"I don't think you understand the situation, Cleo."
"I understand he's a sweet guy and that's something you need and I understand he'd take really good care of you, I've seen him when you were sick how good he takes care of you, and I understand if you give him a chance, he could mean a lot to you. What more is there to understand? This doesn't have anything to do with your mom anymore."
"He told you about that?"
"He mentioned due to some ties he had with your mom in the past it could affect your relationship today."
Nicole huffed. "Just like him to come out smelling like roses, Cleo. Men are so deceitful."
"I don't really care what happened with your mother and him and neither should you. He wants to be with you and that's all that counts. Nicole I think you should give him a chance. I think he can bring a lot to the table regarding pleasing you. He looks like he could pack something big for you."
Nicole flushed getting her meaning. "You mean having sex?"
"Yes! I wouldn't mind giving him a ride myself if he wasn't so dedicated to you."
"I don't want any part of him. I've had a taste of it Cleo and it's not all it's cracked up to be."
Cleo's eyes went big as saucers. "You did it?"
Nicole confessed so glad to be able to tell someone about it. "Yes, and it was horrible Cleo. There was so much pain."
"Pain?" Cleo looked confused. "Were you ready for him? Was there any foreplay? Did he touch you?"
If she were any lighter, she was positive her cheeks would be scarlet. "Yes, there was foreplay and before he did it, I was feeling very good."
"Maybe you were uptight and nervous."
Nicole was frustrated not really knowing how to explain to her what happened. "I expected to be nervous on my first time, but until he hurt me like that, it was feeling nice."
Cleo almost choked on her coffee. "You're a virgin, Nicole?"
"It's no big thing. That has nothing to do with what happened?"
"That has everything to do with it, Nicole. Did it hurt at first?"
"Like a hot knife. That's why I told him to take it out."
"You what? You didn't finish? How could you do that to him Nicole?"
"Do that to him? What about what he did to me? He hurt me."
"You probably didn't let him finish."
"I was bleeding all over the place."
Cleo drew Nicole in her arms for comfort. "That's because you're suppose to bleed. You would have been okay. I'm surprised he didn't kill you. Didn't anyone ever tell-" She stopped. "You poor thing. It's important you finish it with him, Nicole. Especially after everything you went through with Marvin and-"
Nicole drew away. "How did you know?"
"Ethan told me. I felt so bad when I knew Marvin did that."
"It only happened once." She sat down outside of Nanna's room. "He dragged me up there after Lynne left the night of the beating and said he'd make sure no man would want to touch me after he got through. I passed out at the first second of pain and when I woke up I was locked in the room feeling like death warmed over me."
"You don't think you should speak to someone regarding what happened to you?"
Nicole shrugged. "I guess."
"I also think you should finish what you started with Ethan. It's the only way. You were a virgin and you'll be forever traumatized if you don't. Next time, just do it all the way."
"I'm never doing that again. Especially with him."
"You have."
"You have to go and do it with him or you'll be scarred for life."
"I won't, Cleo. I can't. There's too much to think about right now." She was really getting frustrated. "You don't know the whole story behind it all and I really don't want to go into it. He used me."
"So what! Use him back. Use him to get over this fear of sex because if you don't no matter what all you'll think about is him. You'll never get him out of your system. Men use women for sex all the time. This is the nineties girl, women can use men all we want and not feel an ounce of guilt."
"It's too complicated."
"Only if you make it, Nicole. He's there all alone in that beautiful house just waiting for you to knock on the door at night. Don't let him speak or reason, because when he does he'll only make you nervous. Take control of the situation and use him. If it hurts don't make him stop, just tell him what feels right and what doesn't. Men like it when a woman lets them know how to make love to them."
"It sounds easy, but I know it's not."
"It's only as hard as you make it out to be. You can easily get to him. He's waiting for you. Once it's over with, all you have to do is get up and leave."
"Just leave?"
"Yes. Don't even tell him you're going. Wait until he's asleep and leave."
Nicole only stared into space trying to find out where her courage would be just to show her face up in front of him.
"The perfect time would be tomorrow night. That's when I will be off both jobs and can come to the hospital while you're at his place," Cleo hinted.
Her stomach felt like her muscles were tying in knots at the thought of seeing him again. "I don't know if I can get over the fact that he used me, Cleo."
"That doesn't matter. You're going there to get what you want. That's what's wrong with women know, you let your personal feelings get in the way of enjoyment. You'll get no pleasure out of life if you allow that to happen, Nicole. Like I said, use him. Use him until you get tired."
Nicole blushed cleared down to her toes as she stood up. "They should be done with Nanna by now, Cleo. I'll call you tomorrow if I need you."
"Call me early so I can bring everything you need here." She kissed her cheek and left.
Nicole sat by Nanna's side and thought hard about what she wanted to do. When the nurse came in, she questioned if there was a psychologist on duty for family care. The nurse nodded and gave her instructions to the room.
"I'll be here until nine to watch over her."
Nicole thanked her and left out in search of someone else to speak to.
Chapter 10
Chapter 10
Ethan stared thoughtfully into the fire wondering what he would do once he finished this project. Most likely sell it and find something else to involve himself on. James had notified him today, they were done with the external structure of their recent project on a seven story apartment building. He knew if he threw himself into his work more he could forget about it, but it was so difficult when his thoughts were consumed with her. As far as he knew she was by Nanna's side and no one was positive if Nanna would live past the end of this week before she would need a machine to breath.
Cleo had suggested that he go to the hospital, but what could he possibly demand? She allowed him to finish making love to her? That would be rich. His luck would run out and Lynne would probably be present and laugh to high heaven at him when Nicole slapped him across the face.
Still it bothered him that she was going around thinking the act of making love was horrible and it was all because of him. He didn't want her like that and he wanted to find out if he could bring her pleasure.
‘So go and get her!’ he told himself. Going to the closet by the door, he snatched the familiar white sheepskin jacket and tossed it on. Opening his front door he almost collided right into the very woman he was thinking of.
"Were you about to leave?" she asked raising a dark curious brow.
He could only shake his head from a loss of words at the beautiful sight of her. His eyes went from the tip of her flowing lightly curled face to the high pumps accentuating the beautiful ankles. Her long black coat was opened to reveal the black after five velvet dress with the split on the side. When he looked back at her and was about to speak she stepped forward and pressed her index finger to his lips.
"Just one night, Ethan."
With no explanation other than that, he drew her in his arms and carried her inside. His mouth didn't stop praising her for the decision, until after he'd kicked the
door closed, went up the steps and was laying her on the bed. Her hands moved the jacket off his broad shoulders and then she started on unbuttoning his plaid shirt. When she got that off, she threw it to the floor. He didn't want to stop touching her too afraid she would change her mind. His lips moved to her neck as his fingers worked frantically at the zipper of her dress in the back. Once he moved that aside pushing it down past her hips, he worked on the bra and worshipped in her beauty she allowed him to reveal.
She trembled underneath his worshipful wet kisses as he drew the taunt nipple into his mouth. She placed his hand on the other breast and he gently massaged the firm aroused flesh. Her sighs of pleasure were encouraging to him as he moved downward licking, kissing and tantalizing the smooth chocolate flesh with his tongue and hands.
Tasting the sweetness of her aroused him as well. His lips were ever so soft as he suckled the nectar then delved deep into the warmness that yearned for his touch.
"More," she whispered.
Ethan spread her legs wider giving her pleasure beyond belief until she cried out his name and he felt the pulsing eruption of her orgasm surround his fingers that had assisted his mouth in bringing her to pleasure. Arising to ease her trembling body in his arms, the full length of him slipped inside of her as her back arched to meet him. He could feel her nails dig into his back and her legs lock around his waist. She was almost oblivious to the world around him, but as her hips arched higher and higher he met each thrust enjoying her responses to her movements and watching as she praised him with her voice and body for the Valhalla he took her to. Never in his life had he given so much of himself to a woman in order to please her and he knew as he brought her to the finale' with him and tears fell down her cheek, there had been no pain, but pure unadulterated enjoyment for the both of them.
He kissed her with all the passion inside of him and she equaled his as her body seemed to float above everything and join his senses. They became one and it didn't matter about what the past had wrought or the present had to offer. The here and now was all that mattered to them at that point and reality was like a dream far far away. He held her close never wanting this moment to end, but not wanting to go on afraid he might make her sore.
A giggle escaped her lips and he looked down at her with questions in his eyes.
"Now I know why the French call it little death."
He smiled then gasped as she gyrated her hips with him still inside of her deeply embedded inside. Just as he started to speak, she again placed her finger on his lips and pulled him close.
Her brown eyes danced in excitement as she whispered, "Can I have more?"
A wicked grin curled his lips. "Just tell me when to stop."
Nicole never wanted him to stop.
####
The early morning sun awakened her and she tried to sit up, but a secure arm over her chest prevented this action. Looking over at him, a well satisfied grin was on his lips, but he was sleep. Sliding down, she was able to unravel her body from around his without waking him up. She located her dress under the bed and found her coat at the bottom of the steps along with her shoes. Nicole didn't dare try to awake him by trying to find her underwear.
Hurriedly she slipped out and returned to the hospital to change places with Cleo.
"I forgot to tell Marvin that some lady came by the Laundromat the other day." She fished in her wallet and pulled out a card. "Her name was Ebony Reed of Executive Business Basic."
"That's the insurance on the business." She took the card. "Why would she come by? I sent the check two months in advance."
Cleo shrugged. "Heck if I know. I really meant to tell Marvin because I thought it strange for her to come by too especially after business hours. She said she was heading home and no one had returned her phone calls."
Nicole thanked her and Cleo left. It was eight in the morning and she decided to see if Ms. Reed was in her office. "Good morning, Ms. Reed, My name is Nicole Gray; I was told you came by Nanna's Laundromat. What was this concerning?"
"Oh yes, Ms. Gray." There was some fumbling of paper, then Ms. Reed said, "The check received a month ago payment was stopped."
"Stop? The bank stop payment on your check?"
"Yes. I've been leaving messages, but no one has returned any of my phone calls. I figured you went with another company, but something kept telling me to get some kind of response from your business, so I went by yesterday because I was visiting someone over there and decided to stop in."
"I'll check into it, but I'm positive there shouldn't be a stop payment on the business insurance. How much is owed?"
"Really it's just two hundred dollars, because you sent an over payment in the summer that was adjusted to be caught up."
"My grandmother has fallen ill and I'm doing vigil at her bedside. I could get the money to you tomorrow."
"Well now that I have you on the phone, I'm worried I shouldn't let another night pass without renewing this. Where are you? I could come by there and pick it up by this afternoon."
She figured she could get down to the hospital's ATM machine and get the money out of her own account then just reimburse herself when Mr. Parker decided in her favor, if he didn't then she would discuss having him reimburse her. Ms. Reed agreed to this and Nicole gave her the address of the hospital. When she hung up, she found her phone book and called the bank to find out that Marvin had put a stop payment on all the last months’ checks she had sent out and withdrawn all the money from the accounts and closed them.
She immediately called Armando Bellini to alert him of this fact. Armando assured her he would be on the next Bellini jet to Detroit by the morning no later, and if she could meet him at the hotel so they could discuss what had happened. She had informed him that she had not heard from Parker Mills yet, but would know by then end of the day what the decision would be.
Armando had no doubt Mr. Mills would join her. She was honored by his support in the matter. Once she got off the phone with him, she spoke with the doctor who as always had disappointing news. He gave Nanna less than three days.
"Especially if we don't put her on the machine."
Nicole cried a little for her grandmother knowing this last episode had definitely put Nanna very close to death's door and soon she would be joining Grandpa and Ecole. She remembered Nanna's words of encouragement and how she had never really got to tell her about Ethan.
When she had gone to her the next night Nanna had only said whatever Nicole chose she should be happy with the decision. "It doesn't matter about his past, Nicole nor about what the future holds. If at the present he makes you happy, allow yourself to trust what you feel. Allow him to make you happy and if you think he could make you happy for the rest of your life, and then let him. Never deny the pleasures of life because they are so few and so very frequent."
Curling up in the chair, she fell a sleep thinking about Ethan and their night together. Going to him had been the best decision. She felt so open and free and the pains of yesterdays were gone away. Nicole was ready to live and love… she just wished she didn't feel she could live and love Ethan for the rest of her life.
When they took away the lunch tray for Nicole, she was surprised to see her mother standing at the doorway looking at the bed. Nicole stiffened knowing Lynne had not seen her yet because she was seated behind the door. Stepping fully in the room and letting the door closed, Lynne gasped as she laid her eyes on Nicole.
This had been the reason for Nicole staying at her grandmother's side. She didn't want Marvin or Lynne near her; because she knew one of them had caused this latest episode.
"I spoke to the doctor," Lynne said quietly. "They said she won't make it past the end of the week."
"Nanna's survived this long, I'm hoping that's not true, but I'm also realistic." She stood up and went to Nanna's side as if to protect her. "Why are you here?" She had her back to Lynne.
"I wanted to see her."
"You should have done that a long time ago, Lynne wh
en she was well. If you came to make peace with her, you're a little too late."
"I didn't come here for a fight, Nicole. I came to see you and my mother."
"You still think of her as that?"
"I can't deny her."
"You've denied me; I figured you were on a roll."
Lynne bit her lip. "Like I said Nicole, I didn't come here for a fight." She came closer to the bed, but kept her distance as if she were scared to get any closer. "You were the daughter she wished she had in me."
Nicole faced Lynne. "Someone had to give her joy after Ecole died."
"It wasn't fair that she tried to make me into someone I wasn't."
"That's not what she was asking. She just wanted you to be happy. That's all Nanna ever wanted from anyone. You were ashamed of her." She took Nanna's hand. "Make your peace and leave."
"I can't think of what to say now that you're both here. I've always thought about what I would say to you when the time came Nicole, but now that it's here, I can't think of what would make the hurt go away."
"Nothing. Nothing you could say would make me believe you were sorry for the abuse I've suffered because of you. Nanna always said action speaks louder than any words."
"Then there's nothing I could do."
"Nothing."
Lynne bowed her head in defeat and quietly left.
Quietly to herself, Nicole said looking at Nanna, "She could have tried." Yet it wasn't in Lynne's nature to try to think of something to make things better. Guilt was probably plaguing her and came down her to see what her handiwork had wrought.
Near four o'clock she received a message from Ethan telling her to meet him near downtown at a new apartment complex they were in the process of working on. She really wanted to go and called Cleo to see if she could bring her daughter for just a couple of hours.
"I'll come there myself."
"Shouldn't you be at work?"
"I should, but Marvin called and said not to report on the shift today. There was some mumbling about changes in the company and that until I was called there wouldn't be anymore shifts there."
Love Like This Page 10