by Mia Madison
I slipped back inside my office and then sent Pam a note that I needed to see Addilyn when she was available. Fifteen minutes later, there was a knock on my door.
“Come,” I called out, and then felt the tension drain away from my shoulders when I saw that it was indeed Addilyn. She closed the door behind her as she always did and started the walk across my office to me, her smile growing more radiant with every step. She was gorgeous today. The sun that filtered through my office windows made her golden hair glow like a halo around her head, and the way she looked in her turquoise pencil dress could have landed her a modeling job with any agency in the city. I loved her, and I had to grip the arm rests of my chair tighter to keep myself from reaching out for her as she neared.
“Hey, you,” she said as she rounded the corner of my desk, her voice a caress to all my senses.
“You’re fired.” I croaked out the words, and if I had not known that it was me speaking, I would not have recognized my own voice.
Addilyn stumbled to a halt, catching her balance with a steadying hand on my desk. “What?” Her eyes were full of disbelief.
“You’re fired, Addilyn.” I kept my voice flat without any inflection even though I felt as though I were ripping my heart out.
“Why?” Indignance crept into her voice. “On what grounds? I haven’t done anything wrong.”
She was right. She hadn’t done anything wrong, and she could sue me for wrongful termination since we’d been having an affair.
“I can’t do this to you anymore.” It was a lie. What I should have been saying was that I couldn’t do this to me anymore. “You have talents other people don’t have, Addilyn, and I won’t let you throw them away by using them here anymore.”
She gaped at me. “You mean such as by finding millions of unrecorded dollars? That kind of ‘throw them away’?”
“Have you ever once in your life thought, ‘Wow, I’d love to be a glorified accountant’? Have you, even once?” I challenged her.
Her face flushed with color, and she seemed to have to search for a return argument, but finally, she found one. “So? That doesn’t mean I’m throwing my talents away. I’m using them. I’m helping to secure the health of your company which in turns secures your ability to offer long term employment for everyone who works for you. You told me that yourself!”
I shook my head and waved my hand as if I could brush away what she’d said. “None of that matters, not for you. Working here isn’t what you want to do with your life, and I’m the only thing that’s keeping you from moving on. What about NASA? Did you apply to their engineering program yet?”
She tried to buoy her confidence by cocking out her hip and propping her hand on it with her elbow jutting out. “It’s none of your business,” she answered simply yet defiantly. “What I do with my life is up to me. Not you! Not you, not my fathers, not anybody. It’s my decision!”
“Well given that I made you come like a banshee three times last night and that I love you, I’m making it my business,” I spat out. “This is over! You are no longer an employee of Select Holdings. Your employment is being terminated immediately.” My words faltered at the end as my brain scrambled to keep up with what I was saying, and I quickly added, “with three months’ severance pay.” Whatever she decided to do, that would give her some time to be able to land on her feet.
I thought she would rage at me. I thought that she would threaten and maybe even storm out, but instead her luscious lips pouted as her large eyes pinched in worry. She played with her fingertips, showing her uncertainty, before asking, “Does this mean that we’re done?”
Lunging forward, I hooked her around the hips and pulled her into my lap, kissing her temple and then her lips. “God, I hope not, but that’s really up to you. Are you done with me? I’m crazy about you, and while I don’t want to get in the way of the rest of your life, I hope that maybe there’s a little room for me to be a part of it.”
She brushed her fingers through my hair, seeming to study my face. “I think I could keep you around for a little while longer,” she said, one corner of her lips teasing up in the beginnings of a smile. “I mean, you did make me come like a banshee...”
Her smile grew and my heart lifted, happy to get to see at least one more day with the woman who had stolen my heart.
Chapter Fifteen
Addilyn
I shook out my hands at my hips, trying to release of my pent-up anxiety as I stood outside the front door of my parent’s country home about an hour outside of New York. We used to have a family dinner every month, but I hadn’t been home in almost half a year. But when Mama called me up and told me in no uncertain terms that it was time for me to put my feud with Daddy aside, I promised that I would come for a family dinner to do my best to find a common ground on which we could get along.
Finally, taking a deep breath and then blowing it out, I tapped on the door before letting myself in. I’d timed my arrival a mere fifteen minutes before I’d estimated that dinner would be ready, and the mouthwatering aroma of Mama’s famous meatloaf washed over me with hints of what I knew to be creamy mashed potatoes and caramelized onion and apple chutney. My stomach growled traitorously as if to complain about my long absence away from my mother’s cooking.
“Hi!” I called out as I hung up my jacket in the foyer before finding my way to the kitchen. “I’m home!”
“Just in time,” my Mama exclaimed as I stepped into the kitchen. “Give the potatoes a stir and then set the table.” She gave me a kiss on the cheek on her way past to the refrigerator to get out a pitcher of what I knew would be freshly squeezed pomegranate lemonade.
I set to work assisting my Mama in all the ways that she directed, thankful to have something to do that did not include talking about myself. Mama was the pilot of our family, making sure that we continued to move forward as a cohesive unit. Daddy was the navigator, always telling me where I should be going. I could handle Mama’s drive to get us from point A to point B, but Daddy’s presumptive oversight was a bit much for me. I knew that he thought that what he wanted for me was what was best for me, but sometime after the doctor handed me over into his arms and announced that I was a girl, he got it in his head that it was up to him to direct me through every momentous event of my life. But I was done taking a back seat. I’d taken over the navigation duties for my life a long time ago. He just hadn’t accepted that.
Finally, with the table set and the last platter of food put in place, there was no more avoiding it. I sat down at the dinner table with both my parents, hoping against hope that their attention would be directed someplace other than me, but that prayer was soon dashed.
“Sweetheart,” my Mama said as she ladled out a hearty portion of potatoes on my plate. “Tell us what you’ve been up to.”
She passed my plate back to me, looking at me expectantly to say something, just as if she were passing a talking stick like they do at camp.
“You still working as a secretary at that investment firm?”
Oh God. There’s be no easing into it. “No, actually, I left that job about a week ago.” Daddy sneered an ugly smile and hmphed, as if me no longer being at that job held a complete lack of surprise for him. His response, like always, ticked me off so bad that I could barely see straight. “I’m going to be working for NASA instead.” I dropped the announcement like a bomb and then sat back to watch the impact.
“Sure, you are,” my father said before taking a big bite of meatloaf and potatoes, clearly not believing me at all.
“What are you talking about, sweetheart,” Mama—God bless her—asked while giving me her full attention.
“I applied for a program with strong affiliate ties to NASA. I’ll have clearance to work at NASA, but most of the research that I’ll be involved in is done at a research facility about an hour southwest of NYC. My clearance evaluation will take maybe another month, but I should be able to start work as soon as it gets finalized.” I held my chin high as I deliver
ed this news, because every single word of it was true. I’d gotten the offer of employment two days after Harris had fired me, and I hadn’t come down from cloud nine since.
Daddy put down his fork. “You’re going to work for NASA?” he exclaimed, his eyes large. When I nodded my head, his gaze assessed me up and down. “I knew you were a kid with a little bit of extra smarts, but... NASA?” It was as if he couldn’t believe his own ears.
“NASA, Daddy. I’m going to be putting that mathematical engineering degree that you thought was a waste of time and money to good use.” My tone was prickly, and I was ready to throw down in an all-out fight if he had anything snarky to say.
“Honey, you’ve made me proud.” He said the words looking right at me. There was no condescension, no judgment, just acceptance and praise.
My eyes instantly burned. Don’t cry! Don’t cry! I willed my eyes to obey. “Thanks, Daddy,” I mumbled down into my plate of food while doing my best to keep my voice from trembling.
“Now, tell me who you’re dating nowadays,” he asked, and like with the snap of a rubber band, I was back in the place that I was used to being with him—in fight mode. “ ‘Because you better not let your sweetheart years pass you by with your nose stuck in a book or a beaker tube. In fact, I’ve got the perfect guy for you.”
“I’m seeing someone.” Boom! I lobbed the words across the table.
“Who?” he lobbed one right back.
“A great guy,” I said, my eyes narrowing, daring him to try to poke holes in my declaration.
“Great guy-what? I want to know something about this guy. Who does he think he is? What’s he about? You’re my only daughter, and these things matter.”
“He’s a great guy,” I said again, leveling my voice to let it be known that there’d be no more digging on the subject. “I’ll tell you more about him when I think that there’s something to tell. Until then, he’s a great guy”—a paused, then softened my voice—“and maybe you’ll get to meet him, if you’re lucky.” I couldn’t keep the smile that took over my face at my thought of him.
“Ohhhhh...” Mama teased. “Somebody’s got a boyfriend.”
“Mama...” I complained in that age-old way that teenagers do even though I’d left those years behind me, even so I could feel my smile just getting bigger and bigger. Harris had said he loved me. We hadn’t had a boyfriend-girlfriend, exclusive-not exclusive conversation, but I was pretty sure that he was my boyfriend nonetheless.
Chapter Sixteen
Harris
I was taking so much time putting on and adjusting my cufflinks that the fact that I was stalling became undeniably glaring within my own mind. I’d soon be picking Addilyn up to go to dinner—our first date since I fired her—and she was going to end things. I could feel it in my bones and the truth vibrated through my entire body. It felt like walking over a live furnace knowing that at any moment the flames would flare up and consume me but having to continue walking, continue functioning, anyway as if everything was well with the world.
“You’re being an old fool,” I grumbled to myself as I grabbed my car keys and headed out the door. From the minute our relationship started, I had known it was going to end. In fact, I’d done everything I could to push her away. Me lamenting about the end of something that was doomed from the start was useless. It would rob me of any enjoyment to be found within our last night together, and that was definitely not an outcome I wanted to support.
As prompt as always, Addilyn was waiting for me outside of her apartment building as soon as I arrived. Parking the car, I got out and jogged around to her side to open the passenger-side door for her, giving her a kiss on her sweet, pink lips before she slid in. When I got back in the car, the volume of all that wasn’t being said was quite loud and it seemed we both did our best to fill it with the background noise of idle chat. It was a relief when we reached our destination, the Lafayette with its French cuisine and cozy, intimate atmosphere. The bustle of being seated, looking over the menu and then interacting with the waiter kept us busy and lulled me with a sense that possibly things could be okay between us, but then all of the distractions disappeared leaving only me looking across our small table at the most beautiful woman I’d ever had the pleasure of sharing a portion of my life, and in that moment I was sure. That portion of my life was over.
Addilyn’s large, luminous eyes flick from me to the table and then back to me before she licked her lips and adjusted her position in her seat. I was flattered that she was finding ending things with me so hard. Her lips parted, she sucked in a breath, and I knew that the end had finally arrived. “I have something to tell you.”
“It’s okay.” I did my best to sound okay with the complete and total annihilation of my heart. Here it comes.
“Do you remember when you asked me if I’d applied for the engineering program with NASA?”
Okay... maybe it isn’t coming yet. I did my best not to appear thrown by what to me was an abrupt left turn in our conversation. “Uh, sure. Yes.” I nodded like I wasn’t having any trouble keeping up at all.
“Well, I had, and they want me.... or rather, they’ve got me.” She beamed from ear to ear.
“What?” Her smile faltered. Okay, so maybe this is the talk after all. She’d been hired to work for NASA and now she was moving away. She was a smart enough girl to know better than to tether herself to a long-distance relationship with some old guy she’d had a summer fling with, and this was it. We were done. Yet, through these thoughts, I could see that she was disappointed that I didn’t have more to say to her amazing news than a thoughtless ‘What.’ “ I forced my brain to function even though my heart was bleeding out. “I knew you could do it. You’re brilliant, Addilyn. They are lucky to have you.”
Her smile, now dimmed from its original, found a happy middle ground between glowing and sympathetic. “Harris—“
“You don’t have to say it,” I interrupted, needing to rip the band-aide off. “I totally understand. You have to move on with your life.” I took her hand to hold in mine. “I’m just thankful that I’ve gotten the chance to spend some time with you.”
Her lip quivered as her eyes grew wider and round than I had ever seen them, instantly filling with tears. “You’re breaking up with me?”
“No!” My brain scrambled to find its footing. “I mean yes. I mean no, no... Aren’t you breaking up with me? I was just trying to make things easier.”
She shook her head adamantly. “No, I was about to tell you where I’ll be working. It’s about an hour out of the city. I’m... I’m not going anywhere.” Her hand squeezed mine. “You mean a lot to me and I don’t want to lose you.”
It was my turn to shake my head. “But aren’t we at different places in our lives? I’m finally ready to put someone as first in my life, even above my company. I want to have someone to come home to. I want to settle down. You—you’re still exploring, still figuring things out. I don’t want to—“
“To what, love me?” Her smiled warmed. “It’s too late. You’ve already told me that you love me... right when you fired me.” There was a twinkle of humor in her eyes. “Harris Worthington, you are stuck with me... that is, if you want me.”
The flash of uncertainty that I saw in her expression had me bounding out of my seat and stepping around the table to her. She stood to meet me and I took her face in my hands. “I’m yours,” I whispered. “100%, all of me, I’m yours. I never knew how empty my life had become until there was you, and a future with you is the only one I want.”
“I’ll never be a housewife,” Addilyn warned. “I’ll never be the person who waits patiently at home for you. I’ve got a life to live, goals to pursue, and some day, if I get the chance, I’m going into outer space.”
I kissed her, tasting her for the first time of what I hoped would be the rest of our lives. “I’ll keep the lights on and the bed warm for you, baby. I’ll be right here.”
Her gaze flared with heat. “The bed warm?
”
“We could pick up a pizza, spend the evening in bed...” I kissed her again. “Then for breakfast, I make some of the best damn French toast in town.”
She mock gasped. “Mr. Worthington, are you asking me to spend the night with you?”
“Ms. Clement, I’m asking you to spend all your nights with me.”
Her gaze dropped shyly at first, then she looked up at me with a wanton confidence that made me love her all the more. “Let’s go get that pizza.”
Chapter Seventeen
Addilyn
“SURPRISE!”
A wall of voices knocked me back a step as soon as I opened the door to Harris’s and my apartment home. I gaped in wonder as I looked at the collection of faces. Pam was there with her husband and young son as were my parents and several of my friends from MIT. Decorations blanketed nearly every available surface. An overhead archway had a rocket with a fiery tale headed toward a cascade of stars that I’m sure would glow in the dark if the lights were off. Fairy lights blinked like the far away stars of other solar systems. And, a huge four-tier cake danced with all the elements of the solar system. Underneath the soaring rocket ship on the wall were the words, “bon voyage.”
My eyes scanned the room for the person I wanted to see the most, and then there he was with our new puppy, Pluto, in his arms.
“Did you do all this?” I asked with tears stinging my eyes as I made my way to Harris for a kiss from both him and Pluto. I knew that it was a silly question. Of course, he’d done all of this.
“I had to do something for my special rocket gal!” He put Pluto on the floor and then wrapped me in his warm, strong arms.
“Ohhhhh!” I whimpered, hugging him back as tightly as I could. “I’m going to miss you!” Preparation for my trip to the International Space Station had taken eight, long, very focused months, and I had been eager to leave the entire time. But now that it was time to go, all I wanted to do was stay.