“Do you see your family much?” Seta asked politely.
“Enough,” Ji answered. “Do you have siblings other than Rena?”
Seta nodded. Her jaw tightened as she remembered. “Yes. There were over sixty of us when Rena and I were traded into marriage. There are probably more now. We were born in rank in the forties. This is why we had so little say in what match was made for us. Only the firstborn five get to choose their life partners.”
“Multiple mates are a common occurrence among my species, but rarely does a Siren take more than two. Children born to any family are rare and considered a gift.”
“On my planet, children are a commodity for the wealthy. My father had over fifty mates at last count. It is common practice among the wealthy landowners to bargain for all the eligible females in a family when a betrothal with one is made. My biological mother died during gestation with her eighth child. I never got to know her, but I’m sure she was relieved to be free. I felt like that when I killed mine and Rena’s mate.”
Seta watched Ji’s eyebrow arch, but saw his lips twitching too. His silent disparagement of her story made it impossible for them to be genuinely friendly. She told herself that she shouldn’t care anyway, but obviously she did.
Why else would she be tempted to unleash a hundred angry words just because the too handsome Siren dared to find her violent past with males entertaining?
As much as it annoyed her, she was simply unable to hold back the obvious question.
“You find it amusing that I killed my mate?”
“No. I find my reaction to the information amusing. I find myself hoping that I never do anything to make you that angry with me,” Ji said.
“Well, it wasn’t like we had a mild mating argument. On the day I killed him, our mate had traded the bonding use of both me and Rena to two traders he was trying to charm. We were put with them in separate rooms. When I was free of my user, I walked in to find the one with Rena suffocating her. She was unconscious by the time I located a cooking knife and stabbed him to death. It was so satisfying that I went back to the one in my room and killed him while he slept.”
“And what of your mate?” Ji prompted.
He wanted to hear the rest, needed to hear how Seta had freed herself from such a vile situation. Her head bowed with the memories, but when her gaze returned to him, he saw the male’s death in her eyes.
“Rena revived and stumbled out just as the male responsible for our fate returned. She said I stabbed our mate so long and so often that she got stabbed herself trying to stop me. To this day, I recall few details of those killings, but I have absolutely no regrets for taking their lives. We returned to our father’s house that day, but never said anything other than that our mate had been killed. When another mating arrangement was made that would have separated us, Rena and I left together knowing full well we would never return to our father’s house again. I entered the Peace Alliance cadet academy and have never looked back. You’re the first to hear that part of the story.”
Ji walked to stand over her. He had to be careful. He had to say just the right thing so that Seta would not regret sharing the horrors she had endured. “I honor your courage in changing your life. I respect the steps you took to free you and your sibling from that situation,” he said softly.
Seta nodded to acknowledge the compliment, even while she fought off the calming vibrations emanating from the Siren who faced her. “Thank you.”
“I also wish your mate was still alive so I could kill him myself. I would make it a slow and painful death, one filled with extreme regret for his misdeeds toward you,” Ji whispered. His fierce tone surprised him as much as it did Seta. His fierce urges were more shocking. He thought he’d had his protective urges under better control.
“Kill him again? That is both illogical and a waste of energy. Why would you wish such a thing?” Seta asked.
Ji felt a muscle twitching in his jaw where he clamped it tightly. He would not let loose more foolish words. “Forgive me, Seta. I was having an emotional reaction to your story, one I’m sure many males would have. There is no other acceptable explanation for my last statement.”
Seta snorted. “Indeed, there is not. You did not even know me then.”
Ji swallowed hard and turned away from Seta’s censure before he did something he had promised Synar he would not do. His instinct was to beguile the Ethosian with the Siren’s call and make her his. He definitely needed to have his implant checked.
“I assume you did not seek me out to tell me your life’s story. Was there some other reason you wanted to see me?” Ji asked, forcing his attention to remain on the barren work surface.
Seta nodded, then realized Ji couldn’t see her with his back turned. His braid hung in a long thin strand down his broad back, temporarily mesmerizing her. It would be interesting to lift it and study the colors in the strands. She wondered if he braided it himself or had someone else do it. She wondered if he engaged the help of whatever grateful female had shared his bed for the sleep cycle. His curious gaze swinging back to hers over his shoulder ended her fascination.
“Is there someplace we could talk more privately?” she asked.
Lifting an eyebrow again, Ji stared in wonder. “We are equals in rank now, Seta. I would appreciate it if you would use my name when you address me with questions. Engineering has a standing workroom with counter stools. It is small, but we can be alone there.”
Seta frowned at Ji’s back which was turned away before he’d finished speaking. When he walked off without waiting for her to answer at all, it left her no choice but to follow. Ji Warro’s rank might have changed to one equal to hers, but the arrogance of his previous role remained solidly in place in his manners towards her.
Once inside the tiny room, she watched Ji walk to perch on one of the backless seats, his long legs still touching the floor even as he sat. The energy reading skill she only used for tracking suddenly flared to near panic proportions. The Siren’s natural intensity filled the room and made her wish that she hadn’t closed the door behind her. An image of Ji embracing her suddenly filled her mind. She backed up against the door and crossed her arms. It was ineffective against the invisible demands he was making, but it increased her sense of being able to refuse them.
“Your bonding intentions are not hidden to me. After hearing my story, I’m sure you can understand why I feel no need to subjugate myself to a male again. I haven’t felt a desire for bonding since I was a young female still caught in mating illusion,” Seta said. “Celibacy suits me and I have devoted myself to that lifestyle. Do not ask me to change.”
Ji crossed his arms as well. “Your story is exactly why you need to seek and find a bonding partner as soon as possible. Those males who assaulted you and your sibling still hold a large part of you captive. I would like very much to help free that part of you, but I’m not offering that at the moment. I’m certainly not going to attack you in this storage closet I’m supposed to use as a workroom.”
Seta clinched her teeth at his calm assurance. It was impossible to trust his words when his tone was laced with his trademark arrogance. Yet despite that fact, she had to plough past the contradictions and tell him what she came for. There was no one else to hear her on the ship. She needed a confidante so she could not afford to back down.
“Ji, I did not ask to speak with you to discuss the situation between us. I wanted to ask you a more serious question.” Seta had used his name reluctantly, but hoped it might take the Siren’s attention off bonding with her long enough for her to genuinely speak to him.
“Seta, the situation between us is the most serious issue in my life. I would do pretty much anything you ask for a single night with you so I can start moving past this obsession,” Ji admitted with a shrug. “Since I share your apprehension about my reaction to your presence, I suggest you speak your question quickly. The intimacy of this room is testing my resolve to be noble where you are concerned. I can only guarantee
your safety for a short time.”
Seta met and held Ji’s gaze. Guarantee her safety? Though she hated his relentless pursuit of her, she trusted him in every other way. It was a bizarre dilemma, and yet still a profound truth. Now that she and Rena weren’t on great terms, she had no choice but to use the Siren as her confidante. Malachi was her second choice and his biases were too obvious for her to consider him seriously.
“Whenever I speak of any matter, Rena assumes the demon I host is now speaking instead of me. This is not the case, but all my efforts to convince my sibling of this truth have been unsuccessful. I have recently become aware of something that I have not shared with anyone yet. I need advice about it. Outside of Rena, you’re the only being I trust on this crew.”
Seta watched Ji’s arms come down, watched his long, elegant fingers gripping the edges of his seat. She swallowed hard while she waited, nervous at the surprise in his expression.
“You trust me?” Ji asked, the words causing a tightness in his throat.
At Seta’s nod, he closed his eyes. To hear she trusted him was an unexpected gift. Until this moment he had convinced himself that the Ethosian female was only capable of loathing him. To have her trust was a tiny spark of hope, but perhaps enough to build a fire with one day. Hope flared to fill him. He swallowed several times before trusting himself enough to speak calmly.
“I am honored to hear those words, Seta Trax. May the Creators help me to never disappoint you.”
Seta nodded. The heartfelt emotion in Ji Warro’s response had her swallowing hard again. She vowed to herself that one day she would manage a conversation with the Siren male without feeling this level of emotional fear.
“Yes . . . well. It is an important matter or I would not be here,” she admitted.
“Speak at will then and know that I’m sincerely listening,” Ji said, wishing he could embrace her. He crossed him arms again to keep himself in place on the seat.
“Let’s start our discussion then with a bold question. Do you trust Captain Synar?”
Ji considered the question briefly and then nodded. “Yes—mostly. But I am still deciding to what degree. He is an odd but effective leader. His highest people trust him. Synar’s mate is another matter. My guard stays up when Peace Keeper Looren is nearby—now more so than ever. Something happened to her just before we left the Liberator. I was not told the full story, but apparently they had to sedate the Pleiadian female after some kind of episode.”
Seta nodded. “Yes. Well, that’s actually what I came to talk about. I wasn’t told the details either, but I’ve spent a lot of time with Rena . . . ” she paused, blinking rapidly at his swelling empathy. “I’m sorry for my ramblings. This is complicated and hard to explain. My thoughts about it are more scattered than I would wish. Do you believe I retain all my faculties despite my demon possession?”
“Absolutely.” Ji was glad he could say it with such conviction. He had wrestled long with that very question and did owe Synar for helping him come to terms with it. Whatever the Norblade’s true motivations, he had no doubt the male was honorable.
He relaxed when she did.
“Thank you for the speedy answer,” Seta said.
“You know that trust you say you feel for me? Well, I feel a similar loyalty toward you, Seta. I would give you the benefit of doubt until it was proved wrong.”
“Since I badly need someone to do that, I’ll take that concession and be grateful for it,” Seta said, nodding.
Ji bowed his head. “You have nothing to fear in sharing whatever you wish with me.”
Seta nodded as she continued. Pacing in the tiny room was impossible.
“I am sensing the same kind of energy in Peace Keeper Looren that is in Rena. It is not like my demon’s nor like Malachi’s. This energy is different, appearing to me as being much brighter and larger. When I first noticed it in Rena, I mentioned it to her. She said it was the remnants of the emissary. I did not tell her about what I saw in Peace Keeper Looren because I could tell Rena doesn’t want to believe me.”
“I see. Have you completely stopped trusting your sibling?” Ji asked, the fact making him sad for her. He did not have the Ethosian siblings’ kind of connection with any of his Siren siblings, but he at least liked and trusted them enough to be unguarded.
“I have been asking myself that question all week. In this matter, I have no doubt Rena would betray my trust because she doesn’t trust me back. That is why I am here. My question to you is should I share my observations with Captain Synar? Ania Looren is his mate, not just the Liberator’s Peace Keeper. When he and Malachi talked with us, I got the feeling they both thought Rena was lying to them. I don’t want to add to that volatile situation with something I cannot prove.”
Ji lifted his gaze to study the ceiling. “If I were captain of this ship, I would want to know even the smallest of details of any situation that is suspect. I confess it bothers me that neither of us has been allowed into the inner circle. That alone makes me question what is best in your situation.”
“I feel a reluctance to go to him,” Seta said.
Ji nodded. “Indeed. I have not even been told what the next mission is concerning.”
“That I do know. We’re going to Norblade to find a missing Allurean.”
“Allurean? They are extinct,” Ji said. He wished he had brought a portable com into the room so he could look up their history.
Seta sighed and nodded. “I thought the same at first. The Allureans were hunted for their ability to regenerate. Since so many of them were killed during those years of struggle and no records exist of survivors, extinction was just assumed to have happened. I’m going along on the mission to help track her down.”
“Then I will be going as well,” Ji said softly.
Seta shook her head. “The mission team has already met, Ji. You weren’t on it.”
“That is an oversight. You’re not going to Norblade alone. Not all the males there are as civilized as Synar. A good third of the population has refused to advance their thinking about females,” Ji said firmly.
“Why are we arguing over this? Not that it’s any concern of yours, but I won’t be going alone. I won’t even be the only female. They’re sending Boca Ador in case a medic is needed. Ensign Karr is going along as a general guard. The rest is me, the captain, and Malachi in some form,” Seta said. “Commander Jet will be minding the ship. Lieutenant Zade is supposed to be interviewing some potential new crew members. Synar didn’t mention what Peace Keeper Looren would be doing.”
“Intriguing. I’ll definitely be at the next meeting. I’m sorry now I opted to miss the last one,” Ji said, standing and walking toward Seta. He smiled when she opened the door to escape his approach.
“You didn’t answer my original question,” Seta said.
Ji stopped as close as he dared to gaze down at her. “Hold your information for now. Tell Synar about the energy in his mate when it seems right to do so.”
“How will I know when that is?” Seta asked.
Ji smiled. He lifted a hand and very slowly reached out to stroke a finger along the tip of one pointed ear. Her shiver shook them both.
“In this and many other matters, you must learn to trust yourself. When the proper time comes, you will know what you need to do.”
She trembled under Ji’s stroking hand as she nodded, then turned and walked quickly away. Escaping the Siren’s soft, soothing voice was a strong motivator. It felt more dangerous to her and was far more intimidating than any mission.
Ji watched Seta flee from the energy jumping between them until she was out of sight. Then he walked to the nearest wall com unit and pressed the button. On the upgraded ship, the wall com units could be set to sense who was speaking, but it took too long to process the data in his opinion. Patience was a virtue he had in short supply and Seta had used up his quota for the day.
“Schedule a private meeting with Captain Synar. Tell him it’s about the upcoming miss
ion. Send his response to the personal com in my quarters. Copy me here just in case.”
“Processing, Lieutenant Warro. Estimated time to complete task is four Earth minutes,” the com unit replied.
Good, he thought. That was just enough time for him to tell the ensign on duty that he was leaving.
Chapter 8
Kefira settled comfortably in the middle of the Rylen meditation mat, appreciative of the peacefulness in the room. It was a rarity to find a sacred space on a ship full of warriors. Dorian Zade had done an excellent job of setting the energy in the Guardian 13’s newly remodeled sanctuary.
She was calmly counting her breaths when the door sliding open behind her announced that she was not alone. All her internal alarms went off followed by millions of tiny hairs on her body rising to attention. Of all the creatures she had encountered to date, including emissaries and demons, no being had energy like the one that had just sought her out.
“I apologize for interrupting your meditations, but I needed to speak with you alone. I confess I used the com to track you down here,” Ania said.
Kefira sighed and swiveled on the rug to face the female addressing her. “Then I will confess back that I’ve been intentionally avoiding you, so you need not feel guilty. We both know that avoidance only works for a short time. You are welcome to join me on the mat.”
Ania slipped out of her shoes and padded across the soft surface. She dropped to her knees in front of Kefira and adopted a pose that matched hers.
“The Creators have put you into a cycle of evolution, Ania Looren. I commend you on your courage and your endurance,” Kefira said, bowing her head.
“When I am struggling this hard to constrain my frustration, it can too easily escalate into a dangerous situation for all those around me. Because of the latest creature who has possessed me, I am once again unable to meditate. Dorian has tried to help me and failed. Synar’s happiness annoys me rather than soothes. Those two truths have left me no hope for working through this on my own. ”
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