Vanessa rolls her eyes and gets up with her drink. “I don’t have to deal with some broke-ass strippers,” Vanessa says as she walks out of the room.
“What? Fuck you, too, you whack-ass weave beyotch.”
I hold Nikki back before she grabs that bitch by her extensions.
“Girl, she don’t know me. I will wipe her stank ass in her own home,” Nikki says.
“I know you will. Don’t even trip about that ho. If she thinks she’s all that because she’s screwing a drug dealer, then let her.”
“Shit, she better watch her back before I take her man,” Nikki says.
“Nikki, I don’t think you should be playing games with these niggas. Damien ain’t the most stable-minded guy around. These New York guys are straight killers,” I remind her.
“Girl, I’ll be fine. I got Damien wrapped around my clit like a baby. So, how are things with you and Tommy?” Nikki asks.
“Nikki, I know you think that I’m being stupid for falling for him, but I can’t help it. We just have this connection. I can’t explain it.”
Nikki looks at me and then puts her hand on my shoulder. “Mo, I’m sorry for coming down on you the way I did the other day. If you really have feelings for Tommy then I ain’t going to hate on that. I just don’t wanna see you get hurt, especially after what you’ve been through,” Nikki says.
“Thank you. I really do love you, Nikki. I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done for me.”
“Shut up. You gonna make me cry and mess up my mascara. You know I gotta be on point.”
I laugh and we sit on the couch and catch up with each other. An hour later, we see the guys walk back in, and Vanessa is with King.
“So, we gonna break out, all right?” Tommy says to King.
“All right, my nigga.”
“Good night, Tommy,” Vanessa says and gives Tommy a look that a woman with strong feelings would give a man.
“You guys have a good night too.” Tommy looks away, trying not to be too noticeable about it.
She’s flirting with Tommy. That was definitely more than a “see you later.” Is that why she’s coming at me like that? What the hell is going on? Is this what Tommy’s not telling me?
JAYSON
As we drive back on Peachtree Street, I notice how quiet and distant Janelle is. I’m nervous enough as it is, bringing Janelle around Vanessa. There’s no telling what she could have said to her. Judging by the expression on Janelle’s face, something bad happened. I guess I should just go ahead and set the bomb off now.
“What’s on your mind?”
“Nothing,” Janelle says, annoyed at something.
“Come on, Janelle. You’ve had this look on your face since we left the house. What’s going on?”
“That’s what I’m trying to figure out, Tommy. What is going on?”
“What?”
“Vanessa. I saw the way you two were looking at each other, and don’t tell me I didn’t see it.”
“Janelle, it’s more complicated than you think.”
“Then uncomplicate it for me,” Janelle says.
Damn, if I lie again, it’ll only make shit even more stressful for her.
“I knew her from high school.”
“Oh my God, you two were together back then?” I don’t answer her. “Why didn’t you say something to me?”
“Janelle, what was I going to say to you? That twelve years ago I was with a girl who’s now with a major hustler?”
“Tommy, if King finds out, do you know what he’ll do?”
“Yeah, I think I know,” I tell her.
“No wonder she was coming at me like that.” Janelle stares out the window. She then turns and looks at me. “When you were in New York, did you sleep with her?”
I look at her and then turn away. It starts to rain lightly outside.
“Wow, complete silence. I guess that answers that question. Pull over,” Janelle demands.
“What?”
“I said pull over. I’m getting out.”
“And go where? It’s raining,” I say.
“Either pull the fucking car over or I’ll jump out!” she yells.
“Fine.”
I pull over to the curb and Janelle gets out, slamming the door. She starts to walk down the sidewalk in the rain. I turn off the engine, get out, and start to follow her.
“Janelle, Janelle! Wait up!” I yell.
“For what, Tommy?” Janelle starts to cry. I catch up with her and grab her arm. She pulls away.
“Will you let me explain?”
“Explain what, Tommy? You never explain shit to me! You have all your little secrets that you won’t tell me! I can’t believe I thought that you could be honest with me! Nikki was right. I was stupid to believe you could ever love me. All I am to you is some stripper that you’re fucking right now,” Janelle says.
“That’s not true. You mean more to me than that.”
“No matter how much I change my life, it won’t change who I am, or what I was. You can’t be real with me because I don’t mean nothing to you.”
“It’s not that simple!”
“It is, Tommy! If you really care about me, it is.” Janelle stares into my eyes with tears in her eyes. “Just what I thought.” Janelle turns around and walks away.
“I’m a cop.”
I can’t believe I just said that. What the hell am I thinking? I just blew my cover.
Janelle turns and looks at me in shock. “You’re a cop?”
I stare in her eyes.
“My name is Officer Jayson Harper. I’ve been deep in cover in Atlanta for five months. That’s my secret. I never meant to feel . . . I didn’t know I would feel like this for you. I never meant to lie to you,” I say to her as she stares into my eyes in disbelief.
“I knew there was something different about you, but not this. Now it all makes sense. Were you ever going to tell me?” she asks.
“Yeah.”
Janelle stares at me and then closes her eyes. “Vanessa knows who you are. If she says something to King, you’re dead.”
“Vanessa wants out. She’s not going to say anything to him. She’s counting on me bringing him down,” I tell her.
“She’s counting on you? Do you still love her?”
Damn, I wasn’t expecting her to just come right out and hit me with that question.
“I did.... I thought I still did, but I don’t feel the same way about her like I feel for you. I love you.”
A tear falls from Janelle’s eye. “I don’t know you,” she says and walks away.
She’s right. I don’t even know myself anymore. I just compromised my cover and possibly my life for a woman I barely know. I’ve got a job to do, and all I seem to care about is her. Who the hell am I anymore?
9
One Way or Another
DAMIEN
Back on the corner, we set up shop just like we did up north. We get these bitches with houses, move in, pay their rent, and cook the coke. We sell the shit right there. The problem is, some of these bitches get a little too greedy. Sure, we hit them off with a supply of whatever it is they’re using, but some just can’t get enough.
For instance, take this bitch, Yvonne. We set up in her house three months ago. We did our usual thing and hit her off with some blow. Turns out her man Curtis is a fiend, too, and they decide to have a private party with my shit.
Tommy and I are driving down Riverdale Road when we see these fools coming out of a QT gas station.
“Yo, Tommy, there’s that bitch Yvonne and her man Curtis.” I pull into the parking lot in front of them and we jump out. Yvonne and Curtis start to run, and I catch her ass behind the building.
“Where you running to, bitch?” I yell.
“Damien, please!” she yells.
I slap her and she falls on the ground. “I want my money, bitch!” I pull her hair and put my .45 in her face.
“Anything you want, Damien! Please, don’t kill me!�
�� Yvonne yells.
“You got one week, bitch. I want my fucking money!” I shove her on the ground.
I turn and see that Tommy is caught up with Curtis’s bitch-ass. Curtis tries to fight Tommy and punches him in the face. Tommy then proceeds to kick the shit outta that nigga. I don’t know what’s gotten into Tommy, but he’s stomping this nigga like a cockroach. He’s been real irritable this past week.
“Who the fuck you trying, nigga?” Tommy yells. “Bitch-ass mutherfucka!” Tommy kicks him in the face. I see a nigga that works in the QT on his cell phone calling the cops, and I grab Tommy.
“Come on, nigga. We gotta go,” I say.
“Fuck that shit! This nigga think I’m playing with him!” Tommy still wants to beat this nigga’s ass.
“Tommy, come on, man!” I pull him off of Curtis and we hop back in the car and take off.
I’ve never seen Tommy so fired up. Usually, it’s him telling me to calm down, but something has got him pissed.
“Yo, what’s up with you, Tommy?” I ask him as we turn back on to Riverdale Road.
“Nothing.”
“You were kicking homeboy to sleep back there.”
“That nigga punched me,” Tommy says.
“Yeah, but you been acting funny all week, nigga. What’s going on?”
“Nothing, man, just some bullshit.”
“Mo’Nique ain’t taking care of you?” I ask.
“Fuck her, man,” Tommy says.
“What? I know you fucking her. What’s wrong? She ain’t break you off right, son?” I say with a laugh.
“She ain’t nothing, man. Plenty more ass in Atlanta,” Tommy remarks and then spits out the window.
“That’s what I always say to you, nigga. Too many hoes out here to be tied down to one.” He just told me what I wanted to hear him say.
Yeah, plenty of ass, nigga, and soon I’m gonna be getting up in Mo’Nique’s.
That night, I go by Nikki’s house at about one o’clock in the morning. I know Nikki and Penny are at The Pink Palace. Since Mo’Nique’s stopped dancing, I know she’ll be there by herself. I knock on the door and she answers.
“Who is it?” Mo’Nique asks.
“It’s me, Damien.”
She opens the door for me and she’s dressed in a T-shirt and shorts. Damn, her thick ass is fine. “Nikki’s at the club tonight, Dame,” she says.
“I know. I wanted to talk to you.”
“About what?”
“About Tommy,” I say.
She gets a sad look on her face, then lets me in. “What about Tommy?” she asks.
“What happened between you two? You got my man all stressed.”
“I didn’t do anything to Tommy. Whatever he’s going through, that’s on him,” Mo’Nique says as she leans against the wall. I can’t help but stare at her smooth, thick thighs.
“All right. I just wanted to know what’s up. So, how you doing?”
“I’m fine, Damien. Look, it’s late and I gotta get up early tomorrow for work,” she says.
“So, you quit dancing? That’s cool. A girl like you is too fine to be shaking ass at a strip club.”
“Thanks. Is that all?”
I walk up to her and put my hand on the wall next to her.
“I just wanna know if there’s anything I can do for you.”
“Damien, I told you that I ain’t messing with you. You’re with Nikki, and I don’t do shit like that to my family.”
“Come on, ma. You know what I can do for you. I just wanna know if you can do all the shit Tommy says you can do,” I say to her as I caress her leg.
She pulls away. “I don’t give a shit what Tommy said to you! And I don’t need anything from you,” Mo’Nique says.
She thinks this is a game, so I grab her arm and pull her close to me. I press my dick up against her leg. “I ain’t playing with you, Mo’Nique! You know how I get down. Just relax and let’s have some fun.” My dick gets harder, pressing up on her.
“Or what? You gonna rape me? I don’t think Tommy’s gonna like that.”
I kiss her lips and rub her soft titty. She turns her head. I’m gonna just take this pussy right here. I don’t give a fuck. This bitch is too fine.
“Tommy don’t give a shit about you. Now you can give me that ass or I can take it.”
Mo’Nique nods her head and pulls off her shirt. Her titties are prettier up close than they look on stage. I grab her left tit and put it in my mouth and start to suck it. I push my hands in her shorts, and she clenches her legs together. I grab her by the neck and push her head up against the wall.
“Don’t fight me, bitch!”
I can see the fear in her eyes. She knows I mean business. She opens her legs. Just as I get my hand under her panties, a car pulls up in the driveway. Shit, it’s Nikki and Penny’s ass. I pull up off of her.
“Put your shirt back on. Don’t say anything or you know what will happen to Nikki and you.”
“Okay.”
I sit on the couch and turn on the TV as Nikki and Penny walk in the door.
“Hey, what are you doing here, baby?” Nikki asks me.
“What do you think? Waiting for you, ma. I just got here a minute ago and decided to make myself at home and wait for ya,” I say.
Nikki looks at Mo’Nique, and I know she thinks that I’m lying, but she doesn’t say anything about it to me.
“Oh, okay. Come on, daddy. I don’t wanna keep you waiting anymore. Good night, Mo.”
Mo’Nique just nods her head to her. I give her a look before I walk into Nikki’s bedroom behind her. She knows I’m going to get her ass one way or another. It’s just a matter of time.
MO’NIQUE
He tried to rape me. That dirty muthafucka would’ve raped me in the living room. I was so scared. It felt like I was 16 years old again, helpless as James raped me. It’s going to happen again. I can’t stop him. Thank God Nikki and Penny came home when they did. Damien is fucking crazy—he would’ve killed me. I’m just a piece of ass to him, something less than a woman. A ho. I can’t even tell Tommy what happened.
He’s a cop. Tommy’s a cop. That’s not even his real name. He’s been lying to me since the night we met. I should just wipe my tears away and forget him. I completely opened myself up to him, and he lied to me. He fucked that bitch Vanessa! I hate him. I hate him and Damien.
Stop fucking crying! You don’t give a shit about no trick! That’s all he is, that’s all he ever was! You’re a hustler, Mo’Nique, shake it off.
I just fooled myself into thinking I felt something for him. Fucking pig! I should have told them who he was, but I couldn’t do it. I don’t want them to kill him, and that pisses me off even more, that I still care about him.
I hate Jayson so much. So why am I at his door? I drove here as soon as Damien went in the room with Nikki. I couldn’t stay there tonight. Not with him there. I just got in my car and drove to Jayson’s place. He’s the last person I want to see, but I need him. I got nobody else to turn to. But he doesn’t care about me. . . . I shouldn’t have come here. He’s just a cop doing his job.
Just as I turn and start to walk back to my car, the door opens.
“Janelle?”
As soon as I hear his voice, I feel my eyes water up. He walks outside, and I can’t move. He lied to me. I shouldn’t be here, but as soon as he touches my back, I can’t hold it back anymore, and I start to cry.
“Janelle, what’s wrong? What happened?” Jayson asks.
I can’t talk. I just break down in his arms and cry. Jayson wraps his arms around me, and I feel safe again. How can somebody that hurt me so bad make me feel so good? Jayson takes me inside and we sit on his sofa.
“What happened, Janelle?”
“If I tell you, you’re going to do something stupid and get yourself killed.”
“What? What happened? Tell me, baby.”
“Damien . . . tried to rape me tonight.”
Jayson doesn’t say
a word. He just gets up, goes in his room, and comes out three seconds later with his gun. I jump up off the sofa and grab Jayson.
“No! Jayson, don’t do this, please,” I beg him.
“He’s dead! This ends tonight!” Jayson yells.
“Please, baby, don’t do this. You can’t. Please.”
Jayson looks in my eyes, and I gently take his gun out of his hands.
“Did he hurt you?”
“No . . . he would’ve if I didn’t let him. Nikki and Penny came home before he could do anything to me.”
“Tomorrow you’re going to pack a few bags and you’re going to come and stay here with me,” Jayson tells me.
“But what about Damien? He’s going to know I said something to you.”
“Just leave Damien to me. I’m not going to let him hurt you,” Jayson says as he caresses my face. “Do you forgive me?” he asks.
“Yeah. I understand the situation you were in, Tom—Jayson. It was just hard to know you slept with her.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t expect to see Vanessa again. I didn’t know I would have feelings for you. I didn’t even know what we really had.”
“So, you do love me?” I ask him.
Jayson looks at me. “Yeah, I do.” He kisses me.
“It’s just going to be weird calling you Jayson now.”
“How about I call you Janelle when we’re here?” Jayson suggests.
“Okay.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, I was just scared. Can you just hold me tonight?”
Jayson smiles and takes me to his bedroom. He undresses me and we lie in bed together. Jayson holds me. It doesn’t matter to me if his name is Tommy or Jayson. I just know that when I’m with him, I feel loved and safe. I don’t wanna let him go.
Later that night, we talk about Jayson’s life for a change.
“So, where are you from?” I ask him.
“Savannah. I went undercover here five months ago.”
“How long have you been an undercover cop?”
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