Alex ran his fingers over the wall, in awe of the men who had cut the rocks so perfectly, then fit them together to form the great keep that had provided shelter for his family for seven generations. “I doona ken.”
“Clean the sand from yer ears, boy, and listen to me. See with yer heart, not yer eyes alone. Ye fear the unknown, nothing more. If ye truly wanted to go, ye would have never raised the sword in defense of our clan against the Sutherlands. And that woman—Keely Oliphant—she wouldna be here, either. Ye’re afraid of what the future holds—yet willing to hold on to the past.”
Alex was silent for a moment. “Ye’re a fool.”
“Nay. I’m a MacKay.” Mathe thumped his chest. “And so are ye.”
“Not by choice.”
Mathe stood directly in front of him now, his eyes narrowed.
Alex’s heart hammered as Mathe gripped his shoulders. “I doona know what gods ye worshipped in the heathen lands—what men ye served, but ye’re here now. Called home by the Almighty. Dinna ye see that, lad?”
See what? The remnants of his father’s life that was unfairly cut short? Or his brother, Laird John, also known as Gentle John? What legacy would Alex leave behind if he were laird of the MacKays? None. Because Alex wasna meant to be laird. He was a ruthless mercenary interested in one thing—gold. “I told ye before, old man, I’m a sellsword, not a bloody laird.”
Mathe raised his hand and slapped Alex’s cheek. Shock and rage swirled within Alex’s gut. The lingering sting from Mathe’s calloused hand deepened his anger. Their gazes locked, and Alex beat back the urge to retaliate. No man, not even his sire, had ever assaulted him so shamelessly.
“I am prepared to die.” Mathe dropped to his knees and bowed his head, pulling the length of his gray-streaked hair to one side, revealing the back of his neck.
“Why did ye strike me?” Alex growled.
“I acted on behalf of yer da. For never has a son of the Highlands acted so wretchedly. Ye are a selfish, lad, Alexander Joseph MacKay. I’d rather die than live to see the day this clan is destroyed from the inside-out.”
Alex huffed out a frustrated breath. Curse his birthright. Damn the Highlands. And to Hades with the beautiful past that sat abovestairs awaiting word on her future life. “Keep yer head, old man.”
Alex pivoted, taking in the details of his father’s solar—the hearth and mantle, shelves packed tight with manuscripts, the wood benches, padded chairs from Italy, the weapons hanging on the wall, and his ma’s tapestries. Nothing had changed, only him. He strode to the door, forced it open, and headed out of the keep. The only cure for his rage? A heedless mount unafraid of galloping blindly across the rock-ridden terrain Alex once considered home.
Chapter Eight
“What do ye mean she willna come down for the evening meal?” Alex blinked in disbelief, wondering if Leah had misunderstood Keely. “Did ye relay my message word for word?”
“Aye, milord, I did.”
“Not forgetting the part about carrying her down if I must?”
“Aye, I was sure to say so.”
Alex couldna accept more disobedience. First his council, and now Keely. “Are ye laughing at me, Leah?”
“Never, Laird Alex.” She gave a quick curtsey. “Lady Keely gave a firm answer. She has requested that I bring a tray to her room.”
“Did she bathe?”
“Aye.”
“Pick a gown from the ones I sent?”
“Aye.”
“So, she is ready for supper?”
“I even dressed her hair.”
“Ye’re dismissed, Leah. Leave the lady’s food to me.” Alex stomped up the curved, narrow stairs. Keely had no right to defy him. Neither did Mathe or Jamie, or the other captains on the council, or his many cousins, warriors, tenants, servants, or any other bloody fool who drank his wine and gorged themselves from the meat set upon his table.
“And when did ye start referring to anything in this keep as yer own?” he asked himself.
Arriving at Keely’s doorway, he quickly waved the two guards away. “Rest for a bit. I will watch over Lady Keely.”
The men thanked him and bowed.
Once they were out of sight, Alex turned back to the arched door. His sire had commissioned a famous saor from France to craft it. A unicorn lying in a bed of grass and thistle graced the top. Clan MacKay was written in Gaelic, English, and French underneath the scenery. His ma had adored the unusual wedding gift. Alex shook his sentimental thoughts off, and banged on the polished wood. “Lady Keely.”
When no answer came, he knocked again.
“Who is at my door?” Keely finally called out. She pretended not to know who stood outside her chamber.
“Alexander.”
“Go away.”
He clenched his teeth. How long could he endure this torture? How long was he expected to swallow his pride while his inferiors took advantage of him? Aye, he’d been gone for too long and understood it would take time for the clan to respect his authority. But this woman—this she-devil, this hellion, she wasna part of his plan. In no way had he agreed to deal with Keely.
“Open the door, Keely.”
Footsteps sounded. “Ye commanded me to stay in this chamber, Alex. And that’s what I intend to do.”
“Ye’ll come when ye’re called, woman.”
“Like one of yer beasts? Perhaps ye would have more success with the hounds who lie underneath yer table.”
“God so help me, Keely…”
“Ye’re beyond redemption, Alexander. Remember? Doona call upon the Almighty for patience.”
Unable to abide her sharp tongue any longer, Alex forced his way inside, causing Keely to stumble back as he entered the chamber. “What are ye trying to hide?” he asked, gazing about the generous space. “There will be no more secrets between us, Keely.”
She tilted her head back defiantly, her blue eyes blazing like the fire in the hearth. “I demand my freedom. Send me home.”
“Ye are home. Or did ye forget those vows in the kirk? Where ye pledged yer heart and body to John. And absolute obedience to this clan.”
“In name only,” she shot back.
“Tis that name that binds ye to me. To this keep. To these lands. By law, ye are a MacKay. Not an Oliphant.”
She swallowed hard, carefully contemplating her retort. “I am more Sutherland than MacKay. For I’ve lived at the earl’s pleasure much longer than I ever lived by yers.”
He growled as he launched himself at her. Hearing those words come out of her lovely mouth made him crazy. A slap in the face or a punch in the gut would have been less painful. He backed her into the nearest wall, then took hold of her chin. “Are ye a Sutherland whore?”
Her eyes grew wide. “Never.”
“Are ye a Sutherland spy?”
“Nay.”
“Are ye betrothed to one of the earl’s sons?”
“How could I be? Until today, I was married to John.”
“Then ye are a MacKay.” He released her chin, but didn’t back away. “I forbid ye from ever speaking that name in my presence. Under this roof, even. For no lady promised to a MacKay will ever claim to be connected to the Sutherlands.”
She nodded in acquiescence, thinking better of challenging him again. “What did ye mean by, ‘I am promised to a MacKay’?”
“The council agreed unanimously that ye must wed a MacKay in order to maintain clan honor. Ye left John, Keely, but ye’ll not do it again. Whatever man is chosen, he won’t be an inexperienced lad or a monk like my departed brother. He’ll be a man. And ye better believe he’ll demand his marital rights—even if a room full of maids have to hold ye down for it.”
A garbled sound came out of her mouth as she pushed him away. “Get out!” she screamed.
“Aye,” he said, almost regretting he’d caused the agony on her beautiful face. “Take the night to come to terms with yer fate, lady. Come tomorrow, after my brother is buried, we shall revisit this convers
ation.”
*
Keely would pray fervently that Alex had the sense to see how wrong he was about everything. That he’d change his mind and send word to her father. She’d rather face her sire’s wrath than spend another day inside the MacKay keep. Sadness had been heaped upon her since the moment she’d crossed their border.
Stripping off the wool gown, she laid it over the back of a nearby chair, then sat on the edge of the mattress, drawing her knees to her chest. In a fairer world, she’d have the freedom to go where she wished. But such a life dinna exist. She could only fantasize about fulfilling her girlhood dream of travelling—visiting Italy and France, perhaps to the exotic places where Alex had lived for so long—where the sun kissed the sand.
Just then, she heard a bell ring from outdoors and rushed to the single, narrow window in her room. It was wide enough to see down to the bailey where a small crowd had gathered as a man dressed in a black tunic and breeches called out the name of her departed husband as he rang the hand bell.
“Our kindly Laird John Simon Alexander MacKay was taken too soon,” the man said. “On the morn, he will be laid to rest in the kirk…”
Keely backed away from the window, disliking what the mort bell represented. Evil spirits were warded off by its sound. Keely remembered the same ritual from her mother’s funeral. The bell used in her ma’s procession had been baptized by the priest. The bell ringer headed the long line of mourners that would walk the three miles to where her mother wished to be buried.
Returning to the bed, she crawled to the center, tired but unable to keep bittersweet memories from flooding her mind. The very night Laird John had been told Keely had accepted his offer for marriage. He requested an audience with her in the women’s solar, with only an elderly, deaf maid serving as chaperone.
“Why?” he’d asked. “Ye belong to Alex.”
“If ye think so,” Keely countered, “then why did ye ask me to marry ye?”
John rubbed his noble chin. Unlike his brother, John’s features were softer, his eyes deep set and compassionate. Aye, warmth radiated from his strong body, but not the heat of passion that affected Keely whenever she stood in front of Alex. This wouldna be a marriage built on lust or love, it would be one of respect and appreciation. She could live with that only if she dinna have to see Alex every day.
“Do ye always answer questions with questions?” he asked.
“Only if I seek my own answers.”
John chuckled. “Alexander failed to claim ye. How could any man resist ye, Keely?”
As she’d been told by John’s father, her future husband had no idea that his sire had arranged for Keely to marry his eldest son, not Alex. The MacKays and Oliphants wished to unite in blood—and power. They’d been at peace for generations, so it seemed the natural thing to do. Keely’s sire had sent a missive, demanding her obedience and absolute silence.
Alexander is young, her father had written, he’ll recover, as will ye once a bairn grows inside yer belly. Make me proud, daughter, and I’ll reward ye and yer husband.
There’d been no recourse, she was an only daughter with six brothers. It would serve her family best if she married the heir to the MacKay clan, not the second son.
“May I kiss ye, Keely?” John asked. “To seal our betrothal.”
Keely gazed at the old woman who had fallen asleep on the stool in the corner. “Aye,” she said, appreciative of John’s gentle demeanor.
Expecting him to tug her into his arms, she closed her eyes, waiting impatiently to discover if he’d heat her blood the way Alex did. Much to her disappointment, John planted a kiss on her forehead first. And after she opened her eyes, staring up at him in complete disappointment, he gave her a chaste kiss on the lips.
“I look forward to our future life, Lady Keely.” He bowed, then left the solar.
Keely didn’t move for a long time. She touched her lips, regretful that nothing had sparked between them. John’s touch dinna awaken any feelings inside her, dinna raise gooseflesh on her arms. Tears formed in her eyes, but she quickly palmed them away. Feelings dinna matter. Keely would do her duty, solidify the alliance between her family and the MacKays, and hopefully, provide an heir. She’d focus on that to help get her through the hard times she knew she’d face concerning Alex. She loved him, completely. Wanted him. It would take time to forget him…
Keely returned to the present.
In five long years she hadn’t forgotten Alex. Not one night had passed without him invading her thoughts or dreams. Some of those dreams were disturbingly real and involved rigorous lovemaking, though she’d never seen Alexander naked, or ever been naked with him. Her fertile imagination made up for her lack of carnal knowledge of her beloved, for she could envision every inch of his muscle-graced body, the spark in his green eyes, even feel his strong fingertips tracing the contours of her own form.
Like most women, she craved passion. And there was no lack of talk from the married women or wanton maids that served in the Sutherland household. They described bedsport with as much enthusiasm as any man. But with Alex, she dinna need all the wooing—just him.
“Just him,” she repeated out loud.
What was wrong with her? Alex dinna like her—in fact, if she knew anything about the man she once loved, he might even hate her, which was hard to accept. “Tomorrow,” she whispered, “while the funeral is going on, I will leave this place—forever.”
Chapter Nine
Once the last warrior left the kirk, Alex sat down on one of the rough-hewn benches in the back. He’d suffered through the funeral mass, neither embracing or rejecting the words the priest had spoken in honor of his brother. Faith in anything but himself exposed Alex to weakness, and made it necessary for him to live within the boundaries of the church and law. He preferred owing allegiance to no one. It would make it easier to leave this place.
“Laird Alex,” Father Michael approached.
“I wish ye wouldna call me laird.”
“Why?” the priest asked. “Tis yer rightful title.”
Alex shook his head. “Mathe…” he said sourly. “The old man has been nipping at yer ear.”
The priest cleared his throat. “Captain Mathe spoke with me.”
“Aye. And I will tell ye the same thing I told him and the council. I have no desire to…”
“Yer soul is in jeopardy, milord. I am aware of yer many sins—murder—blasphemy, fornication—even greed.”
Alex chuckled at the last one. “Every Highlander is guilty of greed, Priest. Even the Pope is guilty of greed.”
Father Michael wobbled a bit, quickly seating himself on the bench. “Ye’d accuse the Holy Father of such a vice?”
“I’d accuse any man of wanting silver and gold, lands, and power. Tis inherent in every man born.”
“Christ was born.”
“Doona try to trap me by using my own words against me, Father Michael. Speak yer piece, then leave me to contemplate my own future.”
“The clan needs ye. The church…”
“Needs the annual donation my sire and brother generously sent to Rome?” Alex reached inside his tunic, pulling out a small leather pouch. “I willna deny ye what funds ye’ve honestly earned, Father. I’ll deny no man his living. Will ye?” He offered the priest the money.
Reluctantly, Father Michael accepted the pouch, placing it on the space between them. “Nay. God commanded every good man to toil.”
Alex scrubbed his face. “Tis good to know the Lord willna deny me a living either.”
“Alexander. I’ve known ye since ye were a bairn. Ye were a God-fearing lad, curious and of strong moral character. If yer sire ordered ye to do something, without hesitation ye’d do it. I remember the boy who sat quietly upon his bench, listening contentedly to the liturgy, asking for guidance if ye dinna understand something. What happened to that lad?”
He stared at the priest. “I grew up.”
“Will ye listen to reason, Alex? Remember the s
tory about the man who built his home on sand?”
“Aye. Ye couldna pick a better illustration, Father. My home is built on sand, and I intend to travel there within a sennight.” Through with the priest, Alex stood. “I’ve chosen Jamie as the next laird.”
Father Michael nodded in appreciation. “He’s capable.”
“Aye.”
“But his proclivity for women…”
“Will be over the moment he weds Keely Oliphant.”
“What?”
“A goodly match, I think. It will finally achieve what my sire long wished for, a true alliance between the MacKays and the Oliphants. United, we will have access to more soldiers and coin to defend ourselves against the Sutherlands.”
“Ye’d speak of such things when yer only brother has been freshly entombed within these sacred walls.”
“Life goes on, Father, does it not? John died for the very reason I wish to hurry my cousin’s nuptials with the lass. I will make sure the clan is secure and well-funded before I sail for Constantinople. And in the future, rest assured I will continue to send coin to maintain this place. I willna leave my kinsmen hungry and vulnerable.”
“Though I believe ye, time and distance have a way of making a man forget his responsibilities.” The priest arched a brow.
Alex chose to say nothing as he left the kirk. Now he could add the priest to his list of disobedient servants. When his sire had been laird, fear kept his subordinates in line. The problem here now was none of these people really knew Alex or what he was capable of, even though he’d killed a man yesterday in defense of Keely.
*
He wandered inside the great hall, ignoring the invitations to have a drink in appreciation of his brother. Food and ale were plentiful today, for the MacKays dinna just mourn a lost laird, they celebrated their accomplishments with a feast and music, even dancing once everyone was drunk enough.
Alex wanted nothing to do with it. Just as he’d told the priest, his clan needed to see that life would go on without Laird John, and now, without him. He sought refuge in the solar, happy to keep company with Petro. More intelligent than any man he’d ever met, the Italian had a peculiar way of calming Alex’s inner storms.
Unbreakable (Highlands Forever Book 1) Page 6