I climbed out and slammed the door.
I stared up at the house and shook my head.
Before I made it to the front door, it opened and Tinsley, Barr, and Kip were there.
Tinsley dove at me and threw her arms around me.
I hugged her tight and took a deep breath.
It was the true calm before the storm.
* * *
I stood back in the same kitchen in the same spot looking at the same folders with the same papers inside those folders that were causing all the fucking problems that rested on my shoulders.
As I sipped really expensive whiskey, the silence around me started to piss me off.
“Someone say something,” I growled.
“Ruby is alive and well,” Kip said.
I looked back at Kip. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Her and her grandmother are getting along at the moment.”
“Well that makes everything fucking worth it,” I said.
“What does that mean?” Tinsley asked. “Worth what?”
“Everything I lost,” I said.
“Pres, let’s get out of this house,” Barr said. “You and me. We’ll take a ride.”
“I don’t sway that easily, Barr,” I said. “I’m not some broken junkie chick.”
The words slipped out of my mouth too easily.
Fucking whiskey.
“Who are you talking about?” Tinsley asked.
Kip touched her arm. “Come here, girl. Come with me.”
“No,” Tinsley said. She shook Kip away. “Are you talking about me, Pres?”
“What do you think?” I asked. “Look at everything I’ve lost. And I never got to say goodbye to her. Because of you.”
“Christ, man,” Barr said.
I looked at Barr and stepped toward him.
He didn’t back down.
Our chests bumped together and Kip got between us.
“No way,” he said. “I love a good fight, but not like this.”
“Fuck yourself, Kip,” I said.
I threw my shoulder at him.
He stumbled back, laughing, resisting the urge to punch me.
Tinsley saved his ass as she grabbed my shirt and pulled at me. “Say it again to me, Pres. I dare you.”
I looked down at her. “Say what? That while my mother was taking her dying breath, I was chasing your junkie friend around your shithole of a town? Right? Trying to save another piece of scum from the trash they live in.”
“Fuck you,” Tinsley said. “You don’t mean that.”
“I fucking said it,” I snapped.
“Hey,” Barr yelled as he punched my shoulder. “Cut it.”
I stepped back and made a fist with my right hand.
Before I could dive forward Kip was right there, fists around my shirt, holding me, nose to nose.
“I’m taking her out of here,” Kip said. “You want to hurt everything around you? Go for it. But not her. We agreed to it. Remember? We take care of her. Always. Trash the fucking house. Burn it down. Just don’t hurt her.”
I curled my lip and looked at Tinsley. She had her hands over her mouth and nose, her eyes leaking tears.
Barr slid a hand around her shoulder. “Come here, love. He didn’t mean it.”
Tinsley walked away with Barr and Kip pushing away from me.
He pointed a finger at me.
I just stood, hands balled into fists. Wanting to fight. Needing to fight.
Tinsley’s cries echoed in the foyer as Barr opened the front door. Her knees started to give way. I jumped forward a few steps but stopped.
She looked back at me.
It wasn’t a lie.
Who the fuck was I chasing around… some junkie girl… for what? To keep Tinsley happy so she’d wrap her legs around me? I didn’t fucking do fucking favors for attention. If Barr or Kip wanted that… they could do it.
The heavy door shut and I was alone.
Completely alone.
Which probably wasn’t true.
Someone was in the house.
Someone, somewhere.
Fixing a light. Changing an air filter. Checking the chemical levels in the pool. Cleaning a floor. Doing laundry.
I put my head back and let out a scream that made my ears pop.
That wasn’t good enough.
I grabbed the bottle of whiskey off the counter.
I held it up and slammed it to the floor.
The thick glass shattered as the amber liquid spread like blood on the floor.
That wasn’t good enough…
I took the folders from the counter and went outside. With the flick of my wrist they were in the pool water, soaked and floating.
That. Wasn’t. Good. Enough.
Back inside the house I looked down the hallway to the guest room.
My mother’s room. The room where she died.
That was my next destination.
I stood outside the room, staring at the darkness.
I wasn’t going to go inside.
I threw a punch.
My knuckles exploded with pain when I hit the door.
I stepped back two steps and punched with my other hand.
Then for the next however long, I beat the fucking shit out of the door.
Until my knuckles were gushing blood.
Until my skin was ripped raw.
Until sweat poured down my face.
Until the pain in my hands made it almost impossible to make a fist.
Until I finally collapsed at the door and slid down to my knees.
I then curled up into a ball and fell to the floor.
I finally found my one and only weakness.
I hated losing those I found a way to love and care for.
Chapter 19
I slept for a few hours and wandered outside the house.
I called Preston (my lawyer) and left a voicemail, telling him what I did with the papers. And that my father was ready to wage a war for the house and other assets. I was ready for a fucking fight too. No matter what it cost. I wanted my father exposed as the piece of shit he was, and I wanted to make sure he would have nothing to do with my life or anything to do with the memory of my mother.
Then I sat near the edge of the property and watched the ocean.
The waves were forever soothing but they weren’t going to do shit at that moment.
My hands were swollen but I had regained feeling in them. I could make a fist, even if it did hurt more than a little.
I shot Barr a text.
Just tell me she’s okay
He replied with a thumbs up emoji and I set my phone next to me.
From there I sat until the morning decided to come.
Inside, people were there making coffee and breakfast.
I had a plate of food, a cup of coffee, and left the house.
The door to my SUV was wide open.
On the driver’s seat a note was waiting for me.
Scribbled handwriting.
Haven’t forgotten what we talked about. Hope you haven’t either. Don’t make this worse than it already is.
My hand curled around the note and I shook my head.
Today was the day Cole wanted to take a stand with me? To push at me even more? He had no fucking clue what he was up against then. Even if I was going to do it by myself. Barr and Kip could keep Tinsley safe. And whatever happened to me, it was just the way life went.
I climbed into the driver’s seat and grabbed my phone.
I thought about calling Cole and setting up a meeting.
He wanted Claire that bad? I could make that happen. Claire wasn’t a good person. She had a dark side that kept her in town. That’s why she couldn’t leave and be with the guy she really loved. That’s why she slept with my father. Both of them using their hidden guilt and pain as an excuse to get between the sheets.
But Tinsley…
I squeezed my eyes shut.
I had already crushed her hear
t last night.
The words I said…
And if she ended up losing Claire too…
My phone started to ring.
My lawyer returning my drunk fueled rambling call.
“Preston,” I said.
“Preston,” he said with a laugh.
“You got my message.”
“Not the first time I’ve gotten a message in the middle of the night like that.”
“You understand what I said?”
“I understand you were drunk,” he said.
“I was serious,” I said. “I want my father buried. I want whatever paperwork done that needs to be filed to keep him away from everything. He comes near this house again and he’s done. If he tries to file charges against me for hitting him, we pull the security footage from the house and show he entered illegally.”
“Wow,” Preston said. “You really thought this out.”
“No choice.”
“You sure you don’t want to think about it?”
“He’s dead to me,” I said. “And how much of a fight could he put up over what my mother left me?”
“He could fight all he wants,” Preston said. “He doesn’t have a leg to stand on Everything your mother gave to you was hers. There’s not a thing your father can do. Especially since she gave it to you. You’re the only child. He can be pissed and waste time and money on it.”
“That’s what I needed to hear,” I said. “There’s one more thing I need you to do, Preston.”
“Lay it on me, Preston,” he said with a laugh.
“The house.”
“The house. It’s yours. Of all the assets your mother left you, that’s the one that’s most rock solid. With the business side of things-”
“Tinsley Ditkiss,” I said.
“What’s that?”
“A name. Tinsley Ditkiss. Write it down. Put her down as the one who gets everything if I’m not around.”
“Not around… what are you talking about?”
“I’m just planning things out. Listen to me, on the business end, Barrington Richter and Kipton Unser get everything. As far as the sale goes, I want that to Tinsley Ditkiss. But I want it quiet. She cannot tell anyone about it. And she needs to leave this town.”
“You’re talking… wait a second here. I’m writing this all down. You mentioned the sale goes to Miss Ditkiss. What sale?”
I turned my head and took a deep breath. “That’s the one more thing I need from you.” I started to nod.
“What do you need?”
“I need you to sell the house… and give all the money to Tinsley.”
* * *
I stood at the top of the ditch and wasn’t sure the fate of the place.
Some fates you couldn’t control. Like the fate of my mother. There was no predicting that or controlling it. That just happened.
But the fates I could grab, I was going to hold tight and make work.
That’s why my brothers were going to be taken care of if something happened to me with the Cole situation. Same for Tinsley. She could get whatever the house was worth and get the hell away from BFH for good. Live the life she always wanted, deserved, and dreamed of.
“Having us up here to finish what we started last night?” Kip asked as he walked up behind me.
A second later I smelled the smoke from Barr’s cigarette.
Barr stepped up to my left. Kip to my right.
“Cole left me a note,” I said. “He wants to do this. He thinks I’m going to give up Claire.”
“What are you going to do?” Barr asked.
“If I give Claire up, it fixes a lot of problems around here,” I said. “After all, she was fucking my father while my mother was home dying. A little revenge without lifting a finger is an easy decision.”
“That would hurt Tinsley,” Kip said.
“I already did that,” I said.
“You didn’t mean that shit,” Kip said.
I looked at him. “What if I did? I mean, it’s the truth. Think about it. We were going after some fucking junkie girl. Who has no purpose. No meaning. Someone we never met before. We put ourselves in that apartment, fighting… drug dealers… for what?”
“Don’t say it was for nothing,” Kip said to me.
“Hey, look at me, Pres,” Barr said.
I turned my head. “What?”
“You’re all twisted up over a lot. Which is fine. You can’t lose it all now.”
“I’m not losing anything, Barr. I’m making the right decisions going forward.”
“Meaning?” Barr asked.
“I’ll take Cole head on. And I’ll make whatever decisions I need to. You two just make sure Tinsley is safe and sound. If the worst happens, I have everyone covered.”
“What the fuck are you saying, Pres?” Kip asked.
I stepped forward and Kip grabbed my shoulder.
I turned and swung at him.
When my fist hit his jaw, the pain from the night before exploded through my hand.
I screamed and grabbed my fist.
“Ah, shit,” Barr said.
By the time I lifted my gaze to Kip, he was in the air coming at me.
We collided and went down to the ground.
Throwing punches and rolling, we ended up down in the ditch.
We broke apart and stood up.
Kip didn’t give me time to ask if he wanted to fight.
He swung.
He was ready.
It wasn’t a good look or a good thing.
The Rulz imploding would fucking ruin everything for BFH. We were the reason why the war between East and West had taken a break. We were the reason why HCH kept themselves at bay for the most part. We were the reason why BC was quiet. With the exception of Cole and his outlaw crusade.
Kip landed two punches to my face.
With each punch I threw in return, the pain in my hands grew worse.
It was one of the only times in my life I almost felt weak. Like I couldn’t keep up. Or I couldn’t win a fight. And the entire time my heart pounded, begging for Tinsley to show up. To just see her face one more time. To just hold her pretty, little chin one more time and kiss her. Tell her I loved her and that what I said…
Kip’s right connected with my face again.
I let out a groan and stumbled back. My right foot twisted and my knee bent.
I was down on one knee in front of Kip.
I held up my fists and nodded.
Kip came at me and grabbed my shirt. He picked me up and I threw a cheap left hook to his ribs. Then he wrapped his arms around me and I threw my arms around him.
“I’m so sorry you lost her, man,” Kip said. “Your mother was cool as hell. I’m so fucking sorry she’s gone. But you can’t lose Tinsley now.”
“Fuck!” Barr’s voice yelled. “Fuck… you two…”
I pushed away from Kip and wiped my eyes.
Barr was charging full force down into the ditch.
He threw something into the air.
I realized it was a phone.
It was my phone.
It must have fallen out of my pocket when Kip and I were rolling down the hill.
I caught the phone and looked at the screen.
“We have to go,” Barr said. “There’s no fucking time.”
“What’s wrong?” Kip asked.
I tossed the phone to Kip and started to run.
“Oh, shit,” Kip said.
I only needed to read the text message once to memorize it.
Cole decided a note on the driver’s seat of my SUV wasn’t good enough.
Now your mother isn’t the only one you’ve lost.
* * *
My shoulder hit the front door to Kip’s guesthouse and I was suddenly running into the counter. The door had been left unlocked and I was moving way too fucking fast.
“Tinsley!” I yelled.
I looked around the house and then made my move for the bedroom.
It smell
ed like her.
The goddamn bedroom smelled like Tinsley’s skin. Her clothes. Her hair. Everything about her that I fell in love with. Like ten million little things that just built themselves up so fucking high that it was impossible for me to keep the wall over my heart from her.
The covers were messy.
And there was no sign of her.
I ran into the bathroom.
There was a towel on the floor.
I picked it up.
It was damp.
It smelled like her shampoo and soap.
In the bedroom again, Barr and Kip stood there, staring at me.
“Did she sleep here last night?” I asked.
“Yeah,” Kip said. “I crashed on the couch.”
“I crashed on the floor next to the bed,” Barr said.
“Fuck,” I said.
I ran out of the house with Barr and Kip behind me.
“Get in my ride,” I ordered them.
Before Barr could shut his door, I started to drive.
“Holy shit, Pres,” he said.
“Her SUV is gone,” I said. “She’s driving somewhere.”
Or being driven somewhere.
I couldn’t take that thought.
If Cole wanted to fuck with me, that was one thing. If he wanted to take his stand against the Rulz to show BC he was big and bad, that was fine too.
But Tinsley…
I gritted my teeth.
“Let’s just think for a second,” Kip said. “Or just call him. Tell Cole we’ll bring Claire. Then we can…”
“What?” Barr asked. “Tell Claire what’s going on?”
“Think she won’t believe us?”
“Oh, she will,” Barr said. “And if she’s who I think she is, she will make the choice for us. To save Tinsley.”
“Shut up,” I yelled. “Shut up and look. Tell me…”
I pulled the SUV to the side of the road and jumped out.
“Pres!” Barr screamed.
I started to run.
I heard both Barr and Kip yelling my name as I ran along the side of the road.
Tinsley’s SUV was up ahead, turned almost sideways, the passenger door open.
Kip caught up to me and then took the lead.
I pointed.
“I see it!” he yelled.
I yelled as I ran faster to catch up to Kip.
PRES: a bay falls high novel Page 17