by Ali McNamara
I listen silently to Noah.
‘It might sound a little crazy, but sometimes it feels like this was all orchestrated to happen like this.’
‘How do you mean?’
‘I often wonder whether I had to leave the police so I could go on to do something better with my life that wouldn’t have happened if I’d stayed with them. I’m still to find out what that is, but if it’s just so I can run a little antiques shop that brings a few people pleasure, then I guess I’ll have to accept that.’
‘Doesn’t the shop bring you pleasure then?’
‘Yes, but I always have this nagging feeling there’s more to it. I’m just being silly probably.’
‘You could be right, I suppose. Daisy had a great belief in destiny and things happening for a reason. She used to say we all had paths that we had to follow – we could step off the path occasionally but eventually we’d be guided back on to it.’
‘That’s a nice way of thinking about it. Do you believe that?’
‘I’m not sure what I believe any more. Losing Daisy has shaken any little belief I might once have had. I’ve never been very spiritual. Daisy was always the one for that kind of thing.’
‘I’m not usually into that sort of stuff either. I just have this nagging thought that keeps occurring. Weird, really.’
‘Not necessarily. But to answer your earlier question, I don’t think I’ve been brought here for any other reason than to collect Daisy-Rose and drive her home, sad as that may be.’ I think about this for a moment. ‘You aren’t suggesting that Daisy had to die to help me in some way, are you?’ I ask, suddenly appalled. ‘Because if you are —’
‘No, no, not at all,’ Noah insists. ‘I would never be so insensitive. What I’m trying, obviously very badly, to say is that perhaps something good can come from her death. Perhaps you’ve come to St Felix not simply to collect an old camper van but to do something else as well?’
‘Like?’
‘Take those old postcards, for instance,’ Noah says, gesturing to the sitting room. ‘If you manage to trace Lou and return the cards to her, won’t that be a good thing to come out of this? You wouldn’t even be here if it hadn’t been for Daisy, would you, so you never would have found them in the camper van.’
Technically, it was Malachi that found them, but I decide not to point this out.
‘If I ever manage to trace Lou, then yes it would be a good thing.’ I sigh. ‘But it’s a very big “if” right now. I’ve read through all the new cards several times and I haven’t got any more clues from them at all. It’s so frustrating.’
‘I hope you don’t mind but I had a quick look through them while you were out.’
‘Nothing much in them that’s going to help us, is there?’
‘Hmm, that’s not strictly true…’
‘Why, what did you find?’ I sit forward excitedly.
‘Let me fetch the cards,’ Noah says, getting up. ‘I notice you file them all in date order – very efficient. I like that.’
Noah goes through the French window and then returns shortly afterwards with several postcards in his hand.
‘Look at this one first,’ he says, handing me a card. ‘It’s from Brighton and it’s dated June 1987.’
My Darling Frankie,
You’ll never guess what? I found a photo of you in a local newspaper today!
Some of my paintings are being shown in an exhibition here in Brighton, and the paper was simply lying around in the foyer of my hotel. I couldn’t believe it when I flicked through and saw a photo of you.
I recognised you straight away. Even though you’d aged a little (like we all have!) I still knew it was you immediately. Your lovely eyes are still the same as I remember them, and you’re just as handsome too.
It made my day – no, my whole year.
Forever yours,
Lou x
‘Now here’s a follow-up card written only days afterwards,’ Noah says, handing me that one now. ‘This one has St Felix on the front.’
My Darling Frankie,
I was so excited to see you again – if only in a photo – that I’ve decided to paint you!
It will be one of my first portraits as I’ve always stuck to landscapes before as that’s what people seem to like. But I know I can do this particular subject justice, as it’s always been one of my favourites!
I’ll let you know how I get on.
Forever yours,
Lou x
‘Now the third card,’ Noah says, handing it to me. ‘St Felix again, but it’s dated a few months later.’
My Darling Frankie,
I finished it! And I’m so proud; I really think I’ve done justice to you. I think I’ve worked harder on this than any other painting I’ve ever done, but I enjoyed it so much more too.
I’d like to hang this on the wall of my studio here in St Felix, but I think people would ask who the handsome man was! So I’ll hide it away somewhere where only I can see it.
I’m so pleased I picked up that newspaper. In the early days Mother kept me informed of your news and what you were up to, but just lately I’ve been wondering what and how you’re doing again, and now I know.
Congratulations to you. I hope your family are proud.
Forever yours,
Lou x
I look up at Noah. ‘I read these before, but I’m not sure why you’re so excited. All we know is that Frankie was in a local paper and that Lou was proud of what he’d done. But he could have done anything. So how does that help us?’
A knowing smile crosses Noah’s lips. ‘Local newspapers keep records, and if their digital records don’t extend that far, old copies are often backed up on microfiche.’
I look blankly at him.
‘Come on, Ana, keep up!’
‘We’re not all ex-cops,’ I say, raising an eyebrow. ‘Just tell me.’
‘If we can find out which newspaper this was, and I doubt there were that many local to Brighton back then, we can see if we can view some of their past copies. If we can, all we have to do is look at the ones from June 1987 and hopefully this Frankie will be named in one of the photos… If we can trace who Frankie is —’
‘We might be able to trace Lou too!’ I squeal excitedly. ‘You’re amazing, Noah!’ I jump up and hug him, then without thinking I kiss him on the cheek. ‘Thank you.’
Noah blinks calmly behind his glasses, but his cheeks tell a different tale. They’re now very pink indeed.
‘It’s my pleasure,’ he says, in an equally calm voice. ‘We can do this, Ana. If we stick together, we can do this. I know it.’
Twenty-Six
‘Guess what’s happened?’ I say breathlessly to Malachi, when I visit him the next day at the garage.
‘You’ve fallen madly in love with me and your heart at just the mere sight of me has started beating wildly out of control?’ He slides himself out from underneath Daisy-Rose, the usual mischievous grin on his face.
‘Ha ha. Actually, I walked up here quite quickly so that’s why I’m breathing a little heavily.’
‘Shame. So, what’s all the excitement?’ Malachi pulls himself up, then cleans his hands on a rag from his pocket. ‘Wait, should we get coffee first?’
Malachi makes the coffee this time, then while we perch on our usual bucket and tyres I tell him all about what has happened with Noah, leaving out anything I didn’t think was relevant, like Noah’s jealousy and the kiss…
‘So you two had a barbecue together… very nice. Is that what you always do on a first date?’
‘What do you mean?’ I ask, thrown by his question. I’d been expecting him to ask me more about Frankie and the newspapers.
‘Have you forgotten already? I’m hurt,’ Malachi says dramatically, tossing his head to the side.
I stare blankly at him.
‘Our moonlit barbecue,’ Malachi reminds me, ‘where I think you said my sausages were the best you’d ever tasted.’
‘I don’
t think I said that exactly, did I?’
‘Close enough. So you barbecued with Noah too… I should be hurt, but fish?’ He pulls a face. ‘I suppose you had a loaf of bread with your fishes? That’s so Matthew 14:13-21, not Noah at all.’
‘Ha ha, very funny,’ I say drily.
‘So Noah thinks he can find this Frankie from the newspaper, does he?’
‘If we can find the newspaper that Lou saw him in. It’s a bit of a long shot but we don’t have anything else.’
‘Worth a try, I guess.’
‘I think so. Noah is ringing around today to see if we can view the records of local papers at that time.’
‘What would you do without him, eh?’
‘He’s been very helpful with the postcards, that’s for sure. Just like you’ve been with Daisy-Rose,’ I add hurriedly, in case there’s a repeat of last night’s jealousy but the other way around. However, I was sure Malachi’s flirting was just high spirits on his part; he was probably the same with all women… not that I’d ever seen him with any.
‘She’s certainly coming on,’ Malachi says, looking at the van. ‘As you saw last time you were here, she has all her doors now and a new front light, and just this morning I’ve given her a brand new windscreen. I’ve patched up all the rust now, so I’ll be ready to start spray-painting her very soon.’
Daisy-Rose currently looks like a patchwork quilt of many shades: there’s her original red, the pale blue door, many patches of pink where Malachi has touched up her rust spots, and one small square of new metallic dark red paint on her side.
‘I’ve tested the new colour,’ Malachi says, pointing to the new patch, ‘and I think it’s going to look pretty amazing on her.’
‘I agree. She’s going to look wonderful, of that I have no doubt. You seem to be making so much progress – every time I come here she looks different. I have to give it to you, Malachi, you certainly work fast.’
‘I have had a bit of help,’ Malachi admits. ‘A couple of lads from the town come in and help me some evenings.’
‘Do they? I didn’t know that.’
‘Yeah, I wouldn’t be making this much progress without them. I’m not a magician, you know?’
‘There was me thinking you were working miracles all on your own, when all the time you had help.’ I laugh, but Malachi sighs.
‘Chance would be a fine thing,’ he mutters. ‘Miracles aren’t allowed yet.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Nothing,’ he says hurriedly. ‘Forget I said anything. Being so quiet here at the garage has helped too.’
‘I wonder why that is. The rest of the town seems so busy.’
Malachi shrugs. ‘Me being so quiet means your van gets completed quicker and you get to leave here all the faster. So it’s all good.’
Was that such a good thing now? I was beginning to wonder…
‘Everything happens for a reason,’ I say, without thinking. ‘Oh, someone else was saying something similar to me only yesterday.’
‘Someone being… Noah?’
‘Possibly.’
‘And what made him come out with that little bumper sticker gem?’
‘Don’t mock him.’
‘I’m not… but it is a favourite slogan that people hook into to make bad things happening to them seem good.’
‘I quite like it actually.’
‘Oh, do you?’
‘Yes.’
‘Give me an instance then.’
‘Of?’
‘Of everything happening for a reason.’
‘Well, I can’t right now… I’d have to think about it.’
‘You see?’
‘I see nothing, only a lack of memory, that’s all. Hang on a minute…’ I think hard again, determined to prove him wrong. ‘There was a time when Daisy and I were at university.’ I glance at Malachi.
‘Go on,’ he encourages.
‘Well, Daisy decided she was giving it all up to follow her boyfriend, Peter, up to Scotland.’
‘And?’
‘And I thought at the time she was making a terrible mistake giving everything up like that for a man, but it turned out really well for her. She was happy, they got married and they had two gorgeous boys together.’
‘And?’ Malachi asks. ‘There has to be more to that story if you want me to accept it as proof that everything happens for a reason.’
I shrug.
‘Okay… how did you feel when Daisy left?’
‘Awful.’
‘Did you hate her for leaving you?’
‘A bit,’ I admit. ‘But everything turned out all right in the end.’
‘For her or for you?’
I think about this. ‘For both of us, I guess.’
‘Why? I know why for Daisy, you just told me that. But why for you in particular?’
‘It made me more determined to do well at uni, I suppose.’
‘You suppose, or it actually did?’
‘I asked you once before if you’d ever been a shrink in a past life,’ I joke. ‘And you said no, but you sure sound like one sometimes!’
Malachi seems to consider this. ‘Look, I’m just trying to help. If you don’t want my help…’ A look of rejection settles on his face.
‘You can stop the play-acting!’ I think again about Brighton. ‘Okay, yes, it definitely made me more determined and more independent too. I’d always relied a lot on Daisy before – she was the driving force in our relationship. When she left I had to grow up, stand on my own two feet a bit more. It changed me.’
‘For the good?’
‘Yeah, I’d say so.’
Malachi holds out his hands in a ‘there you go’ gesture. ‘You see, something good came of something you perceived to be bad at the time. It often does. It just takes people a while to see it sometimes.’
‘So you agree with Noah then?’ I ask, equally triumphant. ‘Everything happens for a reason?’
‘Never said I didn’t agree with him, did I?’
‘Yes, you did, you said he was spouting bumper sticker nonsense.’
‘I was just testing you, that’s all. I just wanted you to justify what he said and you did.’
I shake my head. ‘You can be so infuriating sometimes!’
‘But loveable too?’ Malachi pouts.
‘Occasionally…’ I say begrudgingly. ‘I should have known you’d be into that sort of stuff anyway.’
‘What sort of stuff?’
‘You know – alternative healing, spiritual stuff.’
‘And why would you think that?’ Malachi asks, his eyebrows rising.
‘Things you say.’
‘Like?’
‘Right, stop asking me for proof all the time. I’m not a prosecuting attorney.’
Malachi grins. ‘Sorry. Yeah, I am quite open to all that sort of thing as it goes.’
‘Good.’ I look down into my almost empty coffee cup.
‘What’s up, Ana? There’s obviously something bothering you. Let me guess, it’s something you can’t explain, right?’
I nod. I had to talk to someone about it and Malachi was the only person I could think of who might understand.
‘Is it something spiritual?’
‘No,’ I snap. ‘Why would you say that?’
‘What you were saying before, that’s all. No need to bite my head off.’
‘Sorry. Like I said, Daisy was into all that kind of thing. It was one of the few things we disagreed on.’
‘I see. So is that what’s bothering you – something to do with Daisy?’
I glance up at Malachi, still wondering if I should share this with him. He does seem genuinely interested and eager to help.
‘It’s going to sound silly if I tell you.’
‘Why don’t you try, and I’ll decide that.’
‘Okay…’ I take a deep breath. ‘So since I’ve been here in St Felix there have been… well, how can I put it… there have been these signs.’
&n
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