by Pamela Ann
“Oh, I was wondering if I could stay in your house. Trista’s having everyone over at Taylor’s, but I want to stay in your place. Is that okay?” Being in his house, surrounded with his things—his smell—made me feel closer to him somehow.
“Why are you asking for permission? It’s your home, too.”
He was so nice to me. “Technically, it’s yours. I just didn’t want to be all cocky and barge in there as if I own the place simply because we’re dating. That would be rude.”
When Bass responded, his tone shifted. “Do you want me to put your name on the title so you’ll feel more comfortable barging into our home, as you put it?” he said it with all seriousness.
That was not what I was getting at. Goodness, not everything was about monetary value. “No, of course not.”
Bass persisted, “I could if you wanted me to.”
I think I was blushing from head to foot. Why did he have to be so generous? I knew he spoiled his women from what I had read in the tabloids, but I didn’t want to be one of those women. Nope. Not happening.
“Please, don’t. I’m perfectly happy with what I have. People already assume I’m using you, I don’t need gold digger attached to my name, too.”
There was a big, fat, elephant pause.
“It’ll be all be yours one day,” he spoke, breaking the silence.
He needed to chill on that subject, seriously. What the shit. “Even then, if we do end up together, I don’t want your money. I’ll work for my own.” There you go. Get the damn message, BC.
“So you think about us like that?” he asked, smiling. Yeah, I could hear him smile. It was ridiculous.
Cautiously, I tiptoed around the subject. “The future, you mean?”
“Yes, Emma, about the future.”
Should I lie? Honestly, the future was dominating my mind as of late. Since Nikki bombarded herself back into the picture, it was all I thought about before I went to sleep. “I do. Not so much before, but now, yeah. Constantly.”
He took a second before asking, “What do you see in it?”
Getting slicker, weren’t we? The subject was critical and I didn’t want to say the wrong thing. So what was the best strategic way to go about it without sounding so defensive or desperate? One must answer a question with a question. “What do you see in yours?” I quipped back.
“You.” He paused. “I see you, Emma. Very clearly, in fact.”
The way he said those words sent tingles all over my body. Even in his words, I felt his love. He overflowed with it. “Say my name…” It was driving me insane, however I needed to hear him say it again.
“Emma,” he rasped out.
Life was good. I sighed, smiling.
“You haven’t answered me.” Bass waited.
That bedroom voice of his threatened to make me bust out my spanking, brand-new dildo, all thanks to Amber’s wild, spontaneous trip to Hustler on Sunset strip. “I know, I haven’t.” I pouted, needing to make his imagination roll, hot and loaded. “But I want to keep you guessing.”
He made a half laugh, half groaning sound. “You can’t leave me in the dark, woman.”
Not putting up, buddy. “Oh, poor you. You just have to wait, hey?” After our lengthy conversation, I had to hang up because I was due in the hospital to do my volunteer work for the rest of the afternoon.
The thought of hanging out with all of my little friends made me smile. They made my heart swell. When my life held no meaning for me after Bass left me last year, these angels helped me get through, healing me slowly as I got inspired with their relentless optimism and strength. These babies of mine kept me grounded, and no matter what happened, I would always donate my free time and money to help whenever I could.
“You’re late!” Trista announced the second I came through the double doors.
“Easy, love,” Flo, the nurse, winked at me as she tapped Trista’s shoulder. “Angela’s been waiting for you.”
With an apologetic smile, I breezed through them. “Sorry, won’t happen again,” I muttered as I headed towards Angela’s room.
The little girl had the same birthday as I did, not to mention the name was my character’s name in the movie. I felt really drawn to her. She’d been fighting a stage II Lymphoma, and so far, her treatments had been working.
I knew, deep down, some of these kids don’t make it, but I tried not to go down that path because it could get really depressing. My role was to bring some fun and light into their lives, and that’s what I tried to do. It could get tough, but once one of those amazing fighters got through it and you saw them happy, it was worth every bit of sadness and tears. Yes, there were times, several in fact, where I cried along with them. I hated goodbyes. Period.
“Emma!” a voice broke out the second I knocked and entered her room. “You’re finally here.” Warm, brown eyes lit up as she held out her small arms, ready for my hug. “How was Vancouver? How’s your boyfriend?” she shot out question after question.
“Vancouver—what I saw of it—was good…and yes, I saw my boyfriend.” My arms wrapped around her skinny, small body while I told myself to get it together and not cry because she’d lost weight since I saw her last. “I noticed that you brushed your hair today, good girl.” I smiled before I sat next to her on her bed, curling the small strands of her hair that were close to her eyes behind her ears.
“Yeah, Miss Flo said that I should always take note of my appearance if I’m having visitors.” She sounded tired, but tried to sound like she wasn’t. Her medications always made her lethargic. “Will you ever bring Bass here? I’d love to meet him, you know. I think he’s the hottest man on the planet.”
This girl loved Bass. I was actually going to drag him here the second he came back because Angela would go gaga if the guy she dubbed “the hottest man on the planet” would come in and visit her.
“I doubt you’ve ever met the rest of the hottest male species, but I’ll take your word for it. Bass is kinda hot.” I grinned at her before I stood up and checked on the things she wanted to do for an hour. Usually, she liked me to read her stories, but now, it seemed she was up for storytelling too…she wanted me to give her all the details of my trip.
I did, after I took out the X-rated parts.
After spending a few hours at the hospital, I pulled up on the driveway just as Carter did. I barely had my door cracked open before he came running and opened it himself.
“How’s my baby doing?”
Here we go again. “Why are you here?” I asked as I got out of the car. Images of that body shot played in my head. Jesus…give me a breather.
“Lindsey’s here and she texted me to bring her some In-N’-Out since she’s starving.”
My eyes look at his empty hands.
“It’s in the car. Just thought I say hi before going in.” Carter kissed my cheek. “Miss you, Em,” he whispered then jogged back towards his car to get the food.
Shaking my head, I let out a long breath before walking towards the main entrance. I barely stepped into the house before I heard Lindsey. “Carter is that you?” her voice echoed through the house.
“Emma here. He’s outside,” I called out, yelling at whichever direction. Where was she anyway?
Lindsey came running down the stairs. “Thank goodness—if you happened to be Amber, I sure as hell didn’t want to see her lying face.”
“I’ve missed you, too.” I reached over and gave her a quick hug before looking at her straight in the eye. “Don’t you think it’s time to bury the hatchet?”
“My ass!” She looked at me then at the opening door, grinning at her brother. “You rock, bro. I’m starving. A woman can only eat so much lamb chops and steaks before craving a good burger,” she blurted out, hopping away towards Carter, grabbing her food and then speed walking to the kitchen to eat. “Stop staring at each other, come here and entertain me, please,” Lindsey yelled from the kitchen.
Carter rolled his eyes before cocking his head to the s
ide for me to follow him into the kitchen. He got there first and seated himself across from Lindsey. His serious expression came into place. “So, why is it that I’m the last person to find out that you were married before?”
Lindsey took her time chewing while I snatched a few fries, smiling at the brother and sister.
“I’m divorced, didn’t you get the memo?” she said before sipping her soda.
He glared at her. “You’re crazy.”
“It’s true love. Of course, it’s crazy.”
“So your boyfriend is your ex-husband. Makes sense.” He nodded his head, looking at Lindsey like she was the most confusing thing.
Let’s face it, she truly was.
Carter pressed his lips together. “You’re not getting married again anytime soon, are you? I mean, if you are, I’d love to be there. I’m you’re brother, in case you forgot about that important fact.”
“I wanted to, after his grandfather suggested it…but this sucker didn’t want to marry me again.” Lindsey sighed. “I don’t fucking get it.”
“Maybe because you went to Brody. That’s what,” Carter interjected, leaning back against his seat. “He asked me to ask you, by the way, if you guys could talk. Or maybe all three of you could discuss this. We’re all childhood friends and treating each other this way is kind of bullshit, don’t you think?”
“You know what I think, so let’s not go there.”
Then the silent eye war began.
Time to dash into my bedroom, I thought as I cleared my throat. “Nice seeing you guys. Have a good night.”
Without breaking his eye war, Carter spoke to me, “Love you, Em.”
I shot out of there in a flash, but I heard Lindsey’s snort before I was truly out of earshot.
The Mason siblings were a fantastically confusing duo.
Chapter 6
Emma
Back in my room, my video call with Bass was thirty minutes away, so I took a quick shower and decided to check my emails. One came from Barbara, bringing awesome news.
When the video call came through Facetime, I was left wanting. Bass had sweats on, nothing more. Did he need to make me go wild with need ogling up those pecs? Damn him!
“Been looking forward to this all day long. I’ve missed you!” He was grinning from ear to ear, scratching his growing stubble on the side, eyes sparkling, while I tried to control the urge to cry and laugh at the same time.
I missed him so fucking much, but I didn’t want to be a whiny, needy girlfriend, so instead, I settled for, “I missed you, too. How was filming today?”
“Same old.” His tongue came out, licking his bottom lip while staring at me on the screen. “Enough about me. Let’s focus on you.”
This was a good window as any. “Babe, GQ wants to do another cover.” Last time was fun, but since I was with Bass now, I thought it was important to bring it up. It was, after all, a risqué shoot.
My announcement made him groan.
“I’m doing it,” I immediately inserted in-between his groans, so that I could save myself the awkward silence.
Why was he turning red? What the heck?
He looked away, smiling. “That spread you did last year…gave me a lot of sleepless nights.”
No wonder he was reddening. Naughty boy.
Raising my brow, I teased him some more. “Sleepless night doing what exactly?”
“Wishing I never let you walk away.” He sobered up, blue eyes down cast as he played with his phone.
After learning about his parents’ intention, Bass had been more serious lately, like he was guarded, though at the same time, he was more attentive. I wasn’t sure, but he was always texting me thinking of you at all times of the day. It would just be random, too. It was a cute way to let me know that I wasn’t forgotten. Yet no matter how much we spoke and chatted, it didn’t beat having him here in Cali.
“Well, if you really want to know…each pose, I imagined it was you watching me.” I watched his reaction turn from surprised to pleased.
“Right. Now I’m even more curious what those thoughts let you think?” His wickedness was too much.
My damp hair was all over the place, but I could care less because, right this second, all I cared about was making my baby happy. “That first time we did backdoor in Aspasia. That’s what.” I watched as Bass leaned back, interlocking his hands behind his head, flexing that chiseled chest and those abs. “I never felt so sexy and so powerful as I did watching you try to control yourself—sweaty and panting—but when things became more heated, you just took what you wanted…with no apologies. Fucking me with love from an uncontrolled animal.”
Bass swallowed his saliva. Mouth partly open as I looked at him thinking…hard. Yeah, hard was the operative word, if I must say so boldly. “Babe, why aren’t you saying anything?”
“I’m contemplating if I should jack off right now while I beg you to strip for me or should I hop on the red eye and make you feel that uncontrolled animal in me,” Bass said with all seriousness.
If he decided to hop on the red eye, what if he missed his flight? I wouldn’t have that happen. “Babe, don’t even think about that,” I tried to dissuade him. “Besides, you can’t go anywhere, you’re sporting a rock.”
“You like teasing me don’t you, Emma?”
He was so serious. I knew he was getting worked up. His voice changed when he was turned on; it got huskier. “I do? Will junior like it if we make a tape together? I mean—we’re going to be away from each other a lot…I just thought, you know—”
“Fuck,” he growled, closing his eyes. “You. Sex. Video,” he muttered, shaking his head. “You’re killing me here.”
Hey, I was only trying to think of his ‘needs’. “So you don’t want it?”
Bass opened his eyes, piercing me with them. “Fuck, I want—need—it so badly. You know I’m a visual man; I love seeing you in all ways possible.”
He was a visual man. I knew that, yes, however why did I get the wrong feeling somehow, like this was nothing surprising? “You’ve done this before, huh?” A deep ache settled in my stomach.
Bass took a moment before responding, watching my reaction. “I have. Yes.”
Shit. I knew that was a big possibility. Even though I was trying to get over it, the feeling wouldn’t go away. “With who?” I wanted to be his first in something. After this whole baby thing, I felt as though I was competing for memories.
“Exes,” he said, cautiously.
Lydia? Who? Dammit, I needed names. “Do you still have them?”
“Some.”
Cryptic much? “Where?” I pressed.
Bass looked uncomfortable now, like he was on the hot seat. “In my computer.”
“And your phone?” I kept on going. Jealousy was a bad thing. Rearing it in sometimes worked, but right now, it was speeding away, taking over me.
“There’s a few there, too.” He paused. “Emma, I don’t think this is something you should be worried about. You look like you’re about to cry—I’m going to delete—”
I interrupted him. “Those being your favorites, right?”
Bass groaned. “They were—before I got addicted to you.” He made a loud huffing sound, trying to calm himself. “I actually forgot about them until you brought it up. I’ll delete them the second we hang up.”
“No—don’t. Well, not yet. I’m curious…” I was really going to go there. “Can I see them?”
Bass jumped from his seat, standing as he looked at me like I’d lost my mind. “Why would you want to do that? Doing that will only hurt you, Emma.”
I wasn’t listening. “But you did this before me, right?”
He raked a hand over his hair, muttering, “Yes, of course, but even then—I don’t think you should.”
“Please, Bass. I promise I won’t be mad.” For now.
He stood with his glorified chest, displeased as he looked at me. “I’ll think about it.”
“Promise?”
These videos were going to dominate my thoughts. I knew it. I wouldn’t let it go until I saw what they were. My insecurities had spiraled out of control after Nikki. This was going to get worse if I didn’t stop myself sometime soon.
“I love you,” I said to the man who made my heart ache like no other man could.
“You can’t use that to gain favor, Emma.”
Too bad, I was. Or I might be endangered of losing it completely. “I do.”
Questions now bombarded me. My insecurity was blasting my confidence away, yet I needed to see those tapes. It was sick, but heck; I wanted to see if Bass was any different with them than with me.
Chapter 7
Bass
Was Emma pulling my leg? She couldn’t be serious, right? What woman would ask to see her boyfriend with someone else? I didn’t fucking get it.
Knowing quite well that she wasn’t going to be okay after our conversation, I took it as a sign and made a few important calls. Yes, some might disagree with my actions, but as of right now, this was a fucking emergency. My delicate and intricate webbed plans were about to go down the drain, and I wasn’t about to let that go to waste because of a somewhat petty misunderstanding. I knew what was important and what came first, that was that. The rest would fall into place if I got this one thing right.
A sleepy yawn and a quick rub of my eyes later, I finally arrived in Los Angeles. Add another hour, give or take, I reached my destination. Thank goodness, my driver, Lou, hadn’t minded chauffeuring me at this time. When I was in the city, it was a given, and since I hadn’t been around, I kind of felt bad waking the poor man up. It would’ve been an easy thing had I called a private cab, but since the paps were following me everywhere, I didn’t want them to sense any misconception when it came to Emma. The media was still fifty-fifty when it came to her after Nikki.