by Jacob Rayne
Josh pressed the ten with his thumb. A countdown appeared in the bottom left hand corner of the screen.
‘To override you just double-tap the stopwatch box,’ Laverick explained.
Marsha watched as Josh did as the doctor said. The clock disappeared and the slide control reappeared.
‘Now, slide it to thirty to give us time to speak about the other features,’ Laverick said.
Josh did so, and a countdown from thirty appeared in the bottom left corner of the screen.
‘There are two more basic functions we need to cover, then I’ll leave you to get the hang of it. You’re learning quickly, but I don’t want to bamboozle you with all this new information. Now, the third icon from the left is a vital one. Mr Walker, please click the bottle sign.’
Josh flicked the button. Another slide came up on the touch screen.
‘This one, as I’m sure you’ve guessed from the rather self-explanatory symbol, is the feeding routines. You can leave it all to chance and click the question mark – that’s a feature I was keen to leave in, for those parents who want to maintain as natural a parenthood as possible – or you can set routines using the slide control. This time, the feedings are between thirty minutes and eight hours. If you think little Caleb is still hungry, you can double-tap the bottle icon to override the routines.’
‘So does it completely regulate the functions and cravings?’ Josh asked.
‘Yes, if you set routines and save them it will run Caleb like clockwork. He will wake at the same time, shit and piss at convenient intervals and feel hungry when you want him to. It completely suppresses any natural functions.’
‘Isn’t that playing God?’ Josh asked, surprising himself with the vehemence in his voice.
‘If you don’t mind my saying so, Mr Walker, this whole procedure smacks of playing God to me. It’s a little late to get on a high horse about this technology.’
Josh opened his mouth to rebuke the doctor, but he saw that he had a good point.
‘May I continue?’ Laverick asked, a faint smile on his lips. ‘As with all of the procedures, you can get an immediate effect by double-tapping the relevant icon.’
Marsha nodded. Josh was still pissed at Laverick’s putdown and didn’t react.
‘The fourth icon along is the wind control. Again, it’s operated on a slide mechanism. The top will make Caleb vomit. Sometimes this is necessary to cleanse the stomach, or very useful if he has swallowed something he shouldn’t have. The bottom is a little burp. As with the others, you can set intervals to bring wind up, or you can leave Mother Nature to take care of the problem. Click on the open mouth icon for me, please, Mr Walker.’
Josh thumbed the button. The slide control came up. Josh slid it three quarters of the way to the bottom then clicked on the tick.
Caleb instantly let out a little burp then settled back into the basket.
‘Very well done, Mr Walker,’ Laverick congratulated him. ‘So, that’s the crash course in the use of the control for the basics. In general terms, all functions operate on a similar principal. Click the icon, use the slide to set the extremity of the response, tap the tick to confirm. Once you’ve done that, the routine will be established until you change it through the icon menu or override by double-tapping the relevant icon. Remember that double-tapping brings about an instantaneous response.’ He paused to let this information sink in.
‘It’s all in the quick start guide,’ he said upon seeing the furrowed brows. ‘Now, before we wake little Caleb up, there’s the subject of what to feed him. First, I will say that you’ll get marvellous results by feeding Caleb with ordinary baby milk, and baby food when he is weaning. But, to really maximise the effects of this technology, I would recommend you feed him with this.’
Laverick pulled a five kg drum out of his briefcase. Digifeed, the label read. ‘This is a special blend of vitamins, minerals and chemical compounds I personally designed with the digital child in mind. It caters specifically to their unique needs. It ain’t cheap, I’m afraid, at fifty pounds a tub, but I can do you a special introductory offer. Ten tubs for two hundred pounds. That’s better than half price.’
Josh frowned at the inappropriate sales pitch.
‘I understand your distress, Mr Walker, but honestly this is the best food for your unique child. I’ll give you this tub for nothing and if you decide you don’t want to continue I will understand, but I’m sure you want the best for your child.’
Marsha looked at him. Josh opened his mouth to respond but cast his eyes to the floor.
‘We’ll think about it,’ Marsha said.
Laverick nodded. ‘Ok, that’s about it, then. If you want to wake Caleb up before I go, so you can try the device before I throw you in at the deep end.’
6
Josh picked up the device and double-clicked the Z icon. Caleb’s eyes opened instantly and he let out a cry.
‘Hey, sweetie,’ Marsha said.
‘That’s it, although I wouldn’t use the extreme response every time,’ Laverick said, before stopping himself and adding, ‘Forgive me, you should raise your child however you like.’
Marsha moved in and picked her son up. He felt so light in her arms, but the warmth he gave off made her sigh with relief. Already she loved this little bundle of joy with all of her heart.
‘Let’s make things interesting,’ Laverick said, reaching past Josh and double-tapping the nappy icon.
Caleb’s face contorted and reddened. Marsha thought he looked like a miniature version of a contestant in the world’s strongest man competition on TV. A sickly smell filled the air around her son.
‘Time to get your hands dirty, Mr Walker,’ Laverick grinned, the elation in his voice impossible to miss.
Caleb strained again. The smell worsened.
‘Sweet Jesus,’ Josh said, cupping his hand to his nose to shield it from the smell. He took Caleb out of Marsha’s arms and laid him on his back on the floor. The tiny child again squirmed and strained and reddened as Josh fought to undo the buttons on his vest.
‘I don’t think he’s finished yet, honey,’ Marsha said, noting the colour of her son’s face.
Laverick’s shoulders shook with the effort of holding in his laughter. Josh glared at him furiously. His fingers struggled with the Velcro ties of the nappy. Dark liquid had started to seep from the back of the nappy and ran down Caleb’s buttocks.
Josh tried not to inhale but the smell stung his nostrils regardless. Caleb’s face contorted again and an audible wet fart crept out, sending a deluge of brown liquid cascading down the backs of his legs.
Laverick burst out laughing now, tears rolling down his face as he watched Josh panic and curse.
Josh managed to get a towel under Caleb’s back to stop the shit dripping onto the carpet. He grabbed a fistful of the wet wipes Laverick had provided and started clumsily trying to wipe up the stinking filth that ran down the backs of his son’s legs. His expression was one of utter disgust.
Marsha tried to help Josh, but he wanted to sort this out himself. He waved her away then wiped fast and hard. Caleb squirmed and cried beneath him.
‘Hold still, little man,’ Josh said, trying to keep the fury out of his voice.
A few minutes later Caleb was cleaned up and Josh was struggling to fasten the nappy. In the end, it looked like a blind man had put it on. Caleb cooed contentedly, gawping up at the ceiling.
‘Not a bad job, Mr Walker,’ Laverick chortled as Josh came in having washed his hands. ‘I did this to demonstrate that the override option always gives the most extreme reaction. You can use it, but it’s best used in moderation.’
Josh nodded, realising that this had been done to teach him a lesson.
‘Oh, there’s one thing I forgot,’ Laverick said as Caleb let out an ear-splitting cry. ‘Possibly the most useful feature. Marsha, please double-tap the tear icon.’
Marsha did so. Caleb’s cry cut off as abruptly as if he’d been strangled.
&nb
sp; ‘That is the override for crying. As with the other functions, you can set a routine, leave it in God’s hands, or a mixture of the two. Say you fancy a good night’s sleep, you can put Caleb on a nine hour sleep, knock the crying back to ten hours and have a lie in. Very useful. Might help you stay friends with the neighbours too.’
Josh faked a smile. He was still pissed at the doctor’s sly trick with the nappy.
‘Any questions?’ Laverick said.
‘I think we’re good,’ Josh said.
‘Yeah, I’ve got the basic hang of it,’ Marsha said.
‘Just remember the override gives the instantaneous, extreme response,’ Laverick said, finding it hard to keep the smile off his face. ‘I’ll be back at eleven tomorrow morning. I hope you have a good night’s sleep.’ He shook each of their hands, then picked up his briefcase, the small wooden box and went out to his car.
The sound of his engine gradually faded, leaving Josh and Marsha alone in the house with the little boy they thought they would never see again.
7
Josh and Marsha almost had a blazing row over who was going to be the first to hold Caleb. Marsha won in the end, with the argument that she’d bore him and gone through the agony of childbirth.
They stared at their tiny son, awed and humbled by the greatest gift anyone had ever given them.
‘What shall we do about the routines, do you think?’ Josh asked.
‘I don’t know. I kind of want to do things as naturally as possible, but I’m fucking exhausted.’
‘Me too. Shall we put him on a routine for tonight, then let nature take its course from then on?’
‘Yeah, it’s a deal. This is an amazing idea, isn’t it?’
‘It is, but it feels a little too much like playing God. There’s got to be some drawback, hasn’t there?’
‘As the doctor said, we’ve already crossed that bridge. We may as well enjoy the advantages that Caleb offers us.’
Josh shrugged. ‘I guess.’
‘Mammy loves you, munchkin,’ Marsha said, planting a huge kiss on Caleb’s forehead. He blinked at her, his eyes slightly crossed. ‘I think he’s smiling,’ she grinned.
Caleb writhed a little then let out a fart that stung both of their nostrils.
Josh started laughing. ‘At least it’s your turn to do the nappy.’
Marsha burst out laughing. ‘That was so funny.’
‘The fucker stitched me up like a kipper,’ Josh smiled.
‘Come on, let’s get this little one to bed.’
Josh and Marsha both held Caleb for a few minutes before gently laying him down. They carefully pulled the sleeping bag around him, then stroked his head and kissed him.
‘Let’s do it gradually,’ Josh said, thumbing the Z icon. He slid the slide control down to a quarter of the way from the bottom. Caleb stirred, lifting his hands above his head. His breathing slowed, his eyelids gradually closed. Ten minutes later he was snoring softly. Josh thumbed the Z icon again, then moved the slide to the number nine.
‘That should give us a good sleep,’ Marsha nodded.
Josh clicked the tick to confirm. The LED blinked nine times and beeped for nine seconds.
They crept out of the room, eager not to disturb their sleeping miracle.
Caleb woke up exactly nine hours later, amazing his parents with the efficiency of Dr Laverick’s device. Their sleeping son came round gradually, as they had programmed on the device.
Josh picked him up. Marsha adjusted the feed control so that they had half an hour before Caleb was hungry. They made up a bottle using the feed tub that Laverick had left for them.
Right on schedule, Caleb started to cry for his bottle. Josh fed him, his free hand using the device to control the wind his son let out.
‘This is such an awesome invention,’ Marsha said, watching the ease with which their son was being fed.
Josh nodded. He still had his doubts about suppressing nature, but he couldn’t deny how impressed he was with Laverick’s invention.
Caleb swallowed the last of his bottle.
‘Think he’s still hungry?’ Marsha asked.
‘He may be, but we can delay his feed if we choose to.’
Marsha nodded. ‘Let’s give it an hour, see how he is.’
Caleb sat stock still on Josh’s lap then settled in to his father’s arm.
A knock on the door startled them. Caleb started to cry until Josh double-tapped the tear icon. He winked at his wife then set Caleb down in the Moses basket while he got the door. Laverick greeted him with a smile.
‘Ah, we weren’t expecting you until eleven,’ Josh said.
‘I know. Sorry, I have things to do this afternoon, I needed to bring our appointment forward. I hope you don’t mind.’
Josh shrugged. He was starting to resent the smug doctor. There was still something undeniably creepy about him.
Laverick led in a toddler. ‘This is my son, Martin,’ he said.
‘Hello, Martin,’ Marsha smiled.
Martin waved but hid behind his father’s leg.
‘Still a little shy,’ Laverick muttered, more to himself than anyone else. He pulled out a device which was similar to the one that controlled Caleb and made a few quick adjustments on the touch screen.
‘Hi,’ Martin said, suddenly beaming. He ran out from behind Laverick’s leg and hugged Marsha.
‘That’s better,’ Laverick said.
‘You mean you…’ Josh said.
‘Yes. Martin was the first successful digital child I created. My circumstances were very similar to yours, I’m afraid. Unfortunately my good lady is no longer around to see the fruits of my intense labour.’
‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ Marsha said.
‘Don’t be. She made her choices,’ Laverick said, his brow furrowing, his demeanour darkening.
Josh frowned. He didn’t like the way the doctor had reacted to Marsha’s comment.
‘But, let’s not dwell on the past,’ Laverick said. ‘Martin here was the first of many. I wanted to show you the full capabilities of the digital child. Caleb is a little young to show off the full extent of this marvellous technology.’
‘This should be good,’ Marsha said, cuddling into Josh’s side.
‘You remember I told you that if the child was being bullied you could teach it a martial art in a few seconds?’ Laverick said.
‘Yes,’ Josh said.
‘Watch this,’ Laverick said. He gently started to shove Martin around. ‘At the moment, the aggression control is at its lowest level. Martin wouldn’t hurt a fly right now. But,’ he frantically started flicking things on the touch screen, ‘Now he is a black belt in karate.’
Martin’s posture changed as soon as Laverick’s device had beeped. His hands came up in a fighting stance, his weight dropped as he bent his knees. With startling speed, he stepped forwards and delivered a vicious kick to Laverick’s knee.
The doctor fell. Martin waited above him, bouncing on his feet, his hands up still.
‘Now,’ Laverick said, wincing slightly at the pain of his crash landing. ‘He is still fairly passive, but watch what happens if I override the aggression control.’ He double-tapped the screen.
Martin raced in and dived onto Laverick’s chest, throwing lightning fast punches at his father’s head.
Josh and Marsha gasped at the display. Laverick hastily adjusted the device with his thumb. Martin stood back, a look of shock on his face.
‘Sorry, Daddy,’ he said, then ran to his father and hugged him.
‘That is how you put an end to bullying in the digital age,’ Laverick smiled.
Josh and Marsha nodded. It was an impressive display, but it terrified them at the same time.
‘Just a thought, doc,’ Josh said. ‘What if something goes wrong with this?’
Laverick waved away the idea. ‘This has been tested thousands of times. The technology is infallible. The device controls the behaviour perfectly. There is nothing that co
uld go wrong.’
Josh wasn’t happy at the idea.
‘Languages,’ Laverick said, hastily changing the subject. ‘You can download languages to the digital child and they can be fluent in seconds. Very handy for when you go on holiday.’ He tapped a few times on the screen and Martin started talking fluent French. ‘The possibilities are endless,’ Laverick smiled. He back-handed a drop of blood from his burst lip.
‘This is really something,’ Marsha said.
‘Yes,’ Josh said.
‘I know. Caleb will have these facilities, just like I say, when he’s older you will get more out of him. A world of possibilities is at your fingertips. Your child can literally be anything you want him to be at the tap of a screen.’
Josh and Marsha were hugely impressed by the potential.
‘For now, though, we’ll concentrate on Caleb. Martin, please play in the corner,’ Laverick said.
Martin turned and went to the corner where he started playing with a green alien toy that Laverick handed him. He flicked the screen. ‘Half an hour should do,’ he mused, then tapped the screen.
‘That was a little scary,’ Josh said to Marsha.
Laverick pretended he hadn’t heard. ‘Now, if you want to raise Caleb naturally you need only to lock away the device in a safe place. Nature will take its course. Or you can be glued to the device for every minor aspect of Caleb’s life. Most people choose some middle ground between the two.’
Josh nodded.
‘Yes, this is an amazing piece of technology,’ Laverick said. ‘The major functions are on the screen. It also contains a full medical history for doctors. It knows how old Caleb is, so it will offer new functions as and when they arise. For example, the weaning settings will automatically appear around the six month mark. It’s very intelligent.’
‘This is brilliant,’ Marsha gushed. ‘Just having Caleb back in our lives is reward enough, but we have this amazing technology at our fingertips too.’
Laverick smiled at the compliment. ‘Yes, the menus will grow the older Caleb gets. The aggression controls come in at around eighteen months. I wish you every success with your child. If you have any problems, call me any time. If there’s an emergency ring the number on the top of the quick guide. I recommend you keep one of the devices in a safe place and use the other. I have a master copy but it is much easier and safer if you keep one of them to one side.’