by K E Osborn
“I couldn’t have done it without Ria, she pushed me to be better. I wish she could see this… I miss her, you know?”
Alex winces then looks to the street. “Shit! People are actually coming. Quick go away… like now,” she murmurs gesturing with her hands for us to shoo. I laugh along with Matt as we walk off to another wall looking at one of my paintings as if we were interested in buying it, as a group of people walk in. Alex gets right to work, as I tense up and chew on my bottom lip.
“Stop looking around, you’re being obvious,” Matt says.
“I’m nervous. What if they hate everything? What if they’re critics and they review everything really badly?”
“Dude, you’ve been open five minutes. You need to calm down, do I need to get Whisper in here to calm down your ass?”
“No, I don’t need him in here rearranging. Let’s go out the back, I can’t handle watching.”
Matt chuckles. “Pussy.”
We walk out to the studio and Matt looks around taking in all my half-finished pieces of work. “Wow! Dude, this is really amazing.”
“Nah, it’s just something I needed when we were not touring or rehearsing.”
We sit for what seems like hours discussing life in general. How I miss Ria. I show him the dove and how it’s unfinished, and he tells me I should finish it and send it to her as a ‘thank you’ for Alex. I stew on that thought for a while and figure it’s probably a good idea, I might actually do that.
Eventually, Alex comes in and smiles so beamingly that I take a second to admire her features.
“Okay, you want the good news or the bad news?”
I sit up a little taller. “Um… in that order I suppose.”
“Okay, good news is we sold your first painting.”
I look to Matt, my eyes wide open and let out an excited “whoop whoop,” as he high fives me!
“Yes, good going, bro. I knew you could do it.”
Alex keeps smiling, but I remember there was bad news and I furrow my brows. “Wait, what’s the bad news?”
She grins wider bending down slightly for emphasis and opens her eyes wide like she is about to tell a huge secret. “We sold all the paintings in the gallery, Nate.” She lets out a small squeal at the end as she jumps in the air like a lunatic.
My head swirls as I almost fall off my seat reaching out to the wall to steady myself.
“Um… what? Sorry, what?”
“The collection sold out,” Alex says.
“That’s good, right?” Matt asks.
Alex laughs. “It’s great. Amazing even. But he now he needs to paint a whole new collection.”
Shaking my head, I exhale and run my hand through my hair. “Who bought them all?”
“A heap of people, they’ve been streaming in.”
“Fuck! What if I can’t keep up? I only have a couple of dozen finished paintings back here.”
“Well, the band doesn’t have anything happening at the moment. So be here, paint, put your love of art and the misery of missing Ria on to the canvas and get your business up and running. Alex is obviously too good at her job, so you need to get ahead before we need to take off again.” He gives me a wide smile. “Be here… paint, Nate. I’ll keep tabs on the Recoil side of things while you get lost in acrylic or whatever it is you paint with.”
“Thanks, Matt, this means a lot.”
“I know it does, that’s why I’m supporting you. I will always support you, Nate.”
Chapter Eighteen
TWO WEEKS LATER
I’m in the studio painting, pouring my heart into another canvas. The brush strokes along the textured fabric with ease, acrylic smothering the board with the pain I’m feeling. Nothing but raw emotion seeping from my fingers into the canvas as I work my feelings into the artwork. This one’s a moody piece, of a woman who looks eerily similar to Ria. I hadn’t intended this piece to be about her, but somehow lately, all my work seems to have something connecting to her.
I miss her… I fucking miss her, but not a lot can be done about that. She’s made her choice. I have to live by that. I dab the brush giving the artwork a stipple effect and exhale as the piece is coming together. This place, this gallery… Ria was right, it’s perfect for me, and having Alex here is the exact push I need to get me moving in the right direction.
Music is my life, but art is my passion and in my downtime, I want to be spending as much time here as I can.
Moving my brush into the jar of water, I swirl it around removing the black paint. Alex strolls in looking at the painting in front of me. She half-smiles and exhales tilting her stature with her hand on her hip. Her eyes move to me and I raise my eyebrow at her judgmental face.
“What?” I ask and she lets out a bemused laugh.
“You want to call her,” she simply states then looks to the painting. Obviously, she can see the Ria resemblance too.
Exhaling, I drop the brush into the jar of water, stand up and throw a cloth over my shoulder while stepping over to the sink to wash my hands. “No, she said she didn’t want me and made that fact perfectly clear.”
Alex is quiet as I turn on the taps and rinse my hands under the warm soapy water. I turn in time to watch her walk out of the studio and furrow my brows thinking it’s not like her to give up so easily. Shaking my head, I turn off the tap and shake my hands a couple of times to rid the excess water then grab the paper towel to dry. Swinging back around just as Alex walks back in, I notice a bottle and a couple of shot glasses in her hand. I grin a little when I see it is, in fact, a bottle of tequila and I let out a small laugh.
“Alex, you have a bottle of tequila in your hand.”
She looks down and opens her eyes wide and fakes shock. “Holy shit, I do too. How the fuck did that get there? Wow! The tequila fairy must be invading my privacy again. I’ll get you, you damn fairy. Fucker always tries to get me drunk… Oh well, guess I’ll have to share with you now, right?” she asks pulling up a stool and plonking down on it.
I laugh shaking my head and sit down next to her. “You’re seriously weird, you know that?”
“I know, it’s why I’m so crazy irresistible to all men and the fairy kind.”
I snort as she pours us each a shot. “We’re at work you know?”
She shrugs and tilts her head to the side looking at the clock on the wall. “The gallery closed over an hour ago, so officially we’re off the clock, boss man. To me that means it’s happy hour. So shut up and bottoms up, big boy,” she says clinking her glass to mine then slamming the tequila down her throat. Her nose wrinkles up after she swallows in a cute little way which makes me chuckle, but I follow suit and throw back my shot of tequila which burns all the way down, but I like the hurt. It reminds me that even though I’m numb I can still feel something.
“Why are you so nice to me?” I ask.
Alex pours me another shot of tequila and I raise it to my mouth, pouring the contents down the hatch.
Alex laughs and raises her eyebrows insinuatingly. “Because your brother is so freaking hot.”
I can’t help it as I spit out the tequila in a shocked laugh. It sprays all over the bench and an unused canvas as Alex smirks swallowing another shot.
“What the fuck?” I ask and she laughs shaking her head.
“No, just kidding. You’re face though… priceless! I’m nice because you’re a great boss, an incredible talent and a wonderful man. I’m nice because you are.”
“Okay, so I get why you’re single, you hate men because of your ex, right?” She nods. “But honestly Alex, you’re a stunner. A little kooky, but you’re amazing. Any guy would be lucky to have you.”
She takes another shot of tequila and then hands me one. I take it and swig it back. “So, Matt’s the older twin, right?” I nod. “And he’s a commitment-phobe, yeah?”
“I think he was, but he’s been more open to the idea of settling down lately for some reason. But he has this idea about his perfect girl. He has this sh
opping list of requirements. It’s so stupid. He’ll never find a girl who matches them all.” Nodding, she exhales. “He’s picky. He’s a douche. He’s so used to the slutty scene of the rocker lifestyle. So much so, he wants the exact opposite of that. I think what he’s looking for only exists in a nunnery.”
“Ha! The rocker and the nun… it could work, stranger things and all that jazz,” Alex quips with a smirk.
I chuckle. “He’s too much of a perfectionist. Everything has to be his way exactly. I honestly don’t think any girl would put up with him, other than a doormat.”
Alex snorts. “Ha… Matt and his doormat.”
I chuckle and nod. “Exactly. In my opinion any girl would be nuts to go out with him, he’s the crazy brother.”
Alex laughs. “Right ‘cause you’re so fucking sane with your moody art and your crying into your canvases every day through your paintbrushes, Mister I’m-so-normal man.”
Shaking my head, I shrug. “Touché.”
“See Nate, there’s no such thing as normal. I’m not normal. You’re certainly not normal. Matt’s not. Ria’s not. None of us are normal, per se. Not even Robert over there,” she says pointing to Robert the cleaner who has a nineties style mullet and wears overalls two sizes too big.
She’s right. There’s no such thing as normal, and in this day and age, I guess that’s a good thing.
“So what are we doing tonight?” Alex asks.
“We?” I reiterate.
“Yes, we. You’re always couped up in here at night painting, and I go home and come back the next morning to see you here already. Like… do you even leave or do you live here… sleeping on the floor using your canvases as blankets and your brushes for pillows like a goddamned freak? Are you a freak, Nate? Are you?”
I chuckle at her witty prompting and I shake my head. “I’m not a freak, Alex.”
“Good, then we’re leaving now and going out.”
“We are?”
“Yes. C’mon. I have just the place to cheer you the fuck up.”
“Man, you have such a way with words.”
She grins pouring us another round of shots and raises the glass for me to clink together. “Cheers big ears, drink that fucker, then let’s go.” She slams the shot down her throat, then grabs my hand with one of hers, the bottle of tequila with the other and yanks me out of the studio. I chuckle trying to keep up with her fast pace, but she’s rushing quickly, and it’s making my usual somber mood almost cheery. I manage a small chuckle.
“Alex, slow the fuck down. I haven’t eaten all day and this liquor is making me wobbly.”
She scoffs shaking her head as we race toward the front of the gallery. “Pish posh, Nate. Tonight we’re having fun, and you, you’re going to unwind. If that means getting trashed, you’re gonna. So shut up and drink, boss,” she says shoving the bottle into my chest.
I smirk raising an eyebrow at her and shrug.
It can’t hurt.
What’s the worst that could happen?
It’s not like I need to function tomorrow anyway. Hell, I’m the boss I can take the day off if I want to. She’s right. I’ve been moping around like a fucking lost puppy for days now. I need to let my hair down and try to forget about Ria. So I take a swig of the potent liquid as Robert chuckles while mopping the floor.
“Robert, you good to lock up?” Alex calls out.
“Yeah, you kids have fun,” he calls back.
I nod at him as we walk out the front of the gallery and onto the street. The night air feels damp, and only the street lights illuminate the gray night sky. The overcast ominous clouds fill the dreary atmosphere with purple and black tones. It’s not late, but it looks it, as the moon is hidden beneath the over-clouded heavens.
“Where are we going? To a pub or something?” I ask and Alex scoffs then shakes her head.
“God no, pubs are for pussies. We’re going somewhere far more hardcore.”
Tensing up, I clench my jaw wondering what kind of shit Alex is into. I don’t know her all that well, after all we’ve been working together for only a short time. Sure, I spend a lot of time with her but honestly, I know nothing about her. She could be an underground raver. She could be into BDSM. She could be one of those people who thinks they’re a freaking vampire. Fuck knows what I’m about to get myself into.
“Alex.”
“Oh for God’s sake, Nate, I didn’t picture you as a wimp.”
I puff my chest out slightly. “I’m not.”
“Then shut the hell up and trust me,” she says dragging me toward my security details car. I take a deep breath and bob my head up and down matter-of-factly like I’m agreeing with her even though I’m still not one hundred percent convinced I’m not heading to a dominatrix dungeon.
We slide into the car and she leans forward whispering to the driver. I crease my face up in annoyance that I didn’t hear our destination, but I guess I have to just trust her on this one.
She turns looking at me as the driver pulls out onto the road and she smiles. “You’re gonna love it, Nate,” she says grabbing the bottom of the bottle and hoisting it up to my mouth. I shake my head once with a sly smile and take another long gulp of the tequila. It burns reminding me that I can in fact feel and that I can still live even though I lost something so precious.
My chest squeezes while thinking of Ria and I wince slightly. Alex notices and places her hand on my knee giving it a little squeeze then takes the bottle from me and takes a sip.
She looks to me and sighs. “Look, I know things with you and Ria are… strained right now—”
“I think strained is not the word I’d be looking for, Alex… over is more like it.”
She frowns. “Well, in any case I want you to try and have fun. I know break ups are hard… trust me, I know. But Ria would want you to still be living. Not wallowing your life away in the studio pining for her.”
“Has she moved on?” I ask.
Alex furrows her brows shaking her head slightly. “No, that’s not what I meant. I mean she just wants you to be happy, Nate. So be happy. Live, paint, percussion-ate?” She scrunches up her face. “Is that even a word? I don’t think that’s a word—”
“Yeah, nah… that’s not a word.” I laugh.
“It should be, it’s a freaking cool word.”
I laugh with a bright smile and she smiles back at me and nods. “There it is, that smile I’ve been missing. I know this is hard. You and her had a really great thing going on. And things now are complicated and messy, but if you’re meant to find your way back together, you will… I have faith in that. It’s written in the wind and all that.”
Furrowing my brows at her words that sound eerily like something Whisper would say, I slump down into the seat of the car with a sigh as I take another long sip of the tequila. The effects of the alcohol swirling through my system making my body tingle and my head fuzzy. The buzz has kicked in, and I have no idea if Alex is feeling tipsy too, but I know if I drink too much more I probably won’t be able to walk to wherever we’re going in a straight line.
The car suddenly pulls to a stop and I furrow my brows. We’ve only been driving for probably a maximum of five minutes, maybe not even that. Alex jumps up and down in her seat and claps her hands together excitedly as she looks out the window to the right. I follow her gaze and look to the building.
I let out a small bemused laugh. “You gotta be kidding me?” I murmur and she turns to face me, her eyes sparkling bright almost twinkling with utter jubilation as her smile reaches her eyes and she bobs up and down on the seat like a fricking kid.
“Nope, not kidding. I’m very, very serious. I take Inflatable Land with one hundred percent sincerity, Nate. So lock and load my friend. Shit’s about to get crazy!”
I burst out laughing at the completely serious look on her face. Pursing my lips as she takes another swig from the tequila bottle, I shake my head with another slight chuckle. “Isn’t this place for kids?”
She furrows her brows at me and curls up her lip. “Are you calling me… me a child, Nate?”
I’m not sure if she’s playing around or being completely serious right now so I decide to err on the side of caution. “Umm, no? Just that I thought only children could play in there?”
“Ha! Shows what you know, peasant. Now get out of the car and get ready for total annihilation!” she says the last part slowly, and in a low voice like it’s from a video game or something. This side of Alex is slightly scary, but really quite funny at the same time. She seems really competitive but I think this is going to be a whole heap of fun. Which is just what I need. She opens the car door and goes to get out.
“Wow! Looks like you’re in for an entertaining night, dude,” my security detail says.
“You’re telling me,” I say as I smile at him.
He nods to me as Alex rushes forward. “I’ll keep back out of the way. You won’t even know I’m here.”
“Thanks, buddy,” I say and slide out of the car with my bottle of tequila. Alex is jumping from foot to foot like a six-year-old. It’s kind of cute how excited she is.
It makes me almost forget why we’re here.
To make me forget…
Taking another drink of the yellow liquid, it burns in its customary way as I step up to Alex and shake my head at the flashing signs and the giant inflatable clown out the front of the building.
“This is a bad idea. You know that, right?”
She smirks grabbing the bottle from me. “Why? Scared I’m gonna beat you at everything?”
“What is there to beat me at? There’s just blow up slides and shit in there.”
She grins mischievously and shakes her head. “Oh Nate, so innocent for a hardcore rocker. Come, enter my domain.”
Raising my eyebrow at her, I smirk. “Weird… that’s the only word I have for you.”
“It’s a badge and I wear with pride.”
While walking with her to the door I chuckle. She opens it and we step through to the sounds of children laughing and screaming and I shake my head wondering how we’re even going to be let in here. She walks us up to the counter and a large guy with tufts of red hair either side of his face that reminds me of a rather obese version of Side Show Bob, smiles a little too wide when he sees Alex.