I didn’t dismount so much as slide off and into a heap, my legs jelly underneath me. Chong exclaimed in dismay at the sight of me on the ground and tried to help me up.

  “No, go help Bella. She only has one hand, too.” Bella had splinted my broken wrist, so it ached badly, but at least I could move the arm now. I propped my back against Beaker, who repeated his circling-the-wagons move, creating a protective circle. It would do.

  Bella staggered over to me and collapsed as well. Dorothy and Chong hovered. David popped his head up. He was fluffy, dried by the heat of Bella’s body. The little gold head swiveled about inquisitively.

  “Peep, peep peep?”

  “At your home.” I told him. Between him, and Beaker, I was going crazy talking to creatures with baby-talk only.

  “Peep!”

  “Yeah, there’s a dragon. He was our ride, and he’s keeping guard, so deal.” I closed my eyes. I was very tired.

  “Pwoop.”

  Dorothy made a muffled noise of surprise, and I opened my eyes. David had summoned the table of plenty.

  “Thanks.” I told him, not wanting to think too hard about why his wordless summons had worked.

  Chong brought me a plate of food, and wine. I ordered him to eat, too, and Dorothy, who’d fed Bella. They sat and let us feed in peace. Until I got the first bite in me, I really didn’t want to eat, with the lingering nausea, and then when I tasted the food, I tore into it voraciously. Chong brought more, at some point, the two young ones taking turns feeding us until I finally fell asleep, possibly in my plate. I’m not real clear on that part of the night.

  It was mid-afternoon when I awakened, judging by the position of the sun in the sky. Beaker was still coiled around, and his eyes were closed. No one was in sight, and there was a gap between his head and tail, so I guessed they were out in the orchard. I drowsed in the warm sun.

  The plop of an apple falling on his back jolted me back awake. Dorothy was sitting nearby, on the ground. The table had gone away.

  “Where is Bella?” I asked.

  “Walking with David. Chong is picking apples. Are you...?” She hesitated.

  “I’m fine.” I got up and stretched. Lots of bruises and some small cuts. The wrist was the worst of it, and that had subsided to a dull ache. “What about you?”

  She looked up at the tree overhead. I gave her time to collect her thoughts. The warm sun and the smell of apples filled my senses. She spoke softly, after some time.

  “The second night, after you had almost rescued us... The witch came in raging. I couldn’t understand her... neither of us could. The table full of food she’d given us, she sent away, and the bathroom. She left us with three buckets, one with water, one empty, and one...” I watched as a full-body shudder rippled through her. “I wouldn’t eat it. It was - I don’t know what was in it.”

  “Probably just as well.” I sighed. “I’m sorry you had to go through this. We may never know just why she took you two.”

  “It was our fault, playing silly games...” she sniffled. “And Ash.” Now she was crying in earnest. I walked over and rested a hand on her head. Her hair was filthy, matted to her skull, and I could feel her trembling.

  “Hey... shhh.” I wondered where Bella had gone. “Ash isn’t dead.”

  She choked back a sob and looked up. “R-really?”

  “Would I lie to you?”

  She shook her head, trying to rub away tears and only succeeding in making her face damply muddy.

  “He did lose his arm, just below the elbow, but Melcar came to take him to his tree, and he will recover.”

  Dorothy sighed and leaned her head against my knee. “Oh... I thought it was my fault...”

  “All will be well. We will get you back home...” I stopped. She had gotten to her feet quickly, and was shaking her head.

  “What?” I asked in surprise.

  “I don’t want to go home. They won’t let me come back to Bella, and I want to help her. I have learned so much, please?”

  Bella walked into my line of sight. “What?”

  I turned to her, seeing the golden-haired lad trailing at her heels. David, growing up at a magical rate. “Dorothy doesn’t want to go home.”

  Dorothy went into Bella’s arms. “Please don’t make me. I’ll never leave the house again, and... and I felt so helpless.” Now she was raging quietly, the tears vanishing into a firestorm of female rage. Bella rubbed her back and smiled over her shoulder at me. “I need to learn to protect myself and others.”

  “I have a very good idea.” Bella promised her. “You will stay my lady-in-waiting, but I will have you stay with someone who will tutor you for a while, does that work? Only, it will be above, not Underhill. It’s very different.”

  Dorothy straightened. “Above?”

  Bella nodded. “With my Uncle Raven. I think you would benefit from learning from him.”

  Dorothy’s eyes got huge and her jaw dropped. “Really?” She squeaked.

  “Yes, you need some time outside Underhill to expand your education.”

  I thought I followed what Bella was thinking. Learning to do without magic, as I had this summer, would be very good for the young fairy. And there was something to be said for teaching the young ones if you wanted to change a culture. Quietly devious, my bride.

  “David.” I held out my hand, and he gravely shook it. “Will you be...”

  “I’m growing fast.” His little-boy voice was piping and strange. “I will be back to my old self in a week. You need not stay, I will appreciate the rest and peace.” He shot Beaker a dirty look.

  “Then we will go as soon as possible.”

  Bella gave him a hug while I called for Chong, who came around Beaker’s tail with his shirt, fashioned into an improvised bag, full of apples. “Are we going?”

  “Yes, I think we can manage the trip back.” I looked at Bella. “You up to it?”

  “If you’ll help. I think it’s going to take a couple of days for me to recover fully.”

  I looked at David. “If you need us, call, please.”

  He nodded solemnly. “I would like a visit, before too long. It was... good to meet you.” He hugged Bella again, and off
ered a dignified handshake to both Chong and Dorothy, whom he had not formally met. Then he walked away, his red-gold curls glowing in the sun. I reached for Bella’s hand, and felt Chong’s hand on my shoulder. Dorothy took Bella’s other hand. We didn’t need contact in the bubble, but I don’t think any of us wanted to be alone just then. Bella wrapped us in the soap-bubble spell and we left the orchard of four seasons behind.

  Mercenary Wench

  The reception back at the Kyuden was tumultuous. I assumed the middle-aged fairy who swooped in and kissed Chong from ear to ear was his mother, as she spent time clucking and cooing over him, before dragging him off into the depths of the building, with him looking vividly embarrassed and relieved at the same time.

  Jao laughed, and dragged us all into the baths. Someone had produced clean clothes by the time I emerged from the small cleansing tub, feeling about ten pounds of dirt and blood lighter. Dorothy and Bella, he informed me, were undergoing a bit of healing, and much pampering and primping from the ladies, who had clucked in dismay at Bella’s ragged haircut. I sank into the big tub across from him, shuddering with pleasure as my bruises and strains started to relax.

  “I still don’t know how that happened.” I told him. “It was a real hairball there for a while.”

  “You should have called for help.”

  I shook my head. “No time. We didn’t know until the last minute where it was going, and attacking it was the last possible moment before it reached her stronghold, and we had to seize the moment.”

  He shrugged. “So, you are successful. And the witch?”

  “I don’t know. I suspect we diminished her greatly. Bella destroyed the hut. But keep an eye to the West, there are stirrings below the surface.”

  His brow puckered, and he nodded solemnly. “I will. Daniken is... humbled. She has been to an audience with the emperor, and I do not think she will move against us now, with the lever you gave me to use against her.”