Baby On His Hollywood Doorstep (Brides 0f The Roaring Twenties Book 1)

by Lauri Robinson

  Even now, the simplest touch of his finger beneath her chin thrilled her, and she hated the idea that she had to end it.

  She’d tried. Tried harder than she’d ever tried before, but even though Uncle Vinnie hadn’t contacted her, she knew he was out there. Despite what he said, she was still his niece. Would always be his niece, and at some point, that was going to affect Jack.

  “Tell me what it is,” he said.

  Helen pushed out the air burning her lungs. Forgetting who she was, who she’d been born as, wasn’t possible. She’d tried but finally had to admit that was as bad as hiding. More so because this time, she was hiding inside herself. “It’s nothing, really.” She forced her smile to be brighter and kissed his cheek again. “Other than Grace is going to need a bottle soon.”

  She did that more often than not lately, used Grace as an excuse. Especially to herself. Actually, she’d been doing that since the baby had been born. She loved her, truly, truly did, just as she loved him. That was what made this so hard. Had made it all so hard from the beginning.

  History, the past she couldn’t forget, couldn’t erase, was a heavy burden, but it was her burden. Not his, and not Grace’s. Uncle Vinnie might have released her from the family, but if anyone ever found out her connections to them, the North End Gang, or some other family competing with the Outfit could and would use that to their advantage. And she couldn’t risk that involving Grace or Jack. She wouldn’t.

  Jack opened the car door, and she climbed in, settling Grace on her lap. She tried to sound happy on the ride home, talked about the house he would have built, but her acting ability failed her today.

  Jack remained unusually quiet all the way home, and the heavy sigh he let out as they arrived at their apartment door caused a solid knot of guilt to form in her stomach.

  She needed to tell him the truth. That she couldn’t pretend that the past wouldn’t catch up with her. At some point. At some time. “Jack, I—”

  He shook his head. “I gave Julia a key.” He nodded his head toward the door. “She’s inside waiting.”

  “Why?” Concern flashed inside her. “Is something wrong?”

  “No.” He grew serious, perhaps even a bit unsure. “I asked her to watch Grace so I could take you out for dinner. Just the two of us. We have some things we need to discuss.”

  They did. Whether she was ready for it to happen or not. “All right.”

  He gave a slight nod, then twisted the doorknob.

  She walked in first, and her feet slid to a stop, gluing themselves to the floor. Julia was there. So was a man. Even if she hadn’t seen pictures of him, Helen would have known it was Joe. She tightened her hold on Grace and willed herself not to turn around and run back out the door.

  “Jack!” Joe had stood and walked around the coffee table. Coming toward them. “It’s good to see you, little brother. So good.”

  Jack walked around her and the brothers hugged, slapped each other on the back.

  “This must be my daughter, Grace,” Joe said.

  “Yes, this is Grace,” Jack said. “And Helen.”

  Helen held her breath as a newfound fear filled her. This was the bridge she’d never wanted to cross, but had to, despite the fast-flowing water beneath. Rapids. White-water rapids. And rocks. Cliffs. Huge cliffs.

  “Helen?”

  She looked up at Jack.

  “Joe asked if he could hold Grace.”

  No. Wishing she could, but knowing she couldn’t deny Joe anything when it came to Grace, she handed Grace to Joe.

  “She looks like me, don’t you think?” Joe was holding Grace at arm’s length, both hands around her waist. “You too, little brother, she looks like you did when you were little.”

  “I wouldn’t remember that,” Jack said. “Careful, she might think you’re going to drop her, holding her out like that.”

  “Oh.” Joe brought Grace up against his chest, and stiffly patted her back while turning his head far to the side. “I’m not very good at this. Never held a baby before.”

  “Just imagine you’re acting.” There wasn’t necessarily scorn in Julia’s voice, more like disappointment. Same with the look she cast toward Jack. “I’m assuming you don’t need me to watch her this evening.”

  “No.” There was serious disappointment in his tone.

  “I’ll be going then.” She lifted her purse off the floor before rising from the chair. “Guess I’ll be seeing you around, Joe.”

  “No, you won’t. My train ticket is round-trip. California is no longer for me.” Joe sat in an armchair and bounced Grace on his knee. “But it was good seeing you, Julia.”

  “You, too.” Julia stopped near Jack on her way to the door. “I’ll see you two later.”

  Jack nodded.

  When Julia’s eyes settled on her, Helen almost burst into tears. There were no words needed. None that could be said, either. Julia shook her head then gave her a tight hug before she walked out the door.

  Helen couldn’t stand still any longer. It wasn’t doing her any good. “I—I have a meatloaf ready to go in the oven.”

  Jack took ahold of her arm.

  She shook her head and walked into the kitchen. There, she grasped ahold of the back of one chair and took a few moments to breathe. Just breathe. She was so sick and tired of this life she’d been given.

  “How long are you staying?” she heard Jack ask Joe.

  “Don’t know. Not long,” Joe replied. “Heard about your latest movie. A real hit. Starring Boyd.”

  “And Wes Jenkins.”

  “Wes. How’s he doing? I always liked him.”

  “Good. He’s doing good.”

  Helen released the chair and lit the oven before going to the refrigerator for the meatloaf she’d assembled that afternoon. The potatoes were ready to bake too, and the cucumber salad was in a bowl, chilling. If she hadn’t been so efficient earlier, she’d have more to do right now. She liked having everything ready when Jack got home, but right now, something to occupy her would be heaven sent.

  “Newton still directing for you?” Joe asked.

  “Yes.”

  While they talked about a few other crew members, she took a bottle of milk out of the refrigerator and put it in a pan of boiling water to warm. Grace would be getting hungry soon, and would need to be changed.

  She was checking the milk temperature by dribbling some on her wrist when Jack said something that stopped her in her tracks. Holding her breath, she waited for Joe’s answer. Waited until her ears started ringing.

  “Joe, I said I don’t think Grace should go to South Carolina with you,” Jack repeated.

  “I heard what you said, Jack,” Joe answered. “And I can’t say I disagree with you.”

  Helen’s heart did a somersault. She spun around and hurried to the doorway, not wanting to miss a word.

  Grace might have noticed her or the bottle, either way, she began to whimper and squirm.

  Joe glanced her way, then held Grace up.

  Helen collected Grace and kissed her before sitting down on the couch to feed her.

  “You’ve been taking care of her since she was born?” Joe asked.

  He looked a lot like his picture, except thinner, his cheeks more prominent. Far thinner than Jack, that was for sure, and not nearly as handsome.

  “Yes,” she said. “I met Vera shortly before Grace was born.”

  Joe nodded and planted his elbows on his knees. “Looks like you’ve done a good job with her.”

  “Helen’s done an excellent job of taking care of Grace,” Jack said, leveling a serious stare at his brother. “She couldn’t have better care. Not from anyone.”

  “Jack’s done a lot for her, too,” Helen said. “He’s provided everything Grace has needed. Food, clothes, furniture, toys, everything.”

  �
��I knew you would,” Joe said. “That’s why I didn’t rush right out here. You were the youngest, yet the one everyone else depended on.” He huffed out a chuckle. “Remember how you used to steal eggs?”

  “We used to steal eggs,” Jack corrected.

  “Yes, I was along many times, but there were others, when the folks and I would be practicing our lines and you’d be nowhere in sight. Later, we’d discover it was because you’d been out finding supper so we could eat after performing that night.”

  “You were the star of the family. Not me.”

  There was no animosity in Jack’s tone, or on his face. Helen glanced at Joe, who was looking down at the floor.

  Jack leaned back in his chair. “I need you to think about what I’m about to say, Joe. Think long and hard because I’m being dead serious.”

  Joe didn’t look up, but nodded, and Helen held her breath. She had no idea what Jack was about to say, but had never seen him so stone-faced. “Grace is a baby, and babies need constant care. I can say that from experience, having lived with one for well over two months. Don’t get me wrong, Grace is a good baby, but I believe most of that is because of the care Helen gives her.”

  Helen wanted to add and you, but because she wasn’t sure what Jack would say next, she held her silence.

  “It’s not just care,” he said. “It’s love. Babies need to be loved. Not just to fix bottles and change diapers, but in the middle of the night when they are fussy, teething or just being cranky. That’s when they need someone who loves them the most. Some who will walk the floor all night long, no matter how tired they are, and never lose their patience.”

  Jack’s gaze had settled on her, and Helen pressed her lips together to keep from saying that even those things were a pleasure. He already knew she felt that way. He was trying to make his brother understand all it was going to take in order for him to care for Grace.

  “Providing for a child is one thing. Buying them things. Making sure they have clothes and milk.” Jack had settled his gaze back on Joe. “If you can’t tell me you have that for Grace, right now, today, then I can’t let you take her. Won’t let you take her.”

  Helen’s heart leaped into her throat. She knew Jack loved Grace, but hadn’t expected him to say that. Joe was Grace’s father.

  “It’s for her own good, Joe. Grace’s own good,” Jack said. “You think about that. Not yourself. Not what you want. But her. What she needs, and will need for years to come.”

  Joe lifted his head slowly, cautiously. “You’d be willing to keep her?”

  Helen bit down on her bottom lip so hard she tasted blood.

  “Yes.” Jack reached over and laid a hand on her knee. “I am, but not just until you find someone to care for her. It will be forever. When she’s old enough, I’ll make sure she knows you’re her real father, but she’ll live with me, because you’ll have to consent to me legally adopting her.”

  Joe rose and walked across the room to the table by the door, and stood there with his back to them for some time.

  Helen looked at Jack, and though his smile was meant to reassure her, there was worry in his eyes. Inside her, too. If Joe said no, there was nothing anyone could do.

  “I didn’t want to have to ask you that, Jack. Didn’t want to saddle you with one more of my mistakes. I’ve done that to you my entire life.” Joe turned around and tears glistened in his eyes. “Truth is, I had to get clearance to come here. From a doctor at the sanitarium. I have TB. Almost everyone that worked at the circus did. Living the way we did. In tents. Cold, damp, tents.” He shook his head. “I left as soon as I discovered I had it, hoping Vera didn’t. She was so healthy then. Full of life.”

  Helen set the bottle down and clutched Grace close. She’d thought the TB scare was over.

  Joe looked at her. “I made sure I didn’t breathe on her and I haven’t had a coughing spell for over three weeks. The spores live in the lungs and are expelled into the air by coughs. I took the time to learn everything I could about how it’s spread before coming here.” He turned to Jack. “In truth, I considered not coming, but I had to. I couldn’t leave this all on your shoulders, Jack. I’ve done that too often. Far too often. But you’re right about Grace, about caring for her. I don’t have what she needs. I’ll never have that. I’m told that I’ll be able to live outside of a sanitarium someday, but I can’t say when, and it wouldn’t be fair for me to make promises that I can’t keep. Not to Grace, or you.”

  Jack stood up, and walked to Joe.

  Helen could see the concern on his face. Feel it in her heart.

  He laid a hand on Joe’s shoulder. “Are you getting good care there? Dr. Baine said the best sanitarium in the world is right here, in California.”

  “I can’t live in California, remember?” Joe wiped at his eyes and grinned. “I’m getting good care. It’s a good place. Been there over a year now. Actually, I’m a star again. There. I do my juggling shows and magic tricks. Sing and dance when I can. Mainly I teach others. How to act. How to pretend to be strong and brave even when you aren’t.”

  “I bet they love you as much as all your other audiences did,” Jack said.

  Helen had to wipe her eyes, had to stop the tears from falling, but it was no use, when Jack was hurting, she was hurting.

  That pain increased as the brothers hugged. She glanced down at Grace, and then at the brothers again. Jack had overcome so much in his life, yet didn’t let it define him. Didn’t let it rule him.

  It was one of the many things she loved about him.

  A tingle made the hair on her arms stand up. Perhaps it was time that she didn’t let her past define her, either.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “You did what?” Over the past couple of months, Jack had been flustered by Helen, frustrated, worried, frightened for her safety, but he’d never been mad at something she’d done. Until this moment. He was beyond mad. Furious. So furious he couldn’t think straight. “What the hell were you thinking?” He pushed away from his office desk and shot to his feet. “You weren’t thinking. Obviously. Because only a dumb Dora—”

  “Stop shouting!” She slammed her hand on his desk.

  “—would do what you just did!” he finished his statement at the top of his lungs.

  “You’re going to wake—”

  A wail like he’d never heard before emitted from the buggy by the sofa, interrupting Helen.

  “Grace!” Glaring at him, she spun around and marched to the buggy, and promptly picked up Grace.

  Guilt struck him as the baby, eyes scrunched, sobbed out another wail.

  “Are you happy now?” Helen asked, bouncing Grace with one hand while digging a bottle out of her purse with her other. “Waking her? Making her cry?”

  Still mad, he waved a hand. “She’s probably scared to death over what you did. She was there that night, too.” He stormed around the edge of desk. “So was I, and I heard every word!”

  “Quit yelling!” Helen shouted over Grace’s wails, who wanted nothing to do with the bottle. “Do you want everyone in the studio to hear?”

  “I want you to hear! Evidently you didn’t that night!” Exasperated, he threw his arms in the air. “Are you trying to get yourself bumped off?”

  “Of course not!”

  “It doesn’t sound that way to me!”

  In the split second of silence between his shout and another wail from Grace, a knock sounded on the door.

  His anger peaked. “Go away!”

  Helen glared at him, then shouted, “Come in!”

  Grace wailed.

  The door opened and Beverly walked in. Holding a single finger in the air and not saying a word, she crossed the room, took Grace and the bottle from Helen, and walked back to the door, out it, closed it behind her.

  “Now there’s a smart woman!”

  If Helen’
s eyes could have held bullets, he’d be dead right now. Probably would be in a few days after what she’d done.

  As if reading his mind, Helen stomped forward. “I did it for you! For Joe!”

  He squeezed his temples with one hand. It didn’t help collect his mind, but he did lower his voice so no one outside the door could hear. “Did you forget what your uncle said that night? I didn’t. Why would you contact him?”

  “No, I didn’t forget, and I just told you.” She heaved out a sigh. “For you and your brother.”

  “Neither of us need you talking to a mob boss.”

  She rolled her eyes and then settled a stare on him. “I didn’t just go knock on his door.”

  “I’d hope not.” He couldn’t believe this. Couldn’t believe she’d contacted her uncle. For any reason. In any way. “What did you do? Pick up the phone?”

  “No.” She crossed her arms.

  He tried not to notice how her breasts rose and fell, or how the sparkling blue dress hugged her curves. He should be too mad for that.

  “I know how to get a message to someone when I need to.”

  Her saucy attitude did not impress him. “Oh, you know how, do you?”

  “Yes, I do, but I won’t tell you, so don’t ask.”

  “I don’t want to know!” Frustrated, he grabbed her by both arms. “Damn it, Helen. He wasn’t blowing smoke.”

  “No, he wasn’t, but I still had to contact him.”

  Jack was still mad, so was she, but the sincerity in her tone swirled around his heart. He loved her so much, and the danger she’d just put herself in petrified him. That’s why he was so mad. He was about to have everything. Her, Grace. They were everything to him. “No, you didn’t, honey. You didn’t have to do anything.”

  She broke away from him and spun around. “Yes, I did.”