by Margaret Way
They made an appointment for the following week and Steffi drove home feeling a lot more upbeat than she had for a long time. Talking to Lauren had been the first step and now she was really feeling as if she might be back on the right track. It was good to feel that she was taking action to turn her life around, get her old confidence back. And if that left her with some energy to enjoy a friendship with Matt, maybe there’d be no harm in that. Even Lauren’s wedding was starting to gain more appeal, whereas until today the thought of playing the happy bridesmaid for hours had been anything but happy.
She pulled up outside her parents” house and watched as Jess came running out to meet her. Soon the old house would be Jack and Lauren’s and her parents would have moved to give her mother a chance to enjoy city life for the first time in their marriage. Soon, too, Jess would grow up and no longer run as fast as she could to hug her when she came home. And what would her life be like then? Life moved on, people changed, and if she didn’t get her act together now, there’d be no chance of having a full and contented life once she no longer had a young daughter to fill her days.
She opened the door and stepped out, catching Jess in her arms and swinging her out wide in an arc around her body, her heart filling with joy as she saw pleasure light up Jess’s face. Steffi slowed and put her daughter back down and they held hands as they walked across the yard to the house. Little moments like these were like gold. “Good day, sweetheart?”
“Yup. Granny and I picked up all our dresses for Saturday. Grandpa says I’ll look prettier than the bride.”
Steffi smiled, feeling grateful for the umpteenth time that after a rocky start, when she’d first found out she was pregnant, her dad had been wrapped around his granddaughter’s finger from the day she’d been born. “I bet he didn’t say that with Auntie Lauren around.”
“She’s at work. She’s coming tonight to see our dresses on. Tomorrow’s Friday, it’s only two more sleeps, Mum.”
“Only two! We’d better get a wriggle on with dinner, then, or you won’t be ready for Auntie Lauren.”
Matt checked his watch—a quarter past twelve. ETA was twenty-five minutes past, not long now. It seemed for ever since he and Ryan had taken off from Belcanna Station in the AAS plane, although only twenty minutes had passed.
Matt sat hunched over his seven-year-old patient, watching her intently, praying that the object she’d inhaled wouldn’t dislodge more. If it moved further down Kirsten’s larynx it could block her airway, suffocating her. He hadn’t moved since they had picked Kirsten up from her parents” station, watching her like a hawk the whole flight.
When the call had come from Sheila, Matt hadn’t expected he would need to evacuate the patient. It was a common occurrence so he was frustrated that he hadn’t been able to retrieve the offending object. Kirsten had certainly taken a good breath in and there had been no way he could have reached the obstruction with tweezers, it was too far back.
Libby, Kirsten’s mother, had tried unsuccessfully, before calling for help. It wasn’t the first time he’d flown out to their place and it wouldn’t be the last. The Smyth family was used to drama. With five children, each one wilder than the one before, they were familiar with all manner of childhood accidents and well known to the AAS.
Matt was concerned now but all he could do was to wait and watch and hope. If the foreign body did move and restrict her breathing, he wasn’t sure what his options were in the confines of the light aircraft.
He needed to get Kirsten into Theatre. Her only chance was for him to remove it under anaesthetic. So far their luck was holding, and as long as Kirsten could continue to breathe comfortably through her mouth, they had time.
“We’re approaching for landing now.” Ryan’s voice drifted back from the cockpit. It had been a hectic ninety minutes since they had first left the AAS base but the episode was far from over. Matt mentally crossed his fingers that Kirsten would come through unscathed.
Connor Fitzpatrick was waiting with the ambulance to whisk Matt, Kirsten and her mum to the hospital. “Pam asked me to let you know Theatre Two is ready for you,” the paramedic told Matt.
“Who’s the anaesthetist?”
“Dave Barker. He’s doing his regular Friday stint in Theatres.”
“Great. We’ll take Kirsten straight to Theatre on arrival.” Matt turned to Libby. “Pam will have a consent form prepared for you, I’ll leave you to fill in all the paperwork while I fix Kirsten up, OK?”
Libby just nodded. She hadn’t spoken on the flight, except to Kirsten. Matt knew she was worried but could see she was taking his instructions in.
Within fifteen minutes of landing, Connor and Matt wheeled the stretcher into the operating theatre, greeting Dave, who was already in position.
“Dr Barker is going to put a needle in the back of your hand and give you a bit of anaesthetic to make you sleepy, Kirsten. Then I’ll be able to get this thing out for you,” Matt explained, before dashing off to scrub.
He returned to find the nurse, already gloved and gowned, holding a theatre gown ready for him. He slid his arms into the sleeves and did a double-take when their eyes met above her mask.
His smile was hidden by his mask but it was there in his voice as he said, “Another one of your many talents, Steffi? Theatre nurse?”
“I’m full of surprises.”
“I don’t doubt that for a minute.”
“Gloves.” She held out one and then the other for Matt to wriggle his fingers into before tying his mask. “She’s under,” Dave called out.
Matt walked over to the operating table and explained the patient’s background to Dave. “Kirsten here decided to copy her sixteen-year-old sister who’s just come home with a nose ring. Unfortunately, Kirsten breathed in at the wrong time and inhaled her pretend piercing.” Matt shone a light up Kirsten’s nostril to check the position of the foreign body. “You’ll need to be extremely careful when you’re intubating her. I don’t want to risk dislodging the foreign body. It’s lodged in her larynx but too far back to reach with tweezers so I’m going to have to suction it out.”
“OK, steady as she goes.” Dave slid the artificial airway into position. “Got it.”
“So far, so good. I need the suction unit. Tubing, please.” Matt took the thin plastic tube from Steffi and slid one end up one of Kirsten’s nostrils and down the back of her larynx. His movements were slow and deliberate, not wanting to cause any unnecessary trauma to the child’s airway.
“OK, I’ve hit a blockage.” He shone the light up Kirsten’s other nostril to check his positioning. “This must be it.” Matt switched the suction on and in less than a second had extracted a small, plastic object. Turning the suction off, he dropped the doughnut-shaped offending article into the kidney dish Steffi held out for him.
“What on earth is it?” Dave asked, glancing into the dish at the bright pink item.
Matt shrugged. “I have no idea.”
“It’s a doll’s earring,” Steffi said.
“A what?” both men asked.
“An earring for a doll. It’d be the perfect size for a nose-ring for a seven-year-old.” Why did he have the feeling she was trying to stifle a laugh under her face mask?
“The things they make for kids nowadays.” Dave shook his head as he reversed the light anaesthetic.
“You mean the things we find in kids” noses,” said Steffi.
“At least it makes a change from peas,” Matt added.
“We should run a competition in the staffroom—most bizarre foreign object found shoved up a nose wins.”
“She’s a lucky girl.” Steffi pulled off her mask. “Well done, Matt.”
She slipped behind him so he couldn’t see the sudden self-consciousness that had crept up on her when she’d praised him, and busied herself helping him untie his gown. Her hands brushed over his hips, sending tingles up her arms straight to her breasts. She caught her breath just in time but her fingers fumbled with the ties. She
couldn’t blame this strong reaction, this chemistry, on another life-threatening situation. Kirsten’s incident had been potentially life-threatening but Matt’s ability to perform the procedure had never been in question. There was an attraction between them, a powerful one.
Pulling apart the last of the cotton ties, she reached up to his shoulders and tugged on the green fabric, just as Matt reached one hand up to help shrug off the gown. His large hand closed over the very tips of her fingers and the sensation rocked her to the soles of her feet. He enclosed her fingers along with the fabric of the gown and slipped them both from his shoulder in one smooth movement. He loosened the fabric from her grasp but kept hold of her fingers, turning to look down at her.
She saw Matt’s grey eyes darken to slate and knew he felt it, too—how could he not? It was like an electric field, like the two of them together could tap into their own private energy source. She didn’t want to break the moment but there were things to be done. She looked away from him, reaching behind her, searching for the ties for her own gown.
“Let me.” Matt nodded towards the prep area, and they walked the few steps side by side. Matt took aim at the laundry bag, his gown dropping into it. He tossed his gloves and mask into the rubbish and now it was his turn to step closer and stand behind her to work at the ties of her gown.
She said nothing, just let it happen. She wanted this closeness with him, even if it was just to untie a couple of strings. His warm breath brushed her shoulders as he bent to help with her gown. Her hair was still tucked up into her theatre cap, leaving the soft skin of her neck exposed. Matt fumbled with the top tie and his fingers brushed the nape of her neck. This time she couldn’t help it. She gasped at the contact and when he slipped the gown from her body, she twisted around to look into his eyes again and her breathing went haywire.
She felt him slip his fingers beneath the edge of her cap and pull it back off her head, felt him run his fingers over the length of her ponytail as it uncoiled, released from the cap. His hand came to rest on her shoulder, the tips of his fingers resting on her shoulder blade and the imprint of each one was as clear as though he was pressing into her skin, although his touch was light. She tilted her face up towards his, drawn to him, knowing this wasn’t the time, wasn’t the place, knowing she shouldn’t need this, not here, not anywhere. But “shouldn’t” wasn’t a word her body seemed to recognise at this moment, and her brain had gone into temporary stasis. Knowledge about what was right, what her needs were, seemed very unimportant and vaporous compared to the want that was ripping through her. She wanted him. And there wasn’t a single thing she felt like doing about it. Not a single thing except standing on the tips of her toes and finding out what his lips tasted like.
CHAPTER FOUR
THE door opened and the soft sound was enough to snap them back to the real world, the world where they’d just finished in Theatre, the world where they were colleagues, nothing more.
Dave was standing half in, half out of the prep area. “Kirsten is settled in Recovery. I’ll get back to the list in Theatre One now.”
“Thanks.” Dave left and Matt cleared his throat, looking a little awkward. “I’d better go and tell Kirsten’s mum the good news. See you later?”
“At the wedding.”
He looked nonplussed. Maybe he also felt like he’d just been yanked out of a blissful dream.
“Tomorrow. Jack and Lauren’s wedding.” He looked too adorable for his own good when he was confused. She’d seen him like this before, at the wharf when they first met and he’d been trying to place her.
“Sorry, my mind must have been elsewhere. No prizes for guessing where.” He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear, the familiarity of the gesture somehow bringing to a close the strangeness of the last few minutes.
She watched as he left, running her gaze from his head, along the contours of his body, down his legs then back up again. She knew what Lauren meant about loving watching Jack walk away—she was getting the same rush from watching Matt’s butt. If they hadn’t been at work, she might have been hard-pressed not to haul him back in and wrap herself around him.
There was no denying that something strange was happening between them. They’d entered some personal twilight zone where sometimes she felt protected and safe and then at others … others, all she wanted to do was rip his shirt off and splay her fingers across his broad chest, which she knew instinctively would be all defined muscles and smooth brown skin. And in this space or time, whatever it was, she’d take as much as she got and there’d be no shame and no self-consciousness, only glorious worshipping of each other’s bodies and minds.
Mentally, she replayed the moments since Theatre had ended. She hadn’t seen it coming, and she didn’t know what it meant, but a ripple of delight ran through her with the knowledge that the attraction between them was mutual. She’d worry about what it all meant later because, for the first time in a long while, she’d remembered what it was like to not worry and it sure felt good.
The music started to play and Steffi gave Jess a gentle nudge in the back to start her walking down the aisle. Their dresses had looked beautiful the other night, but now they’d had their hair and make-up done—even Jess had pale pink nail polish on—they all felt beautiful, too.
Steffi turned and smiled at her dad and then at Lauren, who looked stunning in a simple dress of white silk with vibrant deep red roses embroidered around the lower part of the skirt. Lauren was keyed up with excitement, not an inch of the nervous bride about her. If anything, her dad looked as if he might have trouble stopping her from sprinting down the aisle to Jack.
She turned back to watch her daughter’s special moment. From the looks of it, Jess was going to make it last longer than the bride’s. She was walking at a snail’s pace and was only a quarter of the way down the aisle. Steffi wasn’t meant to start until Jess was halfway. Maybe they’d got her so worried about going too fast that she’d gone the other way.
Steffi made an executive decision and started walking. It wouldn’t do if the music stopped before Lauren had reached the altar, like musical chairs where the bride was left without a seat and was out of the game.
She took Jess’s cue and decided to enjoy her brief moment in the limelight. After all, the pressure wasn’t really on her, all eyes would be straining to get a look at the bride. Nonetheless, there were butterflies in her stomach and she knew she’d taken pleasure in looking her best today because Matt would be at the wedding.
She smiled to her left and right at the guests, most of whom she’d never seen before, while she wondered who it was who’d invented the “one step, feet together” style of cruising down the aisle. She felt like a virginal maiden mincing about the gardens. Then she looked to her left, straight into Matt’s appreciative eyes, and knew that the last thing she felt was virginal. There was no modesty in the heat coursing through her. If she’d been even slightly naïve, she supposed she should be blushing right now but, instead of looking shyly away, she looked dead into his eyes and sent him a killer smile. A smile that cut through the games and said, I feel it, too. I’ll see you at the reception. Where had that brazenness sprung from?
He looked incredible in his dinner suit, the cut making him appear even taller and leaner than he was and the black cloth accentuating his storm-grey eyes. He’d been tugging at his bow-tie when their eyes had met and she guessed a suit was not his clothing of choice. Maybe that was jumping to conclusions, but his slightly too-long hair and the casual clothes he favoured for work seemed much more his style. The lines of his face, which might have seemed too severe framed by a more traditional cut, were softened by the waves of his dark hair touching here and there against his olive skin. And when he smiled, the angular lines of his face, with stark cheekbones and strong jaw, were transformed.
As Steffi walked to the front of the church, her mind was still full of his image. When she reached the front, Jess slipped her hand into hers and together they turned to watch L
auren, Steffi’s eyes immediately searching Matt out in the congregation. It wasn’t hard. He stood taller than everyone around him. As Lauren moved past him, he turned along with everyone else to watch the bride being escorted to the front of the church. Steffi looked away from him, back at Lauren, but even though she couldn’t see him she was sure she could feel his eyes resting on her.
Her heart beat faster in her chest and a ripple of longing shot through her, but suddenly she was aware she was holding her breath and panic started to set in. Was she going to have an attack here right in the middle of the wedding and make a fool of herself? She took a deep breath but that seemed to make it worse. She couldn’t get enough air.
As if sensing her rising panic, Lauren turned to give her the bridal bouquet and whispered, “You’re fine, Steffi. I want you to count the petals of all the flowers in my bouquet.”
Steffi looked at her, startled, as Lauren went on with the service as though nothing unusual was happening. She did as she was asked, and started counting, realising a few minutes later that the attack had been averted. As ridiculous as Lauren’s order had seemed, it had taken her attention off her symptoms and the attack had passed. She chanced a glance at the congregation but no one seemed to have noticed anything. Her eyes rested on Matt and he was smiling at her. She sent him a smile in return, and it faltered a little, but at least he didn’t seem to think she was an oddball. She would find out soon enough at the reception.
Steffi excused herself from the elderly relatives she’d been talking to, for ever it seemed, and made her way to the bar, feeling parched after the hours of eating and chatting.
“Lime and soda, please.” It had been a lovely evening and although the older guests were starting to leave, for the rest of them it was far from over. The dancing was only just getting under way.