by Brook Greene
Her words bring me up short. “No, I’m not going. I’m just going to send what I’ve made with you.” I turn to take the trays of deviled eggs from the fridge to give to her.
“Oh fuck, bitch, you’re going. You’re not going to let him ruin a family cookout for you.” She comes around the island, taking the trays I’m handing to her and setting them behind her. Turning to me, she rests her hands on her hips, giving me that look.
I shake my head. Her look is not intimidating me at all. “No, I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to go.”
She takes a predatory step toward me, leaning one hand on the island, propping the other back on her hip. “Listen to me, Hollis, you’ve worked your ass off to be in this family, got your dumbass shot to prove you belong. One fight with Roman doesn’t make you any less welcome than he is for being a fucking asshole. So you’re going and we’re going to have a great fucking time. Got it?” Her tone leaves me trying my best to stifle a smile at the love I have for this feisty little blonde hurricane. “Go get your bathing suit.” She turns and busies herself with the two trays of deviled eggs.
“Stay out of those,” I tell her, but it does little good as she’s already shoved two into her mouth.
“I am,” she mumbles with a mouthful, the yellow filling covering her front teeth.
“That’s so gross, Piper.” I take the tray lid from her and move the two trays out of her reach.
She pouts at me. “But those are my favorite.”
“I know they are, but you have to leave some for the rest,” I admonish her as I continue to pack up for the picnic, still not sure if I really want to go or not. I’m not ready to be around Roman. I love him, but I don’t like him all that much at the moment.
I hand her an armful of dishes. “Here, carry these and I’ll get the rest from the fridge.”
She pauses with her hands full. “What the hell did you cook?” She rolls her eyes as I turn to retrieve the rest. “Geez, Hollis.”
“Oh, for God’s sake, Piper, stop bitching and just take them out to the car,” I tell her around the fridge door. “I was upset—,” I stop as I look at all the containers filling our refrigerator, shrugging my shoulders. Some people work out, some people drink, I cook or bake when I’m upset.
Piper comes back in, just as I take out the rest of the trays, sitting them on the counter. She lays her hand on mine. “Babe, it’ll be all right. He’s kicking himself big time for the way he acted.” She holds up her finger between us. “But, make him pay a little while longer. I know he loves you, Hollis, and he wants nothing more than for you to be safe. And when he thinks about what took you away from him possibly coming back into your life, he loses it.” She pulls me into her arms.
I melt into her and the warm comfort I need right now. She rubs my back for a few seconds, then gently pushes me away. “Let’s go get drunk.” She takes the remaining containers off the counter. I grab my bag and reluctantly follow her out of the house and to her SUV.
Chapter Four
Hollis
I walk into the house behind Piper with my hands full and my heart heavy. Being happy, smiling and laughing with my friends isn’t exactly what I feel like doing right now. And being around Roman is definitely not something I want to do at all. But at some point, I’m going to have to face him. We live together, it’s inevitable and necessary, and even though we’d said hurtful things to each other, they were words we didn’t mean. But the issue is still present, and we need to get our thoughts and problems out into the open.
I need for him to understand why I want this so badly, even though I know he thinks I’m betraying everything he and his family have done for me. I’m not, I just have to know for some reason. I need to know who he is and why he and my mother didn’t stay together, or if they ever were.
I stop in my tracks when I see Roman come through the back door into the kitchen, and he stops when he sees me too. We stand there, with everything going on in the house around us, just looking at each other. He has a beer in his hand and the most god-awful T-shirt and swim trunks on. I take a deep breath and cross over to him. “What in the hell are you wearing?” I whisper as I set the eggs and things down on the table. Turning to him, my heart melts when I catch his eyes. I feel myself getting lost in them like I always do when he looks at me. Our interaction has brought the activity going on around us to a standstill, everyone holding their breaths, waiting to see what’s going to happen.
He looks around at everyone, then to me. “We need to talk.” He gently takes my elbow and leads me out of the kitchen. I feel all the eyes of the occupants on us as we leave them without a word.
We walk through the pool area and out of the gate, across the lawn to a small gazebo that sits at the edge of the back yard, clearly out of earshot and eyesight of every one. He allows me to enter first before sitting across from me.
He lowers his big frame to the bench, and sighs as he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, cradling his head in his hands. “Hollis, I’m so fucking sorry for the things I said to you this morning. They were uncalled for and you didn’t deserve them.” He looks up at me with regret dimming the light in his blue eyes. He reaches out and takes my hands, kissing both of them. “I’m so proud of you Hollis, and how you’d turned your life around even before you came back to me. I’ve never told you that, and I’m so sorry. I should be telling you that every day.” He lowers his head again, and I feel his shame. The feeling is very familiar to me, I wore it for years. “And I couldn’t be more proud than when I call you mine.” He kisses my hands again, but this time, he holds them to his lips a little longer.
Hearing him say the words I’ve only wanted to hear from him has my heart bursting. I slide off the bench to my knees in front of him, taking his face in my hands. “Roman, you have always been the one person in this world I never wanted to disappoint.” I lay my forehead against his. “But I did, and I thought I’d lost you forever.” I feel the burn of tears sting my eyes.
He raises his head up suddenly, laying his finger on my lips, then brushes his thumb over my scar. “I was angry with you, but only because you left me. You never really lost me, Hollis. I’ve been with you since I was seventeen.” He pushes his hands under my arms, lifting me up onto his lap. Straddling him, he takes my ass in his big hands, bringing me into his body. He takes my mouth with a passion I’ve only felt with him.
I can feel his cock growing hard under me as he uses his strength to rock me back and forth. My pussy begins to tingle with each pass of my sensitive clit grinding on his steel rod in his thin shorts.
I dig my fingers into his hair as he lowers his lips to the curve of my neck. “Take off your bottoms,” he pants into my skin, his hot breath sending chills down my body, straight to my heated sex. I untangle my fingers from his hair and reach for the bows tied at my hips, pulling the strings to release the knots. I use his shoulders to lift myself slightly up as he reaches between us, tugging away the scrap of fabric.
He lays my bottoms on the bench beside him and reaches back for his tee. Pulling it over his head, I fumble with the knotted strings of his shorts. When the strings are free, he pushes his shorts over his hips, down past his thighs. The anticipation of him has my insides twisted up so tight, I’m afraid if I don’t get him inside me, I’m going to snap.
I run my hands over the dusting of light hair on his tanned, tattooed chest, reveling in the feel of them tickling my palms. He pushes his hand between us. “How wet are you for me?” he whispers into my ear as he drags a finger through my pussy lips. “Ah, very, I see.”
“I’m always wet for you,” I pant out, no longer able to hold back the lust burning me as he uses the pad of his index finger to caress my swollen clit. I dig my nails into the skin of his shoulder, trying to keep myself from crying out and alerting everyone that we’re fucking in the small gazebo.
“That’s it, baby,” he coos, right before he takes his fingers away from me, making me whimper, but I don’t have to
wait long in my hazy lust-filled state. He lifts me, positioning the head of his cock at my entrance. I look down at his blue eyes looking up at me. “I want you to come on my dick, around my cock. I want to feel you come undone.” He shoves up hard into me, and I’m not able to hold back.
“Oh shit, Roman,” I groan, biting my lip. He’s bottomed out, and the glorious pain he brings when he fills me like this sends a shudder through my body.
“Ride me, Hollis.” He takes his hands away from my hips and lays them on the bench at his sides, leaning back against the wall behind him. I look down at our bodies where we’re joined and begin to move, watching him appear then disappear back inside of me. I move slowly, not in a rush to end this. Looking up, I find his eyes hooded with the same lust coursing through my body. His blond hair is messy from where I’d tangled my fingers in it. He pulls his bottom lip through his teeth as his eyes slip shut. His head falls back against the wall and I watch as the muscle ticks in his jaw.
His body is rigid, all his muscles tight with tension. I lift and lower myself again and again, wrangling my pleasure from watching him. I feel the flutter begin low in my belly as I pound myself down on him, the feeling of him stretching me, filling me up to the point I don’t think I can take it, but I do.
My legs begin to quiver under the strain, and finally he breaks, his hands flying to my hips as he stands, our bodies still connected. He turns and lays my back on the bench, his big body still between my legs. He loops his arms under my knees, hooking them at the bend of his elbows. He rests one knee on the bench and keeps the other foot on the floor, his intense eyes on me the whole time. “I can’t take it, I’ve gotta fuck you.” His voice is deep and raspy.
He begins to fuck me, my body surging up every time he drives into me. “Rub your clit. I wanna watch you,” he commands, and without thought, my hand drifts down to my pussy. I find my clit and begin to vigorously make circles with my fingers around the swollen bud, stopping to reach down to feel his cock sliding in and out of me.
“Oh, Roman,” I moan, pressing my eyes closed in ecstasy as my fingers please me while his cock drives into my eager body.
“That’s it, baby, get yourself off.” The sound of our skin slapping together fills the air around us. “Fuck, that’s so sexy.” He cups my breast and pinches my nipple between his fingers before he lowers his head and takes it into his mouth, bathing it with his warm tongue.
I reach out with the other hand, bracing it against the wall above my head to stop my body from sliding any farther up the wooden bench than it already has with his forceful thrusts.
“Oh shit, Roman,” I cry out as the slight flutters from earlier begin to ignite into a full-blown five alarm fire in my body. “I’m—I’m coming,” I whimper as my body begins to jerk, feeling my pussy contract around his big cock. I work my fingers faster on my clit, pulling every ounce of pleasure he’s built up in me out.
“Motherfucker,” he grits out between clenched teeth, and with four more forceful thrusts, I feel him land balls deep in me and his cock twitches as he comes, spilling his warm seed inside of me.
I open my eyes to find his big body hovering over mine, a bead of sweat running down the side of his face. He has his eyes closed as he glides slowly in and out of me, drawing out his orgasm with his strokes. I roll my hips, feeling the head of his cock rub deep.
He stills, fighting to pry his eyes open. He leans in, and when he finds me gazing up at him, he places a soft, loving kiss on my lips. “I love you, Hollis, and I will do anything in this fucking world to make you happy and give you what you want.” I feel my eyes burn with tears. I reach up, laying my hand on the side of his face and he kisses my palm. I close my fingers around his face, holding him. I’d hurt this man so much, more than I will ever be able to make up for, and not even the scar on my face can make what I did right. Not just Roman, but his family, and I see it when I look at them that they’ve forgiven me, but I will never be able to forgive myself for what I’ve taken from them.
The splashing of the pool water and chatter of adults drifting through the summer air surrounds us, bringing us back to the here and now. He smiles down at me, his face still resting in my hand. “We should get back.”
I acknowledge the fact with a nod. He lifts off me, pulling from me, and tucks himself away. I watch the whole time, enraptured by the sight of the man in front of me. “Lift up,” he says with a glint in his eye, holding my bottoms in his hand teasingly.
I lift my ass, letting him position the scrap of fabric where it should be. I watch as he ties the knots at each of my hips with such care and attentiveness. “Too tight?” He stands, smoothing his hands down each of my thighs as he goes. “Your skin’s so smooth.” His eyes feast on me as he stands to his full six-foot three height over me, and I lay like a helpless fool with nothing but lust in my eyes for him.
He offers me his hand to help me up and gently pulls me to my feet. He raises my arms around his neck, then wraps his arms around my waist, bringing my body flush against his. “I hate fighting with you, but fuck me, the make-up sex is worth it.” I agree with a nod and a smile. “I’m so fucking sorry, Hollis,” he says again, and this time, I look up and place my finger on his lips. What he’d said had burned me, but I know the minute he’d said the words, he’d regretted them.
“I understand your fear, but that isn’t who I am now, Roman. I’m better than that, and you make me even better every day I’m with you.”
“I know that’s not who you are now, baby, and—,” he starts, but shakes his head with a pained look on his face. “I had no right to say what I did to you.” He locks his eyes on mine. “I don’t doubt you’re done with that life, or that you’ll fall back into it. It’s the fact that I don’t want that shit around you anymore.”
“You don’t know if that’s the kind of life he’s in.”
~~~~~~
Roman
I look down at my life, the woman I hold in my arms who is everything to me, like the air that I breathe. If I could lock her away from everything I would, just to keep her safe from the demons that lurk in her shadows, waiting for the right time to feed off her.
She’s right, I don’t know if that’s the life that her father lives in, but given what her mother was, it’s not a long shot. I relent. “Okay, I’ll do my best to find him for you, but it’s a shot in the dark. Please, keep your expectations low.” I don’t think I could watch the devastation drag her down into the black hole she fell into after her mother, if what we find of her father isn’t much better.
“I understand what I’ve asked for might be impossible, but if anybody can find him, it’s you, Roman.” Her hot breath ghosts across the skin of my chest.
“Are we good, babe?”
“We’re the best,” she replies, squeezing me a little tighter.
I stand there holding her for a little longer, not wanting to let the moments we’ve shared in this tiny gazebo go. But I know everyone is wondering where we are, and we’re going to have to go back out there sometime. I kiss her again before turning her in my arms and leading her out across the yard to the pool area. She looks up at me, smiling with a slight blush to her cheeks. “They’re all going to know what we’ve been doing.”
I give her shoulder a squeeze. “Yup. Do you care?”
“Nope. It’s nothing they haven’t done before,” she says with a smile, not looking the least bit guilty about what we’d done.
A few eyebrows raise and there are smiles when we rejoin the group, but all know we’ve been making up in the gazebo the best way possible. The flush in Hollis’s cheeks gives us away. “Oh, for fuck’s sake, were you two just fucking in the gazebo?” My sister so eloquently blasts into the air around us. I shake my head at her as I roll my eyes.
Hollis pushes up on her tiptoes to kiss me on the cheek, then separates from my side to join the other women at the small picnic table, plucking up a beer from the ice filled tub sitting beside it before slumping down onto one of the benches
. “Oh, for the love of God, Piper, isn’t it obvious?” Hollis bites back at her before twisting the top off the beer and taking a long drink.
Emily reaches across the table, giving Piper’s arm a slap. Piper’s head snaps around to Emily’s, whose face is twisted in aggravation as she points to Caden and Jackson floating in the pool who are looking at them, all ears. Piper sighs, waving her hand in the air.
Emily does try to keep the language clean, but at some point in time, she’s going to have to realize it’s easier to train the kids what not to say other than trying to stop the adults from saying what they shouldn’t.
I snag a beer for myself, giving Hollis one last look and smile, holding her gaze for just a second longer before Tessa asks her a question, pulling her attention away from me.
I sit and watch her, ignoring the conversations going on around me, thinking about what it is I should do next. By no means did the sex we’d just had fix the things I’d said to her. The only way I can make things right with us again is show her with my actions that I have faith in her that she no longer wants that world, but the one I’ve given her and what we’ve built together.
I know from experience she’ll always carry the demons of her past with her, and I’ll have to help her run from them, help her fight them, not give her a reason to want to go back to them.
Maybe if I show her who he might be, she’ll give up her past for good and we can start our lives together with a clean slate and a clear conscience. I can no longer let my selfishness dictate the decision about this. I have to do this for her, to give her the one and only thing she’s ever asked of me.
Chapter Five
Hollis
I watch him across the pool, sitting with his friend, stealing glances of me as I am of him, and it seems I’ve replaced one drug for another. Both being able to cause my soul just as much damage as the other.