by J Peach
“Maybe, but he says it’s not—” Kim suddenly broke out laughing, hitting the table. “What?”
“It must be really hard. Yo thunder cat probably lonely as hell, aching and all. Wait, what’s that noise?” Her eyes squinted and her head tilted slightly as if she was listening to something.
I got quiet trying to hear the noise. “Kim, I don’t hear anything. What it sound like?” I asked.
“Do I hear whining?” She leaned toward me.
I pushed her away. “Bitch, fuck you. Get yo ass out my house.” I stared at her as I shook my head, laughing. “She do be purring, though, but thanks to Blake running every man off, I can’t feed her.” Looking at each other, we broke out laughing. “Shut up! That’s not funny. I do need to get some.” It had been a long time since I last had sex. Three years to be exact. But I’d been so busy with raising Blake, work and school, I had no time to play.
“Don’t worry we gon’ find somebody at this party to break you in good. Somebody to have yo ass bowlegged as hell, coochie swollen, walls missing—”
“Girl, shut yo ass up before Blake walk in here. Kim, you stupid. Walls missing really, though?” I laughed at her as we left out of the kitchen going into the living room where Blake laid stretched out on the couch. “Rashad, get yo feet off the couch.”
He sat up straight running a hand over his head then down his face. He seemed so frustrated.
I smiled at my little man and then walked over and sat beside him. “You look just like your dad doing that.” Blake let out a sigh, which I returned. “What is it, Blake?”
“Don’t worry about it. I already know the answer…” he mumbled, leaning back into the couch.
“Hey, Peach, I’m about to go. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay.” Kim grabbed her purse.
Nodding, I got up to walk her to the door. “Okay, I’ll call you.”
“Bye, Blake.” She gave him a hug and kiss him on the cheek before following me out of the living room to the front door. “Alright, Peach, I’ll message the girls and let them know what’s up.”
“Okay, boo, call me when you get in.” With a wave, she walked out of the house to her car.
Once she pulled off, I closed and locked the front door and then went back to Blake.
Blake and I sat on the couch blindly watching the TV. He probably thought I was going to nag him about telling me what’s up, but he was going to break first. I knew my son all too well. Once I opened the door for him to ask his question, he knew it was a possibility of me saying yes so he was going to crack.
Glancing at me, he quickly looked away.
“Alright, night, sweetie. I’m tired, so I’m going to bed.” That did it and he let out an even bigger sigh.
“Okay, Eric’s birthday is this weekend and they’re going to Great America on Saturday. I know I’m grounded, but can I please go? His mom got extra tickets for the party so you don’t even have to pay,” he pleaded.
To send Blake off with someone was a no go. He didn’t leave my sight if he didn’t have school or I didn’t have to work unless he was with his dad or nana. So Blake going to Great America, which was two and half hours away from me, was a no.
“You’ll have to ask your daddy because you’re with him on Saturdays,” I told him, making a mental note to call Blaze.
“I know. I want all of us to go. We ain’t did nothing together in a long time and since you don’t have to work Saturday and I’m with my dad we can all go,” he informed me with a serious face.
My lips turned up already knowing what he was doing. “Don’t try to use a family day just so you can go to Eric’s party and don’t be puffing up either—”
“I’m not using a family day to go to the party. We just don’t do nothing no more,” he started with an attitude.
My mouth popped open at his lie. “Blake, we don’t do anything? Seriously? When I’m off and you get out of school, we’re always doing something.” I stared at him in disbelief not believing he was saying that.
“I mean us. Me, you and dad. We don’t do nothing anymore like we used to. Y’all don’t even talk like that unless I do something or I call him. Other than that, y’all don’t talk. Just forget it, I’m going to bed.” He got up off of the couch and stormed out of the living room. Blake stomped up all thirteen stairs until his door was slammed shut.
Groaning, I got up and went after him. I didn’t know what to say to him. What reason did we have for not talking as much as we used too? We really didn’t aside from the distance, my schooling and my work schedule. Those were the only reasons why we stopped doing so much together.
I pushed his room door open and leaned against the frame. I watched as he played Call of Duty. I knocked on the wall to get his attention but he didn’t even glance up.
“Babe, you’re right. We don’t do things as a family like we used too and I’m sorry for that. Blake, this shouldn’t be an excuse but with me having to go to work and school, it was sometimes hard. I was honestly tired with doing everything all at once. Babe, even though we may have stopped doing things together, don’t make us any less of a family. Baby, you know that. We’re always going to be a family regardless of how much time we spend together.” Rubbing the top of his head, he paused his game.
“You don’t have school no more. Can we start doing stuff like we used to, again? It just don’t be the same when we do different stuff. It don’t be all that fun, with just dad and me. We don’t do nothing but play basketball, go shopping or stay at nana’s house. We don’t go to the park, carnivals none of the fun stuff, but when we all used to get together we did, but now…” Frustrated, his hand went over his head and then down his face.
“Baby, where is all this suddenly coming from?” Blake had never been a complaining or an I want kid. He was always so Blaze like. Nonchalant about everything with nothing hardly ever bothering him. He always went along with whatever and with no complaints. So for this to suddenly be coming out his mouth meant something was seriously wrong.
“Just forget it—”
“No, I am not going to forget it. Baby, talk to me.” Sliding off of the bed, I sat on the floor next to him. “Blake, start talking.”
“Eric, his mom and dad always doing stuff together like we used to. When he tell me the fun stuff they’re always doing, it pisses me off because I can’t say what we do. All my friends’ moms and dads do stuff with them except for you two,” he explained with an attitude.
A heavy sigh left my mouth, knowing he was right. “You’re right, we don’t but now that I’m done with school, we can start doing all that again, I promise. I’ll even talk to your dad about Great America and we can stay the whole weekend. Summer break starts Friday, so we’ll stay there from Saturday to Tuesday. How about we do that?” Again he shrugged. “Blake—”
“Do you love my dad?” He suddenly asked me.
His question caught me off guard even so I slowly nodded my head. “Yes, of course, baby. That should never even be a question. Blake, I love your dad, too much, way too much.” I found myself laughing at that. Doing so, made him look at me.
“What’s funny?” His brow furrows with his head tilted sideways. He looked just like his dad.
I shook my head and laughed again as I thought back on how I fell in love with that psychopath. “Have I ever told you how I met your dad?”
Blake head shook at my question. “No, but I asked him and he said you used to stalk him, standing outside his apartment—”
“What!” That lying nigga. “I stalked him? Seriously? Of course he would say that. Your father is a liar. He stalked me, forced his way into my apartment, beat up my then friend and fought my brother, Uncle King. Your dad was crazy. He still is but he was good to me in his own way. I honestly don’t think love could really explain how I feel about him. What we had or have is beyond that four letter word, but it grew even bigger the moment he gave me you.” My smile was wide and my head shook.
“Blake, just because we don’t do family thing
s like we once did, doesn’t change a thing. My love for him, his love me, and our love for you, none of that changes and it never will. So don’t ever question our feelings because we’re not like your friends’ parents. Okay?” My hands rubbed over his wavy hair and I pulled him to me.
“Yeah, you’re right. So dad beat up your boyfriend?” Blake asked, laughing, which I joined in on.
“Yes, he did. Your dad was obsessed with me. I’m not tryna brag but yo momma had it goings on, baby. Had your daddy drooling like a bulldog.”
Blake burst out laughing. “So how y’all meet?”
Before I answered his question, I pulled him off of the floor and walked to his full size bed. I laid against his headboard and patted the spot next to me.
Blake kicked off his house shoes and climbed in the bed next to me. Once he got comfortable, I started rubbing his head, like I’ve done since he came into my life.
“Your dad had just gotten out of jail—”
“Jail?” He cut me off.
Laughing, I nodded. “Yep, he was fresh out. That night, him, Uncle King and Sam came to the club where your aunties and I were at…”
Chapter 3
Peaches
I sat at the restaurant with my girls, not paying attention to what they were saying as I picking at my food. I couldn’t let go of the fact that Blaze told me to invite whoever I wanted to his party. It was really bothering me. I needed to talk to my girls.
A heavy sigh slipped through my lips and I looked up at my girls. “Y’all, B, told me I could bring somebody to his party.” They all stop mid bite or drink to look at me.
“Like a date, with another man?” Angel asked, dumbly.
My head nodded. “Yep.”
Missy snapped her fingers then waved a hand at me while she swallowed her food. “Nuh uh, don’t do it, Peach. That’s a setup. He’s just trying to see if you slickly giving his wet, wet away.”
Looking at Missy, I started laughing. “Miss, seriously? You so damn stupid.”
“Bitch, I’m serious. Niggas slick like that.” She pointed at me. “Watch, once you walk in there with a man, Blaze crazy ass gon’ knock him the fuck out.”
“Missy, shut the fuck up, with yo silly ass.” After a few chuckles, I became serious. “No, for real, I don’t think he was playing. Blaze said he didn’t want me to feel left out or alone because he’s bringing somebody with him.” That got Ebony’s attention and her eyes quickly snapped to mine.
“Is it serious?” she asked.
Humming, I shrugged. “He says it’s not, but you know B. He’ll tell me anything to make sure I’m not uncomfortable. Even if that’s the case, it’s his business—”
“Bitch, shut the fuck with yo dumb ass. Now you know if you see him walk in that thang with a sexy chick on his arm, you gon’ be feeling a certain type of way. Be it jealousy, insecurity or self-consciousness and don’t talk about if the bitch pretty.” Angel chimed in, making me groan.
I couldn’t lie to my bitches no matter what, I just couldn’t. “Ang, I know! Y’all know we used to hook up after his party so for him to tell me he gon’ have a bitch on his arm.” I paused for a second. “Ugh, this is kinda bothering me. Man, I don’t know. I mean for B to tell me he’s bringing a chick makes me think it may be serious, like he’s actually feeling this girl.”
“Peaches, I get it trust me but you done cut that man off, you hardly ever see him. What you expect him to do? Wait for you when you had already stop giving him play? Babe, you have a habit of cutting a nigga off without any explanation. You just slowly let him fade off. That’s exactly what you did to Blaze. Weekends was y’all thing, which you suddenly stopped. You had just started dropping little man off to him and it’s been like that ever since.” Kim saying that brought me back to my conversation with Blake last night.
It was true I had done just that, but with everything I was doing on top of driving back and forth from Gary to Lafayette and messing around with Blaze on top of our family outings became tiring.
That one weekend, three years ago, was only supposed to be just that, a onetime thing. I had slept fourteen hours straight into the next morning. And after that, I knew I really needed those two days for myself. My body was so over worked.
But now that I was through with school I was going to start back setting up our family weekends like we used to have.
“I know. Rashad brought that up last night. I feel like shit now. It wasn’t supposed to last this long, y’all know that. I was doing entirely too much. So by the time I had that one weekend to myself, it was like a breaking point. At that point, I really needed that time. Now I feel so bad. My baby actually asked me did I love his dad after he finished comparing us to his friends’ parents. My body was just freakin’ tired.” I explained this to them and they nodded their understanding.
“Did you ever explain this to either one of them?” Ebony questioned.
My mouth opened but closed before I could reply because I hadn’t.
“Exactly, how was they to know what you were feeling if you weren’t talking to them? Yeah, you talk to us, but you’re not fuckin’ neither of us nor do you have a kid with us that you’re taking care of. Little man is a smart dude. I’m sure he would’ve understood. B? Umm, I can’t speak on his persistent ass, but Rashad he would’ve got it with his little grown ass.” A glare soon covered Ebony’s face as she said that, pointing her fork at me with slanted eyes as she shook her head.
“What?” Angel, Missy, Kimmy and I chimed in unison. Looking at each other, we laughed.
“Fo’real, E, what’s the look for?” I didn’t like that look on her face. He had to have done something.
Her eyes rolled into her head before she shook it. “That little boy of yours. Girl, I almost whooped his ass the other day.”
That got my full attention. “For what?” Not knowing what he could’ve done to make Ebony want to whoop him. Blake loved his aunties to death and would never do anything to make them mad.
“Girl, the other day when I dropped Keema off to King’s, Blake was with him. So he asked me to drop him off at Mom B’s house. Fine, cool. We caught a flat so I had to pull over. Just so happens, Shawn was passing by in his pick-up and came to help change my tire. Once he finished, we stood there talking, you know, catching up or whatnot. Tell me why Blake’s little grown ass gets out the fuckin’ car, came on our side and then looked at the changed tire. From there, he glanced at Shawn, then to me and back at the tire. After checking everything out, he gon’ say, Why the fuck you standin’ here conversing with this mothafucka. He done his damn job. Pay his ass and let’s go.”
My eyes were wide as was my mouth.
“Yep, that was my exact reaction. Then he looked back at Shawn and said, Yo ass out here smiling hard as fuck. Nigga, make me call my Unc out here. He gon’ fuck yo ass up. Now gon’ get the fuck outda here. Peach, I was so fuckin’ embarrassed. Then to emphasize that shit, he pulled out his cellphone and started calling King’s ass. He put the phone on speaker and everything. I hurried up and dropped his ass off to Bianca’s. I was so pissed that he did that. You know I ain’t fuck’d with King’s ass since I had Keema.” Ebony stressed.
The mention of my five year old niece made me smile as what Blake did seemed to fade.
It was true. Ebony stopped messing around with King five years ago. She was serious about being done with him until one drunken night and she slipped up, which resulted in her fourth pregnancy. But unlike the other times, she wasn’t with King to stress over him and ended up having a healthy, beautiful baby girl.
“I’mma whoop his ass fo’real, now. This shit is getting ridiculous with him. But for Blake to do you like that is not acceptable.” Shaking my head, I looked at her but she ended up laughing, which had us joining in. “That’s not funny. That shit is embarrassing as hell.”
Ebony nodded while laughing. “Bitch, I know. Shawn called me later that day asking was my guard gone. He actually found Blake’s reaction funny. He said,
He was just looking out for his auntie. That’s what a little man supposed to do, but he need his mouth washed out with a gallon of soap.”
That had my brows raising. Since Shawn helped get my mom’s car fixed for her so many years ago, they clicked. But it never went anywhere especially not with King’s ass around.
“So my son actually snagged you a guy?” I teased, laughing.
Ebony rolled her eyes as she forked her food. Her cheeks slowly started to turn red.
“This bitch is not getting red in the face?” Kim said, nudging Ebony.
“Y’all she is. So what the dick was like?” We burst out laughing at Missy’s question.
“Bitch, we didn’t…”
“Oh, my damn. You hoe! You fuck’d him?” Angel asked loudly, drawing attention to us. Ebony turned redder.
“Wow, E. Well, how was it? Did he blow yo back out? Did he have you crying? He wasn’t like a minute pumper, was he? He probably tore that shit up. Did—” Missy babbled.
“Missy, shut the fuck up and let her get a word out damn.” Laughing at her, she stuck her middle finger up at me.
“Y’all childish. Now, E, what happened?” Kim asked.
“Nothing. I mean, we started to but then King called for me to come get Keema. I don’t know what happened but he was pissed, so we had to stop.” Ebony shrugged as if it was nothing.
That didn’t make sense. If something happened when King had Keema, he would have called Blaze to take care of whatever it was. Or he’d drop Keema off to Bianca’s.
“Did he say what happened?” I asked her.
She shook her head not looking up at us. The girls and I looked at each other before staring back at Ebony who still hadn’t looked at us.
“E?” I called her name.
Glancing up, her eyes quickly dropped back down to her food.
Again, the girls and I shared a look before we broke out laughing.
“You hoe! Fo’real, E? Damn,” I said, laughing. “That’s why King’s ass was pissed. He swooped up on yo ass and saw that nigga car parked out front.”