“No.” LiLi crossed her hands over her chest, her head down and her lip quivering. “You said you were taking me home. I want Mommy. Now,” she demanded, verging on tears.
“Should we call her?” he asked, one hand on the wheel and the other reaching for his cell phone.
All he got for an answer was a stream of tears down the saddest face. Zack would’ve pulled over right then and there if he knew for sure hugging LiLi wouldn’t frighten her. He dialed the number at the hotel instead, certain the time difference meant nothing to the woman he loved.
Connor answered. “Hey Zack, what’s up?”
“Is Mei still awake?”
“Ah, yeah. I think so. She was just feeding your little girl.”
Ah, how Zack loved the sound of that–his little girl.
“Can you put her on the phone?”
“Hold on. Here she is.”
Zack listened while the phone was handed off to Mei. His heart swelled at the sweet torture he would shortly put her through, but it was nothing compared to what she’d already endured.
“Zack?” She got right to the point. “When are you coming home?”
He smiled at the unspoken command behind her question. We should be looking for LiLi. Why aren’t we?
“I am, but there’s someone who needs to talk with you first.” Without another word, he pulled to the side of the road and handed the phone to LiLi.
She placed it to her ear. “Mommy?”
He heard Mei’s shriek through the phone.
“It’s me, Mommy,” LiLi bawled. “I wanna come home.”
Zack groaned through his tears while mother and daughter cried, squealed, and spoke to each other for the first time in too many weeks. When LiLi hiccupped with sobs, he undid her seat belt and she scrambled onto his lap, her poor little body racked with the happiest cries.
“Mommy wants to talk to you,” she said very seriously as she held the cell phone to his ear, her face drenched and her arm around his neck. “She says you’re her best friend and you’ll take good care of me. Here. Talk.”
“Mei?” he asked, surprised he could find his voice. Half of him wanted to chuckle at LiLi’s authoritarian demeanor, the other half wanted to cry for the joy Mei must be going through.
“Zack?” she choked, and that was the end of the conversation. She couldn’t speak. Neither could he.
Finally he ground out, “I love you, Mei. Stop worrying. We’re on our way.”
“Hurry home,” she whispered. “I love you so—”
LiLi pulled the phone away. “I wanna talk to my Mommy.”
Zack would’ve laughed if he could’ve, but his heart was full. How he wished he were home, holding the matching bookend to this darling tyrant. He pitied Connor and Rory. Mei would be energized now and a bear to live with until LiLi was back in her arms.
Out of sheer satisfaction, he hummed an old-fashioned rendition of ’Twas the Night Before Christmas, by Clement C. Moore. Mei was about to receive the only gift that truly mattered, the purest reason for Christmas in the first place–the unconditional love of a child. He pressed his new daughter to his heart and wiped his eyes.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!
EPILOGUE
Zack tucked sleeping LiLi into her bed while Mei pulled Song’s pink tights off, changed her diaper, and snuggled the baby into her blankets. Rambunctious Song was a different child now. She could climb like a monkey, so her baby bed had been traded for a toddler-sized bed, and both were in LiLi’s room. Not for long. Soon those beds would be in another home across the river in Pennsylvania. Moving would begin within the week. He couldn’t wait.
Alex had insisted they stay at the hotel for as long as they needed. It made sense, but with his upcoming nuptials to Mei in less than a week, Zack was energized like never before. His girls and their mother deserved the best. He intended to deliver.
While their new home boasted marble countertops in the kitchen, crown-molding throughout, walk-in closets, and five bathrooms, it was the fenced-in backyard and the very real possibility of a big dog in their future that sealed the deal. David Tao had volunteered to help install a state of the art security system when he returned home from Disneyland. Harley promised he’d help train the dog, and there would be no more sleepless nights for any of his girls–ever. When Zack paused at the door to watch his daughters, Mei’s hand snaked around his waist.
“I think we wore them out today,” she whispered. “Song didn’t make a peep when I laid her down.”
“Neither did LiLi.” He wrapped his arm around his wife-to-be, burying his nose in the soft fragrance of her hair. “What would you say if these little gals came with us on our honeymoon?”
This was not one of those moments when he had no clue what Mei was thinking. The way her eyes lit up was answer enough.
“It’s just that LiLi isn’t ready for time away from you, and—”
“And you aren’t ready for time away from Song.”
“And you aren’t ready for time away from LiLi.” Zack completed the circle.
He loved that Mei could read him like a book. The power of this woman had transformed him from a mindless playboy whose biggest problem away from the office was how many magnums of wine to pick up for the ladies and how many fifths of Jack for Jake. His life outside work had been one continual party, but he didn’t miss it. Even his prize possession had fallen out of first place and would soon share their new heated garage. Who would have guessed he’d ever own something as mundane as a family van? He almost felt like David Tao. Almost.
Mei’s hand on his chest drew his attention away from the girls. “I ordered pizza,” she said. “Are you hungry?”
She took care of him, another thing he loved. Most of the other women he’d known wanted something, but all she’d ever wanted was her life and child back. And him.
“When will it be here?” he asked, his lips tasting the side of her very delectable and pretty face. With the girls tucked in bed, the possibilities were endless. Making love with Mei had become an insatiable appetite. Just the thought of a few stolen moments triggered his attention. It didn’t happen often enough.
“Forty-five minutes.” Mei turned to face him, her hands still on his chest and her happy heart in her eyes.
Hagatha had disappeared. Zack understood how the instinct to protect a child could transform the softest woman into the fiercest fighting machine. He felt the same way about all of his girls.
“That gives me enough time.” Zack stooped low enough to lift Mei off her feet and into his arms. She came easily, her head soft against his chest and her arm around his neck. Ah, the gentle weight of a good woman enticed and pleased him to his core. The fire that glowed in her eyes glittered brightly. His woman was content. Nothing better in the world.
She trailed tender kisses up his neck and into the sensitive spot on his neck. Mei knew him too well. One tickle from the very tip of her index finger on his ear and he shivered. His damned ears seemed to be connected to his groin. How the hell did that work?
“Now?” she asked, her best innocent face on and seduction in her deep brown eyes.
He nodded. No words would be needed for the next forty-five minutes. He angled the love of his life through their bedroom door and toed it shut. Somehow, they’d find room and time for each other on their honeymoon without excluding their children. The day would come when they might take off for a weekend by themselves, but it was not this day.
Not yet.
THE END
A Hint of Things to Come…
Harley meant to go home. Really, he did, but for some reason his victory-red Jeep pulled into long-term parking at Reagan National Airport instead. It’s not like anyone was waiting for him at home, anyway. Yeah, he could always head over to Alex and Kelsey’s to wrestle with their dogs, Whisper and Smoke. Kelsey would feed him. He could hang out for a while, but for two weeks?
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...<
br />
Jet lag plagued him, but more than sleep, Harley wanted companionship. He wanted the feeling of someone special waiting for him, watching for him, maybe even wishing he was already there with them–wherever that was. And if she couldn’t be waiting for him, at least he wanted to know she’d be back soon, that she’d left a note on the counter, and that she was happy to be part of his everyday life. He knew a pretty little redhead who did those kinds of things. They might not seem like much to most folks. Suddenly, they seemed like everything.
The courage to change the things I can...
So he bought a ticket to the Mid-western state of Wisconsin, and his long distance girlfriend, Judy O’Brien. He’d placed a quick call from the ticket counter just to be sure. Since she’d first introduced herself at Mark and Libby’s wedding, she and Harley had maintained an on and off again relationship of sorts. She was a registered nurse with a full time career, and he was overseas a lot on assignments. All their time apart had made it tough to really get to know each other. So much for good intentions.
And the wisdom to know the difference would sure be nice, too.
Yes, she’d be off at midnight. Yes, she could get more time off if she needed it. A week or two? Yes, she’d see what she could do. When would his flight get in, and did he need a ride from the airport? She’d be there. Fly safe.
With that settled, he relaxed. The irony of flying home from one of the world’s most dangerous countries to nearly die in the land of the free did not escape him. Daniel Peters was right. Post traumatic stress disorder had wreaked havoc in Harley’s life. He was one of those guys, the loser kind, who’d been in too many clinics and rehab centers to count, the kind who protected himself at all cost. Some days he was a waste of skin. Other days he managed. It was a daily struggle. Most days he could deal. Not today.
Those other words Peters threw at him before the shooting bugged him. What did he mean? Sole survivor? Harley knew he’d been injured in an IED explosion in Iraq. That much was obvious, but the sole survivor bit? No way. That implied others died. He’d remember them, wouldn’t he? He pushed the thought away as usual. Too many holes in his memory still haunted, holes he couldn’t explain much less fill. Someday he’d have to break down and read the Army’s incident report to find out what really happened, but not now. No need to go looking for trouble.
The mantra began again. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...
The airport was full of couples and families rushing by with all their noisy chatter and laughter. Husbands kissed pretty wives they’d missed on business trips. Happy little children skipped and danced around fathers come home from wherever they’d been. For the first time since he’d stuck himself in that Texas Rehab and thought he was cured of all his torments and addictions, Harley wasn’t happy. The bliss of others pointed out the lack of it in his life. He wanted more than a twelve-step program.
The courage to change the things I can...
Something was missing, and it wasn’t drugs, booze, or even the camaraderie of dogs. No. Ever since Mark had married Libby, and especially now that she was pregnant, Harley had grown more dissatisfied with himself. Life was slipping away. He hated to admit it because it sounded dumb, but it seemed like his biological clock was running out on him.
Heck, all my clocks are running out on me.
A shudder slinked across his shoulders, like a sick old friend who wouldn’t die. Too many ghosts haunted him. They always would. He pushed them back and faced the truth.
I want Judy.
With luxurious copper-colored hair and soft emerald eyes, Judy was a strikingly beautiful woman, but she was also intelligent and practical, a take-charge kind of woman who supervised other nurses and care-providers at the clinic where she worked. It was no wonder she’d taken the first step in their relationship when she’d asked him to dance. He’d never have done it. Anyone could see she deserved better.
He wandered through the concourse, his mind a thousand miles away. She wasn’t so much intimidating, although Harley was sometimes intimidated. She knew what she wanted, and she wasn’t afraid to go after it. And it’s not like he was afraid of her. Overwhelmed was more like it. Overwhelmed by her beauty, brains, and her love for him. Sometimes all that strength and confidence was more than he could handle.
How could a woman like her really love a messed-up man like him? And yet he’d told her everything, about all the drugs, every needle he’d ever stuck in his arm, everything he’d ever stuck up his nose, and every rehab in between. He’d told her how he’d trashed his parents’ lives until they hated the sight of him, and about those other women too. She knew him inside out. All he had to offer her was the truth, so he did. She still loved him. Go figure.
And I miss her.
When he looked up from his wanderings, he was standing in front of a jewelry store, an eclectic little tourist trap with baubles and bangles galore. The clerk had red hair. He entered, in case that was a good omen for a lost man like him. The case of glittering gems and jewels beckoned.
Wow. So many choices. What the heck would Judy like?
An interesting item caught his eye, a ring with something called a chocolate diamond. The clerk was beside herself, telling him everything he didn’t care about anyway. It did have an interesting fire to it, though.
Does Judy like chocolate? Most women do, don’t they? Kelsey does. Libby, too. Heck, I should know something like that about my girlfriend, shouldn’t I?
Still, it was a nice fourteen-carat, rose-gold band with a round cut, quarter-carat chocolate stone surrounded by a circle of smaller, brilliant white diamonds. The white made the chocolate look darker. He did something almost as impulsive as the time he’d committed himself to that Texas Rehab.
Heck. That turned out to be a good decision, didn’t it?
He bought the ring.
And then he waited for the jet that would fly him to the Midwest to arrive and refuel. Then he waited for the passengers in first class seating to board. At last he was in the air. He dozed away some of his jet lag until the wintery checkered landscape below identified he was back in the dairy state. The weak winter sun cast a golden glow across the Styrofoam-like snow.
I have not been a good friend. I will admit my faults to the woman I...love?
The word warmed him from the inside out.
I love you, Judy, he told the breeze of the Jetway as he jogged around slower passengers in his way. I love you so much it hurts.
She stood waiting for him, the look on her face more worried than happy. No big smile lit her green eyes like it had on his previous visits.
He faltered. I was gonna tell you something, only now....
Harley gulped at the impromptu flight he’d taken. Heck, he didn’t even have a bag of clothes to claim off the revolving carousel, he’d acted so foolishly fast. Maybe his impulsive flight was the result of the shootings in the office. Maybe it was because it could’ve been him as easily as Peters. Maybe because he could’ve lost everyone he loved that day. All he had in the world was his friends.
So many maybes....
Judy looked unhappy. Worried. He knew it then. He should’ve visited more often. Long distance relationships were hard enough for normal folks to maintain. Why’d he ever think he could handle one? Guilt for being dumb pierced his heart. This was the perpetual downside to being a man, the not knowing what was going on in his woman’s mind.
Well, now that I’m here...
She didn’t wait for him to cross the distance between them. With a rush, she ran the last dozen steps and threw herself into his arms. With a breath of peppermint, she planted her lips against his, her tears wet on his face.
His heart started beating again. He held her face to his and met her kisses with equal parts relief and passion.
“Harley. I took the month off.” She came up for air.
“I only have two weeks off,” he said between mouthfuls.
“I don’t care. I don’t want you to le
ave.”
“I can’t stay. I’m only here for—” He buried his face in the midst of her thick, red tresses and breathed her into his soul. This woman was everything to him. Life. Light. The best damned reason to live.
“Then...I can’t do this any more.” She pulled back, upsetting the calm. With a stomp of her booted foot, she let her temper fly. “Don’t you get it? This long distance dating? This never seeing each other? It’s too hard!”
He held her at arm’s length to see her better. They were both breathing hard. Those green eyes were firing sparks and cinders. He thought he’d read her body language correctly, but somewhere between the first “Harley” and the last kiss, the conversation had taken a scary U-turn.
“I mean it.” Tears tracked over her flushed cheeks. She bit her lip. It seemed she was making the biggest decision of her life. “I can’t do it any more.”
His heart sank. Was she waiting for him to say that elusive right thing lovers were supposed to say to each other at times like this? Heck, he was a man. He had no idea what she needed to hear. And was he seeing things? Was he wrong? Did he not see love shining behind those teary emerald greens?
What the hell’s going on?
“I don’t know what to say,” he confessed, his heart reeling with confusion. He let his hands slip off her arms. If she didn’t love him, it didn’t matter what came out of his stupid mouth next. Peters was right. He was the biggest loser ever.
“No, Harley. No. I can’t do this anymore. This!” She pushed him backward with all her strength, angry and–something else. What?
He could not for the life of him understand her. She’d gone from sad to angry so fast he couldn’t keep up. Loving someone shouldn’t be so complicated.
What should I do? Hug you? Get back on the plane and leave? Help me out here, Judy. Tell me what you want me to do.
Zack (In the Company of Snipers Book 3) Page 30