Yeah, big time. All these years Davey had thought he needed to find a way to forgive her. As it turned out, he needed her to forgive him. She had tried like hell to reach out to him, even after she’d moved away and was facing terminal cancer. While he hadn’t known about the letters, Cruz had regularly told him that his mother loved him. He’d even tried to take Davey to see her.
But being the dumbass that he’d been, Davey had always refused.
Now, he felt lower than pond scum.
He nodded. “I’ll take care of it. I’m gonna go to the barn to clear my head, then I’ll finish up in here.”
“I’ll finish up,” Cruz offered. “The last two boxes look like junk, but I assume you want to save the letters.”
“Damn right.” Davey rose. “Thanks, Cruz. For everything.”
He ambled toward the barn, expecting to walk through it and into the fields in search of the cows. But Concordia was still inside the barn even though Cruz had opened it up earlier. If Davey hadn’t known better, he would have sworn she’d been waiting for him.
“I screwed up again,” he said, making his way toward her.
Concordia approached him eagerly, probably because every time he came to the barn he brought a treat. He pulled the granola bar out of his pocket, hoping it was okay for the cow to eat. He suspected it was since Nora had made them from scratch and had put a bunch of healthy stuff in them.
“This is all I could find, girl. Cruz and I need to get our asses to the grocery store.” He extended the granola bar in his palm and the cow wolfed it down. “Guess you liked it.” He laughed. “That’ll make Nora happy.”
Concordia nuzzled her head against his shoulder. “You want rubs?” he asked, shaking his head at himself. He was cooing to a cow again.
Somehow being around Concordia soothed him. While he couldn’t communicate with her the same way Nora did, he often got ideas when he was hanging out with her. Like going back to the Potter’s farm to find out where her calf had been taken and figuring out how to identify which calf was hers at the farm on the Kentucky border.
“I don’t know what kind of special powers you have,” he said, rubbing Concordia’s soft head. “But could you ask the fuck-up fairy to skip me next go around? I think I’ve had my share over the last decade.”
Lifting her head, Concordia snorted, as if she were laughing at him. “Yeah, yeah.” He rubbed her neck. “How can I expect Mom to forgive me?” He let out a long, slow exhale, still pissed at himself for not listening to Cruz, for not giving his mom a chance. “I didn’t know about the letters, but even so, I was an ass. Now I have eleven years to make up for.”
Concordia snorted again, but this time the sound was soft and encouraging. Gazing into the cow’s soulful eyes, he suddenly felt everything would be okay.
An hour later, Davey headed over to his mom’s after Cruz told him she had finished at the restaurant for the day. Cruz had also given his mother a heads up that Davey would be over and he’d told her about the letters.
As Davey pulled in front of his mother’s house, shame engulfed him. He berated himself for being a self-absorbed child, for not giving her the benefit of doubt after the close relationship they had shared, and most of all for never moving past his anger to reconcile with her. He made his way to her front porch slowly, with his head hung low. At least Cruz had paved the way for him, attempting to make his difficult conversation a little easier. He appreciated Cruz beyond what words could convey.
His mom opened the door before he knocked and pulled him into a hug. Since Cruz had told her about the letters, he didn’t see the need for any preamble. “I’m so sorry, Mom,” he said, talking quietly against her shoulder.
“Oh, honey, you don’t need to apologize.” She squeezed him in tight, and for a few long moments, he soaked in the comfort of her embrace.
After she drew back, she gestured for him to come inside. As she waved her hand, he caught a flash of light from the huge rock on her right hand and smiled. He’d come full circle. Now, he was genuinely happy for both her and Cruz.
“Come on in, stay for a while.”
He followed her inside and they settled on the couch in the living room. On the coffee table was a tray of snickerdoodles, his favorite cookies, along with several Cokes, his preferred drink, and glasses filled with ice. “Please help yourself,” his mom said, lifting her lips into a smile he didn’t deserve.
He poured Coke over ice and took a sip. “Again, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know about the letters, but I shouldn’t have blown you off and I shouldn’t have assumed you didn’t try to contact me.” He put down his glass, shifted, and met her gaze. “I have no idea why Dad didn’t give me your letters, but I’m glad he kept them.” He thought about what he’d read, her kind words, her unwavering persistence, as guilt chewed at his insides all over again. “I’ve read every single one.” He closed his eyes. Why hadn’t he given her benefit of the doubt or at least the courtesy of a conversation, he wondered for the millionth time?
Irritation at the dumbass kid he’d been churned in his gut along with the reeling guilt, causing a queasy swell. He forced the sick feeling down and blinked his eyes open.
“I’m glad Tuck kept the letters,” his mother said. “And I’m glad you finally got to read them.” She smiled at him. Smiled. “Better late than never, right?”
While he appreciated her lightheartedness, he didn’t get it. How could she not be angry over his self-entitled, snotty, judgmental behavior?
“Have a cookie, sweetie.” She lifted the plate of snickerdoodles which appeared to be freshly baked, making him feel guilty all over again. He didn’t deserve cookies.
He took one anyway. Munching on it, he wondered if she was just acting gracious to help him save face and underneath the niceties, she was angry. But one glance into her kind eyes told him she was sincere. He didn’t understand why she wasn’t at least a little mad. He’d been a selfish asshole. He’d caused her years of unjustified grief. He was sure as hell mad at himself. Sadness, regret, and guilt whirled through him like a cyclone. As the negative emotions intermingled and gained hurricane-like force, they nearly consumed him. He clasped his hands together tightly, attempting to gain control of his destructive thoughts. “Aren’t you at least a little mad?”
“No.” She shook her head and met his gaze. “We can’t go back in time,” she said, her voice positive and strong. “I’m grateful that you’re in my life now.” She reached over and put a hand on top of his. “It’s now that matters. Now is all that we have.” She squeezed his hand as her lips curved upward. “So let’s focus on the now.”
While he didn’t fully understand her easy forgiveness, he appreciated it. He scooted over and wrapped his arms around her. “Thanks, Mom.” He would work hard to focus on the now and to make sure that in the future they talked through any issues to avoid a reoccurrence.
Hugging his mother tight, an awareness emerged. Over the last decade, he’d been frustrated, hurt, and angry. He’d never wanted a serious relationship with a woman because he hadn’t wanted to get hurt again. But what had occurred with his mother had been a colossal misunderstanding, fueled by his own arrogant, self-centered behavior. Now, he could transcend those erroneous notions. He could build a real family with Nora, Ben, and the other children they could have. He just needed to convince Nora that she wanted the same.
When they drew apart, his mother took his hand again. “There’s something I want you to understand,” she said. “Your father and I weren’t meant for each other, but we brought you into this world so I’ve never once wished our relationship hadn’t happened.”
Humbled, he lowered his head. Over the last decade, he had caused his mother nothing but grief. Yet, she had let it all go, choosing instead to build a positive relationship with him now. He’d finally caught up with Nora and Cruz, recognizing the amazing woman that was his mother.
She patted his leg and waited until he lifted his gaze. “That doesn’t mean love doesn’t exi
st,” she said. “It took me a long time to figure that out and I don’t want you to make the same mistake.”
Davey nodded. Until recently, he had doubted that romantic love existed. Now, he only had to look around him. Whenever he spent time with his mother and Cruz, he was assured that love was very real. The deep feelings he had for Nora were further proof.
“You should think about that when it comes to Nora,” she said, as if she had followed his train of thought. Her smile brightened and her eyes turned hopeful.
Returning her smile, he let out a low laugh. “You’re preaching to the choir,” he said, “but I might need a little help.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Nora leaned against the high-top table in the ornate ballroom feeling like Cinderella. She’d never been in such a posh environment. She took in the fancy walls with crown molding, fluted columns with gold leaf accents, and thick velvet drapes hanging over French windows. The ceilings were a sea of gold with massive tiered chandeliers shimmering in the soft light. High heels clacked against marble floors as wait staff dressed in black and white gracefully carried trays of champagne and hors d’oeuvres.
Yesterday, Steph had taken her shopping to purchase an outfit for this NASCAR sponsored event. Wearing a black three-quarter length dress and strappy sliver heels with glittery crystals made her feel like she fit in even though she was more comfortable in jeans and a T-shirt. But she could admit that she cleaned up well.
Besides, this event was for a good cause, a charity that funded global orphanages.
When it came to kids and animals, she was all in. She appreciated that Davey cared enough to attend this event to help raise money for the orphanages.
This morning he had sent a car service to drive her to Bristol so she could ride home with him on Monday morning. Steph and Cruz were skipping this weekend’s race; they’d headed to Vegas instead to get married. When Steph had first shared the news, Nora had been disappointed. She’d wanted Steph to have a big wedding that she could be a part of until she realized that was her dream, not Steph’s. Last weekend Steph had told Cruz that she didn’t care about the ceremony, she only cared about becoming his wife. Nora smiled into her champagne thinking about how quickly Cruz had made the Vegas arrangements after Steph’s declaration. They’d get the opportunity to celebrate with the bride and groom on Wednesday night at the party Davey was hosting for them.
AJ smiled at her as he grabbed two glasses of champagne from a passing waiter. She was hanging out with him while Davey did some PR work for the event.
“Where’s Ben-jo?” AJ asked, sliding one of the glasses across the table.
“He and Lucas have a science project due on Monday.” She took a sip of the champagne. Rich and smooth, she tasted hints of ripe fruit and white flowers. “Jamie’s a science geek so he’s helping them.”
Ben had been disappointed to miss the race, but he’d been happy when talk had turned to lava eruptions and earthquakes for his and Lucas’ elaborate project.
AJ grinned. “I was a science nerd too.”
Laughing, she shook her head. “I can’t see it.” She took another sip of the delectable champagne. “Where’s your date for the evening?”
He shrugged. “I decided to come solo.”
“Really?” She touched a palm to his forehead. “Are you sick?”
“Nah.” Chuckling, he brushed her hand away from his head. “I’m just getting tired of the song and dance.”
She hadn’t expected that response. Swirling the amber liquid, golden bubbles rose to the surface in her glass. She lifted it in the air. “Here’s to the right woman for you.” AJ laughed as she tapped her glass to his. “She’s out there.”
“Is this your new girl?” a drop-dead gorgeous blonde asked AJ, as she approached their table.
AJ put his arm around her shoulder. “I wish,” he said, sounding like he really meant it.
Aw, AJ was sweet. Nora considered planting a big, noisy kiss on his cheek but she refrained. Still, his words made her feel confident around this imposingly beautiful woman.
“This is Nora Williams, Davey’s girlfriend.” AJ waved a hand toward the other woman. “Nora meet Becca.”
As Nora shook the woman’s tiny, beautifully manicured hand, Nora recognized her. She’d been the lead actress in the romantic comedy Nora had recently seen with Ella and Hud.
“Oh.” Becca’s perfect top lip protruded ever so slightly. “I didn’t know he was dating again,” she said, her voice wistful and filled with disappointment.
“Yep.” AJ grinned. “And he got quite the catch this time.”
Based on the woman’s indignant expression and tight posture, Nora could only assume that Davey had dated Becca in the past and that AJ had just snubbed her.
Becca gave Nora a half-smile. “Nice to meet you,” she said politely, and to AJ she said, “See you around handsome.”
After she left, Nora stared at the flickering candle on the table, then lifted her gaze to AJ. “When did Becca and Davey date?”
“Davey did a cameo in a movie she starred in a couple of years back, then they started dating.” AJ took Nora’s hand. “Don’t pay her any mind. She’s hung up on herself, thinks she’s better than everyone else. We were all glad when Davey dumped her snooty ass.”
“Who’s a snooty ass?” Davey asked, joining them.
“Nora just had the pleasure of meeting Becca,” AJ said, his voice heavy with sarcasm.
“Glad those days are behind me,” Davey said.
Nora let out a soft gasp of surprise. Becca was one of the most beautiful women she had ever seen, yet both Davey and AJ acted as if she were the real prize. She kissed Davey on the cheek as he put an arm around her waist.
“Did you miss me, baby?” he asked.
Taking in the hopeful glint in his heartbreakingly blue eyes, she pulled his face to hers and kissed him.
She pulled back when AJ moaned loudly. “You guys are killing me.” He winked at her, then pinned a look on Davey. “Aren’t friends supposed to share?”
“Find your own.” Davey squeezed her in closer. “This one’s mine.” His possessiveness should have put her off, but it didn’t. It made her feel content as a cat curling up in a patch of sunshine. With a bright warmth in her chest, she gave him a flirty smile, then excused herself to use the restroom.
Right after she’d made her way into a stall, she heard the click of heels entering the ladies room.
“He seems happy,” a familiar voice said. “Real happy.”
It was Becca. Who was she talking about, Nora wondered, another movie star?
“I’ve tried my best to get Davey back over the last few months, but he wants nothing to do with me.”
Nora stifled her pant of surprise. Becca had been going after Davey, and he had picked her instead?
“You need to move on,” another female voice said, “Did you see the way Davey looked at her earlier?”
Becca sighed. “Yeah. He seems pretty into her.”
Nora’s heart beat quickened. Davey had blown off this stunningly beautiful woman for her. She finally believed—really believed—that he had meant every kind, complimentary thing he’d said to her. It put to rest her lingering fears that he was using standard pick-up lines or simply trying to get what he wanted. That wasn’t the case at all. He had been fully and completely genuine.
The revelation both pleased and scared her. Neither she or Davey had had much experience—or much luck—with relationships.
“There’s plenty of men in the sea,” the other woman said.
“True. I think I’ll cast my net on AJ next,” Becca said. “He’s cute and talented.” A click sounded—maybe a purse or make-up bag closing? “He can be a little surly, but I’m sure I can tame him,” she said, her voice cool and confident.
Poor AJ, Nora thought, suppressing her giggle. She waited until Becca and her friend left before exiting the stall.
Becca, a gorgeous movie star, had just acquiesced to her. Sh
e left the restroom, tall and proud, sporting an increased level of self-assurance.
Davey sipped his non-alcoholic beer waiting for Nora to return from the restroom. His PR work and sponsor interviews had taken way too long. The whole time he’d been gone, he had counted down the minutes until he could get back to Nora.
He wanted to show her a good time tonight, to show her that she did fit into his world. Even more importantly, he wanted to show her how much she meant to him. His gaze moved to the direction in which she’d disappeared. Where was she, he wondered impatiently?
From across the table, AJ chuckled. “You’ve got it bad, man.”
Davey grinned. Yeah, he did…and he liked it. He lifted his bottle in AJ’s direction, making his friend laugh again.
“I don’t blame you,” AJ said. “She sure is something.”
Across the ballroom, a band strummed soft music and guests swirled around on the large dance floor.
When Nora sashayed toward them, his breath hitched. She had a wholesome beauty that never failed to grab him by the balls. Her golden-brown hair glistened under the soft lights, like a single raindrop on a strand of hay. She had fixed her hair in an elaborate up-do, but a few strands had fallen out here and there, and he desperately wanted to pull it down and muss it up, running his hands through her silky tresses.
Her stunning emerald eyes sparkled as she approached him. “Hey, there,” she said. “Did you miss me?” she asked, repeating his question from earlier.
He tugged her to him. “More than you can imagine.” He tipped her chin up and kissed her, putting everything he had that was soft, sweet, and romantic into it.
When he drew back, she swayed. Gratified, he held her elbows to steady her. “May I have this dance?”
She blinked up at him through her long lashes. “I’d like that.”
He grinned at AJ, then led Nora across the room, past tall tables and mingling guests, and large ornate doors manned by white-gloved staff. A floral scent filled the air as they made their way past the enormous arrangements, but nothing smelled better than the woman at his side. Her scent was quintessentially Nora, a mix of pine forest, water mists, and sweet honeysuckle. Drawing it in now, his heart beat a little faster, his pulse raced, and his southern parts rose to attention.
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