“What did you do?”
Buying time, Lilli thought. Whatever was going on with this woman, whatever she had done that Lilli couldn’t remember now – she had to keep Constance busy and find a way out. Somewhere in her mind, Lilli knew that her life was in danger, but another part of her mind stubbornly ignored that fact, causing a certain strange paralysis in her. She had to act, act! Constance was up to something – with her. Lilli moved her feet. Tied up as well.
“You want to know what I did. I’m happy to tell you, very happy indeed. I have been waiting. For this moment. For you to finally wake up so you can see what’s happening to you.”
“What are you talking about?” Lilli inquired. She moved her wrists unobtrusively, twisting them, trying to loosen the ropes.
“I hated seeing your face every day so much,” Constance said, and it sounded almost indulgent. “How you seduced my brother into following your will. How you offered yourself to him ... I was often on the verge of punching you in the face. I wanted to see your lips split open, to see your smug grin extinguish. And you didn’t disappear, no matter what I did. Sewoldt couldn’t chase you away, I couldn’t. You remained stubborn, running away from your father. How often did I have to pretend to rejoice because of you, when I wanted to strangle you until your tongue came out of your throat? On and on, on and on, you didn’t stop, you desecrated our parents’ tree, you destroyed everything. So stubborn. So ruthless. So, you chose this for yourself. You wanted it.” Constance ran her hand through her hair. “Every day your face. Every day your laugh.” She took a few steps and looked down at the ground. “You’re welcome to scream. If you want, go ahead and scream, I’ll even ask you to. Your screams would do me good, Lilliana, silly girl.”
She kicked a small stone with her foot, which rolled across the floor, then there was a splash, and Lilli realised. Constance had flipped up a grate, a hatch under which there must be water. Maybe an old well. Panic made her rebel and now she was tearing at her bonds quite unabashedly. Amon’s sister wanted to drown her like a nuisance animal. Or more? There was no malice in Constance’s face, she looked quite composed. But still, now the light caught in the knife she held. Slowly she approached Lilli with it.
“I was in Amon’s room,” Constance said, turning the knife thoughtfully in her hand. “You left the compartment on the chalice open. And I found the picture too. Did you want to show it to my brother? Did you think he would believe you? I knew you’d run to the garden afterwards. And that’s where you did an incredibly bad job of disguising yourself. So transparent. You didn’t even notice I was there alone without the guards. And I almost killed you and buried you under my plants. I wanted to tell you that. I really wanted to say that to your face and see ... how you would look at me. Prideful princess of Aurenbrunn. You thought you could seduce my deformed brother and make him your slave. A man who would do anything for such a pretty girl. For a harlot who laughs like an angel while only seeking to destroy the man. Who only wants the crown.” Constance touched the tip of the knife with her fingertip.
“I love Amon!” Lilli hurled at her. “You probably can’t imagine that in your sick mind, but I love him! Just the way he is! And if there’s a harlot in this room who just wants the throne, it’s you! Liar! Murderer!” She shouted the last words at her, tearing at the bonds, but they did not give way. Something seemed to flare in Constance’s eyes, her hand trembling barely visible, Lilli only recognised it by the reflections of the knife.
“You hideous brat. He’ll follow you soon, but I’ll make sure you don’t end up in the same grave.” With three quick steps Constance was with her and Lilli saw the knife flash. She reared up and screamed and her shriek mingled with Constance’s, who now staggered to the side and threw up her arms.
“Get away! Get away from me!” Her voice was drenched in madness and Lilli jerked her head around, following with glances as Constance stumbled into the darkness.
Jheron stepped into Lilli’s field of vision.
He seemed slightly translucent, his footsteps making no sound as he placed himself between the screaming Constance and Lilli.
“This can’t be! Get out of here! Get out!” Constance screamed as Lilli crawled to the knife lying on the ground. Jheron took another step towards his sister.
“You can’t hurt me, you can’t,” Constance gasped. Her eyes looked like black holes in the chalky white face. She breathed audibly. And then she laughed softly. “Yes, that’s it. You have no power here. Otherwise, you would have taken your revenge long ago.” Slowly she stood up. Lilli whimpered and tried to reach the knife, but with her hands behind her back it was hardly possible.
“You are dead,” Constance said to Jheron’s ghost now. “Dead and powerless. That’s how it is. How does it feel, Jheron? Can you speak? Tell me.” She grinned. Then she turned her head and, amazingly, Jheron followed her gaze and looked at Lilli too. She thought she read regret in his lacklustre eyes.
Constance walked towards her, mouth slightly open, triumphant. Lilli gasped and rolled across the floor, heedless of her bound hands scraping across the stone. She saw the hole in the floor approaching, heard the madwoman behind her, and acted without thinking. Lilli rolled over the edge and dropped into the hole, holding her breath as she did so. Behind her she heard Constance’s cry of rage, then the water crashed over her head and icy rushes of complete blackness enveloped her. Lilli resisted the urge to open her mouth and made herself small in the water, curled up, then brushed her bound hands along beneath her body. She had to force her legs through her arms to get her hands in front of her body, but she couldn’t, her dress was in the way and she got so tangled that she had to give up. Lilli turned onto her back and her face broke the surface. Her air-filled lungs had carried her upwards. She breathed out quickly and in again. Constance screamed something from above, Lilli estimated that she had fallen about five steps. Too low to reach for her.
Again, Lilli expelled the air and quickly inhaled again, immediately feeling that she was sinking when she exhaled. After the next deep breath, she curled up again, this time more concentrated, she tightened her legs and managed to bring her hands to the back of her knees as she twisted her feet in the restraints. Her ankle came off the shoe in the water, she felt it float away in the water, then her right foot was free! Lilli immediately tightened her leg, turned it, found the right spot, then first her knee and then her foot slid up her arm. Although she could hardly think with breathlessness, she tried to remain calm as she also bent her left knee at an angle and then pulled her arms in front of her body. Immediately she kicked wildly, towards the air, and as she broke the surface, something hurtled towards her, striking her painfully on the shoulder. In the dim glow of the oil lamp, she saw Constance’s face above her. She disappeared and Lilli could already guess that she was looking for something to push her under the water or she would throw stones at her.
Panicking, Lilli felt her dress pulling her down again and again, wrapping itself around her legs. In addition, her hands were still tied, and she was breathing too fast. She kicked her feet, which felt no ground, and looked around. How deep might this water be? Her gaze flew over the brick wall that ran solidly and straight up three sides of the square pit. On one side there was a gap, like a sewer, about shoulder-width. Lilli threw herself around and tried to get there. Desperately, ignoring all the pain and the cold, she struggled in that direction, reached the wall and her rigid fingers clung to a slightly protruding wall stone. She tried to breathe more calmly.
I can hold on; I’m not going down. I’m holding on.
She repeated the words in her head to calm herself. Something splashed beside her and she saw Constance poking at the water with some kind of pole. Again and again, she poked down, looking for her almost-sister-in-law, who she secretly wanted to kill. And Amon would be next. Surely Constance would use the confusion that was in the castle right now to blame her brother’s death on the evil stranger everyone was looking for.
Lilli pulled her
self up so that she could reach the knot on her handcuffs with her teeth and began to untie it. It wasn’t particularly difficult and soon the rope loosened, and she pulled one hand out, she was free! With one hand she now grabbed the lacing of her dress and untied it, then she looked for a spot on the wall in the channel where there was a slight current, where she could brace her feet on the wall to the right and left. So, she stood between the two walls and had her hands free to pull her wet dress over her head with great effort. Twice she lost her footing and slipped, the current not insignificantly contributing to this. A crash made her collapse. It took her a moment to realise that Constance had closed the grate over her.
Lilli let her dress drift away and clung to the wall. She had to recover and think for a moment, which was difficult because the cold water paralysed her, hurt. Constance had locked her in here, probably assuming that Lilli was either dead or would very soon drown in the cold. She suspected that she was here in a cellar vault or dungeon, in any case under the castle. And there was another problem: she could see nothing, not a hand in front of her eyes, nothing at all.
What was she supposed to do? Follow the sewer? Call for help? That would surely be pointless, for Constance had never chosen a place where she would be heard.
Lilli sobbed softly as she slowly struggled along the wall. She didn’t dare let go of the slippery stones completely, who knew where the current would take her? The water didn’t smell musty and was moving, she suspected that this might be water from the Grauemfall itself, pooling under the castle and then flowing on. Her hand groped further and reached into the void. Frightened, Lilli clawed at the wall again. She was lost, she would never find her way out of here. Images came into her mind. She remembered that Constance had pressed something on her mouth before she reached the door. After that she knew nothing more.
Constance. It had been her, all the time. And Lilli had let herself be fooled by her behaviour like a child. Probably the guards had informed Constance of Lilli’s intended departure and she had felt compelled to strike. Jheron had placed himself in front of her, had wanted to protect her. And she had doubted him! A fatal mistake that Lilli now deeply regretted.
“Jheron, I am sorry. Forgive me,” she whispered.
Lilli tried to get used to the idea of dying here. Immediately everything inside her rebelled. She wanted to live, she loved life! And hers was just beginning for real, while Amon’s was in the greatest danger ... Constance would kill him if Lilli didn’t manage to warn him.
“You have to help me, Jheron. Please.” It was ridiculous, but she didn’t know who else to ask.
A strange feeling took over her senses. She suddenly felt heavy and light at the same time. She heard the water and a soft wind that brushed draftily around the corners. Something in her consciousness tried to warn her to let herself sink into this feeling. The coldness tricked her, wanted to pull her into its embrace, to persuade her that everything would be much easier with her, that all she had to do was let go.
Then she saw an image in front of her. Two boys with black hair who looked very much alike, frolicking side by side through the autumn leaves, climbing trees, fighting each other with sticks.
Lilli forced herself to open her eyes. And froze. The walls shone with a bluish light, the water around them also glowed, but fainter. She could make out everything, every stone, and that she was clinging to the wall at the junction to a larger channel.
“Jheron?” she whispered.
My eyes. Swim.
“What?”
You’re looking through my eyes.
Lilli moved her fingers. They no longer felt quite so cold. And at that moment she didn’t care whether she imagined it or not. She pushed herself off the wall and let herself drift into the sewer. As she did so, she paid close attention to the speed of the flow. If the water was flowing faster, caution was called for. She tried to suppress the fact that she was looking through the eyes of a dead man.
Again, images came up in her and she realised that it was Jheron who sent them to her.
Lilli now knew what to do.
With a splash, she slid out of the wall of rock and immediately sank into the small lake that caught the gushing water. Lilli felt the bottom, pushed off and broke the surface. With two or three swimming strokes she reached the shore. To her right, the lake ran over through a grate in the wall and joined the Grauemfall to plunge into the valley together with it.
Like a slender ghost, she staggered along the path a moment later. The castle was brightly lit, torches had been lit everywhere and Lilli deliberately kept to the shadows, even though she thought she was about to die of cold. Should the search party discover her, they would bring her to Constance with the best of intentions.
Lilli crept barefoot over damp grass and sharp stones, hoping that her white, soaking wet undergarment would not stand out too much in the dark. At that moment, she couldn’t imagine ever getting warm again, ever feeling human again.
She reached Sophia’s lodgings a short time later and when she stumbled into the warmth and saw the servant jump up, Lilli hoped she didn’t collapse before she could explain herself.
“Your Highness!” Sophia rushed towards her and reached out her arms to catch Lilli. “Everyone is looking for you.”
“No one can know I’m here. No one!” Lilli’s legs gave way and Sophia supported her, bringing her closer to the fire.
“What happened, Your Highness? You are cold as death!”
Lilli heard their teeth clashing. It took her a while before she could speak, and while Sophia prepared the bathtub for her and placed a hot bowl of soup in her hand, Lilli began to tell. This time she left nothing out.
The morning was already dawning, and Lilli fell asleep, completely exhausted. Sophia had made a bed for her next to the fire and she only regained consciousness when Sophia shook her gently by the arm.
“Your Highness, forgive me. I must wake you.”
“What is it?” Lilli blinked.
“A messenger has arrived. His Majesty is expected back around noon today. What shall we do?”
Lilli straightened up. She felt as if a carriage had run her over. Twice.
“Where is Florian? I need him. And if you have, something dry to wear.”
A short time later, Lilli was wearing a plain maid’s dress and had holed up in the small chamber where Florian actually slept. She had explained her plan in detail to Sophia. Whether it would work, she didn’t know, but it was the only possibility she could think of. Amon wouldn’t just take her word for it that his sister was a dangerous lunatic. She had gone through all the possibilities; considered writing him a letter or secretly seeking him out. All were risky and equally unpromising.
She waited until Sophia and Florian returned and gave her what she had ordered. Canvas, easel, paints. The picture Lilli had painted of Constance had of course disappeared. Amon’s sister removed the traces and Lilli hoped so much that she would leave Auntie Jahne alone.
Then she covered the opening in the wall that led from Florian’s chamber into the living room and sat down in front of her easel.
Sophia had fetched her another bowl of warm milk, which invigorated Lilli. She was ready.
“I’m waiting, Jheron. Now you can show me everything,” she said.
Soon she began mixing the colours.
Hours later, Sophia reported Amon’s arrival at the castle to her. Before that, she had already sent Florian with a message to Auntie Jahne so that she would not betray herself and Lilli. He told her that Constance had spread the rumour that Lilli had run away against Constance’s advice, after she had told her that she would not allow Lilli to put herself in danger by leaving at night. She had given orders to unsaddle the horses again and by then Lilli had disappeared. Florian also said that the king had initiated another search in the greatest concern.
When Lilli heard this, she had to control herself very much not to run to Amon, fling herself into his arms and tell him everything.
Instead, she pulled herself together and picked up the brush again. It was not until late at night that she went to rest.
A night passed and another day before the three of them set off under cover of darkness. Amon had been searching almost non-stop for Lilli and had driven his men mercilessly. Lilli was about to put an end to this. It had cost her immensely to expose Amon to this worry, but perhaps this way she could save his life. He simply had to believe her, he had to ...
Auntie Jahne was waiting for them at the little-used side entrance through which they planned to enter the castle. It was risky, but Jahne would clear a path for them and make sure they didn’t run into anyone. They had to get into the library, and they were lucky.
Most of the men were out looking for Lilli and the castle lay deserted before them. Jahne had found out that Amon was just planning to extend the radius of the search further. Constance took an active part in these meetings, probably to divert attention from herself. Jahne had reported how concerned she would act, how she pitied Amon and advised benevolently. The thought made Lilli want to throw up.
They made it into the dark library unseen and Sophia and Florian immediately began preparations. The pictures were placed in different places on the shelves and a candle stood in front of each one, illuminating the scene. Lilli had retreated to the back rows of shelves and tried several times to see if it worked as she had thought it would.
Then it was time. She sent Sophia and Florian out of the room and Auntie Jahne set off to find Amon. Lilli had made two plans: one for when Jahne found Amon alone, and one for when Constance was with him.
Lilli’s heart was beating up to her throat as she stood behind the gloomy rows of shelves, little drops falling from her damp hair onto the floor. Her undergarment was also dripping and sticking to her legs.
The Scar-Faced King Page 22