by Lucian Bane
“Not until you tell me.”
“Tell you what?”
“That you will stay away from him.”
She shrugged. “Sure. And I’ll require the same of you of all females from here on out for the rest of your life.”
“Perfect,” I said. “My pleasure.”
“Hmm. We shall see?”
“Yes we shall.”
She nodded and shoved me off. “Let’s just try to finish this day, shall we? Remember the reason we’re here? Face your father? And brother, I now see. Both are clearly your demons. Dominate it, Lucian.” Her voice had turned hard and threatening.
“I’ll handle that, thank you, I don’t need you to tell me.” Or help me, I wanted to say. But I couldn’t manage the lie. Only I didn’t know what help I needed. And even if I did know that, asking her to help me would have been another matter. There was something about these problems that didn’t allow for outside assistance. Maybe it was because inside, I was still on an island. I’d created it, lived there safely for years. But now that I might need to leave it, I realized it was a one way ticket, which meant I was stranded. A castaway.
I heard loud voices and looked at the doorway. “Sounds like guests are starting to arrive. I see no point in participating in pool activities, either.”
“Okay,” she shrugged.
I nodded, not convinced with her answer. I wanted her to sign a contract. In blood. “If he sees you in a bathing suit, it’ll be like throwing gas on a fire. Tara, he’s dangerous.”
“I get it. No undressing at the pool. Are we done?”
I sighed and she patted my arm in an attempt at awkward reassurance.
“Let’s just…get through this and we’ll deal with the other matters later. I have your back. Okay?” She offered a handshake.
My heart grasped at that life line and I pulled her into my embrace and hugged her tight. “Thank you, love.”
****
Steve suddenly appeared in the kitchen, hissing, “I need to see you. Privately?” he raised his brows.
I looked at Tara, not wanting to let her out of my sight. “Go talk to my mother. Ask her about…her garden.”
“On it, dear.”
As I watched her leave, Steve yanked on my arm. “The flowers are here! I had them delivered to this address. Figured we’d keep on with the whole sorry plan.”
“Flowers?” I was lost.
“The twenty dozen Iris bouquets? Five hundred dollar special?”
“Yes, yes, good.” I looked at him, realizing the problem. “Shit, what am I supposed to say, it’s my mother’s birthday. Did we even get her something?”
By the distension of his eyeballs, that was a fucking negative. Jeeeeesus. “Go into town right now and buy her something.”
“Like what?”
“I have no idea!”
“Don’t you worry, I’ll figure it out.” He hit me on the arm and spun to head out to the task.
“Wrap it!” I hissed.
“Duh!” he called back.
Shit. I hurried into the den next to the dining and froze at seeing the woman being introduced. No fucking way. Dear God.
“Lucian,” mom called at spotting me. “Look who’s visiting! I told her you were coming home for my birthday and invited her to surprise you!”
I walked in, looking for Tara. I found her standing among them, like a frozen statue, staring out the window with a need to fly away look on her face. All while everybody chattered to Stacey, whom my mom kept referencing to as my first love. Motherfuck.
I went to Tara and stood behind her, wrapping her in my arms. “Long time no see, Stacy,” I said, sounding as unenthused as I could.
“Hey, Lucian,” she fluttered her fingers at me with that cute Texan smile that had initially won my young heart.
“Did you meet my beautiful girlfriend, Tara?”
“I did. You and I have so much to catch up on, cowboy,” she sang, like Tara earned the significance of a dog.
Fuck this was not happening.
I turned Tara to me and took her face in my hands and kissed her softly. “You okay, love? I’m here. Together, remember?”
She patted my hand then removed it. “I remember, we’re good here.”
“A gift has arrived for you, Mrs. Bane.”
My mother turned to the smiling chubby merry-maid. “Oh?” She hurried to follow her and I pulled Tara toward the outside deck off the living room.
“Lucian Bane!” my mother called. “You sent all these flowers to me?” She laughed and clapped. “Luke, your son had twenty dozen Iris bouquets delivered to my door!”
Aaaand, another bullet to the head on that sorry. “You’re welcome mom, I love you. Tara picked them out.”
“Well they are beautiful. Thank you both.”
Tara nodded and I led her the rest of the way to the door, hoping nobody followed.
“Don’t go far, your sisters will be arriving soon, Lucian,” my father yelled. “Jared, can you give me a hand with the keg?”
“Sure, Pop.”
I snarled inwardly at the stark difference in his tone when he addressed me and Jared.
“Hey, Lucian,” Jared called. “How about some pool volleyball later? Ready to kick your ass.”
I shut the door ignoring him and led her out of view. “I’m so sorry, I had no idea they’d bring her here. I’m not sure, but can we please consider that she’s just a set up?”
“What do you mean?” she asked, seeming curious.
“Part of Dom Wars. There’s no way this is coincidence. They know we’re fighting, maybe they’re trying to make us break.”
“Why would they? We’re team America.”
I made an exaggerated show of checking my watch. “I don’t know.” I widened my eyes at her and she slowly squinted.
“Okay, yes. I’m willing to consider that. For now.”
I put my forehead to hers and pulled her close to me. “God, I fucking hate your dress.”
She snickered softly. “Why?”
“Because you’re too fucking beautiful in it.”
She held my face and kissed my lips, smiling. “Score.”
“It’s not a play,” I whispered, “it’s so ridiculously true. I want to lock you in the closet until it’s time to leave. But… visit you every thirty minutes. Bring you snacks. And orgasms.” I gave her soft kisses between my words and she smiled more. I took advantage and deepened the kiss, pulling all that softness into my body until an emotional climax threatened me. I broke the kiss and hugged her tight. “This is going to become a broken record, but… you’re mine. That’s all.”
****
I watched Lucian attempt to fit in with his own family from my spot way off yonder of the crowd. Farthest table from the pool.
My heart ached for him but every time I tried to be what I knew he needed, those words he’d said to that bitch in the store would stab me and send me running inside myself. Guard. Guard. Guard. The mantra was screaming now after all he’d done. And God. Why?
The answer to that made me sick because deep down, I knew. I’d hurt him beyond repair and he was lashing out subconsciously. Rejected him too many times when he’d handed me his heart so readily and easily and completely. How was I supposed to know he meant it? What moron did that? More specifically, what man? No, more specifically, what man at a competition to be a top Dom did that?
Go all my life with no luck or the worst luck and then you get good luck once and you throw it away. Would it be so bad to just… forgive him? I was pretty sure I could. In fact, I was waiting for a sext. Praying for one. At least during that I could be what he needed and I didn’t have to forgive. It was like having my cake and eating it to. I realized what that meant. I wanted to not care that he’d done those things. What did that say about me? About my self-esteem? I couldn’t live without him no matter how he treated me?
Jesus, I was headed into bad waters with this. And still I could feel it. The urge to throw all that caution to
the wind and pretend he’d never done it, pretend the only thing that was true was what we shared when we made love. It certainly far surpassed the bad. Until I thought about the bad, that is. But I was willing to try to not think about it.
His sisters finally made it there. Finally, normal people. I really liked his older sister, Hanna, with the two kids. And her husband seemed really caring. The younger sister, Jennifer, was a bit overweight and with an older guy who Lucian clearly didn’t like. I couldn’t blame him. He sort of treated her like a slave. And the way she was so eager to do whatever he said was kind of sad. Mostly because he seemed to not appreciate it. Expected it. I didn’t like him because he dipped. Gross.
I checked my phone for the tenth time to see if I’d missed a text. Lucian said maybe that whore-of-Lucifers-nanny was behind our troubles. I better not find out that was true.
Once the party was in full swing, I kept noticing Lucian constantly trying to make his way to me only to get called off by a family member he couldn’t ignore. It was agonizing to watch. I’d smile at him whenever he looked my way to reassure him. It didn’t make his day but it lessened the tension lines around his sexy mouth. I just wanted to kiss him and we could both forget for thirty minutes.
But that bastard father and brother of his. Wow. What slime. How could they treat their own family like that? If I had a brother or sister, God, I’d cherish them so bad. But then maybe I wouldn’t, maybe I’d be anal like they are. And I hated to say it but, as sweet as his mother was, she was just ridiculous. Playing pretend queen to that Hitler when she was really just a slave, a possession. Wanting people to worship him. Fucking insane. And to think that was listed as some acceptable kink? Made my Missouri blood boil.
I realized Lucian had disappeared and I looked all around for him. My phone vibrated and I nearly jumped out of my skin, dropping the damn thing on the ground. I picked it up and hurried to read the text. Confusion hit me. Flirt with Lucian’s brother. Don’t speak of the assignment until after the domination.
Oh fuck beans, really? As if on cue, here came Jedadiah Jock, swaggering toward me with a drink in his hand. Clearly not his first. He didn’t seem to mind hitting on Lucian’s true love—dumb bitch—or any other available female. Which…now that I considered it, there was only me.
“Hey baby, why aren’t you out there having fun?”
“I’m allergic to it.” I looked around for Lucian again and still didn’t see him.
He laughed. “To fun?”
“Pretty much.” Shit, what was flirting, anyway?
He pulled up a chair and scooted it close to mine, sat so that our knees nearly touched then leaned forward on his forearms. “Maybe you’ve never had real fun.” His alcoholic words nearly burned my eyes.
I resisted the need to wave my hand before me to clear the air, remembering the stupid assignment. “Uh. Maybe not. Right.”
He stroked my knee with his finger and I resisted the need to slap it away. “Wanna go for a swim with me?”
“I…don’t have a suit.”
“My sister has one.”
“I don’t swim.”
“What do you do?”
“Do puzzles. Read obituaries, mostly. Tell people how to live their lives.”
“Is that right?” he drawled. “I wouldn’t mind telling you how to suck my cock.”
I swallowed, lowering my gaze. How long was I supposed to endure this? Was it even flirting? Talking to him wasn’t exactly flirting, was it?
“Gather around, it’s time to sing happy birthday.”
I jumped up at the father’s call and finally found Lucian. Talking to the love of his life. The sight punched me in the stomach.
“Looks like your boyfriend is re-bonding with his true love.” The sarcastic drawl next to my ear made me nauseous.
“I insist on doing the honors Mildreth,” Steve said, “If it’s okay with your husband of course?”
“Fine, sing away little birdie.” The man insulted everybody.
I hurried over and Jared caught up, linking his arm in mine. “I better escort you, little lady. Wouldn’t want you getting hurt along the way.”
I found Lucian’s glare aimed at me. Finally. My heart raced at the black fury in his face. He leaned in to his whore friend and kissed her on the cheek just as Steve began to sing Happy Birthday.
Jared swung me into his arms and danced me like a puppet as he sang the song too.
I struggled to get out of his hold but he held too tight. God was he going to make me cause a scene? I allowed him to dance me for his mother’s sake, no harm in that.
He put his hand on my ass at the last happy birthday and I turned to see Lucian there. “Let her fucking go.”
Jared laughed obnoxiously. “Go back to the love of your life, bro, I’m busy.”
“Let her go!” Lucian yelled in his face.
Jared shoved me away and Lucian decked him immediately after. His brother staggered then toppled to the ground after tripping over a plant.
“Lucian!” his mother screamed. “You stop that.”
“You want some?” Jared wiped at the blood on his lip as he staggered back up. “I been wanting to give it to you, you little pussy.”
Lucian stood there, his face a mask of unspeakable contempt and fury.
“Leave my son alone, Lucian,” his father boomed.
Lucian looked at him. “Tell your fucking son to not touch her and I will.”
His father sneered. “You don’t mean to tell me you’re going to let a cheap hussy come between family. You never was one to have much respect for family, but you best be behaving regardless at your mother’s party.”
Chapter Fourteen
I fought to breathe through my rage as I stared at my mother’s crimped face.
“Lucian, please,” she begged. “Let it go sweetheart. It’s not worth it.”
Not worth it. I finally realized what that meant. It all hit me rather suddenly. It’s not worth it. Interpret: I wasn’t worth it. All these years, that’s what she was trying to tell me. All her defense wasn’t for me, it was for her, for them. Not me. “It’s not worth it?” I shook my head, floored at the shocking revelation. “Don’t you mean I’m not worth it, mom?”
“Don’t you take that tone with my wife!” dad bellowed, stepping forward while Jared staggered nearby, readying an attack.
“She’s my mother! And you are a fucking pig to her! And she…” I gasped, staring at her, seeing the ugly truth I never wanted to admit. “She lets you.” I shook my head, devastated by it. “All these years… You let him, right? Shhhhh. Don’t tell? It’ll be okay? You’ll see? But it was never fucking okay mom.”
“Don’t blame others for your sins, boy!” dad yelled. “Guilt eatin’ your core? For all the sins you’ve committed against this family? Your whorings catch up to you? Ever since you were three years old I saw it. In those rebellious eyes of yours.” He pointed at me. “You’re no son of mine.”
“Daddy, stop,” my youngest sister, Jennifer, cried. “He’s our brother.”
“You stay out of this.”
“No! No, I won’t stay out of this. You have never given Lucian a chance. All he’s ever done is protect me. He was the best big brother I know.”
“Protect you?”
“Stop it!” she screamed. “You hurt him enough for that. He was only ten! He was just a kid daddy. He was so so sorry! He paid for his sins! We all did. And we shouldn’t have.”
“But you didn’t pay, did you, dad?” I said. “You just get to ruin everybody, break everybody and go on being king. Look at mom. Don’t you see what you’ve done to her? You don’t cherish her. You don’t love her, adore her! Look at that punk Jennifer is with. Notice a resemblance dad? He’s a fucking prick like you. Bossing her around, treating her like a possession rather than a fucking—treasure!” I yelled. “Because you showed her what kind of man to look for, didn’t you dad!”
His face nearly turned purple with rage as he walked toward me. She
came out of the corner of my eye, like an angel, stepping between me and him, holding her hand toward him. “Don’t you put your hand on him.”
He stopped short and sneered at her and I braced to kill him. I’d just go to prison, that was all. Rabid animals could only be put down, not fixed.
“You should move out of my way before you get hurt.”
“You’re not laying a hand on him!” her voice trembled and broke. “What is wrong with you? How can you not see how good this man is! Do you know what he’s done for me?”
“I don’t—”
“Listen!” she screamed at him. “You listen to me,” she sobbed. “This man is a fucking angel. He rescued me. From my own hell. All of this he is doing today is for me. Because he’s selfless. He is beautiful. He is goddamn perfect.” She stepped closer to him and I tensed. “And you will not hurt him anymore. Not one of you. Because I am his protector. His rear guard. I am his.”
My father’s hand shot out and latched to her throat. He lifted her off the ground and everybody screamed.
“I’ll crush her throat boy if you lay one finger on me.”
Tara held his hands, remaining still in the air.
“Please dad,” I said. “Let her go. You want to hurt me? Here I am. Not her.”
“You piece of shit, bringing this whore here. I should have shot you on the lawn like I wanted. But you goddamn mother always has to whine for her way, for her little pussy son that ain’t even mine, no goddamn way you are.”
“You’re right. I’m not yours. Just let her go. And we’re leaving.”
“Damn fucking right you’re leaving.” He set her down and the second her feet touched, her legs flew up and my dad came forward hard onto the ground.
I jumped back as Tara worked him into one of her famous formidable holds then I turned and nailed my brother when he attempted to go for her.
I looked around and grabbed the heavy glass ashtray off the table to lay my brother out with if he got up again while my father roared in pain.
“You choke women, Mr. Bane? Is that what you do? Is that what you learned in your church? Your military?” she gasped. “Look at you now, tough guy.”