by Risqué
Slowly he stroked Drae, her soft and wet walls sending chills up his spine. His firm ass tightened with every stroke as he kissed her all over her face. “Don’t let another niggah snag you. Gimme a chance first.”
Drae opened her eyes and looked into his. “I’m not looking for nobody else. I’m just looking for me.” She cupped his ass as he pounded his hard dick in and out of her.
“Don’t forget me.” He drove his dick in as deep as it would go.
She arched her back, “I won’t ever forget you.” She stopped talking long enough to moan, “But I’m not going away right now. I just know I can’t keep staying in your house like this. I have some things I need to deal with.”
“I’ma miss waking up next to you.” His nut freed itself into her warm flesh.
“Me too,” she panted as she came. “Oh God, me too.”
Yuri
For most of the ride they were quiet. Yuri rolled down the window, leaned back and closed her eyes. The wind blew into her face and through her hair. She knew things had started to change since she first moved in. And maybe she noticed it when she cussed out the woman on the phone who turned out to be his business associate, or maybe it was when he asked if she had been going through his things and she lied and told him no. Or it could’ve been when she started thinking he was fucking all the girls in his videos. Or maybe he was simply tired of her and that’s why he stopped coming home some nights. Hell, there had to be a reason, especially since, when she first moved in, it was all a dream come true. He was Cock Diesel and she was the new millennium version of June Cleaver. Although she worked, she always made sure the place was clean and there was food to eat. They talked until the wee hours of the morning, played Monopoly and Uno every other night, watched TV, sang, wrote songs together and made love everywhere…for however long they wanted, without worrying about the time or her needing to make up a lie because she’d stayed too long. It was exactly what she needed, and even when Jeff served her with legal-separation papers three weeks after she’d left, she didn’t think twice about the choice she’d made. Her only regret was not leaving Jeff sooner.
“You got a problem with me going to the studio tonight?” Britt looked at her out the corner of his eye as he drove her to Nae-Nae’s for his Vote for Sanjaya American Idol party.
“I got a problem with you going every night.”
“I’m making a CD, Yuri.”
“Cool. Hope you’re making hits.”
“You trying to be funny?”
“Do I look like I wanna laugh?” She faced him.
“You love me, don’t you?”
“Not this time, Britt. I’m really not in the mood for that shit.”
“A’ight, Yuri.”
“Yeah, a’ight.” Yuri was doing her all to keep her emotions in check, but she wanted to scream at him about why Troi was calling the loft, and why he was going in the other room every time his phone rang. And that she was tired of his being at the studio all night, coming home, gettin’ some pussy and then falling asleep. No “Hey how are you,” “I missed you,” “How was your day,” nothing. Just a nightly fuckin’ nut that he acted like he’d been dying all day to lay.
As they pulled in front of Nae-Nae’s, Yuri gave him a quick peck on the lips. “Pick me up by twelve o’clock.”
“Yes, baby.” He leaned over and opened her door.
She closed the door and watched him take off.
As Yuri crossed the street she noticed Drae’s car was parked. Near Nae-Nae’s stoop she saw a caramel-colored woman sporting larger-than-life white hoop earrings, who looked to be at least seven months pregnant, with a blond clip weave, belly shirt and a fitted denim skirt tucked underneath her stomach. Alongside her was a small boy, who looked no older than eleven. Yuri tried not to laugh, but for the life of her she couldn’t understand why this kid was dressed like a Guardian Angel, with a red tam cocked to the side and a black karate suit on. Once she got a little closer she could swear that they looked familiar, yet she couldn’t place them.
“Good evening,” Yuri said as she stepped on the porch.
“I don’t know who the fuck told you it was a good evening,” the pregnant woman snapped. “Somebody better tell her.”
“If she don’t know,” the kid said as he sucked his teeth and leaned to the side, “she better get the video.”
“For real, though.” The pregnant woman chuckled snidely as they exchanged high-fives. “She over here eye-fuckin’ me and shit. Hmph niggahs is got Freeda Foreman fucked up.”
“Straight hatin’,” the kid added.
“What are you talking about, eye-fuckin’ you?” Yuri said in disbelief. “I was just looking at how cute your kid was.”
“Kid?” He turned around, and that’s when Yuri realized exactly who it was. “I’m not no motherfuckin’ kid, bitch. Oh, you got Squeak fucked all the way up.”
Squeak and fuckin’ Freeda from IHOP, Yuri thought. What the hell are they doing here?!
“Oh no she didn’t, Squeak!” Freeda screamed.
“Yes she did.”
“Oh hell no…she didn’t. She ain’t called you no kid, Squeak. Don’t give it to her, Squeak. Don’t even sweat that shit. She don’t know ’bout you. Plus the twins is right here.” She pointed to her belly.
“You right.” His chest heaved up and down. “You right, and you know Squeak luv da kids.”
“Excuse you?” Yuri said, finally coming out of the shock that they were actually here and talking about her. “Why are you even here? Didn’t they lock the space monkeys up?”
“Space monkeys?”
“I ain’t stutter,” Yuri said, and turned to the side as if she were speaking to an invisible person. “Did I stutter? No, you ain’t stutter. Didn’t think so. Now if you got something you wanna say to me, then say the shit.” She turned back to face them.
“Girl, please.” Squeak looked Yuri up and down. “You don’t want none of this.”
“Whatever.” Yuri pressed relentlessly on Nae-Nae’s bell. “Nae-Nae better come on.” Yuri said to herself, but loud enough for them to hear.
“Nae-Nae?” Freeda and Squeak said simultaneously.
Freeda turned to Yuri. “Nae-Nae fucking with you too, and here I thought you and that other girl was les’bens.”
“Les’bens?”
“Now she don’t know what a les’ben is, Squeak. It’s a dyke!”
“Booyah!” Squeak jumped at Yuri.
“But I tell you what, Squeak, I know for sure I’ma floor his ass. That fairy niggah will never be the same. You know he playin’ you, right?” She turned to Yuri.
“Playin’ who?”
“Oh,” Freeda laughed, “this ho must think she special. She really don’t know do she, Squeak?”
“You smell that?” He sniffed.
“Smell what?”
“A dumb ho in the air.”
“Okay, you know what, I’m not gon’ stand here and y’all comin’ at me crazy.” Instead of pressing on Nae-Nae’s bell, Yuri pounded on the door. “Where is this niggah at?! Been done fucked around and have me put you over my knee lil’ man-child, and whip…yo’…motherfuckin’ ass!”
“Man-child?”
“Hold your horses!” Nae-Nae screamed as he approached the door. “That is, unless you came ridin’ in on one.” Nae-Nae opened the door, wearing a pair of super-tight flame shorts and a Vote for Sanjaya tee shirt with the front twisted into a knot, showcasing the sunburst tattoo around his navel.
“Where the fuck have you been?!” Yuri screamed, barging past him. “I been banging on this motherfuckin’ door out here with these two goddamn special-ed clowns and shit!”
“Yuri, calm down,” Drae said as she and Raphael rose from the couch to see what was going on.
“I’ma see you, bitch.” Squeak kicked his feet at Yuri and lost his balance, slipping onto his ass. “Special-ed my ass! We got feelings too!” he said as if he wanted to cry.
“Get up, Squeak.” Freeda exte
nded her hand. “You know you slue-footed.”
“I swear to God!” Squeak went off. “I’ma see yo’ gigantic rotten ass again! You big bitch. I should get up from here and work yo’ ass over!” He rose from the floor.
“Calm down, this ain’t about you, Squeak. You can handle that tee-pee-lookin’ bitch later. Lookin’ like her name Eagle Ass! Now, Nae-Nae!” Freeda screamed. “Where you been, Nae-Nae?!”
“Why is yo’ fishy ass worried about where Nae-Nae been?” Raphael, who was wearing tiger shorts, patent-leather combat boots, and the knot in his Vote for Sanjaya tee shirt twisted midway up his back, smacked his lips. “Where did she come from, Nae-Nae?”
“That’s what the fuck I wanna know,” Yuri snapped.
“What is going on here?” Drae asked. “What are they”—she waved her index finger—“doing outside of IHOP?”
“I’m his woman.” Freeda pointed to Nae-Nae. “He came back and kicked it to me that day and we been on ever since. Tell ’em, Squeak.”
“Not right now, Freeda,” Squeak said. “’Cause I really didn’t appreciate that special-ed shit.”
For a split second the entire room became silent and then everyone except Freeda and Squeak burst into laughter.
“His woman!” Drae laughed. “Birdman got a better chance of havin’ a woman.”
“Told you they were special ed. Dumb motherfuckers!” Yuri screamed. “I know this ho lyin’ on Nae-Nae. You know damn well ain’t no straight niggah rockin’ all that patent leather.”
“Tell them I’m your woman, Nae-Nae,” Freeda said, sounding as if she wanted to cry.
“I ain’t telling ’em shit. I’m Bishop Don Nae-Nae and these is my bitches!” He pointed to Yuri and Drae.
“I told you we was gon’ have to kick his ass!” Squeak said to Freeda.
“I got this, Nae-Nae,” Yuri spat. “I been wantin’ to get at this sawed-off Chia Pet–lookin’ motherfucker since I stepped in here.”
“Chi-chi-chi-chia.” Drae laughed.
“Both y’all stupid,” Yuri carried on. “This niggah ain’t never seen no goddamn pussy, let alone nut up in one. You lyin’-ass skeezin’, Rainbow Shop–wearin’ bitch!”
“Low IQ-havin’ ho!” Drae added.
“Who you talkin’ to?” Freeda turned on Drae. “Go suck a dick, you porn-star freak! What is yo’ name, Moon…Star…Oh I forgot, it’s Sunshine!”
“What—”
Before Drae could go on, Freeda snapped, “See, I shut yo’ ass up! Now, who else want some?”
“Let me break it down for you, hood-ho. Don’t you ever step up in this motherfucker”—Raphael threw his hips to one side—“thinkin’ you ’bout to bring it, ’cause I will take off this motherfuckin’ midriff and show all y’all niggahs the hair on my chest. Now, how you need to leave, on your own or my foot got to do it?!”
“You gon’ let them talk to me like this, Nathan? You ain’t talk to me like this when you was strokin’ me and telling me I look like a queen.”
“Now I know you lyin’,” Raphael said, “’cause this niggah don’t stroke, he on the bottom, bitch.”
“T.M.I. Raphael, please,” Yuri said before she resumed cussin’ Freeda and Squeak out. “You look like a queen, yeah, right,” Yuri screamed. “What you look like is Shrek the drag queen. I don’t know what’s on your lil’-ass mind, but this niggah don’t have no motherfuckin’ money, so why would you be tryna put them kids on him?”
“These is Nae-Nae’s kids!” Freeda screamed. “Tell ’em, Nae-Nae.”
“I swear on the Rainbow God,” Nae-Nae said. “Billie Jean is not my lover.”
“Now look, Freeda,” Squeak added, “he don’t even know yo’ name.”
“But he the twins’ daddy, Squeak!” Freeda screamed. “Nae-Nae know these kids is his!”
Everybody fell out laughing again. “If you don’t get yo’ Work-First ass outta here—” Yuri snapped.
“You telling her my business, Nae-Nae?! And I believed you when you said I looked like a queen.”
“Freeda,” Squeak called.
“A queen, Nae-Nae!”
“Freeda!”
“You know he said it, Squeak. You know he did.”
“Come on, Freeda,” Squeak said. “Get it together.”
“But, Squeak.”
“Don’t cry, Freeda. You know I can’t get high enough to wipe your tears. Told you we shoulda waited for The Maury Povich Show. I betchu he’ll make this fairy-flamin’-pussyactin’-small-dick-ass-freak tell the truth. He wanna act funny, walkin’ around in flamin’ drawls lookin’ like a shitty-ass skid mark with a Vote for Sanjaya tee shirt on, and everybody know overgrown ass Jordin gon’ win. Come on, Freeda, ’fore we have to slice these niggahs up.”
“I’ma see you again, Nae-Nae,” Freeda cried. “That’s exactly why I bust out all yo’ windows and sliced yo’ tires.”
“And that’s why I had my crew jump yo’ ass!” Squeak spat at Raphael.
“They had me jumped?!” Raphael screamed in disbelief.
“I promise, you will see me again.” And she and Squeak walked backward out the door, Squeak hunching his shoulders at Yuri.
Once they crossed the threshold, Squeak pointed from his eyes to Yuri’s, “I’m comin’ for your throat, bitch.”
“Call me when you jump that high.” Yuri slammed the door in their faces.
“Oh Jesus.” Raphael flopped down on the couch, as if he were due to faint. “Nae-Nae, where did them creatures come from? Who invented them?”
“I don’t know.”
“Nae-Nae,” Yuri said, “if you went back in IHOP and got with that bitch, I’ma beat the gay off yo’ ass!”
“Oh no,” Raphael said as if he’d been defeated. “I don’t even wanna imagine you with no fish. You promised you weren’t gon’ cheat no more, Nathan!”
“That heifer is crazy!” Nae-Nae tried to console Raphael.
“She better be,” Drae said distantly.
“Look,” Yuri said, as she sat down on the couch and kicked her shoes off, “the show is on and before you know, it’s gon’ be time to vote. We all know Nae-Nae don’t even dream about pussy unless it’s in a sex-change operation, so I’m convinced that bitch is crazy, especially since she and Tattoo attacked me and all I said was good evening.”
“That’s right,” Nae-Nae said. “Let’s watch some TV.”
As everyone laughed and agreed with Simon’s comments, Yuri called Britt several times on his cell phone, but he never answered. The last time she called him, she could tell he’d turned it off. And when she called the studio the phone just rang.
“All right now,” Nae-Nae announced. “The phone lines are open and you know our standard: ten votes apiece.”
“I’m gon’ vote for LaKisha and Melinda too, Nae-Nae,” Drae insisted.
“Real class, Drae. You gon’ waste your vote on Big Country and a buck-toothed Bobble Head.”
Drae ignored him and looked at Yuri. “You votin’ already?”
“No.”
“Well, who are you calling, then?” Drae asked.
“Nae-Nae got enough business for us to get into, I don’t need you in mine.”
“Shut up, Eagle Ass, before I get Squeak back in here.” Drae laughed.
“Yeah a’ight, Sunshine.”
“I wonder where they got that from?” Drae said, more to herself.
“They don’t know what they’re talking about!” Yuri closed her phone.
“I hope not, Yuri,” Drae said, unsure.
A few hours passed and everyone voted, ate dinner, drank wine and recapped the evening. Before long it was going on two o’clock in the morning. “Oh damn.” Drae looked at the clock. “I need to get going. I hope they haven’t given my room away. Shit, I hope I didn’t forget to reserve it all week.”
“Where are you staying?” Raphael asked. “You know you don’t have to stay in no hotel. You can stay with me and Nae-Nae. We just like to make love in the kitchen every once
in a while.”
“Here we go with the visuals,” Yuri said. “If it’s all that, Drae, you know you’re welcome to stay with me and Britt. He wouldn’t mind.”
“Listen, thanks, but I’m okay. I’m on a personal vacation right now.” She smiled. “And tomorrow I have a nice surprise planned for a very good friend of mine. So let me go.” She grabbed her purse. “Don’t you have to go to work, Yuri?”
“Yeah…I do…Will you give me a ride home?”
“I thought Britt was coming to get you.”
“He got stuck at the studio,” she lied. “But if you’re not going that way, I could catch a cab.”
“Girl, if you don’t come on here.”
Yuri and Drae grabbed their purses, kissed Nae-Nae and Raphael on their cheeks and left.
When they got in the car and started to drive, Drae asked Yuri, “You heard anything from Jeff?”
“I met him for lunch.”
“Are you crazy?!” Drae turned and quickly looked at her. “Why would you do that?”
“Because we needed to talk. And we needed to talk with all the shit on the table, the truth and nothing but the truth. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I need closure.”
“Closure can be simply not looking back.”
“Not for me,” Yuri said. “Besides, we met at Darlene’s, a lil’ posh place in Manhattan.”
“And?”
“And he told me he was sorry. Sorry about everything: how we didn’t work out, about Jeff Jr. and Kathy, sorry for the way he treated me.”
“And you?”
“I apologized for my part.”
“And that’s it, y’all are good friends now? What kinda ridiculous shit?”
“We didn’t leave friends, Drae. We left satisfied that the shit is finally over. He said he may try with his son’s mother again.”
“And what did you say?”
“I said good luck.”