It was so quiet now, at two AM. Such a nice contrast to the noisy day. The party had ended around midnight; early by their usual standards, but they usually didn’t start early in the afternoon like they had today. It’d been a great time. She’d eaten too much, danced and talked and laughed with her friends, and drank a little too much. As soon as her head stopped spinning, she’d go upstairs to the comfort of her air-conditioned room and soft, wide bed.
She leaned over to sip some more water from the large cup at her side and looked around. The deck was littered with paper plates, plastic cups, and empty soda cans and beer bottles. What a mess. They all had their work cut out for them in the morning, but with all of them pitching in, it would get cleaned up quickly.
The sound of the glass door sliding open made her jump. Her head whipped around to see Gavin coming out to the deck.
“Gavin?” she said.
He peered into the dark and spotted her. “Toni, hi. I didn’t know anyone was out here.”
She gestured to the empty lounge chair beside hers. “Join me. It’s a gorgeous night.”
“Aye, it is.” He stretched out on the chair, crossing his long legs at the ankles. Her eyes ran over his body, clad in only a white T-shirt and loose navy shorts. Something pinged in her belly and warmth spread through her veins. The breeze off the ocean ruffled his short hair as he glanced over at her and said, “Truth be told, I’m still a little drunk. Thought getting some air would be good. Why are you out here?”
“I’m still a little drunk, too. I knew I couldn’t go to bed yet, or I’d get sick.”
“Ah. Smart. Getting sick in your bed would be… unpleasant.” His eyes twinkled at her from behind his glasses as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I’ve done that, it’s the worst. ’Cause then you’re so tired, and all you want to do is go to sleep, but ya have to clean up the mess first… which is enough to make ya sick again. So you boak in your bed again, and it’s just an endless nightmare.”
Toni couldn’t help but laugh. “You’ve done that?”
“Aye, I just told ya so, didn’t I?” he grinned. “Did plenty of right stupid things when I was at university.”
“You seem so… grounded. I can’t picture you doing things like that.”
He was quiet for a minute, his eyes on the stars. She didn’t think he’d answer. Then he murmured, so low she almost didn’t hear it over the waves, “Careful, Toni. I just might surprise you.”
Her stomach did a flip. The tone of his voice had her melting inside. More brazen with liquid courage in her, she sat up to stare right at him. “Oh really? How?”
He grinned and shook his head. His hand came up to take off his glasses. Slowly, he cleaned the lenses with the edge of his shirt.
She poked his arm and purred, “You’re a big tease.”
His eyes captured hers. “Not at all. I’m a sure bet.” The corner of his mouth lifted ever so slightly as he added, “I only tease when in bed. But not for too long.”
Her breath caught. Well, hello. “Doctor McKinnon, are you flirting with me?”
“D’ya want me to be?”
“Yes.”
He reached over and put his glasses on the ground, under the chair. His gaze intensified as he sat up to face her, but he said nothing. Their knees touched as they stared into each other’s eyes, and the air around them seemed to crackle with electricity.
“You’re still drunk,” he said quietly.
“So?”
“So in the morning, you might regret anything you say or do right now.”
“I doubt it. You’re a sure bet.” She edged a little closer, her heart pounding in her chest as she licked her suddenly dry lips. She watched his eyes flicker to her mouth before meeting her gaze again. “Besides… I don’t know what you’re thinking of saying or doing.”
His eyes flared, pure blue fire, as he murmured, “Yes, you do.”
Neither of them moved, and their eyes locked. The only sound was that of the waves, crashing rhythmically on the shore out in the darkness. Then, in a swift motion, his hand cupped the back of her neck, pulling her to him, and his mouth pressed onto hers.
He kissed her with such passion that it stole her breath. Her mouth opened to welcome him and their tongues tangled in an erotic dance. His lips were so insistent, so warm, and felt so good… her arms snaked around his neck and she melted into him. But the position was awkward; she shifted, moved, and straddled his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and broad shoulders as she kissed him with no restraint.
He groaned softly into her mouth as his hands slid down her back, holding her tight. They gripped her hips and yanked her closer as his mouth left hers to trail down her throat, scraping her skin with his teeth. His mouth came back to hers and possessed her, consuming her, while his fingers dug into her hips and held. She arched into him, wanting to feel every inch of him against her. He was already rock hard, she could feel him between her thighs, and a rush of powerful lust zipped through her entire body. She ground her hips against his and they both moaned from the delicious friction.
“Sweet lord, I want you,” he whispered roughly against her skin. One of his hands tangled in her hair while the other pressed against her ass, holding her pelvis to his as he rocked against her. “You sexy, beautiful creature…”
She gasped at the feel of him between her legs, then again when his hand left her hair to squeeze and fondle her breast.
“I want you, too,” she said on a sigh. “You have no idea…” She tangled her fingers in his short, soft hair as he kissed and nipped down her neck to her chest.
Through her shirt, he bit her nipple, his mouth hot through the fabric as he suckled one breast, then the other. Her head fell back, the pleasure rippling through her. Mindless, writhing against him, she moaned his name and held on.
Suddenly he lifted his head, breathing heavily. “Toni. Wait. Wait…”
“No.” She grasped his face between her hands and kissed him, deep and demanding. He groaned into her mouth, kissing her back with matching hunger, then tore himself away again.
“Make no mistake,” he panted. “I want you. But… not like this.”
She frowned, confused, also breathless. “Like what?”
“You’re drunk, sweetheart. You said so yourself.” With a slow hand, he brushed her hair back from her eyes, even while his other arm stayed locked around her waist. “I can’t do this. You might regret it in the morning, and that would kill me.”
Her heart still hammering in her chest, the throbbing need between her legs almost unbearable, she looked into his eyes. “I won’t regret it. I’ve been wanting this since the night I met you, Gavin.”
“Christ, I have, too.” She saw the look of wonder in his eyes, a mixture of carnal desire and disbelief that touched her. “Thing is, you’re saying that now. I want to believe you. But, Toni…”
She leaned his forehead against his. “I know I want you.”
“And I want you, too. You don’t know what ya do to me. But I want you sober.” He kissed her lips with such tenderness it made her shiver. “Tell me tomorrow you still want me? And I’m yours. But tonight…” With gentle hands, he pushed her back a bit. “Tonight, I’m not going to let this go further. For your sake.” A wry grin twisted his lips. “Ya think I’m mad, don’t you.”
She shook her head and softly kissed his mouth. “No. I think you’re a really, really good man.” She kissed him again. “A really, really good man that I’m going to jump tomorrow. And have my wild way with you when I prove this isn’t the alcohol talking.”
He stared into her eyes and whispered, “God, I hope that’s true.” His fingers played along her cheek, trailed down the side of her neck. “I won’t come to you, Toni, I’ll leave ya be. You come to me when you’re ready. And if you don’t, that’s all you’ll have to do. I’ll know you simply don’t want this, and that’ll be that. I won’t bring it up again. I don’t want this to get awkward and—”
“Stop.” She k
issed him again, then nipped at his bottom lip. “You’re very gallant, and I appreciate that. Honestly. But now that you opened the door, I’m going to come charging through. You’re hot as hell, I want you, and now that I know you want me too? Be ready for me tomorrow, Doctor McHottie.”
His bright eyes rounded. Then he laughed and kissed her soundly, still cradling her on his lap as he murmured, “Believe me, Toni, I will be.”
Chapter Seven
‡
The next morning, when Toni woke, she was grateful to find she felt fine. She felt a little off, but wasn’t hung over. Her last day off. She’d have to go back to work tomorrow, and was already dreading it. All she wanted… thoughts of Gavin flooded her mind, and the butterflies commandeered her stomach. With a little grin, she rolled over in her bed, curling up with the pillow as she replayed moments from the night before in her head. Kissing him… how he’d touched her… the sound of him groaning with desire echoed deliciously in her ears. God, those stolen minutes had been intense, scorching hot. It wasn’t alcohol making that more than it was; it had been unbelievably hot, off the charts hot. He was… wow. He wanted her like she wanted him. He’d been hiding it well. Now that they’d both admitted to it…
A pleased, excited giggle escaped her. The next move was hers to make. She’d relish every bit of it.
He’d be there for about three more weeks. A summer fling? Game on.
She started to mull over the possibilities, the important fine points. On one hand, was she capable of the kind of emotional disconnect needed to have a short affair? And not end up getting hurt, or inadvertently hurting him? She’d done it in Italy a few years ago, sure. But that was her junior year of college. Then again, she hadn’t really been involved with anyone since Mike. Her boyfriend during her senior year of college had done a hell of a number on her head; even now, the thought of her verbally abusive ex was still enough to make her stomach twist. Since Mike, her longest relationships had lasted a few months at best. She usually managed to self-sabotage them somehow.
And, even if they did discuss a no-strings affair, would Gavin be okay with it? At least she finally knew one thing was for sure: he was no shrinking violet. That strong, quiet, assured, brilliant man had blazing fire inside. Now that she’d caught a glimpse of it, she wanted more. The thought of getting busy with him made her whole body thrum with lust and primal need.
She wasn’t talking about a relationship—she didn’t do relationships. She was just talking about some summer lovin’. She hadn’t slept with anyone in over six months… and dammit, she was a healthy woman with needs and wants like anyone else. Gavin had showed he was just as into it as she was. Thinking further on it, she’d bet he had some pent up need, too, if he hadn’t been with anyone since he and Siobhan broke up. She was all too happy to let him get out those months of sexual tension with her.
After Mike and his damaging head games, she’d sworn not to let any man get too close. Up to now, she’d succeeded in that. So the fact that Doctor McHottie was going back to Ireland on August first was actually a good thing. They’d both know there were ironclad limitations from the start. It could only go so far, really; their time was finite. No one would get hurt.
It made perfect sense to her. Why not? Joe was always saying “YOLO”—“you only live once”. Well, this sweet, sexy gift from Ireland would only be here for a short time. He wanted her, and she wanted him. They were both single, healthy…
A sense of giddy anticipation, the feeling that anything good was possible, shot through her veins with a burst of adrenaline. The mixture of desire, excitement, and nerves that swirled through her body made her laugh. Here she was, overthinking the situation, and for all she knew, Gavin might turn her down. She didn’t think he would, but hey, he’d been a little buzzed last night, too. What if… what if he was the one who had second thoughts this morning? What if the light of day and sobriety had changed his mind?
The thought twisted her insides.
Then she threw back the covers. Only one way to find out. She got out of bed and headed for the shower.
*
Gavin sat with Anna on the back deck, sipping water and watching the waves. He hoped he seemed more cool and collected on the outside than he felt on the inside. He hadn’t slept well the night before. After he’d walked Toni up to her room and gone back to his, he’d tossed and turned for hours. Replaying the time with her in his head, the things she’d said, the feel of her… Christ, the feel of her. Finally, the pent up lust unbearable, he’d just taken care of it himself so he could finally fall asleep.
Now, he felt hazy, a strange mix of wired and tired. His mind hadn’t stopped; even asleep, his dreams had been filled with erotic images of Toni. He couldn’t get her out of his head. He’d slept until eleven, Anna until noon, and Joe and Toni were still sleeping. Wren had gone home with Billy again, so Gavin had been outside by himself, cleaning up the mess from the party, until his sister found him. She helped him finish cleaning, then they sat on two lounge chairs to relax—the same chairs that he and Toni had all but attacked each other on just a few hours before. They talked about the party, and Sean and Cassandra and their big news, while the ocean just beyond surged below a glary, gray sky. The sun danced in and out of the clouds, sometimes shining brightly before getting lost behind the wall of puffy grayness again. Seagulls squawked overhead and swooped in the air before dropping to the beach, scavenging the sand for something to eat.
Glancing at his phone screen, Gavin saw it was almost one o’clock already. “They’re sleepin’ like the dead, those two.”
“They’re fine,” Anna said. She’d only had two cups of coffee and wasn’t fully functional yet. “Joe always sleeps late after a party night. Toni’s probably just taking advantage of her last day off.”
Gavin nodded and squinted back out to the ocean. He just wanted to see Toni again; that was the simple truth of it. And to know what she would do. Did she still want to be with him in the light of day? Or had he been right to stop her last night?
The waiting, the speculating, was eating him alive inside.
The more time he spent with her, the more he wanted her. And not just because she was gorgeous and sexy as hell, but because he genuinely liked her. She made him feel at ease, feel plain good. He basked in the warmth and sunlight of her personality whenever she was near. She made him laugh, she was quick, she was kind, and she just… he huffed out a frustrated exhale and shifted in his chair, rubbing his hands over his slightly stubbled chin. He had to stop acting like an infatuated teen. That’s all this is, an infatuation.
Right. Just caught up in being away and in such close proximity with a lively, fun, smart woman… who had some interests similar to his… with a blinding smile and knockout body… Toni was different from any woman he’d met before. So it was a massive crush, that was all.
But, sweet lord, the way she kissed. Just thinking of it stirred his blood.
“I can feel you thinkin’ from here,” Anna said, peering at him with her big blue eyes. A ray of sun glinted off the tiny silver piercing in her nose as she studied him. “What’s the story, big brother?”
“No story,” he said, crossing one long leg over the other. “Just enjoying the day.”
“You’re so full of it,” she accused.
“What?” He snorted a laugh. “Why do you say that?”
“Because I know ya.” She stared at him harder, about to press forward with her interrogation, when the glass doors slid open behind them. They turned their heads to see Toni coming out to join them, dressed in her favorite pale pink tank dress. She’d obviously just showered; her long curls were still damp and her feet were bare. To him, she looked absolutely delectable.
“Hi, you guys.” She darted a quick glance at Gavin and bit down on her lip, unable to keep from smiling.
His heart expanded in his chest and started to beat faster.
“She’s aliiiiive!” Anna crowed.
Toni laughed wryly. “I am, I
am. Just had a bagel inside. Now I need some more coffee, and I’ll be one hundred percent human again.”
“I’ll get ya some, then,” Gavin offered, rising to his feet. His heart felt lighter just to look at her. “Here, you sit.”
“No, I’ll come back in with you.” Her eyes met his and held, even as she said to Anna over her shoulder, “You want anything?”
“Nah, I’m good.” Anna stretched her arms, then curled up tighter in her plaid blanket. “Actually, I might go back to sleep right here, right now.”
“What time do ya have to be at work?” Gavin asked her.
“Not ’til seven, thank God.” Anna yawned. A warm breeze blew in off the water, caressing all of them. “That feels so nice… aye, I’m just gonna drift in and out here. Don’t mind me.” She pulled her wide-brimmed straw hat down over her face and closed her eyes. “Goodbye, lovelies. See ya in a few hours.”
Toni’s eyes sparkled as she said casually to Gavin, “Well, guess that leaves just us.” She went to the sliding door and shot him a flirty look over her shoulder. “You coming?”
He nodded, suddenly too flooded with excitement to speak. Closing the door behind him, he watched her walk into the kitchen, mesmerized by the sway of her hips and her long hair as she moved. The building anticipation threatened to choke him.
“Is Joe still sleeping?” Toni asked as she set up the Keurig for another cup of coffee. She placed her mug on the little platform.
Gavin cleared his throat, forcing himself to sound as calm and cool as she was. “Aye. He hasn’t come downstairs yet, anyway.”
“And Wren?”
“Stayed at her boyfriend’s place.”
“Aha. Doubt we’ll see her today, then.” Toni hit the button on the machine and turned to him. “So… we’re more or less alone right now?”
His Love Page 6