by Nina Auril
“What the fuck?!” I only barely register the guard’s shout. I’m too lost in the sound of her laughter.
“Flint, you crazy fuck. Where the fuck did you get this lighter?!” The lighter is ripped from my hands and I’m pulled to my feet, but still my eyes are only on her. A fist goes into my stomach but I hardly feel the pain, I’m too lost in how beautiful she is. Those eyes of hers trained on mine. She hasn’t said a word to me but I don’t need words. Her eyes say everything.
She’s for me.
I’m for her.
My Avalon.
My Thirteen.
I hold her eyes until I’m dragged off into the building. I dig my feet into the ground to stop them from pulling me away from her but the baton behind my knees causes me to fall down and the connection is broken.
They stuff me into that room again. The quiet one with the grubby walls. The one with the musty smell. But this time I don’t care. The silence doesn’t bother me because all I hear is her laughter, over and over in my head. I don’t see the faded blood stains on the padded walls because all I see are those eyes and the tattoo on her neck.
Thirteen.
She’s for me.
I’m for her.
Avalon
After taking my lunch tray with the plastic fork, spoon, and knife I sit in the corner of the cafeteria. I look around for the guy I saw in the garden, Flint, but he’s nowhere to be seen. I wonder what they have done to him as I play with his lighter. I found it in the hallway. The guards were tossing and searching a room, probably Flint’s room. But they were stupid, they didn’t even notice the lighter that slipped from the guard’s pocket who took it from Flint and it landed right in front of my feet. The shoelace tying trick worked well on the guard who was supposed to guide me but instead was too busy checking out my ass and trying to find a way to touch me again. But in the end, I got his lighter; victory is mine.
I see the pervert guard looking at me from across the room, smirking. I glance away and that’s when I see him, Flint. Our eyes meet across the room like they are two magnets. I can’t look away. There’s something in his eyes that I like so much, like he’s talking to me without words, like he’s in my mind.
A nurse pushes my medicine towards me and breaks our eye contact. I glare at her.
“Take these,” she snaps.
“I’m not taking any of those,” I say loudly.
“You have no choice. Take these like a good little girl or I’ll force them down your throat if I have to,” she grits out.
I’m about to yell at her when I see Flint standing behind her, he shakes his head and opens his mouth a little, lifting his tongue up before winking at me.
Oh, I get what he’s trying to say.
“Fine,” I huff at the nurse and chuck the medicines. I carefully put them under my tongue and open my mouth for her to check. Bitch doesn’t even think of checking under the tongue.
“Thank you,” I whisper at Flint when the nurse leaves.
“N-n-no p-p-problem,” he stutters.
I smile at him. He’s the sweetest person I’ve seen since I stepped into this madhouse. Even his stutter is sweet. Also, he is so hot. I look at him carefully. Bronze skin like the sun loves him so much it’s peppered his body with kisses, green eyes that chain me to my place, full lips that look so soft I have to bite my lip to stop myself from saying something stupid, like that I want to kiss those lips. Shaking my head, I look away from his lips. He has tattoos everywhere I can see, his arms, his neck, his chest that peeks out from one of the V-neck t-shirts they give us.
I look back at his face and see he’s checking me out, too.
I grin. “You should look at the lunch in front of you like that, not me.”
His eyes find mine. “Wh-what?”
“You’re looking at me like I’m dessert.”
“I- I… I’m…” he stutters. His strong jaw ticks and frustration rolls off of him. “F-f-fuck,” he growls.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“My…” he takes a deep breath before trying again. “My lighter. It… it helps me,” he says.
I smile at him. “Then I may have something for you.”
He looks at me with questions in his eyes and I move to the chair right next to him. I look around to see if any guards are watching us, but no one is paying attention. Leaning into him, I touch his hand. He swallows, his whole body tenses as he gives me the hottest look I’ve ever seen. Smoldering and intense.
I lick my lips and put the lighter into his palm under the table. His eyes widen and I shrug.
He gives me a dazzling smile before counting under his breath. When he reaches thirteen he asks, “How d-d-did you get this?”
“The guard dropped it so I took it.”
“Yo-you could’ve gotten into t-t-trouble.”
I shrug again. “Then I would kick him in the balls. I don’t like the way he touches me anyway, it would be good revenge.”
He frowns. His jaw tenses and he sends daggers the guard’s way. He’s about to stand up when I touch his hand again. “It’s okay. You were telling me something.” I say to distract him.
He doesn’t look away from the guard as he murmurs, “What?”
“When I said you were looking at me like I’m dessert.”
He looks down with a smirk on his face. He turns the wheel of the lighter thirteen times before he speaks, “I was about to say th-that I’m sure you taste so much better than anything they give us here.”
My breath hitches. My body throbs with joy. I lean into him when he sits back next to me. “I hope you’ll find out,” I whisper.
Flint
I lay in my bed and hold the lighter in my hand up so the moonlight streaming into my window casts it’s light over it. My fingers trace the line of the smile on my lips. The smile that’s been here the entire day. Since I saw her beautiful face and she slipped the lighter into my palm. My hand still tingles when I remember the sensation of her touching me. The shivers that ran up my spine and closed its fist around my heart.
One, two… three, four… I count the beats.
… five, six… seven, eight…
Nobody has ever given me anything. Nobody has ever risked anything for me.
...nine, ten… eleven, twelve…
But she did.
Because I’m for her.
She’s for me.
...thirteen…
I throw my feet off the bed and reach for my book. I tear out a page and begin folding a lily. A flower as beautiful as she is. When I’m done I slip it into my pocket and take my thirteen steps to the door. I peak out of the glass window and check that nobody is in the hallway. They never are. They drug us to keep us asleep and then sit in their office playing cards and joke about us. The crazies. The animals.
I reach for the paperclip I stole from the doctor’s office this afternoon. Unfurling it I press it into the keyhole of my door. I twist and wriggle it until I hear the click of the door unlocking. When you grow up like I did, you learn some things. I’ve never attempted this here before, had no reason to. But I won’t be able to sleep until I’ve seen her smile again.
I slip out of my room and pad softly down the hall. It’s quiet. No screams or sobs tonight. I make a right at the end of the hall and enter the female wing. I get down on my hands and knees and crawl under the guard’s window. I straighten and flatten myself against the wall. Then I hear it. A soft whimpering followed by male laughter. As I get closer to her room, the sounds become louder. I frown when I see her door is slightly ajar.
It takes me a second or two to make sense of the scene before me. The first thing I see are the grey sweatpants on the floor. The standard issue uniform every inmate is given. Thin and scratchy. My eyes flick up to the bed. Avalon’s legs are bare except for the knee length socks, panties tangled around one ankle. I frown as my eyes trail up to the hairy hand in between her thighs.
Rage fills me. It rises up in me like a sinister shadow, engulfing every
sell and blood vessel in my body.
“That’s a good girl.” I hear the guard whisper in her ear. Her body arches off the bed in an attempt to fight him off but her ankles and wrists are tied and the hand over her mouth prevents her from crying out. They don’t restrain us here. That’s left for the poor suckers in the basement.
How long has this been going on for? Since she was committed?
I pad forward, trying to stay as silent as possible, but it doesn’t matter. The guard is too engrossed in his disgusting act to even notice me creeping up on him. I bend down to pick up her discarded pants and fold one leg around my fist. I take another step and then as fast as a cat I wrap the cloth around his neck and pull him off her.
He’s caught off balance and we both fall back. His weight on me is heavy but I don’t let go. Instead, I enjoy the sound of him gasping for air and the sight of his bulging eyes and the hands clawing at his neck. I pull harder, and then harder still until I feel his heavy body jerk and then go limp, the life leaving him.
I don’t have time to catch my breath or process what just happened. My only thought is on Avalon. I make quick work of untying the straps holding her down and then help her pull her panties back up. Her eyes are hollow, emotionless except for my own rage I see reflected there.
I look back at the guard on the floor with his bloodshot, bulging eyes, hands frozen around his neck. We can’t leave him like this.
I bend down over him and undo his belt. Stripping off his pants, I throw it towards Avalon. “P-put that on.” I grab the can of mace that fell on the floor during our struggle. They use it to restrain us. Sometimes they use it on us just for fun. Now it’s my turn.
I dig the lighter out of my pocket and aim my makeshift flamethrower at his face and watch the flames licking at him until the can of mace is empty. I pull the sheets off her bed and throw it over the guard, waiting until that too catches fire. Avalon grabs the few books from her desk and tears out papers before crumpling them and adding it to our bonfire.
“We have to get out of here.” I whisper as I grab her hand and pull her to the door. The last thing I do before we slip out of the room is throw the empty can into the fire. We are already three doors up when I hear the explosion. We turn a corner and flatten ourselves against the wall.
The fire alarm sounds and then all hell breaks loose. Doors are released and patients come spilling into the hallway, guards are scrambling to create order but that’s easier said than done with a bunch of crazies. I grab Avalon’s arm and we keep our heads down as we mingle with the other patients. Smoke fills up the hallways and everyone is pushing and shoving to get outside but Avalon and I keep calm, hidden in the crowd and looking for an opportunity to escape out of all the chaos. There is always less staff at night than during the day. Something that will count in our favor.
We spill outside onto the lawn and while the guards try to herd everyone together, I grab Avalon and tug her behind a garden shed. When I’m sure all the guards are too distracted to notice us, we make a run for it. We run without looking back, we run until we reach the furthest fence and I help her over. We don’t stop. We run until our chests ache and our breathing is labored and our limbs cramp up in revolt. But we keep going. We run until the only thing we see is the thick cloud of smoke peaking out over the tree line.
We stop and stare at each other, catching our breaths. Her face is grimy, I’m sure mine is too. I don’t know what to do next. I got us this far, my only thought is to get her to safety. To get her out of that place, but now we’re here engulfed by trees and darkness.
“I..I-I…” I claw at my hair in frustration then my hands grab at her body, inspecting every inch of her. “A-are you o-ok? A-a.. D-d-did he h-h-hurt y-y-... I-is there…”
She grabs my head and pulls my face close to her. “I’m ok Flint. You saved me. You saved me, I’m ok. We’re ok.”
I close my eyes in relief and pull her body to mine. I let the feel of her against me wash a calm over me.
“What do we do now?” She whispers.
I open my eyes and spot faint lights off in the distance. They look like headlights moving through the trees. There must be a road there.
“That way,” I grab her hand and lead her towards the lights. “We have to go that way.”
Avalon
I’m tired.
I’m tired and scared and still running. My throat is killing me, it’s itching and running isn’t helping.
“G-gas station,” Flint pants, pulling me toward the lights.
We slow down a little as the lights get closer and closer. I look down at our joined hands, he’s never let my hand go since we ran away from the asylum.
I shudder when the memory of that bastard seeps into my mind. He went too far this time. He’d never taken off my panties or tied me down to the bed since I got committed to that place. I didn’t stay there for long, but he sure as hell used every chance he could get to touch me.
When we finally stop in front of the store at the gas station I start coughing. I can’t breathe, my chest contracts and my vision goes black.
“W-water. Y-you need water,” Flint says, panicked. He pulls me inside the shop and walks between the aisles. Grabbing a bottle he opens the cap and places the bottle to my lips. I gulp down half of the bottle. The cold water is total bliss for my sore throat.
“Hey! What are you two doing there?! You need to pay,” the cashier hollers at us.
Hand in hand with Flint, we walk toward him. “W-w-we don’t have m-mo-money” Flint starts to explain. “We… we’ve been in an a-ac-accident.
The cashier huffs, but nods at us. “Okay, that’s on me, then. You should call 911, but it’s Halloween so I don’t know if they’d really believe any phone calls,” he says and goes back to his desk.
“T-Th-Thank you, mate,” I hear Flint say, but my focus is on something else… on somebody else; on the guy wearing a priest’s costume and mimicking Flint to the girl next to him. He mocks his stutter and the girl in her ridiculously slutty school girl costume is laughing like it’s the funniest thing she ever heard.
“T-Th-Thank you, mate,” I hear the guy says through his laughter.
“Did you see the look on their faces? They’re freaks,” the girl joins his mocking, laughing even louder.
“Leave it. I-I’m used to it,” Flint whispers at me when we get out of the shop. His eyes are sad and he bows his head slightly. That breaks my heart. He’s amazing. He saved me. He’s kind, handsome, strong…
Kill them, Avy.
They deserve to die.
Kill them.
I smile at myself.
Okay, Daddy, I think to myself before letting Flint’s hand go.
“What hap-happened? Wh-where are you go-going?”
I see the sign on the right, where the couple went. “Restroom. I’ll be back.”
“Okay. I-I need to clean up, too,” he says and walks to the restrooms with me.
I wait until he goes into males’ and smile when I see the couple heading toward the ladies’ room, kissing and giggling. I didn’t think they would make it so easy for me.
I touch the pocketknife in my pocket. I’m glad Flint’s given me the guard’s pants. The fucker brought a pocketknife with him, probably to cut me out of the ropes he tied me with.
I grit my teeth, the rage filling me up as I remember that moment, how fucking vulnerable I felt. I shake my head and enter the ladies’ room.
The couple is fucking against the wall, their clothes are tossed on the floor; they couldn’t even wait to get inside one of the stalls it seems. I pad toward them slowly, waiting for the perfect moment. They don’t hear me as they are busy moaning and grunting like animals. And just when they break apart from their heavy kissing I let my knife lick across the guy’s neck.
The blood sprays over the girl, causing her to freeze with shock and before she can even scream I stab her repeatedly until I can feel the calm in my veins.
I look down at the two people,
lying in front of my feet with their blood gushing out of their wounds, their lives leaving their miserable bodies.
I smile as I leave them there. Just when I’m about to go out of the door I remember the words the cashier said.
It’s Halloween.
Grabbing the girl’s clothes from the floor, I put them on. The pleated skirt barely covers my panties, the white shirt is so thin it’s almost see through. My knee length socks are the only things that give me some kind of warmth, but I look different. They would never recognize me in these clothes so a little cold is something I could deal with. Everything is splattered with blood but who would even think it was real on Halloween.
I lift the priest costume in my arms and leave the ladies’ room. Flint’s already waiting for me there and his eyes widen when he sees me. His eyes roam over me, his lips parted as he takes a few steps toward me.
“Avalon…” he breathes out.
The way he looks at me warms me from head to toe. My body throbs with excitement, my skin breaks into goosebumps and I shiver at the tingling sensation running through my spine.
“You’d better wear this,” I whisper. I don’t know why I’m whispering, but whatever it is between us made the air thick with tension and I don’t want to break this spell I’m under.
“What have y-you done?” he whispers slowly. There’s not judgment in his words, only curiosity and maybe a little bit of wonder, adoration.
I smile shyly. “They won’t be able to mock you anymore.”
“Y-y-you killed them?”
I nod.
“For me?”
I nod again.
He licks his lips. His eyes linger on my breasts. When he lifts his eyes back at me, they’re on fire. My breath hitches, my mouth dries.
“Wait for me here,” he murmurs and enters the ladies’ room. A few minutes later when he gets out he’s in priest clothes and he looks sinfully attractive.
“We need to h-hide them or b-burn them,” he says. His voice is serious, but his eyes have a hard time focusing somewhere other than my breasts.