by Lisa Hill
‘And you’re certain this is what you want?’
‘Yes,’ Louise said, nodding her head.
‘Then, I might be able to help you out.’
***
‘Okay, I give in,’ Jack fumbled in his pocket to make sure the little box was still nestling there. ‘You’ve proven how much you love me so, please, could you get down now?’
‘Is this going to take much longer?’ Edward said, approaching the scattered gathering. ‘Only it’s threatening to rain, and I’d like to at least map out the site before it starts.’
Something in Jack was ready to explode. He stamped the ground with his foot. ‘Reckon you’d be better off waiting for the rain; this ground’ll be harder than granite to cut into, it’s baked from twelve weeks of continuous sunshine.’
‘Which would be very convenient, wouldn’t it, Jack?’ Edward spat.
‘Oh, I’m not here to protest,’ Jack said calmly, remembering from the last time he and Edward had had an altercation in Rebecca’s apartment, that the calmer he was the more irritated Edward became.
‘Then why are you here?’
‘To retrieve my future wife.’
‘What? Ohhh!’ Pamela gasped.
He looked at Edward as he descended to one knee and retrieved the little box from his pocket.
Edward was turning the colour of a blushed tomato. ‘What are you doing?’
‘Yes, what are you doing?’ Pamela asked, disentangling herself from the seatbelt in the cab.
‘What I should have done months ago, Pam,’ he said, opening up the box. It was true, all that worrying about proposing, prevaricating over buying a ring had been so silly. He still wasn’t sure if his reluctance was because Pam was still married or because part of him, a very small part of him, still felt he was married to Mary, but either way, he had been so foolish. If only he’d got on and bought the ring, then perhaps when Edward had returned Pam would have thought twice about inviting Edward to stay without consulting him first; the past few weeks of stress needn’t have happened.
He loved her.
‘Pam, I’m sorry,’ he said, watching Pamela disentangle herself from the cab, teeter down the steps and rush as far as her stiletto heeled sandals would allow her across the dried grass.
She came to a halt in front of him and gasped. ‘Oh Jack, it’s beautiful.’
Edward peered down at the jewellery box and sneered. ‘Not as big as the one I bought you.’
Pamela stood up straight and turned on her soon-to-be-ex-husband. ‘Do you mind, Edward? This is a private moment between Jack and I; you’ve ruined so many other moments in my life, I’m not having you mess this one up too.’ She returned her gaze to Jack, beaming.
‘So, what do you say?’ Jack said, looking up at this beautiful woman he had almost lost. ‘Me arthritis is giving me knee a lot of gip, it’d be good if you gave me your answer, so I can stand up. Will you, Pam? Will you marry me?’
‘Yes, Jack! Yes, I will!’ she said, whipping the ring out of its slit in the cushioning and grappling to get it on her wedding ring finger. ‘Oh, it fits perfectly!’ she said, holding her hand up and waggling her fingers excitedly. ‘When did you get it?’
There was a whoop and clapping from Tom, as Jack creaked his old knees to stand back up straight again. ‘Yesterday afternoon, after we did the flowers together. I rushed into Harrogate before the jewellers on James Street closed. Audrey sneaked me one of your costume rings, so I’d get the right size.’
‘Oh Jack,’ Pamela clasped her chest before reaching in to kiss him.
He kissed her fervently back, wrapping his arms around her, feeling like he was back where he belonged. As he broke away, he caught sight of a very angry looking Louise, storming across the field, like Boudica about to launch into battle with her golden ringlets flowing behind her.
‘Come on,’ Jack said, keeping his arm around Pamela. ‘There’s a storm gathering across the field and it looks like a Louise-shaped blur to me. Best we get back to the wedding before many more guests abandon it, like rats off a sinking ship.
‘Okay,’ Pamela said, an air of excitement in her voice. ‘And, Jack—’
‘Yes?’
‘I am sorry, too.’
Jack leaned down and kissed her firmly on the lips. ‘Least said, soonest mended.’ Wanting to draw a line under the whole awful ordeal. He could only hope Edward crawled back under the rock he came from and left them all to get on with their lives, including planning for their own wedding.
***
‘I cannot believe you!’ Louise bellowed, storming past Jack and Pamela, coming to a halt at Johnnie’s feet. ‘How old do you think you are, fifteen?! You’re not Adrian Mole, you know!’
‘Lou,’ Johnnie said, sounding chilled out and totally patronising. ‘You’ve got to look at the bigger picture. If Edward has his way—’
‘Oooh!’ she shrieked, feeling like she could get up inside the cab of that loader and give him the fright of his life by driving him around in its bucket. ‘You never listen!’
‘Well, I hate to say it, Lou, but I could say the same about you.’ He looked incredibly relaxed, lying in the bucket of the loader with a padlocked chain around his waist. ‘You’re just not getting the message of how serious this whole business is. More shops in the village will cataclysmically affect our trade.’
She rolled her eyes, folded her arms and silently counted to ten. She wanted to argue the toss, that perhaps more trade would bring more custom into the village, but what was the point? Johnnie wouldn’t listen. And he’d been so busy not listening that there were more pressing matters to discuss.
She sighed. ‘Johnnie,’ she said, feeling drained of energy from this perpetual argument which took them around and around in circles. ‘You’re so busy looking at the big picture, you’ve forgotten to concentrate on the here and now.’
‘But our future will be bleak if we don’t put a stop to this development!’
‘THERE IS NO FUTURE FOR US!’ she screamed.
The lively discussion of the workmen, huddled around Edward, fell silent. Tom disconnected the call he was on. Johnnie scrambled up to a sitting position, which was hard for him when the chain appeared to be anchoring him to the bucket, his unloosened tie skewwhiff.
Tom cleared his throat. ‘Look, Johnnie, if this is going to cause an argument, I can stay here on my own. A reporter from the local radio station is on their way down and—’
‘Sorry, Tom, but this is beyond a one-off argument.’ Louise said, before returning her attention to Johnnie. ‘You have left me and the girls today to serve an entire wedding reception between the three of us.’
‘Lou, I told you—’
‘See!’ she interrupted. ‘There you go again, making excuses! It doesn’t matter whether this development goes ahead or not; if you and I could face it together, we could have got through whatever comes our way, but,’ she hesitated, as she heard her voice wobble, ‘I don’t want that anymore, Johnnie. I don’t want to keep getting up before the dawn to bake bread, spend twelve hours on my feet, then clear up and cook some more, to make our supper. I’m fed up with it.’ She looked down at her feet, scared of the reaction to what she said next.
At least he was restrained by being chained to the loader’s bucket.
‘I don’t love you anymore, Johnnie,’ she mumbled.
‘What?’ His voice sounded muffled and strained.
She looked up and fixed him square in the eyes. ‘I’m leaving you.’
He began to twitch. His face crumpled into something resembling disbelief. ‘What? You can’t leave me, what about the stores?’
‘Pah!’ Louise laughed to prevent herself from crying. And here she was thinking she was the one who was going to hurt Johnnie by telling him her decision. ‘Didn’t you hear what I just said? I say I don’t love you anymore and you’re more concerned over what’s going to happen to the stores?’
‘No!’ he cried. ‘Of course not!’ he shouted. ‘It’s ju
st, it’s our business, our livelihood, it’s what we do together.’
The sky grew darker and the first drops of rain started to spot on Louise’s face, mingling with the tears beginning to escape from her eyes. ‘No, Johnnie,’ she said, pulling her blouse sleeves down over her hands as she trembled. ‘It’s always been your vision, not mine. I can’t keep on this hamster wheel of monotony and routine with you never there.’
‘Oh, I see,’ he said, rolling his eyes. ‘Bored now, are we? Bored of playing shops so want to go and do something different? I thought that’s what your cake business was all about. The girls have been very supportive to help you get that off the ground but it’s not enough for you, is it? Or is that Megan’s escaping off to university and you feel a pang of jealousy?’
Louise let tears slide down her face as she watched the man she’d been married to for twenty years morph into someone she barely recognised. She wasn’t sure if she was trembling from the chilly air that seemed to be setting in with the rain or from incandescent rage of the nasty words Johnnie was saying to her.
‘Is it too hard for you to admit your part in all of this? That in your pursuit to stop this development going ahead you’ve neglected your duties as a husband, a father and a business owner?’
His mouth dropped. ‘All I do is put you lot first! I used the money from Tom’s wedding to pay for a holiday, I sorted out cover for the stores, I’ve been dedicated to stopping this development to go ahead to protect our livelihoods! And this is the thanks you give me? You tell me that you’ve had enough! It should be me leaving you!’
The rain started coming down hard and thunder rumbled in the distance. Louise closed her eyes to focus her mind. She couldn’t argue anymore. Not with a man who was always right.
‘Fine,’ she said, opening her eyes. ‘I’m sorry, I got it wrong. It’s all my fault.’ And with that, she turned and trudged back across the field, feeling like a great big weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Megan and Louise were serving coffee and petit fours at the wedding and she was going home, well, to the stores, to pack. Pack for her new home, her new beginning. Perhaps Johnnie was right. Perhaps part of her had been envious of Megan going off to university on an adventure. Perhaps that was what she wanted too; she wasn’t sure. But one thing she was certain of, she was going on this journey alone; in her career, her parenting and herself.
‘Louise! Wait!’ Johnnie called.
Louise didn’t listen. She just kept on walking, feeling happier than she had done in months.
Chapter Sixty-Five
Edward looked out of the French doors in the living room of the Old Rectory, over to where the workmen were taking down the marquee. He had done as Pam had directed and not returned to the wedding. James had gone off on his honeymoon without coming to see him. Not even Drew had called by.
It appeared his family had abandoned him.
‘All that money spent on a wedding and you didn’t even get to sample a glass of champagne.’
Edward turned to see a Lycra-clad Lottie, hair tied up in a messy bun with no make-up on, standing in the doorway to the living room.
‘By the looks of things, you had more than one.’ He chuckled. ‘Curious Lottie; why doesn’t it surprise me that you’re the one who’s come to visit?’
Lottie stared at him, expressionless. He couldn’t read her at all. Was she cross? Angry? Please don’t let her have come out of sympathy.
‘You can cut the bullshit with me, Edward. I’ll make us coffee.’
Edward sighed and dragged himself away from the view of the garden. Why did he feel that he was in for a lecture? No doubt she’d come as judge, jury and executioner on Jack and Pamela’s behalf.
‘Sit down,’ she said, setting a tray of two steaming mugs down on the glass coffee table, before sitting down herself.
He chose the sofa opposite her. ‘Before you start—’
‘How do you know what I’m here for?’ She handed him his coffee.
‘Thanks.’ He set the mug down on a coaster. ‘Well, you’re bound to be here on Pam and your father’s behalf.’
She raised her eyebrows and blew on her steaming mug. They sat in silence. He was the one used to creating awkward silences; they tended to manipulate people into doing what he wanted. How was she using his own weapon against him?
‘Well, they’re back together.’ He couldn’t bear her accusatory stare any longer. ‘They’re bound to want me out of here.’
She set her mug down and clasped her hands between her thighs. ‘I didn’t know you born in the Cotswolds.’
‘What?’
‘It came out in a conversation, a couple of weeks ago, down the pub. Pamela mentioned it.’
He frowned. She’d totally sidestepped him. ‘What’s that got to do with anything?’
She shrugged. ‘I thought you were from Yorkshire, that’s all. You have a Yorkshire accent.’
‘I was sent up here as boy, when I was about ten. Kids make fun of you for being different. I sounded posh; I soon learned to drop my accent and develop a local one.’
‘Make fun?’
‘Yes.’ He frowned again. It was like she was playing games with his mind.
‘Must have been quite hard for you.’
‘It was, especially when my parents had sent me away.’
‘Sent you away?’
There she went again. He mustn’t let her in!
He shrugged. ‘I don’t see what this has to do with the here and now.’
Lottie rested back on the sofa and pursed her lips together. ‘Depends on one’s perspective, I guess.’
‘What is this?’ he suddenly snapped. ‘Have you been dabbling in the finer points of psychotherapy, or something? I don’t want to talk about my childhood, thank you very much.’
Lottie nodded. ‘Interesting.’
‘No, it’s not interesting!’ He found himself shouting. ‘Why don’t you just tell me the ultimatum you’ve come to deliver, and we can both get on!’
Her face was expressionless again. No fear. No surprise. No amusement either. If anything, it just remained intrigued.
‘No wonder your father calls you naturally curious,’ he muttered.
‘Well, here’s a thing.’ There was an element of sarcasm in Lottie’s voice. ‘I am definitely that. And that’s why I’m here, really. I’m trying to understand. I’m trying to understand why you took Pamela away to Oxford for all those years and made her lie about her parents being dead? I’m trying to understand why you decided to move the construction workers in to the development on your son’s wedding day? And, I’m really trying very hard to understand why you lied about your cancer?’
She locked eyes with him, and he found himself trying his hardest not to look away. He was used to intimidating people, not the other way around.
‘I have got cancer.’ he said, quietly.
‘Did.’ Her voice was calm but there was an air of irritation in it. ‘Did have cancer, now lying dormant, under control, certainly not dying anytime soon.’
He picked up his coffee and took a sip while he considered how to play this. Was she calling his bluff? Did she really know the truth? Part of him wanted to keep up the pretence, however, the larger part was fed up of lying; he’d made a career out of lying.
‘How did you find out?’
She looked away. ‘I may have been looking for a recipe in Pamela’s cookery books.’
‘Pah!’ he almost spat out his coffee. ‘You were snooping!’
‘Yes.’ She held her hands up. ‘You’ve caught me out. I was looking for some evidence, but,’ she hurried on, ‘you were going to get found out sooner or later, weren’t you? Like when you didn’t die.’
Edward took a deep breath. ‘I suppose so.’ It was strange, but it felt something like relief that Lottie had discovered his secret. And the oddest thing seemed to be she wasn’t judging him for it either.
‘Why though?’
‘Isn’t that obvious?’
‘
Well, I’ve pondered that for a while now. It’s such a monumental thing to lie about.’
‘I know,’ he said, hanging his head in shame.
‘The obvious answer is Pamela, but I think it goes deeper than that, doesn’t it? Last year, you didn’t want Drew to leave Hardwickes and start up on his own. Do you remember you gave me that challenge of selling a property in a day and I got an offer on Clunderton Hall?’
‘That was a hefty helping of luck,’ Edward said, chuckling to himself as he recalled how he’d made Lottie fume.
‘See! There you are, laughing about it. You seem to get great pleasure at other people’s downfalls.’
‘No.’ He shook his head. ‘It wasn’t like that; I wanted to challenge you, so that you would make a sale, and you did.’
‘You still tried to manipulate Drew, so he wouldn’t go it alone.’
Edward reluctantly nodded.
‘So, why do you do it?’
He shook his head. ‘I really don’t know.’
‘Well, I think I do. I think you don’t like others having what you can’t have. Pamela came from a happy family; you took her away from that. You wanted to keep Drew in his place, and me for that matter, because we might, one day, achieve more than you. You preyed on Rebecca and began an affair – knowing how much she’d meant to James all those years – then dropped her like a sack of potatoes, without thinking for one second about her feelings, and when Dad finally got together with Pamela, you tried to win her back again.’
Silence again. Lottie was right, of course, but it was painful to admit.
‘Do you know, I thought perhaps you might have come here to have it out with me—’
‘I have, sort of.’
‘—yes, but I thought it was to just have a go at me. But,’ he looked at Lottie and didn’t find any judgement in her eyes, ‘you seem to have come with empathy instead.’
She nodded, vigorously. ‘Because I want to understand why you continue to behave so horribly.’
Edward’s mouth dropped. ‘Is that what you think of me, that I’m horrible?’ Horrible wasn’t detestable. It wasn’t calling him a nasty bastard, either. It sounded awfully human.