“Too?”
“Yeah. Too. Because you’re great with the kids—” and you kiss like an angel, if angels kissed “—and you’re patient—”
He smiled. “Not that patient.”
“—and you’re kind, and...and, well. A lot of things that aren’t good.” His hands had slipped around her waist. And underneath her sweatshirt. Just a hair. Just enough. Oh, hell, she thought, her forehead dropping to his chest. His lovely, solid, so-good-smelling-she-wanted-to-eat-him-up chest. “Because they are. Because you are.”
“Haven’t had our coffee yet, have we?”
“How could you tell?” Her face flushed again. “Aside from, um...” She covered her mouth.
And he uncovered it and kissed her again. Lightly. Smiling. Like this was the best morning of his life.
Not that it didn’t rank right up for her, too. But she had to ask...
“Why?”
“Because...you’re you,” he said simply, holding her, making her feel safe, and her heart melted. Among other things. “Because you say what’s on your mind—” not everything, buddy...not even close “—like you’re not even a woman at all.”
“I’m going to assume that’s a compliment.”
“Hell, yeah. Even so... I wasn’t going to do that.”
“Do what?”
His hand traveled up her back, making nice. “Make the first move. Because I’d promised myself that—if there was ever a that—was up to you.”
Right. She knew that. Although he didn’t know she knew that. So all she managed to say was “Huh.” Because, no coffee. Also, screaming hormones—
“But I couldn’t help it, I had to let you know... Well. You know.”
“Mo-om!”
With a backward spring worthy of an high diver, Kelly jettisoned from the make-believe that was Matt and her getting cozy in the laundry room and back to her single-mom, two-kids, no-time-for-shenanigans reality.
“Be right there, just getting stuff out of the laundry!”
A slight smile flickered across Matt’s mouth before he briefly touched Kelly’s cheek, then started up the stairs.
Whistling.
Whew, close, Kelly thought, stacking the baskets and lugging them back to her apartment. Where, from his perch on one of the bar stools, Coop frowned at her. “Mom? Why are you smiling like that?”
Oops.
* * *
Fortunately, over the next couple insanely busy days, Kelly’s hormones settled back into their accustomed coma and she could see the madness that had transpired in the laundry room for the folly it was. True, as follies went, kisses ranked pretty low on the scale—she wasn’t fourteen, for crying out loud. But there were kisses that really were only kisses, and kisses that winked and said, “This is only a hint, baby.”
A hint of things she had a strong feeling would be nothing like things she’d experienced before. Meaning maybe her hormones weren’t quite as comatose as they’d have her believe.
Little rotters.
The oven timer beeped. Hauling herself out of la-la land, Kelly extracted a couple test pans of hors d’oeuvres she was thinking about serving for the Thomases’ anniversary party the following night, and slammed shut the oven door with her hip. Cheese bubbled and shrimp sizzled, making her smile. Lookin’ good, she thought, laying the pans on racks on the counter. Since this party was at the couple’s house—a million-dollar number in the chichi part of town—she’d do most of the actual cooking on-site, anyway, so testing it in her certified kitchen wasn’t a priority. And, anyway, the new range Matt had installed wasn’t exactly shabby. High-end, no, but definitely a solid, reliable product.
Just like Matt.
Jeez, Louise...
A thousand times she’d told herself she would not pick up the gauntlet he had thrown down. Or even look at it. Or think about it, sitting there. Taunting. Only then she’d remember his touch, that kiss, so sweet it made her girl parts sigh—yes, still—and she’d find herself taking the tiniest peek to see if the gauntlet was still there.
Like where was it going to go...?
Out front, she heard a car pull up behind her van in the driveway. The windows were set too high to see—annoying, that—but a second later her phone rang.
“I’m here,” her mother-in-law said. “Do I use the front door?”
“No, follow the path around to your left.”
Seconds later Lynn bustled inside, tucking her leather driving gloves in her hobo bag. Only woman Kelly knew who could make mom jeans and ballet flats look chic. “I know, I know, I’m early. Hope that’s not a problem?”
“Of course not,” Kelly said, giving her a hug. “Although Linnie’s asleep and Coop’s not out of school for another hour—”
“Oh, my God, what smells so good?”
Smiling, Kelly took the purse, as well as Lynn’s heavy cardigan, and set them on a nearby chair. “Test runs for tomorrow’s shindig. They’re in the kitchen, help yourself. Although they’re right out of the oven, so still hot—”
“Hot is good,” Lynn said, making a beeline for the tiny kitchen, delicately piling an assortment on a napkin plucked from the holder on the breakfast bar.
“There’s coffee, too,” Kelly said. “Mugs are in the cupboard over the maker.”
“Great.”
A moment later, amidst a gasp or two as she tried chewing the morsels before they’d cooled, Lynn returned to the living room, napkin in one hand, mug in the other, her eagle eyes missing nothing.
“When you said ‘basement apartment,’ I have to admit, I was skeptical. Because I think of that god-awful place Jack and I had off Second Avenue in lower Manhattan, when we were first married. Casa Cucaracha.” She shuddered. “But this is lovely, really. So much light! And the colors you’ve used—like those shows on TV. And these—” she hoisted the appetizer-laden napkin, rolled her eyes “—fantastic. Whatever these people are paying you, it’s not enough—”
“What’s going on, Lynn?” Kelly said, sitting on the arm of the chair where she’d put her mother-in-law’s things. Because not only was Lynn never early for anything, the praisefest was also a little much. Even for her.
Lynn’s gaze wrestled with Kelly’s for a moment before she released a sigh, then lowered herself to the edge of the sofa, setting her goodies on the coffee table. “Smart, too,” she said on a short laugh, then folded her hands on her lap. “Did Coop mention our phone conversation the other evening?”
Kelly snorted. “As if. Very private person, our Coop. Then again, since I knew it was you, I figured it was okay to give him his space.”
Lynn glanced around as though the child might materialize out of thin air. “And you’re sure he won’t be home yet?”
“Since he can’t get here unless I pick him up, very. Lynn...?”
Sighing, she fluffed her bangs, then toyed with a gold bangle on her wrist. “Okay.” Another sigh. “He told me about you and Matt holding hands. When you were at the park.”
“What? Oh. Crap.”
“Now, you don’t have to explain anything to me—”
“Yes, I do. Because it wasn’t that kind of holding hands. Matt had told me something about his ex that ticked me off, that she’d cheated on him, and I felt bad, so I... It was one of those I-understand kind of things, that’s all. As a friend—”
“And now who’s talking too much?” Lynn said, chuckling when Kelly stopped, mouth open. “Like I didn’t know why you interrupted me a minute ago?”
Kelly’s mouth flattened. Although what were the odds that Lynn would attribute the blush to the oven’s heat? “I didn’t think Coop saw—he and Aislin were twenty feet away, and we’re talking ten seconds, tops—but if he’d asked me about it, I would’ve told him the same thing. And why on earth did he talk to you and not
me?”
“Because I was a convenient sounding board would be my guess,” Lynn said gently. “I doubt there’s any more to it than that.”
Maybe. Maybe not. “Was he...upset?”
“More...trying to process, I think. Which is why I decided to say something now.”
“And as I said—”
“I know what you said. That’s not the point.”
“What’s not the point?”
She smiled. “Whether you’re telling me the whole truth or not.”
“I...” Kelly frowned. “What?”
Lynn laughed again. “Sweetheart, I’m not judging. Why would I? It’s like I said to Coop, I don’t know. But...I saw how Matt was around you at the funeral. How he was with the children.” She picked up her coffee again, her mouth twitching. “How red your face is now. Oh, for God’s sake, honey... It’s been more than two years. Time to move on, don’t you think?”
“Lynn, I...”
“No. It’s taken me nearly a week to work up to this, so now you listen.” She lowered her eyes to the mug, tapping the handle with one finger, then said, “I never said anything, but when you asked Rick for a divorce...” Her gaze lifted to Kelly’s. “Even though I saw what he was doing to you and the children, I was not happy about it. Because I felt like you’d given up on him. On what you’d had.”
“But...I thought you said—”
“That you’d fought for your marriage, I know. This wasn’t about logic, which is why I kept my trap shut. You had no choice, I get that. I got it at the time. But, see, I knew how Rick would react. And as his mother...”
Her eyes filled, bringing tears to Kelly’s. “Well,” Lynn said with a slight smile, “you know how that goes. However, it wasn’t up to you, or me, to fix him. He was a grown man, capable of making his own choices. And you had to put the babies’ welfare first, which you’ve always done. Are still doing—”
“Exactly. And what you don’t know—” Kelly sighed “—is that I overheard a conversation between Matt and Coop, after he talked to you. Kid came right out and asked if Matt ‘liked’ me.”
Lynn’s brows lifted. “And?”
“And...after saying he did, but as a friend, Matt admitted he’d like to be more. To all of us.”
“And was this a surprise?”
Another wave of heat washed through her. “No. But,” she said to Lynn’s chuckle, “he also reassured Coop he was waiting for a cue from me. Not in those words, but close.”
“And is he going to get that cue?”
“I’m not exactly in the position to give him one, am I?”
“Then let me rephrase that. Do you want to?”
“It’s not about what I want—”
“And why not?”
“Because, for one thing, Coop’s been through enough in the past little while, don’t you think? And if you could have heard him, confronting Matt like a little bulldog hell-bent on protecting me...” She shook her head. “And even if that weren’t the case—” her sigh was rough enough to hurt “—Rick made me believe he’d take care of me, a promise I ate up like candy. A promise that nearly destroyed both of us. I will never put myself, or another man, in that position again.”
“So you’ve decided to martyr yourself to the idea of some...some idealistic idea of womanhood that doesn’t need men?”
“Martyr’s maybe a little strong. But after everything I went through—”
“I know what you went through. I was there, remember? And I saw this little mouse of a girl blossom into something I frankly wouldn’t have thought possible even five years ago. But—and this is my point—don’t confuse your newfound strength with never needing male company, if you get my drift.”
Kelly barked out a laugh. “Says the woman who never married after her husband died.”
“Oh, honey...” This time Lynn’s laugh was rich. Full. “True. But for one thing, that doesn’t mean I’ve ruled out the possibility. And for another...” Her eyes sparkled. “It doesn’t mean I’ve taken the veil, either. Sweetie, I’ve had a lover for years.”
“What?”
“You heard me. We have an...arrangement that suits us both,” she said to Kelly’s obviously stunned expression. “For now, at least. And trust me, no one was more shocked that I was, when this...opportunity presented itself and I realized I was game. That I still wanted a man’s companionship. A man’s touch. And that I could have that without losing my autonomy.”
“And... Wait. Nobody knew?”
“Not a living soul.”
“Not even Rick?”
“Are you kidding? Especially not Rick.”
“Wow. This is... Wow.” Kelly squinted. “Does this man have a name?”
“Of course. But I’m not telling. Not yet. And no, before your brain runs amok, he’s not married. And he’s nobody you know.” She chuckled. “Like I said. I have no idea what is or isn’t going on between you and that sweet, hunky landlord of yours. And I do understand your need for independence. And to protect the kids, before you get on my case about that. But believe it or not, you can do, and be, all those things and still have a little fun. To enjoy being wanted,” she said with a coy little hitch of her shoulders. “Isn’t it wonderful that women can write their own stories however they wish these days?”
Kelly crossed her arms. “And if I want to write mine without a hero?”
Lynn gave her an inscrutable look, then shrugged again. “If that’s what your heart’s telling you, then fine. Only you know what’s best for you—”
“It’s not only about what’s best for me. Or even the kids. Because Matt...” Blinking, she glanced away, then back. “I’m simply not strong enough for another relationship.”
“Oh, please... Nobody’s talking caterers and wedding gowns here. What’s wrong with a little fling?”
Kelly choked on her laugh. “You can’t be serious.”
“Why not? Did it ever occur to you that maybe you deserve that? And, anyway...who’s to say Matt’s not strong enough for both of you...?”
“Don’t even go there, Lynn. Because I’m sure as hell not. Not again. Not ever.”
“And if you don’t, how will you ever know when you’re strong enough? Huh? And look who’s awake!”
With a this-isn’t-over-yet glance at Kelly, Lynn set down her coffee and held her arms out to Aislin, who was standing—well, wobbling was more like it—at the end of the hallway, yawning hugely and practically strangling Stripes, the monkey. Then a big smile bloomed across the flushed little face as she ran to her grandmother and crawled into her lap.
“Oh, my goodness,” Lynn said, palming Aislin’s damp curls, “somebody’s all sweaty from her nap!”
“Yeah, she usually is,” Kelly said, thinking, A reason to get out of here, yay. “Hold on, let me get some fresh clothes.”
Although, she mused as she trekked to Aislin’s mint-and-rose room, it wasn’t as if she’d left her jumbled thoughts in the living room. Or that she could change them for fresh ones like the baby’s clothes. Although by the time she left to pick up Coop from school—having left her girl child in her adoring grandmother’s very capable hands—most of the jumble had begun to fade enough for Lynn’s last words to flash in her brain like a Times Square billboard:
And if you don’t, how will you ever know when you’re strong enough...?
Which was pretty much what she’d told herself the other evening, wasn’t it? Except there was a big difference between feeding the man spaghetti and cookies and getting naked with him.
Shuddering, Kelly pulled into the queue of cars waiting for the bell and rolled down the window for some much needed fresh air. Not that her mother-in-law didn’t have a point, but...there was another person involved here. A person who’d been badly stung, who’d clearly wanted the whole enc
hilada before, and Kelly highly doubted that had changed. So Matt would probably scoff at the very idea of a...fling. A word, let alone a concept, she found pretty darn scoff worthy herself, actually.
Because she was so not a fling...er.
Then she and her girl parts remembered that kiss, and she thought, Hmm.
The school bell rang, piercing her thoughts. Kelly propped her elbow on the steering wheel, her head nestled in her hand, as wave after wave of shrieking kidlets poured like lava toward the pick-up lane. She smiled when Coop reached the van and clambered in behind her.
“Where’s Linnie?” he asked over his seat belt’s comforting click.
“With Grandma. She got here early. You and Linnie are spending the weekend with her, remember?”
“Oh, yeah, huh.”
Kelly waited until they’d pulled away from the school and the traffic had thinned out before she said, “So she tells me you guys had a rather intense chat the other evening. When we got home from the park?”
“Oh?” Silence. Then he asked, “What did she say?”
“That you saw Matt and me holding hands and didn’t quite know what to think.”
“Oh.” She heard shuffling behind her. “S’okay, it’s no big deal.”
“That’s not what Grandma thought,” Kelly said carefully. No answer. “Honey...first off, anytime you see or hear something you don’t understand, I’m here. You can talk to me about anything—”
“I know.”
“Well, remember that. And second...you’re right. It wasn’t any big deal. Matt had told me something that made me feel badly for him, so I was...showing my support. That’s all.”
“So you don’t want him to be your boyfriend?”
Oh, brother. Even over the traffic noise, she heard the worry in his voice. Heard her heartbeat thrumming in her ears. “It doesn’t... I don’t...” She cleared her throat, frowning at the car ahead of her. “Matt and I are just friends, sweetie.”
“Yeah, that’s what he said, too.”
“Then there you are.”
Kelly couldn’t quite tell, but she thought he might have sighed. “Did you make more cookies?”
The Real Mr. Right Page 14