by Jamie Denton
Another smiley face appeared on the monitor, this one with a halo above its head. Emily and Amanda both started giggling. “I think I’m really going to like her,” Amanda said from over his shoulder.
Emily leaned against the edge of Amanda’s mahogany desk, her hand resting protectively over the slight bulge of her tummy. “You’re not trying hard enough, Ben,” she said. “Where’s all that legendary Perry charm?”
He leaned back in the leather chair, prepared to admit defeat. “Drew got it all.” When it came to women, he wished he had a fraction of his brother’s charisma. “Tell me again why I let you two talk me into this?”
Emily looked at him as if he were dense. “Because you’re in love with her.”
“It’ll work,” Amanda encouraged him. “Just use your imagination.”
“My imagination is going broke,” he complained. He’d tried flowers, jewelry and chocolates at his sisters-in-law’s insistence, but nothing had worked. Clearly they had grossly underestimated the extent of Jana’s tenacity.
“You didn’t send her lingerie, did you?”
“No,” he told Emily.
“Good, because if she thinks you want sex, forget it.”
“So I’ve heard,” he muttered.
Amanda settled her hands on his shoulders and gave him a gentle shake. “Think, Ben. Think. What’s the one thing you know she can’t resist?”
“You know, I could take out a full-page ad in the Times for you,” Emily offered. “I’ll do the copy free of charge.”
“There’s a limit to my humiliation, Emily.”
Amanda gave his shoulder a firm pat. “Not after what you did, there isn’t.”
Drew poked his head into Amanda’s office. “Cale wants to know how many steaks to pick up at the store.”
“Six,” Ben told his brother, then turned back to the computer with renewed energy. If Jana wouldn’t come to him willingly, he wasn’t above dragging her—kicking and screaming if necessary. He’d show her tenacity. One way or another, they were going to resolve this mess—today.
I want to see you, he wrote. He should’ve just gone to her place as he’d wanted to and groveled as Drew had suggested. Instead, he’d listened to his sisters-in-law and was now embroiled in an electronic sparring match.
Blue is not your color, flashed on the monitor in response.
He shook his head, confused. “She lost me,” he admitted.
“She’s saying not to hold your breath,” Emily explained, her voice tinged with laughter.
They could go on like this all day. “What did you say earlier?” he asked Amanda. “What can’t Jana…what was it?”
“Resist.” Amanda twisted her long auburn hair into a knot, then snatched a pencil from the holder on the desk and weaved it through her hair to hold it in place. “What’s the one thing you know she absolutely cannot say no to?”
At one time, he’d arrogantly believed she couldn’t resist him, but after the past week, she’d staunchly proven otherwise. He smiled suddenly, and typed, Chicken?
Never! Jana sent back.
He chuckled. “Wanna bet, babe?” he said as he typed his reply, hit Send and waited.
I DARE YOU!
Jana gasped when the words flashed on the screen, taunting her. Daring her.
Don’t go there! She hit the send button so hard she broke her fingernail.
“Okay, that’s it. Drama over,” Lauren stood and slung her big canvas bag over her shoulder. “Let’s go, Chloe. She’s officially history.”
“You can’t leave me,” she pleaded.
I double dare you.
Jana panicked. “Don’t go.” If her friends deserted her, she’d do something stupid, like take him up on that stupid dare. “He’s not playing fair.”
Chloe bent down and gave her a supportive hug. “You’re in love with him. He obviously feels the same way. What if this is the real deal, Jana? Are you willing to risk it?”
The computer bleeped. She was afraid to look.
You know what’s next…
Jana bit her lip and stared at the monitor. The cursor blinked, mocking her. Challenging her to pick up the gauntlet he’d thrown down unfairly.
“I’m afraid,” she said quietly. “He’s already hurt me once. What if he does it again? I don’t know if I can handle it.”
Lauren offered her a sympathetic smile. “The only thing that keeps us from what we want, Jana, is fear. If we conquer the fear, isn’t the reward that much sweeter?”
She had a hard time arguing with Lauren’s logic. Especially since she’d already had a taste of how sweet those rewards were. “If I don’t risk anything, then there’s nothing to gain. Right?”
“No pain, no gain,” Chloe added.
“I’ve already felt the burn once,” she reminded them. “Trust me, it isn’t any fun.”
“We’re leaving.” Lauren nudged Chloe toward the door. “Call if you need us.”
Jana nodded and turned her attention back to the laptop.
“Twenty bucks says she’s having make-up sex within the hour,” she heard Chloe say before the door closed.
Jana drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. And hesitated. “Risk it,” she said. Two words that had completely changed her life a little over two weeks ago. She’d taken a chance once, and the results had been more than she’d ever dreamed possible.
You do not play fair. She clicked the send button again and prayed she wasn’t making a mistake. One from which she might never recover.
THE FORTY-FIVE MINUTES he’d waited for Jana to arrive at Cale’s had been the longest of his life. Now that she was here, he wasn’t sure where to begin. She certainly wasn’t going to make it easy on him, that much he did know.
She leaned against the front fender of her sporty coupe with her arms folded in front of her. A pair of dark sunglasses shielded her eyes from the sun, and prevented him from accurately gauging her mood.
In accordance with the unseasonably warm weather, she wore a little denim skirt that showed off the perfection of her long, shapely legs, and a bright-red top just short enough to allow him an enticing glimpse of her bare midriff when she moved. If she was wearing that drop-dead cherry-red lace combination beneath, he’d be a goner.
The warm breeze blew a lock of her hair into her face and she impatiently pushed it behind her ear. “This better be good,” she sassed him. “I gave up a root canal to come here.”
His lips twitched. “Dentists don’t work on Sunday,” he reminded her.
She slid her sunglasses down the slope of her nose, far enough to glare at him over the rim. “I was making a point.”
So he’d figured. “I’m glad you decided to come.”
One arched eyebrow winged up before she used the tip of her middle finger to push the sunglasses back in place.
He tried not to wince, but her message was pretty clear. “If I told you how sorry I am, will you forgive me?”
She flashed him one of those sugary smiles guaranteed to irritate him. But not today. If it killed him, he would not let his patience slip.
“Why?” she asked, taking off her sunglasses.
With her so close, the need to touch her tripled. He wanted to feel her curves pressed against him so badly he ached. If he wasn’t afraid she’d literally do him bodily harm, he’d pull her into his arms and kiss her senseless until she forgot how angry she was with him for being a jackass.
The woman was definitely doing a number on his patience. But he hadn’t survived hell because he lacked a determination that could put her stubbornness to shame.
He closed the space between them and leaned into her. Her eyes widened in surprise as he braced his hands on either side of her hips, trapping her between him and her car. “I love you, Jana,” he said, once they were at eye level. “That has to count for something.”
“You have such a way with words.” The wariness and hurt in her gaze defused her sarcastic taunt. “Too bad the ones you don’t say get you into troubl
e.”
“I have never thought of you as a convenience.”
She closed her eyes and turned her head to the side, but not before he caught the glimpse of hope she tried to hide from him. He waited, and felt her resolve slowly weaken. The tense set of her shoulders eased.
For all of five seconds.
She made a sound of disgust and pushed past him. The distance she put between them was so much more than physical. He was going to lose her.
“That wasn’t the impression you gave me.” She tossed her sunglasses on the dashboard of her car before she faced him again, hurt and anger etched on her face. “It was fun while it lasted,” she said and reached for the car door. “We need to accept that we’re just not right for each other and move on.”
Before she could open the door, he settled his hand over hers. She was wrong. If she truly wanted to move on, then her voice wouldn’t have sounded so brittle, and her eyes wouldn’t be filling with moisture.
“What do you want from me?” he asked her. “Tell me what I have to do because I’m running out of ideas here.”
His chest tightened with dread when she slowly shook her head from side to side. Dammit, he knew she loved him, so why was she so eager to walk away? He’d screwed up, he knew that, but she wasn’t even open to the possibility of giving him a second chance.
“I want what you can’t give me,” she whispered.
He smoothed the back of his hand down her cheek. “You have my heart, Jana. Can’t that be enough?”
She bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut. He couldn’t breathe.
“What if it isn’t?” she asked as she opened her eyes. “I’m not the kind of person that you can keep on a shelf and only bring down when it’s good for you. Since I was a little girl I’ve known how it feels to be only second best. It hurts. Please, Ben. Don’t ask me to go through it again. I just can’t do it.”
Understanding slammed into him with the subtlety of a wrecking ball as he realized exactly how deeply he’d hurt her. Because he’d let her believe she hadn’t mattered enough to him, he’d inadvertently awakened a dragon of her own that she hadn’t slain. God, why hadn’t he seen it sooner? Her die-hard perfectionism. Her reaction every time he walked out the door because he’d believed he was needed elsewhere. He’d walked all over her insecurities caused by a self-absorbed parent, and he hadn’t even known.
Too many years of taking charge made him instinctively want to beat the beast back into its cave to protect her, but he knew he couldn’t do it. Not this time. She had to conquer that demon herself so old wounds could eventually heal. She wouldn’t have to face it alone, though, because if she’d let him, he’d be there, offering his support and encouragement, along with his love.
He cupped her cheeks in his hands and urged her to look at him. “You will never be an afterthought to me, Jana. I promise you.”
“I know I sound selfish—”
“No. Don’t think that way. Selfish would be an ultimatum. You haven’t demanded I give up my job or my family for you, have you?”
“I wouldn’t ever ask you to give up something that’s important to you.”
He dipped his head and brushed his mouth across hers. “Then stop asking me to give up on you.”
Her bottom lip trembled. He waited, but the tears never came. “I love you,” she whispered softly. “So much it scares me.”
“I know, babe,” he said, pulling her into his embrace. “It scares me, too. But we’ll figure it out. Okay?”
She nodded and gave him a tremulous smile as she wreathed her arms around his neck, bringing her body in perfect alignment with his. She clung to him as if she never wanted to let him go, and that was just fine by him.
He didn’t care that they were standing in the middle of his brother’s driveway, and gave in to the need to taste her. Desire rolled through his body with the force of a backdraft, hot and impossible to tame, until the blare of a horn brought an abrupt end to their kiss.
“I have to know something.” He ushered Jana toward the rear of the house as Cale and Drew pulled into the driveway. “What are you wearing under that skirt?”
She walked ahead of him on the narrow concrete path, giving him a great view of her behind hugged in tight denim. “Wanna see?”
He snagged her hand and pulled her to him. The air hissed out between his teeth when she wiggled her bottom against him. He dipped his head and caught her earlobe between his teeth. “Tell me,” he demanded, “and I’ll know if you lie.”
“Red,” she whispered. “Lace. Like the color of ripe cherries.”
He groaned in pure agony. “You don’t play fair,” he told her as she slipped away from him.
She turned to face him, a definite sassy glint in her eyes and a sinful smile curving her lush mouth. “I never intended to.”
ISBN: 978-1-4603-7199-2
UNDER FIRE
Copyright © 2003 by Jamie Ann Denton.
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