Trepan, breathing heavily after the climb, said, “Usually, only seniors and graduates are allowed here. But I’m making an exception in your case. I just wanted to show you one of the advantages of belonging to Lam Kha Alif. None of the other houses have a library like this.”
Trepan was looking narrow-eyed at him. “Eyeball the books. But don’t touch them. They, uh, absorb, if you know what I mean.”
Desmond moved around, looking at the titles. When he was finished, he said, “I’m impressed. I thought some of these books were to be found only in the university library. In locked rooms.”
“That’s what the public thinks. Listen, if you pledge us, you’ll have access to these books. Only don’t tell the other undergrads. They’d get jealous.”
Trepan, still narrow-eyed, as if he were considering something that perhaps he shouldn’t, said, “Would you mind turning your back and sticking your fingers in your ears?”
Desmond said, “What?”
Trepan smiled. “Oh, if you sign up with us, you’ll be given the little recipe necessary to work in here. But until then I’d just as soon you don’t see it.”
Desmond, smiling with embarrassment, the cause of which he couldn’t account, for, and also feeling excited, turned his back, facing away from Trepan, and jammed his fingertips into his ears. While he stood there in the very quiet room—was it soundproofed with insulation or with something perhaps not material?—he counted the seconds. One thousand and one, one thousand and two …
A little more than a minute had passed when he felt Trepan’s hand on his shoulder. He turned and removed his fingers. The fat youth was holding out to him a tall but very slim volume bound in a skin with many small dark protuberances. Desmond was surprised, since he was sure he had not seen it on the shelves.
“I deactivated this,” Trepan said. “Here. Take it.” He looked at his wristwatch. “It’ll be okay for ten minutes.”
There was no title or by-line on the cover. And, now that he looked at it closely and felt it, he did not think the skin was from an animal.
Trepan said, “It’s the hide of an old Atechironnon himself.”
Desmond said, “Ah!” and he trembled. But he rallied.
“He must have been covered with warts.”
“Yeah. Go ahead, look at it. It’s a shame you can’t read it, though.”
The first page was slightly yellowed, which wasn’t surprising for paper four hundred years old. There was no printing but large handwritten letters.
“Ye lesser Rituall of Ye Tahmmsiquegg Warlock Atechironunn,” Desmond read. “Reprodust from ye Picture-riting on ye Skin lefft unbirnt by ye Godly.
“By his own Hand, Simon Conant. 1641.
“Let him who speaks these Words of Pictures, first lissen.”
Trepan chuckled and said, “Spelling wasn’t his forte, was it?”
“Simon, the half brother of Roger Conant,” Desmond said. “He was the first white man to visit the Tamsiqueg and not leave with his severed thumb stuck up his ass. He was also with the settlers who raided the Tamsiqueg, but they didn’t know who his sympathies were with. He fled with the badly wounded Atechironnon into the wilderness. Twenty years later, he appeared in Virginia with this book.”
He slowly turned the five pages, fixing each pictograph in his photographic memory. There was one figure he didn’t like to look at.
“Layamon’s the only one who can read it,” Trepan said.
Desmond did not tell him that he was conversant with the grammar and small dictionary of the Tamsiqueg language, written by William Cor Dunnes in 1624 and published in 1654. It contained an appendix translating the pictographs. It had cost him twenty years of search and a thousand dollars just for a Xerox copy. His mother has raised hell about the expenditure, but for once he had stood up to her. Not even the university had a copy.
Trepan looked at his watch. “One minute to go. Hey!”
He grabbed the book from Desmond’s hands and said, harshly, “Turn your back and plug your ears!”
Trepan looked as if he were in a panic. He turned, and a minute later Trepan pulled one of Desmond’s fingers away.
“Sorry to be so sudden, but the hold was beginning to break down. I can’t figure it out. It’s always been good for at least ten minutes.”
Desmond had not felt anything, but that might be because Trepan, having been exposed to the influence, was more sensitive to it.
Trepan, obviously nervous, said, “Let’s get out of here. It’s got to cool off.”
On the way down, he said, “You sure you can’t read it?”
“Where would I have learned how?” Desmond said.
They plunged into a sea of noise and odors in the big room. They did not stay long, since Trepan wanted to show him the rest of the house, except the basement.
“You can see it sometime this week. Just now it’s not advisable to go down there.”
Desmond didn’t ask why.
When they entered a very small room on the second floor, Trepan said, “Ordinarily we don’t let freshmen have a room to themselves. But for you … well, it’s yours if you want it.”
That pleased Desmond. He wouldn’t have to put up with someone whose habits would irk him and whose chatter would anger him.
They descended to the first floor. The big room was not so crowded now. Old Layamon, just getting up from the chair, beckoned to him. Desmond approached him slowly. For some reason, he knew he was not going to like what Layamon would say to him. Or perhaps he wasn’t sure whether he would like it or not.
“Trepan showed you the frat’s more precious books,” the chairman said. It wasn’t a question but a statement. “Especially Conant’s book.”
Trepan said, “How did you …?” He grinned. “You felt it.”
“Of course,” the rusty voice said. “Well, Desmond, don’t you think it’s time to answer that phone?”
Trepan looked puzzled. Desmond felt sick and cold.
Layamon was now almost nose to nose with Desmond. The many wrinkles of the doughy skin looked like hieroglyphs.
“You’ve made up your mind, but you aren’t letting yourself know it,” he said. “Listen. That was Conant’s advice, wasn’t it? Listen. From the moment you got onto the plane to Boston, you were committed. You could have backed out in the airport, but you didn’t, even though, I imagine, your mother made a scene there. But you didn’t. So there’s no use putting it off.”
He chuckled. “That I am bothering to give you advice is a token of my esteem for you. I think you’ll go far and fast. If you are able to eliminate certain defects of character. It takes strength and intelligence and great self-discipline and a vast dedication to get even a B.A. here, Desmond.
“There are too many who enroll here because they think they’ll be taking snap courses. Getting great power, hobnobbing with things that are really not socially minded, to say the least, seems to them to be as easy as rolling off a log. But they soon find out that the department’s standards are higher than, say, those of MIT in engineering. And a hell of a lot more dangerous.
“And then there’s the moral issue. That’s declared just by enrolling here. But how many have the will to push on? How many decide that they are on the wrong side? They quit, not knowing that it’s too late for any but a tiny fraction of them to return to the other side. They’ve declared themselves, have stood up and been counted forever, as it were.”
He paused to light up a brown panatela. The smoke curled around Desmond, who did not smell what he expected. The odor was not quite like that of a dead bat he had once used in an experiment.
“Every man or woman determines his or her own destiny. But I would make my decision swiftly, if I were you. I’ve got my eye on you, and your advancement here does depend upon my estimate of your character and potentiality.
“Good day, Desmond.”
The old man walked out. Trepan said, “What was that all about?”
Desmond did not answer. He stood for a minute or s
o while Trepan fidgeted. Then he said good-by to the fat man and walked out slowly. Instead of going home, he wandered around the campus. Attracted by flashing red lights, he went over to see what was going on. A car with the markings of the campus police and an ambulance from the university hospital were in front of a two-story building. Its lower floor had once been a grocery store according to the letters on the dirty plate-glass window. The paint inside and out was peeling, and plaster had fallen off the walls within, revealing the laths beneath. On the bare wooden floor were three bodies. One was the youth who had stood just in front of him in the line in the gymnasium. He lay on his back, his mouth open below the scraggly mustache.
Desmond asked one of the people pressed against the window what had happened. The gray-bearded man, probably a professor, said, “This happens every year at this time. Some kids get carried away and try something no one but an M.A. would even think of trying. It’s strictly forbidden, but that doesn’t stop those young fools.”
The corpse with the mustache seemed to have a large round black object or perhaps a burn on its forehead. Desmond wanted to get a closer look, but the ambulance men put a blanket over the face before carrying the body out.
The gray-bearded man said, “The university police and the hospital will handle them.” He laughed shortly. “The city police don’t even want to come on the campus. The relatives will be notified they’ve OD’d from heroin.”
“There’s no trouble about that?”
“Sometimes. Private detectives have come here, but they don’t stay long.”
Desmond walked away swiftly. His mind was made up. The sight of those bodies had shaken him. He’d go home, make peace with his mother, sell all the books he’d spent so much time and money accumulating and studying, take up writing mystery novels. He’d seen the face of death, and if he did what he had thought about, only idly of course, fantasizing for psychic therapy, he would see her face. Dead. He couldn’t do it.
When he entered his room in the boardinghouse, the phone was still ringing. He walked to it, reached out his hand, held it for an undeterminable time, then dropped it. As he walked toward the couch, he noticed that the Coca-Cola bottle had been shoved or pulled out of the hole in the baseboard. He knelt down and jammed it back into the hole. From behind the wall came a faint twittering.
He sat down on the sagging couch, took his notebook from his jacket pocket, and began to pencil in the pictographs he remembered so well on the sheets. It took him half an hour, since exactness of reproduction was vital. The phone did not stop ringing.
Someone knocked on the door and yelled, “I saw you go in! Answer the phone or take it off the hook! Or I’ll put something on you!”
He did not reply or rise from the couch.
He had left out one of the drawings in the sequence. Now he poised the pencil an inch above the black space. Sitting at the other end of the line would be a very fat, very old woman. She was old and ugly now, but she had borne him and for many years thereafter she had been beautiful. When his father had died, she had gone to work to keep their house and to support her son in the manner to which both were accustomed. She had worked hard to pay his tuition and other expenses while he went to college. She had continued to work until he had sold two novels. Then she had gotten sickly, though not until he began bringing women home to introduce as potential wives.
She loved him, but she wouldn’t let loose of him, and that wasn’t genuine love. He hadn’t been able to tear loose, which meant that though he was resentful he had something in him which liked being caged. Then, one day, he had decided to take the big step toward freedom. It had been done secretly and swiftly. He had despised himself for his fear of her, but that was the way he was. If he stayed here, she would be coming here. He couldn’t endure that. So, he would have to go home.
He looked at the phone, started to rise, sank back.
What to do? He could commit suicide. He’d be free, and she would know how angry he’d been with her. He gave a start as the phone stopped ringing. So, she had given up for a while. But she would return to it.
He looked at the baseboard. The bottle was moving out from the hole a little at a time. Something behind the wall was working away determinedly. How many times had it started to leave the hole and found that its passage was blocked? Far too many, the thing must think, if it had a mind. But it refused to give up, and someday it might occur to it to solve its problem by killing the one who was causing the problem.
If, however, it was daunted by the far greater size of the problem maker, if it lacked courage, then it would have to keep on pushing the bottle from the hole. And …
He looked at the notebook, and he shook. The blank space had been filled in. There was the drawing of Cotoaahd, the thing which, now he looked at it, somehow resembled his mother.
Had he unconsciously penciled it in while he was thinking?
Or had the figure formed itself?
It didn’t matter. In either case, he knew what he had to do.
While the eyes passed over each drawing, and he intoned the words of that long-dead language, he felt something move out from within his chest, crawl into his belly, his legs, his throat, his brain. The symbol of Cotoaahd seemed to burn on the sheet when he pronounced its name, his eyes on the drawing.
The room grew dark as the final words were said. He rose and turned on a table lamp and went into the tiny dirty bathroom. The face in the mirror did not look like a murderer’s; it was just that of a sixty-year-old man who had been through an ordeal and was not quite sure that it was over.
On the way out of the room, he saw the Coke bottle slide free of the baseboard hole. But whatever had pushed it was not yet ready to come out.
Hours later he returned reeling from the campus tavern. The phone was ringing again. But the call, as he had expected, was not from his mother, though it was from his native city in Illinois.
“Mr. Desmond, this is Sergeant Rourke of the Busiris Police Department. I’m afraid I have some bad news for you. Uh, ah, your mother died some hours ago of a heart attack.”
Desmond did not have to act stunned. He was numb throughout. Even the hand holding the receiver felt as if it had turned to granite. Vaguely, he was aware that Rourke’s voice seemed strange.
“Heart attack? Heart …? Are you sure?”
He groaned. His mother had died naturally. He would not have had to recite the ancient words. And now he had committed himself for nothing and was forever trapped. Once the words were used while the eyes read, there was no turning back.
But … if the words had been only words, dying as sound usually does, no physical reaction resulting from words transmitted through that subcontinuum, then was he bound?
Wouldn’t he be free, clear of debt? Able to walk out of this place without fear of retaliation?
“It was a terrible thing, Mr. Desmond. A freak accident. Your mother died while she was talking to a visiting neighbor, Mrs. Sammins. Sammins called the police and an ambulance. Some other neighbors went into the house, and then … then.…”
Rourke’s throat seemed to be clogging.
“I’d just got there and was on the front porch when it … it.…”
Rourke coughed, and he said, “My brother was in the house, too.”
Three neighbors, two ambulance attendants, and two policemen had been crushed to death when the house had unaccountably collapsed.
“It was like a giant foot stepped on it. If it’d fallen in six seconds later, I’d have been caught, too.”
Desmond thanked him and said he’d take the next plane out to Busiris.
He staggered to the window, and he raised it to breathe in the open air. Below, in the light of a streetlamp, hobbling along on his cane, was Layamon. The gray face lifted. Teeth flashed whitely.
Desmond wept, but the tears were only for himself.
* Originally published in Fantasy and Science Fiction, May 1979.
Jerusalem’s Lot*
STEPHEN KING
DEAR BONES,
How good it was to step into the cold, draughty hall here at Chapelwaite, every bone in an ache from that abominable coach, in need of instant relief from my distended bladder—and to see a letter addressed in your own inimitable scrawl propped on the obscene little cherrywood table beside the door! Be assured that I set to deciphering it as soon as the needs of the body were attended to (in a coldly ornate downstairs bathroom where I could see my breath rising before my eyes).
I’m glad to hear that you are recovered from the miasma that has so long set in your lungs, although I assure you that I do sympathize with the moral dilemma the cure has affected you with. An ailing abolitionist healed by the sunny climes of slave-struck Florida! Still and all, Bones, I ask you as a friend who has also walked in the valley of the shadow, to take all care of yourself and venture not back to Massachusetts until your body gives you leave. Your fine mind and incisive pen cannot serve us if you are clay, and if the Southern zone is a healing one, is there not poetic justice in that?
Yes, the house is quite as fine as I had been led to believe by my cousin’s executors, but rather more sinister. It sits atop a huge and jutting point of land perhaps three miles north of Falmouth and nine miles north of Portland. Behind it are some four acres of grounds, gone back to the wild in the most formidable manner imaginable—junipers, scrub vines, bushes, and various forms of creeper climb wildly over the picturesque stone walls that separate the estate from the town domain. Awful imitations of Greek statuary peer blindly through the wrack from atop various hillocks—they seem, in most cases, about to lunge at the passer-by. My cousin Stephen’s tastes seem to have run the gamut from the unacceptable to the downright horrific. There is an odd little summer house which has been nearly buried in scarlet sumac and a grotesque sundial in the midst of what must once have been a garden. It adds the final lunatic touch.
Tales of the Cthulhu Mythos Page 57