“What? You can’t handle prison rules?” Kim elbowed him, making him sway for a moment.
Ryan pulled his hat up and over to the side, his eyes finally in view. “I can handle prison rules, it’s the cheating when there is supposed to be rules that bothers me. I lost twenty bucks!”
“Oh no!” Beth said, laughing. “Did you lose money, Baby?” Chad pursed his lips and nodded, still brooding. “Aw!” she said, rubbing his back.
We sat at the table, discussing the game. Our laughter saturated the room, causing the other patrons to stare. After a while, Ryan leaned over and pulled my chair closer to him, the legs grating against the floor. He stretched his arm around the back of my chair and smiled, flashing the deep dimple in his cheek.
Ryan’s destiny to be my future husband popped into my head, and a strange ache overwhelmed me. Ryan’s future was forever changed the second Jared sat on that bench. I would never take that moment back, but I cared about Ryan. I wanted him to be happy, and that was impossible if I stayed in the picture. One of these days I would have to remove myself completely from his life, and because of that, either Claire or Jared would be separated from their family.
Ryan gripped my shoulder and pulled me to his side. “Hey. What’s wrong?”
“Hmmm?” I said, distracted.
“She’s been like that the whole time she’s been here,” Kim complained.
Ryan hugged me to him again and I turned, throwing my arms around him. He tensed, obviously not expecting my sudden display of affection. After his initial shock wore off, he rested his chin on my shoulder and enveloped me in his arms.
He puffed a short laugh. “What’s going on, Nigh?” he whispered into my neck.
I shook my head. I couldn’t tell him, and even if I did, I didn’t want him to know.
“We’re, uh…we’re going to take off,” Chad said.
“Is it all right if I catch a ride with you?” Kim asked.
I pulled away from Ryan and looked up at my friends. “It’s Friday. Did you want to go out later?”
Kim shot a look at Ryan and then back at me. “I already have plans. Tomorrow night?”
I nodded. “Okay.”
“I’ll catch a ride with Nina,” Ryan said.
Beth and I both looked at Chad, who shrugged. “Cool. See ya.” He lifted his hand to wave and they filed out of the coffee shop.
I looked at Ryan, embarrassed. “It’s official. I’m a freak.”
“You’re not a freak. Chad was planning on taking Beth back with him, anyway. They have dinner plans.”
“I cleared the table in less than two minutes. I’m a freak.”
“You want to grab some dinner?”
I tried to think of a delicate way to turn him down, but he spoke before anything came to mind.
“We’ll just grab something quick…go through a drive thru. Me and Josh are going to grab a few beers later, anyway,” he explained.
“Oh. Yeah, okay,” I said, standing up.
We sat in the parking lot closest to Andrews devouring our fast food. The slogan game had kept us entertained since we left the coffee shop. Ryan countered my feeble attempts to stump him so quickly that I couldn’t help but double over with laughter.
“Have you been practicing?” I giggled, exhausted from laughing so hard.
“I’m not gonna lie. I’ve had a lot of time on my hands, waiting to heal,” he chuckled, throwing up a piece of chicken and catching it in his mouth. “What are you doing tonight?” he asked.
“I’m probably going to get some laundry together, take it over to Jared’s,” I said without thinking.
“You’re staying over there again? I thought you said you weren’t moving in,” he said, this time without his usual attitude.
“I’m not,” I snapped, waiting for him to come back with something spiteful.
Ryan sighed and took my hand. “I don’t want to argue about it anymore, Nigh. I’ve said everything I needed to say on the subject.”
“I don’t want us to fight, either. I want us to be able to hang out and be friends like we used to. I miss you,” I said, suddenly hopeful that we could get beyond all of the infatuation nonsense.
“I miss you, too. I’ll quit being a jerk,” he said, brushing my bangs out of my eyes. “When you hugged me tonight, I realized how ridiculous I’ve been. I don’t want to lose you, Nina. It doesn’t matter if you’re with him, or me, or anyone else. What matters is that we’re friends, and that you can count on me being here when you need me.”
I pulled in a shallow breath through my nose, trying to keep my eyes from glossing over with tears. He didn’t know that we would have to lose each other if he wanted to be happy. I just smiled and nodded my head, and Ryan hugged me once more.
“Truce?”
“Truce,” I smiled.
He walked to his dormitory and I headed to Andrews, feeling morose. I pulled out my cell phone and called Jared, who picked up on the first ring.
“Hey,” he answered, sounding a bit sad himself.
“I’m just going to grab a few things from my room and then I’ll be ready.”
As I rounded the corner, Jared came into view, his cell phone to his ear. He pulled up one corner of his mouth into a contrived half-smile. I put my cell phone away and wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his chest. He could sense my feelings for Ryan, and I was ashamed for feeling the way I did. It wasn’t fair to either of them.
An awkward silence festered in the Escalade until we pulled up to the curb in front of his apartment.
“Nina…,”
“It’s okay,” I interrupted him. I wasn’t sure what he was going to say, but I didn’t want to waste time discussing my feelings for Ryan. Jared felt he was getting in the way of fate, but I knew what I wanted. There would be no compromise.
We walked hand in hand to the loft, and I could feel the worry radiating from him. I hung my coat on the rack and immediately went to the kitchen, praying there were dishes to be done or to put away; anything to keep me busy.
Jared went to his extravagant stereo system and tinkered with the multitude of buttons. While I put away dishes in various cabinets, a familiar song permeated the room. I felt Jared’s arms surround me, the heat of his skin sinking into my back. His cheek touched mine as he pulled me into his chest, and I closed my eyes when he whispered into my ear.
“Do you recognize this song?”
I simply nodded, listening to the music. It was the song we danced to at the pub. I remembered that moment as if it were just hours before, and yet it felt like a lifetime ago.
“What is it?” I asked.
“It’s called ‘Little Heaven’.” His lips peppered my neck with soft, tiny kisses, working his way up to my ear.
I smiled. “That’s appropriate.”
Jared turned me slowly to face him and I watched the clouds roll in, darkening his eyes. His jaw tensed as he scanned my face.
“I could step aside, Nina. I could step aside and let you be with who you’re supposed to be with. If I was any less selfish…I would. But even after all of my stupid mistakes, I still think I can make you happy.
“If it’s what you want, I’ll step aside,” he shook his head, “but if it’s not…I’ll fight fate. I’ll fight Heaven, and Hell, and everything in between to keep you.”
I stood there, stunned. Anything I said would pale in comparison. The storms in his eyes raged stronger than I’d ever seen them.
“Jared…,” I struggled with what I wanted to say. Jared swallowed, sensing the turmoil within me. I shook my head and he let go of my waist, bracing himself for my next words. But there would be none.
I inched up on the balls of my feet and paused. My eyes moved from his eyes to his mouth. Jared stood motionless, waiting for judgment.
I pressed my lips to his, and he cautiously kissed me back. My hands held each side of his face, and I worked my lips against his, sliding my fingers through the back of his hair. Jared’s hands returned
to my waist as the kiss intensified. My lips parted and he pulled me to him without hesitation. His doubt melted away, he knew my decision.
Against his body I let out an involuntary moan, causing a chain reaction. Almost simultaneously, I lifted Jared’s shirt as he finished the task by yanking it over his head, my knee inched up and Jared firmly grabbed it, pulling it higher up his side, and then he eagerly lifted me on top of the counter.
I wrapped my legs around him, digging my fingers into the bare flesh of his back to draw him closer. His hands gripped my thighs, impatiently pulling me to the edge of the counter. Jared’s lips were urgent, but in a new way. His wasn’t the kiss that he used to tell me he loved me, or to tell me goodbye. He was giving in.
Jared lifted my sweater over my head and I let out a satisfied sigh when he pressed his bare chest against mine. I pressed my lips harder against his; we still weren’t close enough. My breath grew ragged and uneven as he impatiently pulled me from the counter and walked across the room—my legs still wrapped around him—to climb the stairs. As he held me, he never took his lips from mine.
With one hand on my back, and the other on the mattress, he gently lowered me to his bed. His lips caressed every inch of my neck, and my body shivered in anticipation. I slid my hand down the perfect ripples of his chest and stomach, and pulled his belt free of the loops, fumbling with the buckle. A low moan emanated from his lips when I finally unfastened it and his mouth readily returned to mine.
He pulled away with a quick jerk, his eyes unfocused.
“What?” I asked, pushing myself up on my elbows.
His jaw tensed and he closed his eyes in frustration. “Claire.”
In the next moment, Claire unlocked the door and opened it without knocking. Jared stood at the top of the stairs and glared down at his sister.
“Busy?” Claire asked.
I covered my mouth to stifle a laugh, thinking of the view from Claire’s perspective. It wouldn’t take much for her to imagine what we’d been up to.
“I’m going to take that key back if you don’t start calling ahead of time,” Jared growled.
“You say that as if I can’t pick your lock in three seconds.”
“I’m serious, Claire,” Jared said so quietly that I barely heard him.
Well, I’m sorry,” she said, not sounding sorry at all. “Bex left for training an hour ago and mom is all weepy. Ryan is in bed asleep and lucky me, my Taleh doesn’t have half the police force and various criminals after him.”
Jared turned to face me and his expression morphed from anger to an apologetic expression.
“She’s here for the night,” he explained, going to his closet and pulling a t-shirt off the hanger. He seemed to have thought better of it, putting the shirt back and walking across the room to search through my suitcase for a pair of pajamas.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself if you put one of my t-shirts on,” he said quietly, handing me the pajamas. I smiled at him, amused.
Claire groaned in disgust downstairs. “Gross.”
Clothes shot up and over the railing, landing at Jared’s feet. It was the shirts we had left behind on the kitchen floor. The refrigerator door opened, and the sounds of Claire rummaging for food made Jared roll his eyes.
“I’m going to take a quick shower,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
I smiled. “A cold one?”
“Yeah,” he said, turning toward the bathroom.
“I could keep you company.”
Jared froze in mid-step, pausing for just a moment before closing the bathroom door behind him.
I changed while he was in the shower, feeling a bit guilty for teasing him. I understood his frustration all too well. I leaned back on the bed, chewing on my thumb nail and smiling at what had almost happened.
Chapter Eleven
The Hunt
“I’ll be good,” I promised.
Jared came out of the bathroom in only a pair of shorts. He stood several feet from me,
hesitating to come to bed. “Maybe you should take a cold shower, too. I don’t think it I can concentrate with you….”
“Aroused?” I said, quickly pressing my lips together to stifle a laugh.
His mouth fell open in shock and I cackled, too pleased with the reaction to help myself.
Jared smiled and nodded, complaisant to my playful badgering. He crawled into bed and propped his head up with his hand.
I sat against the headboard and sighed. “She wasn’t serious, right? About the half-the-police-force thing?”
His face fell. “I won’t let anything happen to you,” he said, sliding his fingers between mine.
“Why are they after me?”
Jared cursed in Spanish under his breath resulting in Claire giggling from somewhere downstairs.
“They’re not after you, sweetheart. They’re after something of Jack’s. They just think you know where it is.”
“They’re after the Port of Providence file?”
“Dawson said they want to dispose of the evidence Jack compiled that proves they’re dirty, but they’re looking for something else—something that’s contained within the file.”
“So, we go to my parents’ house, figure it out and get rid of it. Toss it off of a bridge or something.”
“That wouldn’t help us, Nina,” Jared said, shaking his head.
“Why not?” I grimaced.
“Whatever it is, it was worth going after Jack Grey. No one does that unless it’s…it’s something big, Nina. Something we don’t want to be caught without.”
“What are you talking about?” I was frustrated with the circles we seemed to be talking in.
“I shouldn’t tell you this.” He pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger.
“Do it, anyway,” I snapped.
A heavy expression settled on his face. “Jack didn’t die from the car accident. He died of complications from a gunshot wound to the chest.”
It took a moment for my brain to wrap around what he’d said, but once I processed the words, I was instantly angry. “What?”
Jared put his hand on mine. “Gabe did everything in his power to try to save him, but Jack was in over his head.”
“I thought Gabe was indestructible. Wasn’t he one-hundred percent angel?”
“They threatened the only thing more important to him than Jack.”
“More important than his own life?” I asked, skeptical.
Jared nodded; the severity in his face was a bit frightening. “My mother. They were in my home the day Jack was shot. Claire and I had taken Bex to the airport, so Gabe had no choice but to leave him. My father knew what would happen if he left Jack alone, but his life meant nothing without my mother. Jack was shot en route to his office downtown. He did crash into a guard rail, but it was the bullet that led to his death.”
“You’re saying the men that want this package murdered my father?” Jared confirmed with a nod and I felt heat burn from every pore in my face. “I don’t care what it is. We’re getting rid of it. They will never get their hands on it.”
“Nina, I know you’re upset, but we need to think about this. They want something in that file so badly they went up against Jack and my father, and they knew what Gabe was capable of. I’d rather have it in our possession so we have something to barter with if need be.”
Tears filled my eyes and Jared wrapped his arms around me. I mourned once again for my father. I kept losing him over and over again, with one horrible truth after another.
I cried myself asleep, and when I awoke, Jared comforted me once again when the news from the night before replayed in my memory.
“I need to do something. I can’t just sit here,” I said, rushing over to my suitcase.
“I’m going to figure this out, Nina. Just give me a day or two to decide our next move.”
“I can’t wait another second,” I said, my mind racing to form a plan. When the idea struck, I paus
ed. “I’m going back to my parents’. The answers are there.” I yanked a t-shirt over my head and the first pair of jeans I touched.
“We don’t have to go now,” he argued.
“Yes we do,” I said, pulling on my shoes while hopping to the stairs.
Jared scrambled from the bed. The hangers in his closet clanged against each other, and within seconds he was behind me, fully dressed. “Not exactly how I wanted to spend the weekend,” he said, frowning.
“C’mon. Let’s go. Vaminos!” I said, rushing him out the door.
In my parents’ home, Jared followed me up the stairs to Jack’s office. He watched me locate the keys to Cynthia’s safe, followed me to her study, and then pulled the plant to the floor without effort. I used the key to gain access to the papers and files inside, placing them in somewhat organized piles.
For two hours we searched the documents, separating what we thought would be useful. One photo caught my eye. I held it out in front of me, staring at it, hoping I would recognize what it was that drew me in.
“He looks familiar to you?” Jared prompted.
“Something about his eyes…I can’t put my finger on it.”
Jared pulled a black wallet from his jacket pocket and tossed it into my lap; it was the one he had taken the night Ryan was stabbed. I took a closer look at the metal object embedded into the black leather. It was a badge.
I gasped, pointing at the picture. “This is the man that wanted my ring. This is Grahm.”
Jared nodded.
“They were all cops?” I said, shaking my head in disbelief. “But why would they…?” My eyes wandered to my hand.
Jared stared at it as well. “The ring must be the key to something.”
“It doesn’t make any sense,” I whispered. I looked at the papers for a moment and then rifled through them.
“What is it?” Jared asked.
“There’s a receipt in here for the purchase of my ring. I didn’t think about it before, but there has to be a connection,” I said, impatient with the endless stacks. “Why else would it be here with important business documents?”
My eyes widened with excitement when I found the thin carbon copy. Jared leaned over my shoulder to take a look for himself.
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