by Erin Trejo
“I can’t stay long. Can you just give me a ride across town?” Terry looks as if I’ve lost my mind.
“No. You are staying with me. Even if it’s just a few nights.” I shake my head ready to protest. “Look, Jordyn. You look like you’ve been through hell. You can stay as long as you want but I want you to stay for now, ok?”
“You might not want me around after you hear what’s been going on. I wouldn’t blame you. I know I wouldn’t want me around.” Tears slide down my cheeks before she reaches up. I jerk away, yet again.
“Stop. We all make mistakes. We can talk more at the house. Come on.” She grabs my bag and walks toward her car. I follow her and climb in before I sigh. At least they won’t be looking for me with her. Not right now anyway.
“I really do appreciate this. I know I can’t pay you back right now.”
“Why don’t you want me to touch you? What happened to you?” I knew the question was going to come. How is it I know her but I can’t let her touch me? Link touched me. I let him. I actually felt something when he did it.
“You know about my dad. He did it a lot when I was younger. I ran from him and right into the devil himself. What he did to me was far worse.” I hear Terry gasp. I can’t look at her. I don’t want to see the pity that I already know is in her eyes.
“Who is he?” I blow out a breath before I turn to face her.
“He’s in a motorcycle club. He is the one that helped me get my dad put in jail but that came with a price that I wasn’t aware of at the time. He took me in but he beat me as bad as my dad. All of them did.” I see the tear roll down her cheek but she doesn’t say anything.
“Then what?” she asks, wanting to hear more.
“I was in there for a while. They caught a guy from another club and held him for a while trying to get to his president. Bone had this master plan that if he could get the guy to take me when he was rescued I could get him information from the inside. It worked, too. I did it a few times but then Link started getting suspicious of me. They all did. They had me leave and stay at one of the other guy’s apartment with Link. Everything was ok at first but the more I thought about it, the more I know I fucked up. I know that once Link learns I was the one that set up his club, he will want me dead, too. I couldn’t stay and look at him anymore. I couldn’t put him out there for Bone to hurt either.” Angry sobs rip through the car before I realize that the sound is coming from me. My heart hurts. My body is slowly shutting down on me. Nothing is ever going to be ok.
I’ve ruined the only good thing that I had in my life.
Link.
Chapter 35
Link
The place smells like a fucking piss factory.
“Hey, you seen a red-head around here. About this tall?” I ask the old man that’s leaning against the apartment wall, showing him her height with my hand.
“She left a while ago. Was stayin’ with Martha.” I look over my shoulder at the guys before looking back to the man.
“Which one?” I ask nodding to the doors on the hallway. He looks as though he isn’t going to answer when I grab him around the throat. “Which one old man?” I growl in his face.
“Three. Right there,” he says quickly. I release him and check the door. It’s unlocked. I pull my gun and cautiously step inside. I can’t believe she left me to come to this shit hole. I make my way in, only to find that it’s empty. There are no rooms in here. It’s one open floor plan. I stuff the gun back into my jeans before running my hand through my hair.
“Link. Look,” Dax says. I walk over and take the paper out of his hand and read it over.
Martha,
Thanks for your offer. I can’t stay here, though. I don’t want you in harm’s way with Roach or any of the people looking for me. Here’s $100. That’s about all I have to give right now.
Stay safe. Jordyn
I crumble the note up and throw it across the room.
“Where the hell did she get money?” Kane asks stepping up next to us.
“I hid it in the apartment. I knew she’d look.” Bomber slaps a hand on my shoulder.
“We’ll find her, brother.” I shake my head before I say, “No, we won’t. She doesn’t want to be found.”
“Since when has that stopped us?” Bash walks into the room scanning it like I did.
“Since she was lyin’ to me!” I roar. I grab the bottle and throw it at the wall, watching it shatter into a million pieces much like my world.
“She’s scared.” A little voice comes from the doorway. We all turn to look and see who it’s coming from. A small framed girl stands there with her arms crossed over her chest.
“Who the hell are you?” I ask not giving a shit really, but if she has information on Jordyn, I fucking want it.
“You are standing in my apartment. I should ask you that.” I watch her walk in, not caring that there are a shit load of big-ass bikers taking over much of the space in her tiny apartment. Instead, she walks to the fridge and grabs out a beer.
“You know where she went?” I ask. She shakes her head before looking over and saying, “No. Didn’t know she left until now.”
“You said she was scared. How do you know that?” Bash asks this time. She looks between us before she shrugs.
“I’ve lived like this for years. I know that look. She was scared of something—someone.” She eyes us all again before Micah laughs.
“We’re the good guys in this mess,” he tries to assure her, although I don’t know why. That girl is giving him a look that could kill.
“Any man that a woman is running from isn’t the ‘good guy’.” She takes another pull from her bottle. “Besides, if she wanted to talk to you, I’m sure she’d call.” My hands clench and unclench at my sides. Rage is burning its way through my system and there’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t like being out of control. I don’t like being in this position.
“You got cameras around here?” I ask, a new idea popping into my head.
“Who the hell are you, the police?” She watches me pull my phone out and begin typing shit into it.
I take a few short steps toward her before sliding the phone back into my pocket. I reach down and grab her face in my hands before forcing her to look up at me.
“We can do this one of two ways. You can answer my goddamn questions, or I can beat the fucker’s out of you.” I grit my teeth, making my point get across a little faster. I know I won’t hurt her. She doesn’t know that though, and that’s what I’m going with.
“This building doesn’t have cameras. The one next door does. If any of them picked her up it would be that one. There’s only one bus that runs around here and if she got on it, the camera at the diner probably has that footage.” I lean down closer to her face before I say, “See.... Was that so hard?” She snarls at me before I let her face go. I reach into my pocket and pull out a couple hundred before handing it to her.
“What do you want for this?” she asks licking her lips. Fucking hell.
“You just gave it to me, darlin’.”
Chapter 36
Jordyn
“This isn’t the best but it’s home,” Terry says setting my bag on the bed in the small room. Her place isn’t much to look at either but it’s better than Martha’s.
“It’s nice. Trust me. After what I lived in, this is a mansion.” I crack a smile but she still looks worried. “I promise you I won’t stay long.” She shakes her head before she says, “It’s not that. I have a little boy now, Jordyn.” My mouth hangs open. I didn’t expect her to say that.
“I didn’t know. I can’t stay here,” I tell her grabbing my bag. Terry moves quickly, taking it back out of my hand.
“Stop! You can stay. In fact, no one knows I live here except his dad. That’s where he is right now.” I slowly let out a breath before I hear it. Someone pounding on her door.
My heart leaps into my throat. Terry shakes her head before she says, “It’s probably just my neighbor. S
he checks in a lot.” Terry walks away, leaving me sitting on the edge of the bed.
It’s not until I hear her scream that I know something is very wrong. I grab my bag and climb into the closet. If they don’t see me here, they will leave her alone. At least that’s my hope.
“Where the fuck is she!” I hear him. Link. He’s screaming like a crazy person. It hasn’t even been twenty-four hours! How the fuck did he find me already?
“She’s here! I fuckin’ know you picked her up. I fuckin’ saw you on the cameras,” he roars louder.
“What the hell are you talking about? What cameras?” Terry asks loudly.
Fucking hell! He looked at the cameras? How did he know where I was, though? I sit in silence looking at the bag in my hand. Then it all hits me. The goddamn phone! He tracked the phone he gave me. Why didn’t I think about that? Link can find anything on anyone and I was too stupid to realize it.
“Look, just cut the fuckin’ shit ok? We know you picked her up. Now where the fuck is she?” I hear another voice, Bash.
“I don’t know shit. Get out before I call the cops.” Her voice squeaks slightly. “Don’t touch me!” she screams. Damn it!
I start open the closet door but it’s ripped free from the hinges before I can do anything.
“A little fuckin’ childish, hidin’ in closets don’t you think?” Link’s face is red with anger. I’ve never seen that rage in him. It’s scary as hell. He reaches for me and yanks me up by my arm roughly. He isn’t gentle and he isn’t in control of himself. He’s pissed.
“You run the fuck off! You hide from me! What the fuck are you thinkin’?” He shakes me roughly until tears fall down my cheeks. He doesn’t stop, though. He’s gone. Link’s gone in the moment. I can hear the guys walking into the room but my focus is on the rage that radiates off Link.
“You wanna answer me?” he growls. I shake my head slowly before he squeezes my arms tighter.
“You fuckin’ lied to me!” The one thing he hates the most. “I should leave your ass here. I should leave you to all the motherfucker’s that want you!” That’s it! I didn’t ask him to come find me. I didn’t ask him to save the fucking day!
“Then leave me! I didn’t tell you to come stalk me down, Link! I left for a reason!” I scream, trying to yank my arms away from his grasp.
“Yeah, cause you’re a fuckin’ liar! Did you know that I left that fuckin’ laptop unsecure on purpose? Or the fact that you found two hundred in cash? You think I’m fuckin’ stupid, Jordyn?” Another rough shake and all the fight I had in me is gone. He knows. He knows about my dad. He looked at it. He saw what I saw. He saw what happened to me. I swallow hard before shaking my head.
“You bastard.” The words barely come out of my mouth. “You bastard.” The tears fall faster.
“Me? I’m the bastard? I fuckin’ took you in. We took you in. You fucked me over. You lied to me about your dad and then fuckin’ ran from me.” I watch the way his jaw ticks with each word he says.
“I left you a note.”
Is that the best I could do? Apparently so.
Chapter 37
Link
I laugh. It’s a sick fucking laugh, too. I’m not even pissed. I’m beyond that. I don’t think there is even a word to describe the way I’m feeling right now. This shit is off the charts.
“A note? What did it say, Jordyn? Thanks for savin’ my ass but I’m a lyin’ bitch!” I roar. I know my words are harsh. I’ve never acted like this before but something about her just touches me.
“Link!” Bomber gives me a warning. I glance over before bringing my eyes back to meet Jordyn’s. It hasn’t been a full day and I want to choke her. I want to fuck her. I don’t know what the hell I want to do to her.
“I’m sorry, Link.” I shake my head. I don’t want to hear her apology. I don’t want it. I want her! Fuck!
“No. You’re not. I asked you to tell me the truth. There’s still things I don’t know isn’t there?” I look her in the eyes and wait for the inevitable. Although my voice has calmed, my body hasn’t. My brain is still running a million miles a minute.
“Yes,” she whispers softly. My heart screams to hold her. My head screams to choke her. I don’t know which one to go with here. I let my hands fall away from her and she flinches. She fucking flinches when I let her go!
“This is your call, Link. We’re gonna step out,” Bomber says. I jerk my head at him before walking over to the window. I stare out at the night sky. I let my mind wander. This is a fucking mess. I’ve made this mess. I hear her take a few steps toward me.
“How long?” I ask.
“How long what?” she replies.
“How long did he beat you?” I ask once more. My heart hammers in my chest. I know the answers. I know what I read but I want her answers. I need them. I need to hear them come from her. I don’t know why I need her confirmation but something inside of me asks for it.
“Since I was seven. My mom left us. I don’t know where she went. I remember her telling him that I was his problem. That he wanted me and she didn’t. Right after that, he took it all out on me.” I hear the pain in her voice.
“And the state kept givin’ you back because of the mayor.” She gasps, surprised that I know that.
I turn slowly and look down into her big, green eyes. Lost doesn’t begin to describe what I feel when I do that. I’m gone. In her. For her... I’m just gone.
“I should have known you would find out. I didn’t think. I just had to know when he was getting out. I had to make sure to run as far and as fast as I could.” She shakes her head. There’s more. I can see it.
“You won’t tell me the rest, will you?” She shakes her head slowly. “Will it affect the club?” She nods once. I run my hand through my hair before I ask the obvious, “Why, Jordyn?” She looks down at her feet before I grab her chin, lifting it.
“I didn’t have a choice. I don’t want you in danger but I’m afraid that I’ve already put you there.” I watch her lips. I want to fucking kiss those lips so damn bad. I can almost taste her on my tongue.
“How do you want me to protect you or this club if you lie to me?” I ask her, my voice softening. Tears continue to roll down her cheeks as she looks at me. It fucking guts me to see her like this.
“I don’t want you to. I didn’t want this for you.” Her sobs choke her. I pull her into my chest and hold her there.
“Do you have any fuckin’ idea what I want to do you?” I ask as I nuzzle my face into her hair. I inhale deeply before she says, “Kill me. That’s what they all want to do.” They all want her dead? Who the fuck are all of them? I have to get more information from her.
“You’re goin’ back with me. When we get there you’re gonna tell me what the fuck I want to know. You are gonna tell all of us what the fuck we’re up against.” Jordyn tries to pull out of my grasp but I don’t let her.
“I can’t do that. They are powerful. All of them.”
“I don’t give a shit. You’re gonna tell me!” The growl that vibrates through my chest should scare her.
She doesn’t flinch or move.
That’s a fact that I have to deal with. She’s been here before. Beaten, broken, scared. This shit isn’t new to her. Having someone actually care about her is. And I fucking care. More than I should. More than I want to. There is nothing else that I’d love to do more than make her feel how much she actually means to me. Time means nothing when your heart’s involved.
Your heart knows you.
It knows the ones you care about—and God fucking help me—I care about her.
Chapter 38
Jordyn
“I’m so sorry that this happened,” I tell Terry. She gives me a soft smile before she says, “Don’t be. Hell, I wish I had a man that would hunt me down.” She laughs a little but I just smile.
“I really am sorry,” I tell her once more.
“Call me. Don’t be a stranger this time. I’m always here.” I give her anot
her smile and nod before letting Link lead me out of her house.
I see the look in Bullet’s eyes. They are fierce. He already hates me and now I’m sure that has doubled.
“Ignore him. You’re gonna get a lot more than just that look,” Link informs me. I already know that I deserve everything I get. I know what to expect but I also know that Link always told me that they weren’t like Bone. I suppose that doesn’t mean anything, though.
I climb on the back of his bike and hold on tightly. I can feel his muscles tense before he relaxes. The ride doesn’t take long. We’re back at the clubhouse before I know it.
Something inside of me is struggling with the idea of being back here.
“Shouldn’t we be at the apartment?” I ask. Link looks at me like I’ve lost my mind.
“You think I’m lettin’ you sneak the fuck out again?” I shake my head not needing to answer that.
“I’m sorry, Link,” I say once more. He sets the helmets on the bike before putting his hands on his hips.
“What did it say?” he asks. I look at him confused before he adds, “The note.” Shit. He never saw it.
“It said I was sorry to put you in that position. I was sorry for not telling you the truth, but I was even sorrier that I didn’t stop to kiss you goodbye.” His eyes dart between mine. There are so many emotions running through him right now. I can’t help but wonder why, though. I’ve been nothing but a liar since we met.
“I want to hate you. I want to push you away. There’s so many damn things I want to do but I can’t. I don’t know why you feel safe to me.” Link shakes his head before looking away from me. Not that I could blame him. I’m nothing. I’ve become nothing but a liar.
“Why does your dad want you? Just for havin’ him put in jail?” His eyes come back to mine. The questions are flowing through him, I can see it.
“I threatened him with more time than that. He’s always gotten his way, Link. The mayor has always seen to it. They were friends for a long time. I don’t know what exactly he gets from my dad in return for all this shit.” I cross my arms over my chest as I watch Link’s eyes. He’s like a fountain of information. His mind works much like the computers he hacks. You can see the words racing around inside of him. If he wasn’t so pissed at me, it would be beautiful.