by Sheri Lynn
But life had to throw her another curveball. Realizing she couldn’t remain idle and she must get going in a totally different direction because she didn’t have the luxury of time—she may have lost Trevor before she left Roatán—damn, an impediment materializes.
In the form of returning to her birthplace. Something she swore to never do.
She knew better. Home represented a pandora’s box. Whether she had good intentions or not, she should stay as far away from it as possible. Certainly not open it. Because her life would never be the same. Her intuition told her as much.
She always believed in destiny. Obviously, hers would not include a man who loved her, especially one who loved her unconditionally. It centered around and would forever revolve around Hidden Lake trailer park. And there was no lake. Nothing but a mosquito-infested pond.
Located two hours from the closest airport and accessible only by driving two lane roads centered between vegetable and cotton crops, Sophia drove the familiar roads to Durkinville. The roadside stands were one positive. It had been years since Sophia had boiled peanuts. She purchased the largest bag she could and nibbled on them as she drove. Nervous energy. She had so much of it her entire body ached.
Sophia sensed it deep within. Inside her bones and joints and her irritable stomach. She needed to turn around. This visit would alter her life forever. She knew it. It devastated her thinking how close she had come to contacting Trevor and throwing caution to the wind. She almost had it all.
Sitting outside the dilapidated, should be condemned trailer, with cats and kittens crawling out from under the missing skirting, Sophia debated. Everything. She recognized once she went inside, she and Trevor would never be. Her life would change forever, as would her lifestyle. In what way, she didn’t know. She hadn’t agreed to anything. She knew it would cost her. Even if just financially. And she realized no matter what transpired, she couldn’t be selfish. Abigail had a child. And Sophia must put the baby first.
She sunk low in her seat and sobbed. Why, when she finally silenced her past and committed to a future beyond it, did it seep inside her pores rearing its ugly head and take possession of her?
No point in postponing the inevitable. Rip the band-aid off quick. Right.
Opening the car door, drenched in the typical humidity of the South in August, the equivalent of leaving a hot shower and turning your blow-dryer on high, she left the vehicle. The parts of herself that had risen above and somewhat healed from her unhealthy childhood fading as she walked.
One step at a time. One reluctant foot in front of the other. No need to knock, the unhinged door coasted between the creaky, unsafe deck, the tattered living room carpet and the excessive volume of some game show on an old console television.
Stepping back in time. She walked into her past. Dirty. The stained couch with the wooden armrests. Her mom’s worn recliner with the side table covered in beer cans and cigarette ashes.
“Mom,” she called.
“There you are. We’re in the kitchen,” her mom responded.
The place stunk of stale cigarette smoke. And the temperature inside matched that of outside. “Why don’t you have the air on? It’s stagnant and stifling in here.” Sophia plodded toward the kitchen. Between the outdated wood spindles atop a half wall she saw her mom sitting at the rusted aluminum table with Reba.
“I don’t turn it on during the day. Only to sleep. Keeps my electric bill down.” Her mom didn’t get up out of her seat. She waved toward the fridge. “Help yourself to a beer if you’d like.”
The urge to remind her mom of the time came at her hard. But why waste her breath. It might only be two in the afternoon, but her mom most likely started drinking hours earlier.
“Thank you for coming, Sophia. I didn’t know what else to do. And after talking it over with your mama it all made sense,” extended Reba without moving to properly greet her. As if they knew proper. But supposedly Reba requested her presence.
“Well, I’m here now. So, what’s the big emergency? I told Mom if you needed money for the funeral I would do it and I didn’t need to come here to take care of it,” Sophia goaded.
Her mom and Reba stared at one another in some secret understanding. Her mom spoke first. “Just go to the extra bedroom. You’ll understand then why you had to come.”
Sweat ran down Sophia’s back and beaded on her upper lip. She didn’t have the patience for their cryptic games. Certainly, they didn’t have Abigail back there. Oh no. They couldn’t have a dead body waiting on the funds for a funeral. No. It had to be a tree that crushed the roof. Or…?
“Why don’t you just tell me what the hell is going on? Is Dad back there? Why are you two together anyway? You hate each other.” She pinned both women in a challenging glare. What the hell did they have back there? Another dead person.
Reba twirled her coffee cup between her hands sloshing some of the contents out onto the nasty table. She fixed her eyes on it avoiding Sophia.
“No, your dad ain’t in there. I’ll never let that man step foot in here again. He kicked Reba out. And in her time of grief and need. Now stop your sassing and do as we said,” her mom demanded.
The sooner she went and learned the basis of their urgent matter the sooner she could leave. Her heartbeats pounded in her ears and her fingers twitched as she started down the narrow hallway. Standing outside the ajar door she heard something. Something besides the noise of the box fan. Someone was in there. Babbling. A baby.
Craning her neck, she peeped inside the opening. A toddler stood inside a playpen holding onto the side. It didn’t see her as it faced the window looking outside. It wore only a diaper and its back and arms were a smooth, darker shade. It had a head full of black hair.
A million scenarios raced through her mind. Going back to the kitchen she mentioned the obvious one. “Abigail’s baby?”
Reba answered, “Yes.”
Bewilderment. Nothing else. Only bewilderment.
“Why all the mystery? I assumed you had me come out here to work out a child support agreement. Why is she here? Sophia couldn’t grasp the big picture. “Where’s the dad? Please tell me you didn’t kidnap her.”
“Don’t know about any dad. Abigail left home years ago. We didn’t hear much from her. She got all into drugs and partying. A few months back she showed up with that baby in tow. Craig kicked her ass out. He said he wouldn’t have some mixed breed living under his roof. She crashed with some shady people in a little place over on county road 82 and I’d bring her food and diapers.” Reba spoke without any emotion. She gazed at her cup, never blinking. “When I got the news about Abigail’s death. I went and brought Lily back here. I can’t keep her. She’s yours now. You take her and give her a good life.”
What? She couldn’t just take a baby. People don’t just give them away. And Sophia already had plans to make big changes in her life. They didn’t include a baby. She still held hope she and Trevor could and would be together. But it dwindled with each passing moment.
Reba turned tear-filled eyes to her. “Abigail always admired you. It’s what she would have wanted. I can’t keep her. Your racist father won’t let me. And even if I did…I can’t provide for her like you can. I don’t want her to turn out like her mother. Or me. Give her a chance to find a good man one day.”
“You can adopt her, Sophia. Raise her as your own. There’s no one to contest it. Go get you an attorney. We just need to get her out of here. If your dad finds out she’s here--,” her mom warned.
Sophia had no experience with babies. She didn’t even know if she wanted babies. Information overload. Her knees trembled and she slumped into the vacant chair. Could she consider this? She couldn’t not consider it. She couldn’t walk out, get in the car, fly home and never think about the baby—Lily, again.
Perspiration covered Sophia’s arms. She swore she watched it boil and vaporize on her skin. “Mom. You had that baby staying in this furnace of a home. Why can’t you turn on the air condi
tioning? This is miserable.”
“You always were a whiny thing. Only the window unit in my bedroom works. If I’m not back there I ain’t gonna run it,’ her mom countered.
She had to get out of there. Her chest constricted and either anxiety or the roasting temperature made it hard to breathe. And she wouldn’t leave a child in that. “Get her stuff together and load it in the car. Is the Shady Pines Motel still in business?”
Reba’s eyes went wide. “Yes. Yes, it is.” She sprung from her chair and rushed out of the room.
“I’ll take Lily with me for the night until we decide what to do.” Sophia looked at her poor excuse of a mother. No hesitation. Lily went with her until they figured it out.
Her Mom tipped her beer can, slurped the remainder, and crunched the can in her hand. “We already have the answers. But sure.” She tapped her cigarette on the edge of an ashtray. Most of the ash missed landing on the table.
Getting the child out of the smoke-filled, sweltering dump of a home was Sophia’s priority. Reba came around the corner with a diaper bag on her shoulder and the baby in her arms. Lily looked at Sophia and smiled.
Sophia’s heart missed a beat. It must have. Lily was absolutely beautiful. She had huge brown eyes. She reached her tiny hands out to Sophia. Without hesitation Sophia took her. Had she ever even held a baby?
“How old is she? Is she healthy? Does she have a regular physician?” probed Sophia. Lily touched Sophia’s hair, waving her fingers in it. Upon closer observation it appeared she could be of Latino descent.
Reba answered, “She is fifteen months old. As far as I know she is healthy. I doubt she has ever been to a doctor.” But Sophia knew everything she needed to know. Getting the perfect baby out of there and safeguarding she received a life of happiness that every child deserves became Sophia’s mission.
What had she done? Sophia had never been an impulsive person. When she finally does act on impulse, it involves a baby. She didn’t know the first thing about caring for a baby. Her first lesson occurred when she walked out to the car to leave the trailer.
Reba followed her out and told her to wait while she transferred the car seat. Car seat? Sure, Sophia knew people used them. She just didn’t realize she needed to.
Next Reba had her wait for her to run back inside and get the pack-n-play. After placing it in the trunk, Reba suggested she drive over to the small town of Pippin to purchase clothing and more diapers. How many diapers did a baby need overnight? So, staying nearby at the Shady Pines Motel didn’t happen. She drove the twenty-seven miles to Wal-Mart. She truly had no clue. Lily screamed through most of their shopping trip. She stood in the front seat of the shopping cart. Somehow, she screamed louder, ear-piercingly, when Sophia finally maneuvered her legs back into the appropriate slots.
Spotting a mother with her child, Sophia started to ask her what size clothing to buy. And who knew diapers came in a ton of brands and sizes? Not her. But she didn’t solicit the other lady’s assistance. She might assume Sophia kidnapped Lily.
Two hundred dollars later, her nerves shot, she decided to stay at one of the extended stay hotels at the interstate exit. She totally forgot about the interstate north of Pippin and Durkinville. She had come in south from the airport.
She requested a ground floor suite. Why, she had no explanation, but it must have been a once in a lifetime gift of clairvoyance. It had two bedrooms with a living area and a small kitchenette in the middle. Unloading items from the car became another unexpected adventure. She couldn’t leave Lily alone. Placing her on the floor in front of the television, she expected her to be there when she returned. No. She knew how to walk. Something Sophia hadn’t considered.
The next time she went to the car she took Lily with her. And because of it, it took more trips than it should have to get their things inside.
After she hoped the final trip outside, Sophia locked the door and sat on the couch pulling her knees into her chest. The events of the day coiled around in her head until she surrendered to the fact that she needed something for her massive headache.
Waddling from the window, the chair, kitchen, and coffee table, Lily had been entertaining herself. She lifted her arms as Sophia stepped around her and smiled. How could Sophia resist. She couldn’t. Scooping Lily up on her hip, Sophia smelled urine. “I guess if I can smell it…you need a fresh diaper.” She carried her to the room she placed Lily’s things in. Placing her on the bed and removing the saturated diaper weren’t the simplest tasks, she soon realized.
Lily grabbed her feet and rolled from side to side. She squealed and kicked each time Sophia tried to hold her still on her back. Getting the diaper under her and securing the sides before she wriggled out of her hold also made Sophia’s list of not as easy as one would think.
Watching Lily roll across the bed, one butt cheek fully exposed as the diaper favored one side of the child’s body, Sophia helped her off the bed. The curious baby went and started emptying things out of the diaper bag.
Sinking to the floor, her back against the mattress, Sophia’s mind spun out of control. She needed to make a list and formulate a plan.
Sophia had a baby in her care overnight. What about tomorrow? The next night? She took her for one night. Nothing more. She had to remove Lily from the heat and tainted atmosphere at her mom’s.
So, she and Lily took a trip to the drink machines. Lily cackled pushing the buttons. They ordered a pizza. Took a lukewarm shower together. Sophia couldn’t risk scalding the sweet girl’s flawless skin.
Stretched out on the couch between Sophia’s legs and the back cushion, Lily slept. And Sophia recognized how scared she really felt, but how fortunate she felt too. So, she Googled toddler care. She saved some attorney contacts in the area. She thought of Trevor. She cried.
She didn’t know how long she might need to stay in Durkinville. She didn’t know if she might be considering adopting Lily.
It hurt so much. She almost had it all. And she had been so stubborn and juvenile for so long that to finally decide she wanted a life with Trevor no matter what and to have to postpone it or give it up—she swallowed the colossal lump in her throat and gazed at the magnificent child resting beside her. Her focus couldn’t be anywhere else but on Lily for now.
For however long it took. Until she knew with complete certainty Lily received the love and care every child should have.
Chapter 14
Durkinville
Trevor
He made himself get a hotel room after he left Sophia’s office. He needed a shower and rest. He needed to sort out the news he’d received and how to proceed. Demanding answers and pushing Sophia too hard too fast were not the answers.
Thursday, he texted her. No surprise she didn’t reply. A couple hours after the text he called and left a basic voicemail. He told her he hated how they left things and asked for her to call him so they could talk. Again, no response.
He couldn’t imagine what occurred that incited her decision to return home. If her dad died, she wouldn’t go. If her mom died, maybe. But Molly said she went to see her mom. That didn’t mean she didn’t go to pay her last respects. He couldn’t be sure. Supposedly she had no other relatives alive. Again, he faced the dilemma of he didn’t know what transpired with her and anyone else over the last ten years. Parts of him screamed at him to go find her without hesitation as she might need him. Other parts yelled at him to be patient.
Molly texted him informing him she had nothing to report. Reading that and knowing how dedicated Sophia was to her career and company, he made the decision to leave the next day for Durkinville. He couldn’t recall if she ever told him the name of where she grew up. It did rattle him not receiving a response from her after leaving a text and a voicemail. He kept reminding himself what Molly told him. Sophia wanted him in her life. He didn’t need to know anything else except that.
Flying into Sophia’s home state, driving through the country without modern conveniences readily available, didn
’t bother him. He always enjoyed a simple life. Coming up on Hidden Lake trailer park told a slightly different story. He understood how one could be ashamed. But hell, she saw the poorer sections of Roatán. He supposed seeing such poverty and living in it were totally separate entities.
The park consisted of one u-shaped road. Mobile homes positioned along the outside and lining the middle. They were all in poor condition corresponding with the road. Old toilets, appliances, and trash rested in most of the lawns. Rusted bicycles and mangy dogs blocked the street. He had to weave left and right to avoid them.
He saw no visible numbers on any of the homes. He only had one option. Rolling down the passenger side window he called out to an elderly couple sitting on a rickety porch. “I’m trying to find Polly Conrad.”
The lady gave him the finger. He gathered they didn’t take too kindly to strangers.
The man spit tobacco out into the yard. “What fer? They done had nuff to deal with this week son.”
Inching the car closer and out of the road, Trevor put it in park and exited. “I’m a friend of her daughter’s. Sophia. I heard she might be here.”
The woman grumbled and threw her head to the side giving Trevor the brush off. “I’m a thinkin you heard wrong. Craig just buried one girl and ya gonna come all up in ere lookin fer da rich one.”
Craig buried a daughter. Sophia’s half-sister, Abigail. It saddened him to hear it. For Sophia.
“Rich bitch didn’t even come to da service. How’s dat for family,” the man added.
“Well, Marv, she always was such a homely, unhappy girl. She prolly knew our good lord took the wrong daughter.” The lady snickered, displaying her gums.
Trevor hated that Sophia might have returned there. Not only did she have horrible parents, horrible people inhabited the park. He needed to find her. So, he faked agreeing with them. “Yep. That hasn’t changed. I barely know Sophia but learning of Abigail’s demise I wanted to come and pay my respects.” It shocked him remembering Abigail’s name, but he racked his brain and couldn’t remember her mother’s name. He knew it began with an R. Sophia’s mother’s information was all he got from Molly. “Are Polly and … what’s Abigail’s mother’s name? Rhonda. I can’t recall. Are they still neighbors?”