Robin took a deep breath. “I guess I didn’t want to limit myself to any one strategic approach for getting over myself, any one adapt-or-die strategy; that’s why I undertook to travel through the entire DSM-IV, only to find out that it wasn’t mind-expanding enough. I had to push further, into psychic abilities. I availed myself of wisdom coming out of quantum physics; the realization that simply by changing my outlook on the world to one more positive or negative, I could move by shades of gray in these ever-shifting outlooks into alternate realities that corresponded to them, consciously moving across the multi-verse instead of unconsciously.
“What do I want to be? I want to be it all; the trans-human realm abides by none of the limits of the human realm. But I’m also much better at it than I am at the human stuff; and I can’t let that be an excuse for abandoning my humanity. So back to the foot of the mountain I go, and up to the summit I will walk once again.”
“And just how do you plan to do that?” The breath it took to form those words felt like sandpaper against Drew’s throat.
***
Robin stared at Drew across the dining room table, hoping he’d make the connection for himself, save her from having to say it. Evidently, he was in no mood to be so gracious. “Drew, I really need you to forget. Hell, I need to forget all that’s happened of late. It’s the only way to stay sane, to live any kind of normal life.” She could hear just how rattled she sounded in her voice, as much from the latest happenings with Ardel as from everything that had led up to that.
Drew jumped up from the table, paced a bit, before he collapsed onto the sofa, seemingly under the weight of her words’ implications, a need to seek comfort in the plush leather cushions, and maybe to think through his next move.
If she had any sense she’d join him in his defeatism, but she was just too exhausted even for hopelessness, which struck her right now as one more burden she couldn’t carry.
“It’s not like you to do anything but confront your fears. Embrace your demons.”
He was being self-effacing, shifting the focus to her. In the middle of being mad at her, fearful that their own relationship was once again in tatters and his colossal investment of energy in it had proven to be no different than feeding a fire… when the last log was gone, so was the fire. All that he cared about was that she made it through this.
“Robin, if you really want to learn from experience, you need to see how everyone in your life, everyone you draw to you, reflects the truths about yourself you refuse to face. When you do that, own the lessons, and change your behavior accordingly, only then will you be free; and as a bonus you will have proven God exists. You will have shown the extent of God’s love; that He would surround you in a reality designed entirely for your awakening, and with your freedom in mind. Who else but God would have the tireless energy, the abiding love to do such a thing? To say nothing of the imagination.
Drew’s sigh was epic, setting up this punch line: “It’s about cherishing our memories, sifting through them for understanding; it’s not about forgetting.”
Toying with the snow globe on the mantle of the Japanese pagoda on a mountain, tilting it this way and then that, seemed to summon to the surface of her mind the necessary insight. The one that explained why she was ignoring his wise counsel. “After the ordeal with Hartman, and what the self-evolving algorithms did to me, who’d have thought that I’d live to traumatize myself far more than either of them ever could?”
“To climb so high, only to end up at the foot of the mountain again,” he said. He stared vacantly as if through her eyes, as if his empathy were so extreme he’d simply morphed into her in his primitive way. The act was all the more impressive because he didn’t have her chameleon abilities. He was feeling the pain for her as a shaman might, pulling the sickness out of his patient to mitigate her suffering.
She said, “If there’s one thing this last year has taught me, it’s the resilience of the human mind. Given time, it’ll rebound from anything.”
“But Christ, Robin, in all the literature on the saints and sages, there was nothing reported like this, of this magnitude. Your abilities… there is simply no precedent.” Now he seemed to be begging her to hold on for another round. His eyes met hers, pleading.
“We draw on the strength of those who came before us; we build on it. But we have to recognize the importance of the cycle itself, the fact the wheel spins for a reason, taking us from innocent to sage, along every step in between. No matter how high and mighty we get, we have to be willing to be born anew, innocent and clean, and to start anew. Seriana refuses to accept this; she is wrong to hold on to her enlightenment like a shrew her coin purse.”
“Maybe you’re the one who is wrong to recoil in fear.”
She sighed, took her hand off the globe. “Maybe that is what I’m doing. I’m probably too close to the matter to judge it objectively. But my gut tells me this is the right thing to do.”
Drew resorted to pacing again, seemingly to summon the heart-pounding resistance needed to push against her quiet dismissals. He said, “There comes a time when every mountain climber, no matter his unwaning zeal to climb up the mountain, becomes too old and feeble to make it, and he dies somewhere up the mountain.”
“I don’t know how many trips I have in me, Drew. I know I just have to keep trying. It’s who I am.”
He swept the mantle in an act of mock rage; Robin sensed his true feelings ran more to confusion over the best course of action. “Get on with it, then. Scrub our memories. Make us new again.” When his eyes locked on hers, there seemed to be more tenderness in them. “We could stand to focus on the basics for a while, the man and not the superman side of the equation,” he said. “We never did get around to making this relationship much fun. There was just me brow-beating you, and then it was your turn to return the favor. We got so gung-ho about getting over ourselves, we turned what should have been a life lived with elegance and grace into an oppressive burden.”
She took a tentative step closer to him. “I’m glad we agree on that part. I promise you that commitment to become more human will trump the commitment to become more superhuman for the foreseeable future.” Especially since her latest escapade with Ardel had given her all the more reason to embrace forgetfulness.
“Just don’t let your fans hear that.”
This time, Robin’s smile conveyed a lighter mood. The air was already clearing between them with the shift of intention.
Robin used her psychic connection with the obelisk to reset the clock between them in a flash, wondered what the hell else that obelisk was up to, and who else was tapping it for God knows what purposes, before this worry, too, faded with all the others of cosmic import.
The End
AFTERWARD
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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
A book doesn’t get this far down the pike without owing a lot of people a great debt of thanks. I can’t do them all justice here, but I’d like to give a few shout outs to folks without whom it’s hard to imagine this book even being possible. First and foremost, there is my editor in chief, Angela, a remarkable writer in her own right, whose tireless efforts to look at one draft after another helped to greatly transform this tale into the more mature version that it is today. Thanks to you, Angela, it is no longer a child trying to balance on two legs for the first time, but a full-fledged adult version of its former self, so many incarnations ago.
Angela also helped me find some of my other editors, who provided invaluable support, as well, not the least among them, Matt. Matt has his own book he’s working on, so taking time out to put mine under a microscope came at no small sacrifice
to him. Again, Matt, I can’t thank you enough for the catches, big and small.
For spot checking sections of this manuscript relevant to their areas of expertise, I’m also exceedingly grateful to a great many people. Some incredible science fiction writers in their own right weighed in, not the least of them, Rick, Victor, Ken, Patrick, Rhys, R. D., and Dave.
Last but not least, my beta readers, all of whom provided wonderful feedback, are owed a debt of thanks. These include Peter, Floyd, Jordan, and Drew.
REFERENCES
Thanks to www.yelp.com and its many contributors for some of the local atmosphere tidbits pertaining to life on Telegraph Avenue. Also for some of the characterization of Christ Church in Berkeley.
Thanks to http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2011/11/occupy-cal-makes-occupy-history-at-berkeley/248555/ for the facts underlying the Sproul plaza scene depicted in the book.
Thanks to http://www.helensgourmet.com/press.htm. The article was also featured in The Fresno Bee - The Picky Eater. The Picky Eater is written by a Bee staff writer. The writer’s comments were paraphrased to help with Drew’s take on fine eating at The Mandarin Palace.
Thanks to http://occupyoakland.org/2012/04/demonstration-against-chevron-richmond-richmond-bart-station-friday-april-20-2012-500-pm/ for the somewhat anachronistic intel on Chevron which I was able to factor into this story at time of writing (even though the tale itself is set at a somewhat earlier period. If the one percent can halt time in order to prolong their reign, I suppose I can knot the timeline a little.)
http://www.amazon.com/Why-Nations-Fail-Prosperity-ebook/dp/B0058Z4NR8/ref=tmm_kin_title_0?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2. More of Charles C. Mann’s review of Why Nations Fail can be found at the above link, where you can also order the book, like any sensible person. Laura’s Bradford’s lead-in speech essentially quotes Mann.
The 2nd half of Laura Bradford’s lecture is taken from the hardcover review of the book, found here: http://www.amazon.com/Why-Nations-Fail-Origins-Prosperity/dp/0307719219/ref=tmm_hrd_title_0
NOTES
Notes
[←1]
(http://www.imjinscout.com/polk_boys.html - marching tune.) (Ain’t No Use In Looking Down and other wonderful marching military songs can be found at this link: http://www.imjinscout.com/marching_cadences.html)
[←2]
(http://www.republicreport.org/2012/coal-lobby-ows/)
[←3]
entire FDR broadcast can be found here: http://docs.fdrlibrary.marist.edu/050733.html
[←4]
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bashar_al-Assad)
[←5]
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/North_Korea)
[←6]
(some of the wartime memories aboard an aircraft carrier that Mort recounts were inspired by this article.) http://aircraft-carriers.webs.com/lifeonboard.htm
[←7]
(http://ab.mec.edu/departments/techinteg/resources/students/newlife/textile.htm, taken in turn from Lowell National Historical Park Handbook)
[←8]
(http://www.sportpolo.com/spectators/Rules_of_Polo.htm)
[←9]
(http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1891215/posts)
[←10]
Read more about the real world exploits of Davit at: http://www.aaanet.org/committees/cfhr/rptyano5.htm
[←11]
(http://www.anthroprof.org/documents/Docs102/102articles/yanomamo1.pdf)
[←12]
(http://www.survivalinternational.org/tribes/yanomami/intruders)
[←13]
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gold_mining)
[←14]
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0345348656/ref=s9_simh_gw_p14_d0_i1?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-2&pf_rd_r=1A8YC6T2GFJ97CGNMKD8&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=1389517282&pf_rd_i=507846
[←15]
http://www.atpworldtour.com/News/Tennis/2012/04/Features/Nadal-Serve-Forehand-Analysis.aspx
Table of Contents
Notes
Renaissance 2.0: The Entire Series (books 1 thru 5) Page 190