"We have to talk," he said. "Now!"
"I don't want to talk," Jill was almost screaming with pain and frustration and anger. "Go away. We can talk later."
"No!" he barked, pushing her into the bedroom and shutting the door behind them. "No way. No more laters. Every time I've wanted to talk to you, I've had to wait until later. Not this time. This time it's going to be right now. Now tell me why you said you hate me. Why, Roo? Tell me," he persisted, and it was finally enough to cause Jill's resistance to snap.
"Why?" she shot at him. "Why! Because you destroyed the most precious memory I had, the memory of our one night together. Because you told me that you just used me, unsuccessfully apparently, to try and forget Rachel. That's why, and that's why you're a prick. Now let me go."
"Used you to forget Rachel?" he demanded angrily. "What on earth are you talking about?"
"This morning," Jill intoned dully. "You said you'd tried to be interested in other women but you couldn't forget Rachel. You made love to me that night in my flat, but all the time you were wishing I was Rachel. No wonder you left so quickly and didn't bother getting in touch again."
"Is that what you think?" he demanded. "Do you honestly think that night meant nothing to me?"
"Well, obviously it didn't," Jill answered, unable to hide the pain in her eyes. "I know you must think me a stupid little fool, but I thought that night was something special. I loved you, and though I knew you didn't love me, that night was the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me, and then you spoilt it by telling me that you didn't even care about me at all, that you just wanted to forget for a while how much you loved Rachel."
Then the strangest thing happened. Jill felt herself swept into Michael's strong arms and his lips pressed hard against hers, and then he was kissing her all over her face and hair.
"Oh, my baby," she heard with disbelief. "My poor sweet naughty girl. I never loved Rachel. It was always you, you little witch. You cast a spell over me years ago, about the first time I spanked you, maybe even before, but I never fully realized until last Christmas when Vicky and I picked you up from the bus stop. It was you I was trying to unsuccessfully forget. I've loved you for years, and every time I'm with you, I just want to take you in my arms and make love to you over and over again."
"But I don't understand," Jill stammered, unwilling to believe that happiness could be hers for fear it might yet be cruelly snatched away again. "Why, then, were you so angry with me when Rachel got hurt at the barbecue? I thought you hated me because I'd endangered the woman you loved."
"I didn't hate you, and I was angry that the woman I loved had been in danger, but it wasn't Rachel—it was you. I was so terrified when I saw that horse rear up at you that I nearly lost my head. I wanted to snatch you into my arms, but I couldn't, and when I saw you looking so miserable afterwards I had to get away from you or reveal how I truly felt. I stayed away as long as I could, but when I saw you over at Longroh's, I couldn't keep away from you any longer. We came home together, remember? I wanted to tell you then, but then Mum fainted and I didn't get the chance."
"But why didn't you tell me? Didn't you know how much I loved you?"
"I really wasn't sure, and besides what could I offer you? I thought it was bright lights and excitement you wanted, not this dusty old place, miles from anywhere. The first night you were here, you told me you were happy living in the city, and how important your job was to you and everything. I decided then that I had no chance of winning you, and I tried to keep away from you, I really did, but I just couldn't do it. I decided that whatever your answer was I would tell you how I felt on New Year's Eve. I was going to ask you to come in the ute with me, but then I found you in Tim's arms and I was so mad I just went and fetched Rachel."
"I was so hoping you'd take me," she whispered remembering the pain of that evening.
"Oh, I wanted to." He kissed her again. "Even later, I decided I would still tell you rather than let you go without knowing that I loved you, but when I went looking for you, I overheard you accept Tim's proposal of marriage. I went straight inside and proposed to Rachel."
"Oh, Michael, Tim never proposed to me. I told him that night that I wanted nothing from him but friendship. That's what you overheard. And I was trying to tell you that I loved you too that night. I even followed you and Rachel outside. I saw you spank her, and then I followed you inside. When I kissed you at midnight, I was going to tell you then, but then Rachel announced your engagement and I just had to get away as quickly as possible, so I got Tim to take me back to Melbourne the next day."
"You saw me spank Rachel that night?" Michael asked with surprise.
"Yes," she whispered. "I hated it. I wanted it to be me. And you'd said you hadn't spanked her before but you imagined her husband would. When I saw you spanking her, I was so afraid. That's why I tried to talk to you as soon as we got back to the hall, but it was too late."
"Oh, my poor sweet girl," Michael gathered her in his arms, holding her tight against his chest. "It was the only time I ever did spank her. That was just me trying to forget you. I love to spank you." He pulled back a little and grinned at her, setting off the colour in her cheeks. "You know I do. But I didn't enjoy it with her at all. Yours is the only arse I ever want to feel under my hand. I never loved Rachel, honestly, Roo."
"And I've never loved anyone but you. I've never made love with anyone else either. I tried so hard to convince you that Tim and I weren't lovers."
"I know," he said gently. "I was a fool to think Tim was your lover. I knew I was the first the night I made love to you, and it just made me love you even more. I'd tried so hard to forget you, but I just couldn't. I knew I couldn't enter into a loveless sham of a marriage with Rachel, not once I knew what it really meant to love someone, so I called the engagement off, but still I couldn't get you out of my mind. It was driving me crazy, and in the end, I made some excuse to go to Melbourne to see you. I thought that maybe if I saw you again, maybe even made love to you, it would get you out of my system, but it just made it worse."
"Why were you so angry and distant when I came back this time, then?" Jill asked, still not quite able to fit the pieces of the jigsaw together. "You've been avoiding me, and you've been so unfriendly. I thought you must have been afraid I might throw myself at you."
"If only you had! I just couldn't stand being near you and not being able to hold you like this."
"But why couldn't you?" Jill's face showed she was still bemused.
"You just don't understand, do you? Every time I saw you, I wanted you—but I wanted you too much. Not just for an hour, or even a night, but for always, and I honestly believed that you wouldn't be happy here. I thought that even if I could get you to marry me, you'd just wind up hating me for having trapped you here. And what about your career? I didn't think there was any way you would ever give up your photography."
"But I love River Gums! Even if I didn't love you," Jill cried. "This is the only place I ever really feel as though I am home. I've always wanted to live here, but I thought it would never be possible, so I pretended to prefer the city. But it's here I love. I would never take another photo as long as I lived if that was the price for being here, but it's not. Sure, I'd have to leave my job at the newspaper, but I can take photographs anywhere."
"You mean that?" he asked roughly. "You could be happy here?"
"Oh, yes! I could live here forever, but," she looked at him anxiously "I thought you thought I was a useless city slicker and not much use on a farm."
"Well, maybe I did a bit," Michael admitted, "but I was wrong. You rode that horse today, and mustered those sheep as though you've been doing it all your life. Watching you out there, I knew that it wouldn't matter what I did, I could never stop loving you, and that right here with me is where you belong. I love you, my darling naughty girl. You do love me too, don't you?"
"Of course I do. I always have," Jill answered simply, still not really believing that her most precious
wish, her heart's desire, was finally coming true.
"And you'll marry me and live with me here at River Gums?"
"Yes, my darling. Yes!"
"I'm going to keep spanking you though, you know. If you marry me, I'll expect you to submit to me whenever I think you deserve to be spanked. And I think you deserve it right now—you still haven't had a proper spanking for calling me a prick, and I warned you last time that if you did it again, you would be spanked harder next time."
Jill felt Michael's body tense as he waited for her answer. This was the final test of their love and the promise of happiness together. Without flinching, she walked to her dressing table, picked up a hairbrush and, returning to Michael, handed it to him.
"I want you to spank me, Michael," she said solemnly. "Now and forever. I wouldn't want it any other way."
"It will hurt," he warned her gently, but she looked lovingly into his eyes.
"I know," she said steadily.
He sat on the bed and called her to him. With a slight trepidation as to how she would cope with the as yet unfelt hairbrush chastising her bottom but determined to demonstrate her desire to submit, Jill stood next to him.
"Take them down," he ordered, indicating her pants, and she obeyed. This time as she stood semi-naked before him, waiting to be taken over his knee, her heart pounded not with anger, but with love and excitement. No matter how he stung her bottom, she loved to be in his power like this. Settling herself into position, she allowed him to move her so her bottom was high and she arched her back to offer it still more.
"Do you know why I'm going to spank you now, Roo?" he asked gruffly.
"Because I called you a prick and because I ran away from you earlier and then downstairs."
"Anything else?"
"Yes, Sir," she sighed happily. "Because you love me."
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Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
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