Starting Over

by Cheryl Douglas

  “I believe you,” Jane said, smiling. “You just have to convince my daughter.”

  ***

  Eve was sitting by the water—enjoying the soft lull of the waves as the setting sun streaked the sky with a soft umber—when she felt someone behind her. Turning around slowly, she was almost afraid to look up. Only one person could make the hairs on the back of her neck stand up like that… Alex.

  “Go away.” Gripping the arms of her chair, she vowed she wouldn’t let the crushing disappointment she’d been wrestling with for several days rise to the surface. The stress wasn’t good for her or the baby, and since peace had been hard to come by lately, she was determined not to let him steal that too. “I have nothing to say to you.”

  He claimed the chair beside her as though she hadn’t asked him to leave, but he remained silent.

  “What are doing?” she demanded.

  “Waiting until you’re ready to talk. I have no place to be, so if you need a day, week, month… I’m good with that.”

  “Why are you here?” she cried. He was stubborn enough to stick around until she agreed to hear him out.

  “We need to talk.”

  “I think we’ve said everything, don’t you?”

  “Not even close.” He laced his hands over his flat stomach and slouched in the chair. Crossing one ankle over the other, he looked as though he was settling in for a long chat. “I’m sorry.”

  Eve let his words sink in. She knew he was sorry—she’d heard his distress in his voice mail messages—but that couldn’t undo his accusations or the anguish it caused. “I arranged for the paternity test. Just to put your mind at ease.”

  “I was a stupid, callous bastard to say the things I did when you told me about the baby,” he said gently, shifting to face her. “I’m so damn sorry, Eve.”

  She closed her eyes when a tear threatened to spill down her cheek. “I believe you.” Alex had never used words to hurt her. He may have been insensitive or careless at times, but never malicious.

  “But that doesn’t change anything, does it?”

  “Some words are like missiles,” she said quietly. “Once you launch them, you can’t get them back. Not even if you misfire and hit an unintended target.”

  “You know I never meant to hurt you. I was just reeling… I didn’t know what to think, how to respond.”

  “And now that you’ve had a chance to think about it, how do you feel?” She was almost afraid to ask, but she’d tortured herself with that question for days. Was he sorry he hurt her, or was he sorry he’d lashed out and acted as if he didn’t want the baby she was carrying to be his? He stayed quiet for so long, she gave up waiting. “I guess I have my answer, don’t I?”

  He reached for her hand when she stood. “No, you don’t.” He coaxed her back down with a gentle tug. “I didn’t know how I felt at first. I was confused and shocked. Now that I’ve had a chance to think about it, I’m excited and happy. I want this baby.”

  She wanted to believe that, but knowing how he’d felt about having a baby when they were married made it difficult for her to believe he’d changed his mind so drastically. “Why do you feel differently now? You admitted you didn’t want a baby when we were married.” Since he’d told her that truth, she laid awake night after night, chastising herself for all the times she tried to draw him into conversation about the baby they would have… a baby that had been her dream, not his.

  “Everything was different then. I was working crazy hours, traveling all over the world. Now I can put down roots, be there for my kid… our kid. I can be the kind of dad I always wanted to be.”

  Her heart twisted thinking about the kind of father Alex would be. He would adore and spoil their child, but he could also be demanding. He expected perfection from himself and others—anything less was unacceptable. She hoped he wouldn’t be too hard on their son or daughter. She wanted them to find their own path, the way her aunt had encouraged her to find hers.

  “I’m glad you feel that way,” she said begrudgingly. “I’m sorry I threatened to cut you out of their life. I hope you know I would never have done that.” Living without a father during her formative years had taught her how much a child needs her daddy. She wanted her son or daughter to have a solid relationship with Alex, one that made them feel secure and loved.

  “I know.” He smiled. “I backed you into a corner, and you came out swinging. I wouldn’t have expected anything less.”

  She returned his smile, and a great sense of relief settled over her. She hated being at odds with him. “So, where do we go from here?”

  “Well,” he said, lacing his fingers and stretching his arms overhead, “I have a proposition for you. I know it may sound like it’s coming out of left field, but I have given it a lot of thought, especially since I found out about the baby.”

  “What is it?” she asked, getting a chill in spite of the warm summer breeze tickling her skin.

  “I know the kind of mother you want to be. You’ve told me dozens of times.”

  He was right; she had. She wanted to be the cookie-baking mom who attended every dance recital and soccer game and volunteered for school field trips. That was before, when her only focus was her family. Things were different. She had the inn and the foundation to consider as well, and she didn’t want to let her Aunt Sharon down.

  As though he could read her thoughts—just like in the old days—he said, “You can’t deny that’s going to be tough with this place to run, the renovation to complete, the foundation—”

  “What are you getting at? If you’re suggesting I sell the inn again, I already told you that’s not going to happen.”

  “Would you consider a partner?”

  Shock rendered her momentarily speechless. “What are you talking about?”

  “I’d like to buy half the inn, or forty-nine percent, if you would feel better retaining controlling interest.”

  She rubbed a hand over her heart when it raced. “What are you talking about? Why would you want to do that?”

  “It makes perfect sense, if you think about it. I know business. Granted, I don’t have experience in the hospitality industry, but my M.B.A. gave me a good foundation for whatever business I choose to pursue.”

  After Bolton Industries had been sold, Eve knew her ex-husband would look for other opportunities before long. She just never expected him to knock at her door. She couldn’t deny he was a brilliant business man and having him on board would alleviate a lot of her stress, but could she really work with the ex she still loved and was about to share a child with?

  “I know it’s a lot to consider.”

  With a harsh laugh, she asked, “You think?”

  “It could be the answer for all of us, sweetheart.” He visibly tensed when she frowned at his term of endearment. “Sorry, old habits die hard.”

  “It’s okay.” It wasn’t. She didn’t need him to remind her of their past that was already impossible to forget.

  “Think about it. Allowing me to manage the day-to-day operations would ease some of your burden.”

  Eve couldn’t deny he was right. She wondered how her aunt would feel about that arrangement. She honestly didn’t think Sharon would object. If Eve hadn’t asked Alex for a divorce, they may have run the inn together anyways. “I don’t know…”

  “You’re not saying no,” he said, flashing straight white teeth that still made her toes curl. “That’s a start.”

  “You’ve given me a lot to think about,” she admitted, her mind racing. He would be there all the time, her partner, a full-time father to their child. She would come to depend on him once again, and that scared her.

  “This would allow you to manage the foundation and still spend time with the baby.”

  While she wouldn’t admit it, child care was one of her biggest concerns. She didn’t want a stranger raising the baby she’d been so desperate to have. “Sharon left the inn to me. I know she never intended for me to sell even a part of it.”
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  “You know how much I love this place,” he said, tipping his head and looking at her out of the corner of his eye. “It has so many great memories for us. Even more so now.” He glanced at her flat stomach.

  Eve felt her cheeks catch fire, and she was grateful it was too dark for him to see. “I know, but—”

  “I loved Sharon too, Eve. I hope you know that.”

  He earned back another little piece of her heart with that comment. She knew it was true. “I know you did. She loved you too.”

  “I want to do everything in my power to keep her memory alive here. For her, for you, and for our baby. I want our son or daughter to know what an amazing woman your aunt was.”

  Eve was glad to hear that, especially since she was considering his offer. “Thank you for saying that. I just need some time to think about this. Can we talk more about it tomorrow?”

  Alex smirked. “Does that mean you’re offering me a room for the night?”

  “Sure,” she said, getting to her feet. “Let’s get you set up. I’d really like to turn in—” Before she could finish, he pulled her into his arms. Her breath hitched when she saw the intensity in his eyes under the glow of the full moon.

  “I want you to promise me you’re going to take better care of yourself.” He brushed the back of his hand over her cheek. “You and this baby mean everything to me. I can’t let anything happen to either one of you.”

  Her heart swelled with love for him, and she didn’t know how she would ever work with him day in and out without telling him how she felt. “Nothing will happen to us.” She wouldn’t let it. She’d been waiting too long to allow a cruel twist of fate to take her baby away from her.

  Leaning his head against her forehead, he said, “Promise me you’ll get plenty of rest, eat well, avoid stress…” He grinned. “That’s it. That’s all I know.”

  Looping her fingers through the belt loops of his worn jeans, she matched his smile, allowing the simple pleasure of sharing that moment with him to wash over her. “I can see I have a lot to teach you about pregnancy.”

  Brushing a quick kiss across her cheek, he said, “Good thing I’m a quick learner.”

  ***

  “Are you out of your mind?” Dan demanded, barging into Eve’s office. “You can’t seriously be considering this.”

  Eve wasn’t in the mood to endure another one of Dan’s tirades. He’d been on edge ever since he learned she was pregnant. “What are you referring to?” She tried to stay calm. She was trying to deal with a construction crisis after a bout with morning sickness, and the last thing she needed was to go toe-to-toe with him.

  “I just overheard your worthless ex tell Jane he offered to buy half the inn.”

  “Perhaps you shouldn’t eavesdrop on private conversations.” She still adored her old friend, but remaining patient with him was getting difficult when he seemed so determined to dictate every decision she made.

  “Don’t tell me it’s true,” he said, bracing his fists on the desk and looming over her. “Tell me he was just blowing smoke again.”

  “Alex did make me an offer, and I’m seriously considering it.” In fact, she’d thought about little else. The more she thought about it, the more his proposal seemed like the answer to her prayers. Just delegating the construction project to him would be a blessing. Alex would be able to handle errant contractors with no problem, especially after some of the business tyrants he’d dealt with over the years. He didn’t possess her softer side, at least not in business, and it seemed as if everyone who crossed his path sensed that and gave him a wide berth.

  “How could you betray your aunt that way?”

  Eve’s head snapped up, anger swiftly displacing her frustration. “Excuse me?”

  “She left this inn to you to run. You haven’t even been at it a month, and already you decide you can’t hack it? You need your hero to ride in and rescue you?”

  The derision in his voice turned her stomach. She’d never seen that side of Dan. He’d always been so loving and compassionate toward her, offering unwavering support. “I don’t need your permission to sell half the inn. It’s my decision.”

  “Are you sleeping with him again? Is that when he threw this idea out there, when he had you back in bed and right where he wanted you?”

  Shocked that he would be so disrespectful, Eve asked, “How can you—”

  “You have thirty minutes to pack your shit and get out before I kick your ass!” Alex filled the doorway, his hand fisted at his sides.

  “Go to hell, Bolton,” Dan shot back without sparing a glance over his shoulder. “I don’t take orders from you.” Dan glared at Eve. “I should’ve known you weren’t strong enough to stand your ground with him. You’re not half the woman your aunt was.”

  Tears burned the back of her throat, but Eve refused to give in to them and lifted her chin. “I don’t care what you think. I’ll run this business as I see fit. If you don’t like it, there’s the door.”

  “You really think I’m gonna stick around now that I know there’s nothing in it for me?” Dan asked, crossing his arms.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Eve asked, holding her breath when Alex took another step into the room. She knew he was a heartbeat away from taking a shot at Dan, and that was the last thing she needed.

  Dan hesitated, as though he was trying to get his anger under control. His expression softened when he said, “We were meant to be together. If anyone should be running this inn with you, it’s me. Not him. Why can’t you see that?”

  His words settled in on Eve, crushing her as she faced the harsh reality. It was time for her and Dan to part ways. Time to say good-bye to another part of her past. “This is what I want, Dan. I know you may not understand that, but you don’t have to. It’s my decision.”

  Dan rounded the desk. “Just gimme a chance to prove to you how good we could be together, Evie. You can’t tell me you forget what it was like.” He bent down, touching her leg as he silently pleaded with her to look him in the eye. “We were incredible together, in and out of bed.”

  “You worthless piece of—” Alex moved in on Dan, but Eve held up her hand to stop him.

  “Please, we need to have this out, Alex.” She was amazed her voice sounded so strong and steady when she was crumbling inside. “So, you knew I was thinking about leaving Alex, and you thought I’d divorce him and fall in love with you?” It hurt to think he’d had an ulterior motive for standing by her side during Sharon’s illness. She wanted to believe Dan loved and respected Sharon as much as she did, that he considered her family, now she wasn’t so sure.

  Dan moved in closer, lowering his voice when he said, “Say whatever you want for his benefit, but we both know if you hadn’t gotten pregnant when you did, you and I would have found our way back to each other.”

  “That’s it,” Alex said, grabbing the back of Dan’s shirt. “Get the hell out of here before I throw you out on your sorry ass.”

  Alex was a big man, outweighing Dan by at least forty pounds. Despite Dan’s posturing, Eve could sense he was taking the threat seriously.

  “I’m not leaving until Eve asks me to,” Dan said, planting his feet shoulder width apart as he braced his hands on his hips and stared down at Eve.

  Eve gripped the edge of her desk. “We can’t be just friends and we’ll never be anything more. I’m sorry, but you don’t belong here anymore, Dan.”

  The rage that had been simmering beneath Dan’s calm facade for years finally erupted. “You stupid little—”

  Alex wrenched Dan’s arm behind his back, making him wince. “Finish that sentence, and I’ll break your arm.”

  Clenching his teeth, Dan said, “I’ve worked here for years. This is my home. If Sharon was gonna leave this place to anyone, it should’ve been me.”

  “But she didn’t.” Eve said, knowing how important it was for her to stand her ground so Dan wouldn’t even think about coming back. “She left it to me, and that means it’s
up to me to hire and fire people as I see fit.”

  Silence fell as Dan glared at Eve. “So you’re firing me?” He sneered. “You really think this guy is gonna be there for you? When has he ever put you first? You think it’s gonna be any different just because you have a kid together?”

  “I trust Alex,” Eve said, surprising herself with the conviction in her voice. She realized she did trust him to be there for her and their baby.

  “He’ll never be half the father I could’ve been to that baby.”

  Dan’s eyes drifted to Eve’s stomach and she almost felt sorry for him. “That’s why you suggested I try to pass the baby off as yours?”

  “If I’d ever found out about it”—Alex’s voice was a menacing whisper in Dan’s ear—“I would’ve come after you. Consider yourself lucky Eve turned you down, because trust me, it wouldn’t have been worth the price you would have had to pay for trying to steal my kid.”

  “Let him go, Alex,” Eve said, locking eyes with the man she loved. Picking up the phone, she pressed a button to connect her with the security office. “Hi Pat, it’s Eve. I’d like you to escort Dan off the property. He’s no longer on staff.”

  “This is really what you want?” Dan asked, clenching his fists as he broke free of Alex. “Fine, but don’t come crying to me when he breaks your heart again.”

  ***

  Seeing Eve in so much pain killed Alex. “I’m sorry,” he said, not knowing what else to say when they were finally alone.

  “Why? You warned me about him all along. You said he couldn’t be trusted. I guess you were right.” Her hand trembled as she reached for a folder on the corner of her desk. He could tell she was determined not to let her guard down with him. “He wasn’t interested in being my friend. He wasn’t there for me because he loved my aunt. I’m not even sure he ever loved me.”

  Alex had always known Dan wanted to take Eve away from him, but he never imagined it would go down this way. “Don’t let him get to you. He’s not worth it.”