by Dana Mentink
“Yes, it is, Shannon. Quit lying to yourself and to me.”
“I’m... I don’t want to have this conversation.”
He squared off and stoked up his courage. “Well, we’re gonna have it anyway. You are a woman who gets things done, who runs her schedule, owns her choices. You didn’t pursue the divorce because, on some level, way down deep, you want to stay married.” There. He’d said it aloud, and there was no going back.
She cocked her head, gazing at him, expression unreadable. Should he dare have hope that perhaps his boldness would break down the wall between them?
He waited, hardly daring to breathe, praying she would give him the answer he wanted.
* * *
Shannon’s stomach twisted, heart beating fast. Her mouth opened and then closed. You want to stay married.
The minutes seemed to tick away in slow motion as those blue eyes pierced her to the core. “You’re wrong, Jack.”
“No, I’m not, but if you want to delude yourself, that’s just fine. You called me from the hotel...”
“Because I was desperate.”
“No, because you know me, trust me. You always have.”
“That’s different than loving someone.” Wasn’t it?
And then he was on his knees, kneeling next to her chair, with an expression so earnest, it made her forget everything but how much she longed to be with him. “Right now, Shan. Look at me, right now, and tell me you don’t love me, and I’ll leave it alone. I’ll hang up my hat and never contact you again after this Dina mess is sorted out, and we’ll get that divorce.”
“I...”
“Right now.”
Her pulse whammed in her veins as he captured her gaze with his. “Tell me that you don’t love me anymore.”
I love you, I love you, her heart sang. Why couldn’t she let go of her self-control and tell him?
She picked up Annabell, though the baby was quiet, and held her close, nearly up to her chin. “Why are you pushing me?”
“I want the truth. Now.”
Annabell had nearly fallen asleep. Shannon stroked her head and looked out the window, into the moonlight, into the night.
“Now,” he said softly, reaching out and gently tipping her chin. “Tell me the truth. If you don’t love me, say so.”
“Jack...” she said.
He waited, tense with expectation.
“Jack, I...I can’t talk to you anymore. I have my plans, and I have to stick with them. Our marriage is over.” Then why didn’t her heart believe the words she’d just uttered?
“You aren’t a good liar,” he said, tracing a thumb over her mouth. “Your bottom lip crimps when you fib.”
She clutched his hand, and for a tick, she was overwhelmed with the urge to kiss him. Then she stood, breaking away, baby bundled to her like a shield. He stood, too, watching.
“You are my first love, and I’ll always feel something for you, but not the kind of love you need for a marriage.” It was the truth she’d told herself daily, for the last seven years. “I was young. We both were. Life has changed. I have changed.”
“You’ve outgrown me?”
“No, I...well, I want different things.”
“Uh-uh. You want the same thing, to be a doctor. Well, you know what? You can be a doctor and stay married to me, Shan.”
She looked at him full on, and she did not see anger in his face, just a sweet, desperate longing that gradually began to fade, second by second.
“So that’s it?” he said finally.
“That’s it.”
The silence lengthened between them, miles she could not cross, a universe in the few feet.
“You know,” he said at last, shoving his hands in his pockets, “someday, when you’re done sprinting after everything you think you want—a thriving practice, accolades, money, success—you’re still going to have something missing.”
“What’s that?”
“Love. The kind your father didn’t give you.”
She jerked as if she’d felt a hot spark. “And you think you could give me that?”
“No, only God can love perfectly, but I sure would have done my best to love you every day, Shan.”
Her mouth opened and closed. In one quick movement, she stripped off the wedding ring and thrust it at him.
“No more, Jack. We’re done.”
He kept his hands in his pockets. “Keep it.”
Breathing hard, she clutched the ring, put the baby on her shoulder and fled without another word.
* * *
Shannon cried into her pillow, careful not to let anyone else hear, grateful that Evie, her roommate, had not yet come to bed. Waves of anger and grief washed over her intermittently. How could her choices be so bad? What exactly had she done wrong? She’d had a home in Gold Bar until she’d found another place to belong. She’d embarked on a hasty marriage, born out of a childish need, and then she’d recognized it was a mistake for both of them. She’d loved Jack, but not the way a spouse needed to. She’d grown up, replacing youthful desires with mature ones.
Someday, when you’re done sprinting after everything you think you want—a thriving practice, accolades, money, success—you’re still going to have something missing.
I’m not sprinting through life because my father didn’t love me, she wanted to scream at Jack. It was sheer arrogance on his part to assume he knew what motivated her, what she would or wouldn’t miss down the road. Yet doubt carved a trail inside her, etching against her certainty like sand eroding cliffs of granite. Was she running toward her future or away from her past?
I would have done my best to love you every day, Shan.
The rotten thing was, she knew he meant it, every syllable. What kind of fool was she to let him go?
Not a fool. You’re going to be a doctor, a great one, and that has nothing to do with Jack or Dad or anything else. She hopped out of bed and shoved the ring into the outer pocket of her backpack until she could figure out what to do with it.
Back in bed, she squeezed her eyes shut and willed sleep to come. Annabell would be up for her middle-of-the-night feeding in a couple of hours. With a start, she remembered that she had not checked her phone since dinnertime. Sitting up again, she fumbled for the bedside table and pressed the cell to life.
The little screen glowed in the darkness. It was not a message from Dina that greeted her, but from Larraby.
Phone number Dina called from hospital matches a former-known cell for Hank Brown, AKA Pinball. He’s her brother. Call me.
Shannon sat up, the covers falling away.
Hank Brown. Dina’s brother was the leader of the Aces. How could it be true when Dina was considered property of the Tide? When they’d heard rumors that Pinball’s people were out to snatch her? She called Larraby’s cell.
“If she’s made contact with her brother, Pinball,” Larraby said without preamble, “he’s going to come into town, gunning for the Tide. Have you heard from her?”
“No, not yet.”
“When she calls you, you have to loop us in.”
“She’s done nothing wrong.” She heard him wham a stack of papers down in frustration.
“You don’t understand the gang thing, do you? They are all about territory and pride and vengeance, wrapped up in a nice fat layer of macho. The Tides are on Ace territory, and if Dina tells brother dearest about how she’s been mistreated, they will come looking for payback, and they will not care about the collateral damage.”
Shannon could not muster an answer, so Larraby continued.
“Or worse, if Pinball can’t forgive his sister for going to the Tide in the first place, there may be truth to the fact that he’s trying to snatch her and hand her over to them. Keep his sister’s blood off his own hands. Either way, it doesn’t end well for her.”
�
�It makes no sense. Why would she have connected with the Tide in the first place?” Shannon said. “Her brother’s rival gang?”
“Rebellion, probably. Falling out with the brother. What better way to get back at him than to find a home with his enemies?”
Shannon rubbed the spot between her eyes, where a headache was threatening to take hold.
“If she calls you, you have to let us know,” he repeated.
“What will you do to her?”
He was silent a moment. “Nothing.”
“But you’ll arrest her brother.”
“As soon as I see the first sign of violence. It will be the only way to stop World War Three.”
“Then the Aces will blame Dina. They’ll think she led her brother into a trap to help the Tide.”
“That’s not my problem. She made her decisions. She’s got to live with them.”
Shannon’s gaze drifted to the baby, sleeping peacefully with her little hands tucked up under her chin. “Annabell doesn’t deserve to be caught in the middle.”
“Then bring her to me. We’ll get her into protective custody.”
Tears pricked Shannon’s eyes. She knew it was the best thing, the safest thing, for the infant. Her heart ached at the notion of losing contact with the baby. It was a thunderclap to her soul to recognize the truth; she loved that little infant, the baby who demanded every bit of her intellect, patience and compassion. She loved a baby who wasn’t hers. With her career and her life in jeopardy, she loved a child the way her father never could.
The tears trickled now. Annabell had changed her in a way she could not fully understand in that moment. Larraby’s next words jarred her from her wonder.
“And another thing. Mason’s been sniffing around here in town. He left a couple of hours ago, but not before he got some answers to his questions.”
“Answers about what?”
“He was asking the old-timers at the café about the Thorns, their ranch.” He paused. “Got Jeb talking, and he can’t stop once he’s got an audience. Meg said he blabbed to Mason all about the fishing lodge.”
Shannon’s stomach knotted. “Oh, no.”
“If that’s where you are, Shannon, you’d better get out. Now. I have to go.” He clicked off.
Evie opened the door, eyes rounding in surprise to find Shannon staring at her phone.
“Bad news?”
She was already reaching for her backpack and the diaper bag. “We have to get out of here. Get Jack and Keegan.”
“Is it...?” Evie’s question died away as the phone began to vibrate in Shannon’s hand. She punched the button and answered.
“It’s me,” Dina said. “I’m here, and I’m ready to take Annabell back.”
FOURTEEN
Jack came running at his mother’s call, crowded near Shannon, with Evie at his elbow. Shannon put the call on speaker.
“Dina, why didn’t you tell me that your brother is Pinball?”
Jack’s jaw dropped. “Pinball? As in the leader of the Aces?”
A bad connection made it hard to hear Dina’s reply. “How’d you find that out?”
“Never mind how. The point is we did, and you didn’t tell us.”
“I wasn’t sure he’d talk to me at first. We had a pretty bad fight two years ago. That’s why I ran to the Tides. It was stupid, but it’s okay now. I told him I’d explain everything once I got Annabell back. He’s going to meet me.”
“You can’t trust him. He’s either going to deliver you to the Tide or kill you himself.”
“No, he won’t. You’ll see. I’m on a bus, about a half hour away.”
“Away from where?” Shannon demanded.
Jack listened to the background noise. Static? The sound of an engine? He could not tell. Two words punched through the white noise.
“The inn.”
Shannon almost lost her grip on the phone. “You can’t go there. The Tide’s people are still in town. They’ll...”
“What?” Dina’s voice cut in and out. “I don’t know what you’re saying. I’ll be there in a little while. Once my brother meets Annabell, everything will be okay. I can’t wait to see her.”
“Dina, no...” Jack said. There was no response, only dead air.
With a shaking finger, Shannon clicked off the phone. “There’s going to be a bloodbath. We have to call Larraby. My mother...”
Jack dialed Larraby’s number on his cell. While he waited to get through, he spoke to her. “Call your mom and uncle to warn them.”
Shannon dialed, but there was no answer. “It’s going to voice mail. They have the phones on silent for the night.”
“No cell phones?” Evie asked.
“They’ve never gotten comfortable with them.”
Jack tried to keep the fear off his face. Her mother, uncle and the guests would be helpless lambs in a slaughter.
Keegan popped his head in the door. “We’ve got a problem.”
“We’ve got dozens of them,” Shannon snapped. “What now?”
“Cruiser and his guys are coming up the mountain. They’re about fifteen minutes out.”
As the nightmare intensified, Jack took the phone from Shannon and disconnected.
“There’s no more time. Keeg, take Annabell and the women in the car. You can make it down the service road before they arrive. Call Larraby on your way.”
“What about you?” Keegan said.
“I’ll ride Lady, trail Prince behind.”
“No, Jack,” Shannon said. “You should come with us.”
He didn’t dignify the suggestion with a rebuttal. “Go.”
“You can’t go loping off by yourself with the Tide on their way up.”
His gut tightened to iron. “There is no way I’m leaving two horses here for the Tide to lay their hands on. End of discussion.”
“Hurry, then, Jack.” Evie scooped the baby from her crib and headed for the door. Keegan, snatching up his rifle, followed her.
Shannon trailed after Jack as he took his hat from the peg and zipped on a windbreaker.
“This is crazy. What if they catch you? You’ll be slow, trailing a second horse.”
He didn’t answer, so she grabbed at his arm. “I’ll ride Prince.”
“Uh-uh,” he said, brushing her off, shouldering his rifle. “You’ll go in the car.”
She gave him a full-on, chin-up, eyes-wide stare. “I won’t.”
He glared at her. “Knock it off, Shannon.”
“I’m coming. If you don’t want me riding, I’ll be hiking along behind you.”
He spoke through gritted teeth. “You don’t want to be in my life, remember? You just said as much.”
“I got you into this mess, and I’m going to see it through to the end.”
“Unnecessary. I’m a big boy. I don’t need you trying to take care of me out of a sense of guilt.”
“Not guilt. I promised. For better or for worse, until our marriage is dissolved.”
“It’s not really a marriage, not a real one.”
“It’s a contract. I’ll honor it until it’s null and void. I owe you that much.”
“Don’t do me any favors. This isn’t a debt to be repaid.”
“To me, it is.”
“Shannon Livingston, you’re nuts.”
“Shannon Livingston Thorn, for another few days, at least.” She checked her watch. “And now we’ve wasted four minutes arguing.”
He opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again and finally spun on his heel and marched toward the door. “It will take me a few minutes to saddle the horses,” he said over his shoulder.
She nodded. “All right. I’ll tell Evie and Keegan and meet you at the shelter.”
He stalked off without bothering to answer.
; The thought of Shannon riding Prince down a steep mountainside swarming with bikers intent on killing them made his blood run cold.
For better or for worse had just taken on a whole new meaning.
He forced himself to take it easy as he saddled Lady and Prince. No need to let them feel the tension that slammed through him.
Pinball.
The inn.
Cruiser.
And Shannon riding behind him through it as if they were best friends or something. Was she trying to torture him by ending things one moment and insisting on following him the next? When the horses were saddled, he was no more at ease than he had been, especially when Shannon showed up wearing Keegan’s baseball cap and a slicker two sizes too big she’d swiped from the closet. She looked so ridiculous, he had to laugh.
She fired him a haughty look and took the reins from his hand. They led the horses out of the fenced area. “Trail’s rocky in places, but wide enough.”
He offered her his cupped hands, and she climbed up into the saddle. “Is it wide enough for motorcycles?”
He swung onto Lady. “I’m hoping not to find out.”
They rode to the trailhead.
Lady’s ears pricked. Motorcycles? He didn’t stop to listen, but pushed on past the tangle of shrubbery, until they cleared the trail. He set a quick pace, and Lady seemed just as eager to leave the mountaintop as he was. On the way, he tried to calculate the timing. Keegan, Annabell and his mother would be halfway down the mountain, Keegan taking the logging road, which would steer them away from Cruiser and his men. Jack hated the thought of what Cruiser and his cronies might do to the old cabin.
At least they won’t be able to touch my horses. Shannon was keeping pace on Prince, though she was not at ease in the saddle. His mind ran ahead to the inn. If Pinball showed up, he’d likely bring some people with him, in addition to the three already there, even though he would probably not be expecting to run into the Tide.
But when he did...
He prayed Keegan had gotten word to Larraby to send police protection for Oscar, Hazel and the guests. Shannon had briefly filled him in on Larraby’s call, and he agreed that the safest thing for Annabell was to be far away from any gang altercation. Would the baby wind up in foster care, or be returned to Dina to live under the protection of one gang in place of the one that sought their lives? Rain drove into his cheeks, adding to the sting. Little Annabell. What kind of life was that for her?