by Jillian Hart
“Then we can be horrible together.” Ruby folded back the driving robe and scooted over to make room for her friend. “I can’t carry a tune.”
“I can’t hold a note.” Earlee, adorable in her fur-lined cloak, tucked her lunch pail, schoolbooks and slate onto the floorboards before settling on the cushioned seat. “You all have to be honest with me. If I’m bringing down the quality of the caroling, I will bow out joyfully.”
“That goes for me, too.” Ruby’s head jerked as the sleigh took off. “Why am I seeing disaster?”
“You always see disaster.” Lila chuckled.
“I’m trying to keep my spirits up, but it’s harder than it looks.” Her words made everyone in the sleigh laugh, so the atmosphere was merry as Miss Bradshaw pulled them down the road to the white, steepled church.
“Do you think Lorenzo will be there?” Scarlet asked as the sleigh bumped to a stop.
Yes. Ruby bit her lip to keep in the word. Because if she said she knew that Lorenzo would be coming, think of the questions! How on earth could she explain what had happened over her lunch break?
“He sang in the caroling group last year, remember?” Meredith was the first to climb out into the snow. “It stands to reason he will sing this year, too.”
“Ruby, you work for the family.” Lila took Meredith’s hand and climbed carefully from the front seat. “Did you get a chance to ask him if he’s coming tonight?”
“He’s coming.” Her heart skipped a beat. No questions, she prayed as she stumbled onto the icy ground. Her shoes skidded, and she groped for the side of the sleigh before her feet went out from under her.
“Whoopsy.” Scarlet caught her elbow, helping to steady her. “Are you okay?”
“Sure, as long as I don’t step on that patch of ice again.” She smiled. It seemed as if no one would quiz her about Lorenzo, because her friends started calling out to Kate, who gave the final buckle of her horse’s blanket a tug before trudging their way. Perfect timing.
“Guess who is walking this way? He must have left his horse at the livery.” Kate swiped snowflakes out of her eyes. “Did he get extra handsome when we weren’t looking?”
“I think so.” Scarlet squinted through the downfall where a man’s shadow skirted the side of the church. “Every time I look at him, my heart goes thump.”
“Unrequited love is rough on a girl.” Kate sighed as they watched him stride closer.
“Very,” Scarlet agreed. “I feel so sorry for you, Kate. I’m sure he’s about to fall in love with me any minute.”
“No, because he’s about to fall in love with me,” Kate argued good-naturedly and they dissolved into muffled laughter. “What about you, Ruby? Aren’t you going to pine after Lorenzo with us?”
Good question. Even from a distance, she could feel his presence. Her heart tugged, her spirit stilled. She blinked snowflakes off her lashes, staring down at the patch on her shoe. “Are you kidding? You two have been admiring him much longer than me, so you should get dibs.”
“Hey, less competition for me.” Scarlet gave Ruby’s hand a squeeze. “Look, he’s heading into the church. If we time it right, we’ll be right ahead of him. He’ll have to notice us.”
“No, I want to help Meredith with her horse. You two go on.” Shame washed over her. It was all she could do to give Scarlet a reassuring smile and a nod to go ahead. Her friends were in love with Lorenzo. How could that enormous fact slip her mind? She watched Kate and Scarlet scamper arm in arm up the walkway, Lorenzo approaching.
How would they feel if they knew about this afternoon? That Lorenzo hadn’t simply been courteous to her, he’d been friendly. No, more than friendly. A horrible feeling clutched her stomach, proof she’d done something wrong. It was like going behind their backs to move in on the man both Kate and Scarlet wanted. It wasn’t like that—that wasn’t what had happened—but that’s how she felt.
She loved her friends so dearly. She couldn’t jeopardize their friendship. Ever. That was the most important reason of all for her to keep her eyes down. No more looking at Lorenzo and wishing.
She heard his boots crunch in the snow. His gait stopped. Her face heated, but she did not look up. She knew he was looking her way. Nervous, she spun around and spied the horse blanket tucked under the front seat.
“Thanks for picking me up, Meredith.” She unwedged the folded wool from beneath the springs. “But you can’t go out of your way for every practice.”
“Hopefully, we won’t have to drag you to those. And if we do, my term is done in a few more weeks. No more teaching, so I’ll have plenty of time to talk you into loving caroling practice.” Meredith gave the knot she’d tied at the tether post a tug to test it and satisfied, circled around to take charge of the blanket.
“Great.” Ruby rolled her eyes. It was nice being wanted. “So, do you mean done with teaching? Or done as in the term is over?”
“This will be my last term. At least for now.”
“But teaching is so important to you. I thought you loved it.” She hated being aware of the crackle of a man’s boots in the snow. Lorenzo. Had he been standing still watching all this time? Dismay seized her stomach.
“I love my work, but I love Shane more.” She shook out the warm horse blanket. Happiness lit her up. Being engaged and in love with Shane looked good on her. “I can’t wait any longer to start our life together. I can’t stand being apart from him.”
“Does this mean you’ve set a wedding date?” Just forget Lorenzo, she told herself. Don’t listen to him walking away. “How soon will you get married?”
“After the new year, but don’t tell anyone. I planned to announce it tonight when we took a break.” Beaming, Meredith settled the blanket over the mare’s broad back. “Shane has bought the Beckham place.”
“That big ranch that was for sale? Oh, this means you and Fiona will be neighbors. How wonderful!” She gave Meredith a hug. She thanked God how beautifully her friend’s life was coming together. Her teeth started chattering.
“It’s cold out here. Go in, get out of this weather.” Meredith knelt to fasten the blanket. “Don’t look at me like that, I can get the buckles myself. Go on with you. Teacher’s orders.”
“All right, if you are sure.”
“I’m sure. No reason both of us should get colder.” Meredith knelt to secure the first buckle. Miss Bradshaw waited patiently, twitching her tail as the snow gathered on her mane.
Lorenzo. She hadn’t taken two steps before he stopped on the path ahead of her, stopped and glanced over his wide shoulder. Their gazes collided. For one instant she forgot everything—her job, her family, her duty, her friends. The dreams buried in her soul surfaced. What would it be like to be beaued by him? To see the caring in his eyes shine only for her?
Footsteps padded behind her, fast and hurried, petticoats rustled as someone rushed up the path in a hurry. Not Meredith, she realized too late.
“What are you doing here, Rags?” Narcissa Bell circled around her as if she were avoiding a rodent in her path. “Don’t tell me you’re singing tonight?”
No need to answer. She held her chin steadily, refusing to let her head drop. Why Narcissa? Why now?
“Well, that’s the trouble with church.” She dropped her voice so only Ruby could hear. “They let in just any poor trash. Lorenzo, wait for me! Lorenzo?”
She tried to keep her chin up, she really did, but it bobbed down of its own accord. Narcissa ran away on her beautiful, perfect, brand-new shoes, racing to catch up to Lorenzo.
“Are you okay, Ruby?” Meredith took her hand. “I could bring her down a peg. In fact, maybe I will do just that.”
“Please, don’t. I’m fine.”
“I heard what she said to you. It was just plain mean.”
“I would rather forget it. Turn the other cheek.” Not only was it her faith, but she could not risk Lorenzo overhearing. She was embarrassed enough. No doubt he was wondering why she hadn’t spoken to him, why she had
n’t smiled, when he’d expressed interest in her being here tonight. Her heart twisted with raw pain, and it wasn’t because of Narcissa.
The instant she stepped into the church, the low, pleasant rumble of his voice rose above all the others. She shrugged out of her coat, hardly aware of hanging it on a peg, and followed Meredith into the sanctuary.
Maybe if she didn’t meet his gaze, he would simply stop liking her. Things could go back to the way they used to be before she accepted her first ride in his sleigh.
“Gather ’round!” Reverend Hadly clapped, pitching his voice above the merry chatter of the carolers. “Grab a music book on your way up here. What a big group we have this year.”
Lorenzo. She could feel the tug of his gaze, like gravity pulling her. Melted snow glistened in his thick, brown hair. Was it her imagination, or did he seem even taller, his shoulders mountain-strong, his presence more riveting?
He’d become more handsome since she’d seen him last. Kate was right.
It’s better if you stopped liking him, Ruby. Just find a way to turn your feelings off. A book was shoved in her hands. She blinked against the overly bright lamplight. “Thanks, Meredith.”
“Ruby? You’re a soprano like Kate. Come this way.” Meredith’s voice came as if from miles away.
Dimly, she followed her friend, accepted a place next to Kate at the far end of the group.
The reverend’s pitch pipe blared, rising above the group’s chatter. Silence fell.
“Let’s warm up our voices. Sopranos.” The minister turned his attention to her section and held the note. “Ahhh.”
“Ahhs” erupted around her. Kate’s sweet soprano rang in her right ear. Scarlet, on her left, cozied up to whisper. “Sing, Ruby. You have a lovely voice.”
She wanted to argue—hers was by far the worst in the group—but that wasn’t the reason she didn’t sing. Lorenzo’s gaze found hers across the crowd of people and rising voices, silence amid the noise. Voices faded, the music dimmed until there was only the hint of his smile. Something deep within her heart leaped. How tempting to let herself sink into the feeling and into the caring in his eyes. How easy it would be to just let herself fall.
“Did you see?” Scarlet leaned in to whisper. “I think Lorenzo is looking at me.”
“No, he’s looking at me,” Kate murmured, eyes merry. “Do you see the look on his face?”
“One of pure love.” Scarlet sounded a little dreamy.
“Definitely,” Kate agreed. “You know what that means? He’s falling for one of us.”
“Finally.” Scarlet gave an endearing sigh. “Wishes really do come true.”
She wanted those wishes to be for Scarlet or Kate. They deserved them. They deserved Lorenzo. She tucked away her feelings, clenched the songbook more tightly and forced her gaze from his. There could be no more moments like this, no wondering what could be. Yes, this would definitely be much easier if she didn’t like him so much.
“Altos! Join in.” Reverend Hadly turned to the next group and offered them a lower pitch with his pipe. “Ahhhs” broke out in a chorus, a few voices off-key so he blew the pipe again.
Father, please give Kate or Scarlet a chance with Lorenzo. They both deserve great happiness. She hoped one of them would win Lorenzo’s heart. He was a good man, the very best. Absolutely good enough to marry and give one of her best friends a happily-ever-after.
“Very good!” The reverend praised. “Tenors. Here’s your note.”
Low-toned voices broke out in a slow, steady pitch. Why could she pick out Lorenzo’s voice amid all the others? She tried to close her ears to him. Impossible. She could not close her heart, either.
Ruby wasn’t making this easy for him. Lorenzo leaned forward in his chair in the busy diner. Had Pa already spoken to her, the way he’d been warned earlier? Or had Lucia done it? Anger burned in his chest. But what could he do about it? He glanced across the room where she sat at a far table talking with her friends. Not once had she glanced his way. He knew, because he’d been watching her.
“Can you believe some people?” Narcissa leaned against his arm, seated beside him at the table. The clink and clatter of the diner came back into focus and he dragged his attention away from Ruby’s table. Narcissa laid her hand on his forearm. “Bringing her own food? To an eating establishment? A slice of pie is a nickel. Honestly. Who can’t afford that?”
He winced and shrugged off Narcissa’s hold on him. This was a side of Narcissa he didn’t like. She didn’t capture his attention, she wasn’t the one his interest returned to. Five tables away, Ruby nibbled on a cookie she’d packed, while a cup of tea steamed on the table in front of her. He was glad his mother had hired her. He wanted her life’s burdens to ease.
Which meant he couldn’t risk her job. No way.
“Not everyone is as fortunate as you are, Narcissa.” Margaret Roberts stirred honey into her tea. “Remember, it’s important to be charitable.”
“I am charitable.” Narcissa gave her ringlets a toss with the hand that wasn’t clutching his arm. “I go through my closet twice a year and contribute some very quality frocks to the church donation barrel.”
“I meant to feel Christian tolerance.” Margaret rolled her eyes. “That’s harder to do than to simply donate stuff you no longer want. I give away my used things, too.”
Ruby. He shifted in his chair to get a better view of her. Lamplight shone like pale moonlight on her long, silken hair and caressed her ivory complexion. The faint ripple of her laughter at something one of her friends said had to be the dearest sound on earth. Despite her laughter, her eyes held the same reserve he’d seen in the kitchen. Her withdrawal from him was subtle, but he felt it all the way to his soul.
He feared it was his father’s doing.
“Can you imagine having to wear secondhand clothes?” Narcissa’s high-pitched words sailed over the tops of the other conversations in the diner.
He bit his tongue, not wanting to be unkind to a woman, but he didn’t like Narcissa’s viewpoint or the fact that, tables away, Ruby stiffened. Pink crept across her endearing face. She had to have overheard.
“Clothes other people have worn? How disgusting.” Narcissa continued on. “Ugh. It gives me the shivers.”
“Hush.” He’d had enough. He pushed away from the table, the chair scraping angrily against the floor. “Stop picking on Ruby. I mean it, Narcissa. Not one more word.”
“Who, me?” Innocent eyes batted up at him. “I’m not picking on anyone. It’s not against the law to have an opinion.”
“Well, I don’t like it.” He clamped his molars together, so furious that staying silent seemed like the wisest choice. He yanked his jacket off the back of the chair and marched blindly away. And that was the woman his mother wanted him to court?
“You’re just jealous because she is the most beautiful girl in the room,” he heard Margaret say over the angry knell of his boots.
“Me? Jealous? Over patched rags like that?”
He tugged a fifty-cent piece out of his pocket and caught his buddy’s eye, who was still crowded around the table with the rest of the gang. James arched one eyebrow in a question. Lorenzo handed the coin over to their waitress.
“The pie was especially good tonight. Thanks, Teresa. Keep the change.” He buttoned up on his way out the door. The snowfall fell in whimsical, artful flakes. They sailed lightly on the wind, spiraling in fairy-tale swirls. They batted his cheek and whirled away on his breath, and when he glanced over his shoulder… Ruby. He could see her through the front window.
She chatted away with her friends, as dear as could be, sipping on her cup of tea. Her fine white-blond hair framed her face in carefree wisps and curls. Her cheeks were still flushed pink from Narcissa’s insult, but her quiet inner dignity shone through as she said something that made her friends chuckle.
Ruby was a gentle soul. He cared about her. He could not stop it. He didn’t even want to try. He wanted to spend time getting to k
now her, sharing stories and feeling the radiance of her smile, but her life was precarious. He feared his parents wouldn’t understand.
As if she felt his presence, she looked up. The smile drained from her mouth, the laughter from her face, as her gaze found his. In the space of one breath and the next, it felt as if their hearts connected, beating together as one. For one unguarded moment, he felt a longing so strong it buckled his knees. Was she wishing, too? Thinking she had to choose between keeping her job or their friendship?
The diner’s door swung open, and his friends spilled out onto the boardwalk.
“Lorenzo!” James rushed over, tying his scarf. Time lurched forward, and Ruby turned away, but the connection between them remained. “Did you see? Austin just drove by with his new horses. They are fine!”
“I didn’t notice.” He reached into his pockets for his gloves. Ruby’s back was to him, standing beside her table, gathering up her things.
“…patches,” Narcissa finished saying with the haughty disdain he didn’t like as she tumbled out the door. Innocent eyes met his. “Hi, Lorenzo. We were just talking about your family’s Christmas ball. Margaret and I have already been shopping.”
He shook his head, plunged his hands into his gloves and led the way down the street. Snowflakes flitted ahead and pirouetted around him like lost dreams impossible to catch.
Chapter Seven
Lord, please help me to do the right thing and avoid Lorenzo. Ruby wasn’t sure if her prayer was an appropriate one, since surely God was very busy tending to true problems in the world, but she had no one else to turn to. The frigid early morning gleamed black in every direction. Snow crunched beneath Solomon’s hooves, and the wind drove in straight from the north. She shivered, clenching her teeth to keep them from chattering.
It would be easier if Lorenzo wasn’t in the barn, if he didn’t greet her, if she couldn’t see the caring in his eyes. Caring she could never have or deserve. She could still hear Kate and Scarlet playfully arguing over him. Worse, she could still picture her father gray with exhaustion when she’d arrived home late. He’d been sick with fatigue, trying to handle the housework on top of the barn work and all day spent walking far and wide looking for work.