by Cameo Renae
This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, duplicated, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior written consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
This is a work of fiction. All characters and events portrayed in this novel are fictitious and are products of the author’s imagination and any resemblance to actual events, or locales or persons, living or dead are entirely coincidental.
Cover by Regina Wamba for Mae I Design and Photography
Edited by Victoria Rae Schmitz for Crimson Tide Editorial
Formatting by Inkstain Interior Book Designing
Text Copyright © 2014 Cameo Renae
All rights reserved.
Published by
Crushing Hearts and Black Butterfly Publishing, LLC.
HATE IS A VERY STRONG word. In fact, there are a myriad of reasons why one should avoid the vicious feeling. But at this very moment, I’d never felt more hatred toward another being. I couldn’t stop the bubbling revulsion if I tried. Its dark tendrils spread through me like a cancer, grasping at every cell, seeping from every pore. It filled me with an unexplainable sadness and pain.
In just a single moment, I’d lost everything. My dreams and my future were shattered. He stole my free will and made me a slave. That’s all I was now… a pawn who would eventually be used for destruction.
Lucifer had become the enemy of my soul. He took me to a place I never wanted to go; shrouded in darkness and internal suffering. Outwardly, I bore the marks of his fingers, which he’d wrapped tightly around my neck, nearly squeezing the life from me. The look of pure evil and murderous intent, burning bright in his wicked eyes, was imprinted in memory. It felt like a dream. I could only have wished it was, but the pain was too real.
Just outside my door I was surrounded by everyone I loved, and yet, I’d never felt more alone. They were so close, but I had become disconnected, muted, unwillingly sworn to silence. It was killing me inside, and I couldn’t do anything about it. I had to submit. I had no choice. I wouldn’t risk any of their lives. As much as I wanted to let them know why I was acting indifferent, I wouldn’t speak a word.
Ethon tried to apologize before I left him, but even with the strong magic of the bond, I had a hard time forgiving. It wasn’t something I could brush off and move on from. What happened in that tower was life altering, in the worst sense. I’d almost lost my life to his father. His father!
In essence I had lost it, but no one besides the few who were in that room, would ever know. Ethon knew what his father was plotting, regarding the bond, and yet he easily went along with it. I get he was probably afraid of his father, but still, he didn’t even flinch. He wanted it, just as much as Lucifer did.
But the big question still remained…would I be able to live forever with him and be happy? Whether I liked it or not, Ethon was and would always be, connected to Lucifer.
If it was only Ethon, the answer would be different. The bond had joined us for a reason, and I knew Ethon really wanted to love and protect me. When I was with him, I truly felt it. If given a real chance, I think we could live happily ever after.
Unfortunately, everything changed tonight. I had a glimpse of our future and what it would become. The display between Ethon and his father showed who was in control; and while Lucifer stripped everything from me, my bonded had remained quiet. He did nothing but say we would make it all work. How? How could it possibly work when I would not only be bound to him, but also to his evil father?
Lucian and Lucifer were almost identical. Each had dark, wicked hearts, and wouldn’t hesitate to take control and power, no matter what the cost.
Regrettably, I happened to be the stupid ‘prophesized child’ who would supposedly bring change. Although it seemed absolutely ridiculous, I could already feel the change happening deep within. Every day my power grew in strength. Outwardly, I was the same girl, but just beneath the surface, I felt like a caterpillar slowly transforming, awaiting her chance to break free and spread my wings. I wondered if I would have wings. Ethon had them, and he was a Nephilim, so there was a chance.
And then, there was still a matter of the bond I shared with two different men. I couldn’t help but think what my life would be like if Ethon or Kade weren’t bonded to me. Would they have the same feelings? It was unlikely, considering without the bond, I probably wouldn’t have ever met them.
Kade… the angel who was stripped of his immortality, for me—our bond broken. Nevertheless, a powerful connection remained between us. My heart ached as my thoughts focused on him. How the hell was I supposed to function normally around him? How could I look into his beautiful hazel eyes without sadness or pain? I knew he would want to hold or kiss me, but I couldn’t allow myself to get too close. I had to keep him safe. I wasn’t about to risk his life, when I knew he would easily give it for me.
I wouldn’t allow it. Not over me.
The thought made my insides knot. A stabbing pain shot through my heart, and an even deeper hatred for the one who restrained me. I hated the fact I would never be able to tell Kade why we couldn’t be together. I just had to be strong. I had to hold on, even though my heart was breaking, and the fibers of my life were steadily unraveling.
I pulled the blanket over my head, pushing my face deeper into my pillow, and screamed. There was one thing that might be able to put an end to all of the madness. It was a huge risk, but if it was even possible, it could change everything… or make it worse.
Uncertainty began to coil itself around me, daring to squeeze out whatever hope I had left. I just needed to find a way to make it out of this place without being seen.
I had to find a way to the portal for Midway. I needed to talk to the person in charge; the one responsible for making Kade mortal.
Everything good in my life had been stripped and I was drowning in darkness, but I was going to fight to get it back. There was a war waging inside of me. I could feel it pulsating through my veins. For better or worse, things were going to change. But this was my life, and nothing was going to stop me… even if it meant my death.
I closed my eyes knowing sleep wouldn’t find me for some time, but eventually they became heavy, and darkness overtook me.
Sitting at the edge of a small lake, I dipped my feet in and out of the crystal clear water; appreciating the magical weather. The sun was shining, and the sky was the most unbelievable blue. It almost looked like a painting. The large tree behind me was providing the perfect amount of shade. The grass beneath me was bright green and feathery soft to the touch.
A few yards away, near the water’s edge, two beautiful, children were playing. Their dark hair glimmering in the sun. The little boy was being chased around by an older girl. Their laughter filling the air, making me buzz with delight.
A large, strong hand found mine and squeezed. Leaning back, I breathed in the heady scent of my bonded. My soul mate. He was lying beside me, with one arm behind his head.
“Are the little devils behaving themselves?” he asked.
I turn to face him and use my free hand to draw circles up and down his chest. “Yes. They seem to enjoy this place, almost as much as we do.”
“It’s a shame we haven’t flown here as a family more often.” Turning his head, his mesmerizing eyes lock onto mine in earnest. “We’ll have to remedy that in the future.”
My eyes popped open. I sat up in the darkness, not knowing if what I had just experienced was a dream, or a premonition. Whatever it was, it seemed genuine. I rested my hand to my heart, and took a slow, steadying breath.
It couldn’t be real… could it?
A tear escaped my eye and trailed down my cheek.
Dream or not, my plans were set.
Alone in the darkness, I whispered a prayer. “Can anyone hear me? I need some help, and a little guidance. What do I do next?”
A bright light illuminated from the bottom crack of my closet door. Gasping, I wondered if it was Lucifer. Holding my breath for what seemed like forever, I waited. The longer I sat there, the more compelled I felt to see what was behind the door.
Finally pushing the blanket off, I slowly stood from the bed. My heart hammered against my chest as I took my first few steps. Something, or someone, was there. As I placed my fingers to the knob, it was warm, unlike the room which was ice cold. The light still shone bright from under the door, actually warming my toes.
I slowly turned the knob, and my breath hitched as I pulled it open.
There was no one there, except for an indescribable sweet scent which wrapped itself around me, a dagger lying in the middle of the floor, glowing brightly. I bent down to pick it up and noticed it was resting on a piece of paper folded in half. I picked it up and unfolded it, reading the beautiful handwritten words.
I read the note a few times, and even pinched myself to be sure it was all real.
Things were about to change. There was someone looking out for me, and hopefully it was for my better interest. But what if it was Lucifer trying to set me up? Although, I didn’t have a feeling it was him. Maybe it was my mysterious grandfather, or God himself? He was omnipotent, right?
These thoughts sent a rush of warmth through my veins, and the scent left in the room was of pure angel. There were no hints of smokiness. It was definitely someone from above.
“Thank you,” I whispered, picking up and hugging the dagger and the note to my heart. The dagger was warm, sending a calmness cascading through me. I wasn’t sure if I was doing the right thing. My greatest fear would be putting those I loved at an even greater risk.
But more than anything, I needed answers. I needed to know if I had a chance against Lucifer and Lucian.
All I had was hope. This mission needed to happen, not only for me, but for everyone I loved. I wouldn’t risk everything on a whim, or something I wasn’t sure would make a difference. I had one burning question, and the answer could possibly change everything.
Those around me probably had the answer I was looking for, but I would never ask them because they would have their own opinions. And I didn’t want them to try and persuade me. This question needed to be kept secret. It was to be mine, and mine alone.
The super suit was clean and hung in the corner of my closet. I walked over and touched the fabric. Tingles vibrated through my fingers. Magic. It was the only way to explain it. I wondered if any normal human being would feel the same effects. I peeled off my pajamas and stepped into it, zipping it up. Immediately, its magic pulled me back together, mending my inner cracks and broken heart like a warm hug that never let go. I felt stronger, and suddenly positive I could actually pull this off.
What more did I need? I had this awesome suit of protection, the magical dagger, and the bloodstone amulet to alert me of danger. They were a triple threat, and I almost felt invincible. I was blessed to be in possession of such an amazing gift.
The only thing I was second-guessing at this point was going alone. No one would know where I was, or where I was heading. If anything should ever happen to me, it would be a while before they found out. And what if something happened and I needed help? No one would be there to come to my aid. My stomach began to twist with worry.
I still felt a small reassurance there was someone out there, watching over me. Even if they couldn’t interfere, maybe they could let the others know if I needed help. I didn’t want my mind to dwell on the negative. It would only pull me down from what I knew needed to be done.
I wished the dang portal was closer. Like in-my-room kind of close. That would be amazingly convenient. I could step in and be back before anyone knew I was gone. But of course, that wasn’t the case. It seemed nothing was easy for me.
Taking a car was off limits because anyone of them, Fallen or Guardian, would catch me. This particular quest had to be done on foot. It was miles and miles away and would probably take days to get there. But first, I would have to head down to the kitchen and pack a few necessities for the journey.
Glancing over at the clock on my nightstand, its red numbers illuminated 1:17am. No one should be up at this hour, but in a house full of immortals, anything could happen.
I slipped on my combat boots, and slung an empty backpack over my shoulder.
It was too risky to leave a note. I didn’t want anyone to know of my plan anyway, especially Lucifer.
Taking in a deep breath, I opened my door and glanced both ways down the hall. It was dark and eerily quiet. Slipping out and shutting the door quietly behind me, I made my way down the stairs. I paused and looked at Kade’s door; it was closed and the light was off.
How I wished I had a chance to talk to him. My insides ached to the core, knowing I hadn’t seen or talked to him since the incident with Lucifer. I just hoped he’d understand. One day I would get the chance to explain everything to him.
I pushed the thought from my mind. I needed to focus and get moving before anyone woke up and saw me. Quickly making my way down the stairs, I headed straight for the kitchen. The hallway was dimly lit with nightlights, but the main kitchen lights were off. That was a good sign.
As soon as I stepped inside, I heard voices. They were right outside the door. I quickly ducked behind the counter, knowing I couldn’t leave without being seen.
The door swung open and slammed shut, and then the light clicked on.
Dammit.
“I wonder what kind of goodies Miss Lily left? I hope she has a stash of her awesome cookies,” Dom said. The fridge door opened, and I heard him rummaging about. “So, what? You want anything to eat?”
“Nah. I’m good.”
My heart skipped a beat.
“Dude, just go to her room and give her a goodnight kiss,” Dom jested.
“I can’t. Did you see the time? She’s been through a lot and needs rest.”
“Yeah, but I think she’d rather have a visit from her Prince Charming. You should just seal the damn bond and get it over with, man.”
“You know I can’t do that.”
“Why not? That bastard doesn’t deserve her. They’ll just use her, and you know it. The only way to keep her from them is to seal the bond.”
“Dom, I can’t seal the bond anymore. The bond between us was broken when I became mortal.”
“I think that’s bullshit. Everyone can see it in both of you, even if the bond was supposedly broken. It’s so freaking obvious. How will you know unless you try?” Dom reasoned.
“Because I’m not her only bonded. And, I’m not even sure she knows who she wants to be with at this point. I won’t force her to be with me. When he’s near her, I can see the connection between them. And as much as it hurts to hear, Ethon has a point. He can protect her better than I could, he’s immortal. I’ve already begun to age, and will eventually die. When I’m gone, Emma will remain here, alone.”
“She’ll always have me,” Dom laughed. I could picture Kade rolling his eyes. “Dude, if you love her, you need to freaking fight for her. Mortal or immortal, don’t just sit back and let someone else slip in the side door. You were her first bond. You need to get your shit together and figure out what you want. She might not know what she wants right now, but everyone can see you belong together.
“I mean, seriously. Can you see her spending eternity in hell with Ethon? Emma as Princess of the Underworld, with daddy Devil watching and manipulating her every move? She’ll never be happy, and once they find out about her, they won’t sit back and let her choose. You can be sure they’ll make sure she bonds with the little demon. We can’t stand by and let that happen.”
Damn, Dom totally rocked. He knew exactly what was going on, and I just
hoped they’d be able to figure it all out, in case I failed.
Kade remained silent.
“Kade, you did what you had to. You’re her Guardian, and you gave up your immortality for her. I know she sees that, and she’ll make the right decision. Just don’t bail out and make the choice easy for her. You love her. Just be sure she knows it, alright?”
“Alright,” Kade answered. “Thanks, man. I will make sure she has no doubt, but I’m not going to force her either. I just want her to be happy, and to make her own decision. I guess I’ll have to prove that actions speak louder than words.”
“You already have, bro. Look at you. I think you’ve spoken loud and clear,” Dom said in a more serious voice. “So, are you hungry now? I just found some roast beef, and I am totally making a sandwich.”
I almost laughed out loud, but covered my mouth. He was too much.
“Sure, man. Why not?” Kade agreed.
There was no way I was going to get food or water with them here. I wondered if I should just head back up to my room. But I couldn’t. I had to go. After hearing Kade and Dom’s conversation, I knew I needed to get to Midway as soon as possible. I needed to find some answers.
Starting to feel a little dizzy, I glanced down and realized I was invisible. The suit was aiding in my escape. To be sure, I stayed low to the ground and crawled my way out of the kitchen. As I exited the doorway, I stopped and turned back to look at him one last time.
Kade was standing at the counter, his beautiful face dimly lit by the kitchen light. He tried to smile while talking to Dom, but I could see his mind was elsewhere. His hazel eyes emitted a deep sadness, and I had to turn away.
It was time to leave.
I made my way toward the front door and when I touched the knob, I became terrified. I was leaving the safety and protection of my Guardians, and Samuel and Alaine. I would be out there all alone, with only the suit and dagger to guide me and keep me safe. Am I making the right decision? My mind said no, but my heart said yes. I’d learned to choose my heart. So far, it had never led me astray.