I turned to look at him and froze. “What do you mean?”
He pointed with his index finger around us, holding his glass in that same hand. “The women. There has to be someone that caught your interest.”
“Not really.”
His eyes widened. “Not really? Why?”
“Somehow, all the girls here are the same. It’s not good enough for me right now.”
“Are you shitting me now? Not good enough?” He leaned toward me, narrowing his eyes. “Don’t tell me. You’re gay. I mean that audience is full of big donors, man.”
I smacked his shoulder. “Are you nuts? Only you can come up with this stuff.” I scratched my chin. “Actually, there is someone.”
“Yeah? Who?”
I couldn’t tell him her name. I could hide her a bit, with giving some truth to it. “I met her in a bar, and now she’s working for a senior congressman.”
“So she’s into politics too?”
“Pretty much.”
I didn’t like how he looked at me. He was studying me. Like he knew. Shit, had Camilla told him about her new job?
“What?”
“Was she a good lay?”
My lips stretched into a huge smile. “Yeah.”
“So are you two a thing now?”
“No, of course not,” I said defensively. A little bit too defensively.
“So you’ve banged her and that was it? Au revoir? Arrivederci?”
My response came several seconds later. “Something like that.” I didn’t know why I couldn’t just tell him that I couldn’t stop thinking about her. Maybe because it was all new for me, and I had no idea what to say. Or maybe because I was worried he would figure me out.
“I see.” He put his glass on the table. “I’m catching on to something.”
“What?” Shit. This wasn’t going to be good.
“I think this thing between this chick and you is more serious than you’re saying.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Yeah, right. And I’m Batman.”
“It’s not, really.” He didn’t believe me at all. I exhaled a long sigh, running my hand through my hair. “Fine. Actually, it’s complicated. At first, she wasn’t interested in me. She rejected me, can you imagine that?”
He burst into laughter. “No way. Wait is this the girl from the other night?”
“Yep.”
“Now I have to meet this girl and give her a medal. Seriously. She rejected you and you still went after her again?” He clapped. “Amazing.”
“Yeah, yeah. Anyway, to cut a long story short, she decided she was interested in me and we ended up in a hotel room.”
“Nice.”
“And then I saw her at my work, and we fucked again, but the problem is that I can’t stop thinking about her. I haven’t seen her for days, and I feel like a kid that got his fucking candy taken away from him. I need to see her.” I finished my drink in one swallow. “You know me. I don’t do relationships. So what the hell is happening to me?”
Carter was staring at me for a long time, surprise on his face giving way to delight.
“Wow. Just wow. You, my friend, are completely in love with her.”
I whipped my head at him. “What? No.”
His smile grew huge. “Yes, you are. Look at you. Going all panicky because you have no clue what is happening to you. You haven’t felt this way before, so now that the big, bad Merritt is finally tamed, you have no clue what to do.”
“Since when you’ve become a psychiatrist? It’s not like that.”
“Keep denying and maybe it will become the truth one day. Look, you should go to her and actually try to date her.”
“Date her?”
“Don’t act so shocked.”
Yes, I was shocked alright. I was shocked by the idea of dating someone. I had just told him I didn’t do relationships but…
I looked at my empty glass, feeling like I was on the verge of reaching an important realization. I really did feel something for Camilla. I could deny it all I wanted, but my feelings wouldn’t go away. And the most surprising part? The thought of dating Camilla didn’t repel me at all.
“Since you obviously care about her, it’s only logical for you to be with her. So what do you say?”
“I…” I clamped my mouth shut, bewildered.
Yes. I wanted to be with her and I wanted to make it work. Only thinking about Camilla being my girlfriend made me unbelievably happy.
And just like that, everything became clearer to me. How didn’t I think of this before?
“You’re right.” I met his gaze. “I should try to date her.” I mean he had practically just given me his blessing, even if he didn’t realize it.
His grin matched mine. “That’s my man. If you two get married, I want your kid named after me.”
I smacked his shoulder again and snorted. “Nice try.” If we did get married he’d be my best man, if he didn’t kill me first.
He rolled his eyes. “They all say that, and before you know it, they are tying the knot and producing babies like there’s no tomorrow.”
I scowled at him. “You’re definitely on some drugs, man.”
“So? What are you waiting for? Call her and invite her to some quiet place where you can be all lovey-dovey and shit. Tell her how you feel about her and that you want to be with her.”
“Yes, Dad.”
“You’re razzing me now, but you’re going to be thanking me later.”
I reached for my phone in the pocket, but then I realized one thing. Great. “I don’t even have her number.”
The look he gave me was that of incredulity. “Good job, Romeo. Absolutely perfect. So you’re seeing this chick, but you don’t even have her number? Way to go.”
“Shut it.”
“So what are you going to do?”
I rubbed my chin, staring into the distance as I thought about my next step. I heard that she was coming to work earlier than usual, which I could use to my advantage. We would have some privacy and more time to talk.
“I’ll make sure to see her tomorrow morning at work. I’ll tell her how I feel then.”
He nodded. “It’s a good plan. Now, I guess we have to make a toast.” He signaled to the waiter to bring us new drinks.
“Toast for what?”
His smile was blinding. “For the playboy Merritt finally being conquered.”
The next morning, I made a point to run into her, coming to her office with a cup of coffee. The office was empty at this time, the silence somehow making me more tense.
I frowned and looked at my hand that was slightly sweaty. What the fuck?
I never get nervous with women. I’m always composed. In control. Hell, I never felt anything to be nervous about. But now, as I waited for her to arrive, I was unusually nervous, and my heart was racing like I running a marathon.
I fisted my hand and closed my eyes, leaning further into the chair. I’d spent the half of night thinking about what I could say to her, going through various possibilities. And for the first time ever, I was afraid of being rejected. That possibility brought a strange sensation to my chest that I didn’t like at all.
No. She would be with me. She had to.
I kept glancing at the clock on the wall, tapping my foot on the floor in rising anxiety.
Calm down, Merritt. You’re being ridiculous. It’s gonna be alright.
Just when I thought that maybe she wouldn’t come earlier but at a regular time, standing up to go, the doors of her office opened and Camilla entered. Immediately, my heart rate accelerated and my mouth went dry just looking at her.
She was wearing a jacket and a pencil skirt that went above her knees, and I let my gaze slide slowly down and up her sexy legs. Her hair was now falling down in beautiful waves, a cute flowery hairpin matching the flowery necklace she wore around her slender neck.
Needless to say, I had an instant hard-on.
She didn’t notice me right away sinc
e she was looking at the ground, seemingly deep in thoughts as she walked to her desk, but then she jerked her head toward me, finally spotting me in the room.
She gasped, pressing her hand across her chest. “You scared me,” she breathed out.
I smirked at her and approached her. “Sorry about that. It’s good to see you.”
She didn’t respond right away, just looking at me, surprise written all over her face.
“Merritt, what are you doing here?”
I raised the cup of coffee I was holding in my hand. “I brought you a coffee.”
She stepped back, blushing. “You brought me a coffee? You came here to bring me a coffee?”
“No. I didn’t come here only because of that.” I lowered the cup on her desk and closed the distance between us, my fingers itching to touch her. And I did just that. I cupped her cheek and leaned closer until only inches separated our faces. “I came here because I wanted to see you, Camilla. I missed you. I missed you so goddamned much.”
Her eyes filled with desire, her teeth biting into her lower lip. The warmth her body radiated pulled me in, and I slid my hand down to her neck, enclosing it with my fingers around it gently. I lowered my head, dying to kiss her, but then she did something unexpected.
She pushed me away.
10
Camilla
I yawned and headed across the hall to my office, battling with fatigue. I had made it a point to arrive to the office earlier each day because I wanted to show the Congressman I was fully dedicated to my job. The building was almost empty besides the security and early comers like me. I knew I wouldn’t find anyone in my office because I was always the first to arrive.
I had a fun time on my job because I was able to learn a lot just by being here and meeting with various people. Megan told me that if everything went well, my boss would allow me to attend meetings soon, and I couldn’t wait for it.
I had met many people who found politics tedious and couldn’t understand the rush I felt when I thought about creating laws, bills, and other regulations, but then again, only the people with a true passion for politics could understand how fascinating and thrilling it could be. Working here helped me unleash my passion and do what I knew best.
Last night, I went out for dinner with Sierra and after that we went to a bar. I finally told her about Merritt and my decision to stop seeing him, and she agreed that it was for the best.
“He’s hot and all, but you worked so hard to lose everything just because of a guy. Besides, you don’t know if he’s serious about you or not. What if he’s just having fun until he dumps you and goes on with his life?”
“Wow, Sierra. You’re brutally honest.”
She shrugged her shoulders. “But that’s the truth.”
“Yeah. That’s why I won’t see him again.”
Sierra wanted us to drink to being single and free, and soon one drink turned into many until it was way past midnight.
I resisted rubbing my eyes, so I wouldn’t smear my makeup and yawned again. Today was going to be rough. I was already feeling like a zombie.
I entered my office and continued toward my desk, thinking how I should try to take a nap during lunch time, when I sensed someone in the office, and I gasped. There wasn’t supposed to be anyone here at this time…
My gaze met Merritt’s and my heart went haywire. “You scared me.”
I pressed my hand over my heart, surprised to see him waiting for me in my office. What was he doing here?
He smirked and moved toward me. “Sorry about that. It’s good to see you.”
My body responded to his presence, warmth surging through me. He was clean-shaven, his hair stylishly slicked back, and the scent of his cologne engulfed me. He was strikingly handsome. As usual.
Even though I had made a decision to stay away from him, I couldn’t help but get attracted to him. This wasn’t good at all.
“Merritt, what are you doing here?”
He raised the cup of coffee in his hand, drawing my attention to it. “I brought you a coffee.”
I took a step back. Now this was even more surprising. I was blushing, embarrassed by his semi grand gesture. He had actually come to see me and brought me a cup of coffee. Who would have thought?
“You brought me a coffee? You came here to bring me a coffee?”
“No. I didn’t come here only because of that.”
He left the cup on my desk and stopped right in front of me, messing with my breathing and my mind. He looked too good, and I felt the need to run my fingers over his cheek and angular jaw. I curled my hand into a fist so I wouldn’t actually do that.
He surprised me when he touched my cheek and lowered his head. I could feel his breath tickling my lips, and for a moment I was dazed. For a moment, I imagined erasing the last inches of the distance between us and kissing those sexy lips.
“I came here because I wanted to see you, Camilla. I missed you. I missed you so goddamned much.”
I let out a breath I had been holding and bit into my lower lip, my insides stirring with desire. He was so close and all I could think about was pressing my lips on his and losing myself in him. This reminded me of the moment we shared in the closet when he looked at me with his tender eyes that spoke volumes of his feelings.
He brought his hand to my neck and wrapped his fingers around it. I was sure he could feel my erratic pulse. He inclined his head toward me, about to kiss me, and for a moment, I was inching closer to him too.
But then my voice of reason finally managed to push through the fog of lust. This was wrong. We couldn’t be kissing here. Not now.
I pushed him away. My body, a traitor, wasn’t happy with this at all.
“No. We can’t do this now. You have to go now.”
He frowned. “Why?”
I glanced at the door, knowing it was only a matter of time before someone came inside and saw us like this. I would be faced with countless rumors by lunch, and then no one would believe me there wasn’t anything between Merritt and me.
I rushed him out of the office.
“What are you doing, Camilla?” he asked me, twisting around to look at me as I pushed him forward. I didn’t respond to him, looking down the hallway to see if there was anyone, but it was empty.
“We can’t talk here. Follow me.”
Without waiting for his answer, I headed to the end of the hall where we could stay hidden from any potential onlookers. He was right behind me.
“Look, you can’t be in my office and you absolutely can’t kiss me there.”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “Why not?”
“Why not? Are you serious?”
“Yes. You wanted to kiss me too, so what gives?”
“I can’t believe you! What if someone saw us? Think about this. They would start rumors, and the rumors would eventually reach my boss. And he will be so pissed if he finds out that we’re sleeping together.”
He uncrossed his arms and frowned, not saying a word.
“Don’t you understand how important my job is for me? I can’t risk losing it, and that’s exactly what would happen if the Congressman found out. I would lose everything I have, and I can’t let that happen. Not to mention Carter! Jesus, he’d freak.”
I placed my hand on his shoulder. “I appreciate your help in getting my job, I really do, but we can’t keep seeing each other. I’m sorry, Merritt.”
“So this is it between us?”
“Yes. We’re going to have to cool things off for a while. I…” I glanced away, taking a deep breath, and dropped my hand from his shoulder.
“I feel great being with you. I won’t deny that. And yes, I wanted to kiss you back in my office and do so much more than that, but I can’t let my emotions ruin something I’ve wanted my whole life. I can’t have you and my job at the same time, so I have to make this choice. I hope you can understand this. Please, understand it.”
Something heavy settled in my stomach as I returned his
serious gaze. Now that I had said this, I wished things could be different. Maybe if he hadn’t been a congressman... Maybe if I hadn’t worked here but somewhere else… Maybe if Carter didn’t also work on the Hill…
After a couple of moments, he nodded and smirked. “Yes. I understand. I mean, I’m disappointed because I wanted to ask you to go out with me, but I understand because I’d feel the same. I wouldn’t let my private life destroy my career. So I won’t pressure you.”
Wait. He wanted to ask me to go out with him? Oh lord help me.
My chest was tight with emotions as I tried to figure out what was going on, but the imminent joy from his words dissipated when he backed away.
I was supposed to feel relieved that he wasn’t to make a big deal about this, but I didn’t feel relieved. I felt cold. I felt like I’d made a colossal mistake, which wasn’t fair. This job was important to me. I couldn’t compromise this for Merritt or anyone else.
But why did it have to be so complicated? It was supposed to be just sex and nothing serious. He wasn’t serious about me, right?
“I don’t want to create a problem for you, so I won’t be searching you out again.” He offered me a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
“So are we okay?”
“Yeah. We’re fine.” Why didn’t that sound convincing? “You’re smart and hard-working, and I’m sure you’re going to go places, Cami. I wish you all the best. Goodbye.”
Smiling at me in a way that screamed “fake”, he turned around and walked away, and I couldn’t do anything but watch his back as various emotions went through me.
And I realized that he wasn’t okay with this at all. He was actually sad that I wouldn’t go out with him, and the revelation rooted me to my spot.
He cared about me, just like I cared about him.
I headed back to my office, feeling unusually defeated. I couldn’t lie to myself and pretend I was okay with not being able to see him again. I was so close to succumbing to him and his kiss, and a big part of me regretted not doing what my heart obviously wanted.
Was I making the right choice? Choosing my career over him?
I groaned when I entered my office and Megan turned to face me. “There you are. I saw your bag on your desk when I got here, but you were nowhere to be found.” She tilted her head to the side, noticing my distress. “Is everything alright?”
Say Yes, Senator: A Best Friend's Little Sister Political Romance Page 6