by Lucy Gordon
From the other end of the phone Darius could hear his little girl chuckling. He grinned.
‘Yes, I’m really making him work,’ Harriet said. ‘He’s surprisingly good. Let’s face it, he looks like a wimp-oh, dear, I shouldn’t have said that. If you could see how he’s glaring at me-’
‘I’m not,’ Darius said indignantly.
‘Anyway, he’s not as much of a wimp as he looks. He can manage heavy weights-much to my surprise-’
Darius’s indignation had faded and he was looking at her with resigned amusement. She laughed back at him, sending a silent message. That’ll teach you! And receiving his message in return. Just you wait!
Harriet rattled away for a while, enjoying the sound of Frankie’s delight. Then Mark took over, wanting to know if she’d been sailing. She’d taken her little yacht out only that morning and had plenty to tell him. It was a happy conversation.
At last she handed the phone back to Darius.
‘It’s a conspiracy,’ he told his son. ‘She’s as bad as you are, or you’re as bad as she is. I’m not sure which.’
Sounding relaxed and happy, he bid his children goodnight, then turned to her, laughing and exasperated in equal measure.
‘Harriet, you little wretch! What are you trying to do to me? Wimp, indeed!’
‘Shame!’ she soothed him. ‘All those hours spent in the gym, for nothing.’
‘All right, enjoy your laugh. I suppose I asked for it. And thank you. You did far more than I hoped for.’ He looked around at the large boxes. ‘You really have just had a delivery, haven’t you?’
‘Yes, a big one. Hey, what are you doing?’
‘Well, I’ve got to prove I’m not a wimp, haven’t I?’ he said, beginning to unpack. ‘Call it my gratitude.’
He wouldn’t let her refuse, but worked for two hours fetching, carrying, lifting weights, finally breathing out hard and saying, ‘I’m ready for a drink. Come on.’
The glass of ale in the pub that followed was in the same spirit of cheerful friendliness, and when they finally said goodnight she was able to feel confident that she’d successfully returned their relationship to safe territory.
She was to discover her mistake.
It was three days before she saw him again, racing towards her on the beach as she and Phantom emerged from the water, seizing her shoulders as soon as he reached her.
‘You’ve got to help me,’ he said. ‘I know you won’t want to but-’
‘Why wouldn’t I want to?’
‘Well, I never stop asking for things, do I? It’s always you giving and me taking-’
‘Darius, calm down and tell me what it is.’
‘Mary called me. The kids can’t stay with their gran; she’s gone down with a bug. It’s not serious but they have to leave, and they want to come here.’
‘Of course they want to be with you.’
‘Yes, but Mary will only agree if you’re part of the deal. I reckon it’s really you they want to see rather than me.’
‘Nonsense, you’re their father.’
‘Yes, but I’m still learning. Mary relies on you. If you don’t say yes, she won’t say yes. Please, Harriet.’
It was unfair of him, she thought, to look at her like that. How could she be sensible in the face of that imploring gaze, reminding her of his nicer side-the one that brought her dangerously close to falling in love?
‘Of course I’ll help you,’ she said, ‘as long as we agree beforehand what we’re going to-’
She stopped as his cellphone had rung.
‘Mary?’ he said urgently. ‘Yes, I’ve asked her and she’s agreeable. It’s going to be all right-what’s that?-she’s right here.’ He handed her the phone.
‘Harriet?’ said Mary’s urgent voice. ‘Oh, thank heavens. We’ve got a disaster on our hands but I know you can take care of it.’
‘Calm down; I’ll be glad to help, and I’m sure they’ll love the island.’
‘Oh, yes, if you could have heard them talking after you spoke to them the other day. All I need to know is that you’ll be there.’
‘And I will.’
‘They’re well-behaved children. You won’t have any trouble making them go to bed at the right time, and they’re not picky eaters-’
‘Mary, hang on, I didn’t mean-’
But it was too late. With mounting dismay, Harriet realised that Mary had assumed that she was living with Darius and would be there for the children all the time.
‘You don’t understand,’ she said frantically. ‘I’m not actually-’
But she was watching Darius, and what she saw checked her. He’d followed her thoughts and was silently begging her not to destroy his hope.
‘Not what?’ Mary asked.
‘I’m not-’ She could tell that he was holding his breath. ‘Not…not a very good cook,’ she floundered.
‘That’s all right,’ Mary assured her cheerfully. ‘He says Kate’s a terrific cook. All I’m asking you to do is be nice to them, and I know you will because-’
Harriet barely heard the rest. Dismayed, she realised that she’d committed herself to moving in with him, living close to him day and night, unable to escape the attraction that threatened to overwhelm her.
She’d been caught unawares, but now it was done and it was too late to undo. She could never bring herself to kill the blazing hope she could see in him. Dazed, she bid Mary farewell, handed over the phone and wandered to the water’s edge.
What have I done? she whispered to herself. Whatever have I done?
Then she heard him calling her name, and turned to see him following her. The next moment he’d flung his arms around her.
‘Thank you!’ he said. ‘Thank you!’
He didn’t try to kiss her, just held her with hands that gripped so tight it was almost painful. But she didn’t even think of escape. There was a sweetness in his passionate gratitude that made her heart beat faster.
He drew back and she almost gasped at the sight of his face, lined with emotion, confusion, anguish and a kind of fierce joy that he himself didn’t truly believe existed.
‘Thank you,’ he whispered again. ‘Thank you, thank you.’
Now she knew what she’d done, and nothing in the world would ever make her regret it.
‘I’m going to collect them in London tomorrow,’ he said. ‘Will you come with me?’
‘If I can. I’ll have to call the lifeboat station so that they’ve got a replacement on call. I’ll do it now.’
At the station she was assured that there was no problem. There were plenty of volunteers to fill her place.
‘It doesn’t give you much time to move in,’ Darius said, ‘but I’ll help you. And don’t worry about anything. I know you didn’t mean to live there but you can make everything just as you like it. Your word will be law, and you can choose your room. I won’t trouble you, my word on it, and if you-’
‘Stop, stop!’ she said, laughing and touching his lips gently. ‘You’re babbling.’
He removed her fingers, but not before laying the lightest possible kiss on them, just enough to be felt, not enough for offence.
‘I can’t help it,’ he said humbly. ‘It matters so much, I can’t risk anything going wrong.’
‘Nothing’s going to go wrong,’ she promised. ‘Now, we have a lot of work to do.’
‘Yes, let’s make a start. And you.’ This last was addressed to Phantom, who’d nudged his hand.
‘He’s included?’ Harriet asked eagerly.
‘You don’t think I’d leave him out, do you? The kids will love him. Now I come to think of it, he’s almost more essential than you are.’
She chuckled. ‘I think so too. Let’s go.’
As they walked home his business side reasserted itself.
‘What about your shop? You’ll hardly have any time there for the next few weeks.’
‘My assistant is reliable, and there’s a temporary worker I sometimes use. She’s very
good.’
‘Fine, hire her full-time at my expense. I pay her wages, is that clear? No argument.’
‘I wasn’t going to give you one,’ she said. ‘You’re not the only one who can do business.’
She danced ahead of him, whistling.
CHAPTER TEN
H ARRIET arranged the extra worker as soon as she got home, while Darius called Kate to alert her about Harriet’s arrival.
They spent the rest of the day moving her things into Giant’s Beacon. Kate ceremoniously showed her round the four available bedrooms, promising to get to work on whichever Harriet chose.
‘You’ll probably prefer the one at the end of the corridor,’ Darius suggested, bland-faced.
It was certainly the most ‘proper’ room, being furthest from his, and having a lock on the door. It was also extremely ugly.
The nicest room was at the front of the house, just above the front door. There were two bay windows, a thick, newly laid carpet and a large comfortable-looking bed.
It was also directly opposite Darius’s room.
‘I wouldn’t choose this if I were you,’ Darius said. ‘It’s much too close to that fellow, and I’ve heard he’s a bad character. Give him a wide berth.’
‘And you’d know him better than anyone else, I suppose,’ she riposted.
‘Definitely. You shouldn’t even have been shown this room, even though it’s the most comfortable, and lovely in the mornings when the sun comes in.’
‘Yes, I noticed it was facing the dawn.’
‘But it doesn’t have a lock on the door,’ he pointed out.
‘Ah, but he’s promised not to trouble me. If he keeps his word, why would I need a lock?’
‘That’s very true.’
‘And if he doesn’t-I’ll set Phantom on him.’
‘There’s a threat to frighten a man.’
‘So I think-’ She threw herself onto the soft mattress, and Phantom jumped up beside her. ‘Yes, I think we’ll have this one.’ She turned to her companion. ‘Do you agree?’
Woof!
‘Then if everyone’s satisfied,’ Darius said, ‘we’ll call it a day, and be ready to leave early tomorrow.’
The helicopter was there on the dot, sweeping them off to the airport near London. From there a car took them to the house where the children were staying. Mark and Frankie were watching from the window, and yelled with delight when they saw them.
‘Dad! You came!’ Frankie cried.
‘But of course I came. I said I would.’
They didn’t reply, but Harriet wondered how often in the past he hadn’t been there when he said he would.
The housekeeper appeared, saying that their hostess wouldn’t come downstairs because of her illness, but she sent her thanks and best wishes. Darius returned a message of condolence, and they were ready to go.
As they left the house Harriet happened to notice the children exchanging glances, and was almost certain that she heard Mark whisper, ‘I told you she’d come.’
On the journey home they made her talk about Herringdean, yearning for the moment when they could look down at it from high in the air. When that moment finally came they were speechless, gazing open-mouthed at so much beauty. Darius, watching them, understood.
‘That’s what I thought when I first saw it,’ he said. ‘The loveliest place in the world.’
They nodded agreement, but Harriet detected a slight bafflement in their manner. Their father had actually said that? Who was he trying to kid?
At last it was time to land and make their way to Giant’s Beacon. As she had expected, their first meeting with Phantom was joyful. Since he asked nothing better than to be the centre of attention all the time and they had lots of attention to give, they forged an instant three-way friendship.
After supper she and Kate saw them to bed with the promise of plenty of action next day. They were already yawning and climbed into bed without argument.
Downstairs, Darius poured her a glass of wine and raised his own glass in salute.
‘To you,’ he said. ‘Without you, none of this would be happening.’
‘But it is happening. Now it’s up to you to make the best of it.’
‘Did you see their faces when I told them I felt the same as they when I first saw Herringdean? They didn’t really believe I could feel that way.’ He added wryly, ‘Any more than you did.’
‘I wish you’d stop brooding about that. It was a lifetime ago. You’re not the same man.’
‘Maybe not,’ he murmured. ‘But who am I now?’
‘You’ll find that out with them.’
‘And you?’
‘No. This is you and them. I’m not really a part of it.’
‘That’s not true and you know it,’ he said quietly.
Suddenly she was faced with a dilemma. His words offered her the chance to turn the conversation in a direction that tempted her. Try as she might to stop her heart inclining towards him, it seemed to have a life of its own, beating more intensely when he was near, bringing her alive in his presence in a way that wasn’t true at any other time. A little cleverness, a little scheming, and she could secure him. It would be so easy, if only-
If only she could bring herself to settle for second best, for a marriage in which she gave love in return only for gratitude.
‘Why did you sigh?’ he asked. ‘Did I offend you by saying that?’
‘No, of course not.’
‘I really forced you here against your will, didn’t I? I’m sorry.’
‘There’s nothing to be sorry for. Stop being so gloomy. Now, I’m going to take Phantom out for a walk before I go to bed.’
‘I’ll come with you.’
‘Better not,’ she said quickly. ‘He wants me to himself for a while. Goodnight.’
She slipped away before he could say any more, escaping from the danger that always hovered in his presence these days, hurrying out of the house, signalling Phantom to follow her. Darius watched them run away in the moonlight, and only when they were out of sight did he climb the stairs to find two little faces looking down at him.
‘Dad, Dad!’
‘What are you two doing up? You should be asleep.’
‘Harry’s gone,’ Frankie wailed. ‘She took Phantom with her.’
‘Don’t panic. They’ve just gone for a walk. They’ll be back.’
‘Promise!’ she demanded.
‘Word of honour. And if she doesn’t I’ll go and fetch them. Now, back to bed.’
They vanished obediently and he, being naïve, assumed they had obeyed him. It was only later, as he strolled in the garden watching for Harriet’s return, that he realised they were looking out of the window over his head.
‘Is she coming yet?’ Mark called.
Darius was about to admonish them when he had the strangest sensation that Harriet was there, reading his mind, shaking her head in disapproval. Enlightenment dawned.
‘Come on down and we’ll wait together,’ he called back.
They darted away, appearing in the garden a moment later. Kate brought out milkshakes and they sat around a small table, chatting to pass the time. Darius described his first encounter with Phantom. Once, the thought of anyone, even-or especially-his own children-knowing about that undignified incident would have filled him with horror. Now, he found himself describing it in detail, relishing their shrieks of laughter.
Harriet would have been proud of him, he felt.
‘Perhaps we should go with her next time,’ Frankie suggested.
‘You don’t have to keep guard over her,’ Darius said. ‘She’s not going to run away.’
‘Really? She’ll stay with us for ever and ever?’
‘That’s for her to say,’ Darius said quietly.
A mysterious understanding was creeping over him. Like himself, they had seen Harriet in a light that set her apart from everyone else, as though she possessed a special power that acted like a shield against all the evil of the
world. Those she defended were safe. Those she loved were fortunate beyond their dreams.
The difference between them was that they had seen at once what he had taken time to understand. And that delay might be his undoing. But for now he must profit by her influence to find the right words for his children’s questions. He crossed his fingers, hoping against hope for wisdom.
But before he could speak Harriet again intervened to save him.
‘Here she is,’ Frankie cried, bounding up and pointing to two figures emerging from the trees.
She and Mark made off at top speed and in the riot of noisy delight nobody noticed Darius closing his eyes and thanking a merciful fate. When he was calm again he strolled towards her, calling, ‘Nice to see you back.’
Harriet smiled at him. ‘Nice to be back,’ she said.
His eyes held hers. ‘Really?’
‘Yes, really. Right, you kids. Bed.’
When that job was done she leaned against the wall, yawning. ‘I’m nodding off right here.’
‘Go and get some sleep, because you’re going to need it.’
‘You too. Goodnight.’
Harriet slept until the early hours, then got up and glanced out of the window. From here she could just see a glow of light that she knew came from Darius’s office.
Throwing on her dressing gown, she slipped downstairs. From behind the door she could hear him on the phone.
‘I accessed the website half an hour ago and there’s no doubt-I know how to fight this-I’ve already put things in place that’ll make them think twice-don’t worry, I’ve got it in hand.’
He sounded almost like the man she’d heard before vowing, ‘No mercy’, but she sensed something different. The cruelty had gone from his voice and only the determination remained.
As he hung up she opened the door and found him staring at the screen. He looked round and smiled wanly.
‘Don’t you ever sleep?’ she asked.
‘I’m trying to catch up at night so that I can be free during the day. There are things I still have to do.’
‘You poor soul. Can I do anything to help?’
‘I’d be glad of a coffee.’
She disappeared into the kitchen, returning with a full mug a few minutes later, only to find him dozing. She set down the mug and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder, so that he awoke at once, looking up at her with a faint smile. She had never seen him so vulnerable, never been so dangerously close to loving him.